Despite myself, I couldn’t deny that Ember was a beautiful woman and I was still attracted to her—a lot. But I loathed everything else about her.
“So, Red, with Torch leaving tomorrow, it looks like you’ll be stuck with me hanging out at your place,” Fitz said, causing Ember to turn away from me.
“Why’s that?” she asked.
“I’m your new bodyguard,” he responded, waggling his eyebrows at her.
Viking had pulled aside the officers earlier today, asking one of us to be responsible for Ember while she was here. Fitz had immediately volunteered but Viking ordered all of us single officers to take turns, which meant everyone but Viking and Mac. I suggested putting a couple of prospects on the job, but Viking wouldn’t hear of it. To him, Ember was family.
For the most part, until we knew where we stood with the Phantoms, families of patched members were getting extra security and random check-ins by club members, so this command wasn’t out of line. I just didn’t want any part of it but knew it’d be unavoidable.
“Wait, you called her Red. How come you never gave me a nickname?” Kate pouted.
“It’s not like he came up with an original one.” I knew I sounded like a dick, but I didn’t care.
“Surprisingly, Fitz is the only person to call me Red. I kinda like it.” Ember smiled at Fitz, and the bastard looked smug as hell. “And I’m excited to hang out with you tomorrow,” she said
What the hell? Fitz hadn’t been joking that as soon as Torch was out of the picture, he’d make his move. By the way Ember was acting, she was looking forward to that hook up as much as Fitz.
Kate turned to talk to Ember about her friend Evelyn who worked at the hospital and started to make a plan to introduce them soon. Fitz joined their conversation, and I became more irritated with their interaction.
I didn’t know if Fitz was trying to fuck with me or really make a play for her, but I didn’t plan on sticking around to find out.
“I think I’m calling it a night,” I announced, knowing I needed to get away from all this crap.
I said my goodbyes and didn’t miss the way Ember watched as Amy and Naomi hurried after me.
“Have fun!” Fitz yelled as I flipped him off over my shoulder.
I heard him laugh and then say something about threesomes and how it was a typical night for me. It hadn’t always been that way, but it was pretty accurate now.
On the way up to my room, I noticed Torch on the receiving end of a very public blowjob from one of our hangarounds. Even though Ember was no different than the woman on her knees, I didn’t get how Torch could be possessive of one woman and then turn around and cheat on his old lady and his side piece without a second thought. But what did I care? You get what you deserve, and I wasn’t going to feel bad for someone who had no shame.
9
Ember
I’d been in Las Vegas for almost a month, and I couldn’t have been happier with my decision to take Viking up on his offer. Getting away from Torch had done wonders for my soul. In the meantime, I’d reconnected with Melissa a couple times, and the job Evelyn helped find for me at the hospital in the billing department was going well.
I felt more like myself, like my life was finally turning out the way it should. The way Dad would have wanted it.
Much to my relief, Phoebe’s move to NYC went off without a hitch, and she’d enrolled at a good school in my aunt’s neighborhood and was already making friends. She’d given James and me so much hell about moving, but it was working out better than expected. Mom was still sad but she sounded more at peace each time we talked and I think having Phoebe there was helping.
I knew James appreciated hearing good news from all us girls, as I could imagine prison life was incredibly depressing. But whenever we talked, he never sounded down. Instead he was determined and looking forward to his release in five months. We were all counting down the time, me especially.
The one dent in my world was Colt, who still continued to avoid me like the plague, or had some snarky, sarcastic thing to say to me. I’d asked Fitz about it one time, but he’d just laughed and said Colt was always an asshole and to not take it personally. But the way he acted toward me was colder than he was with anyone else.
Thoughts about Torch were few and far between, but when I did think about him, it left me super anxious. I was surprised he hadn’t bothered me yet, especially since I was supposed to be doing a job for him while I was here, but all of October, I’d been able to live my life like a normal woman. I knew it was only a matter of time before he reached out, but I was grateful for the peace right now, nonetheless.
Viking remained true to his word about keeping an eye on me. He insisted on someone picking me up and dropping me off every day at the hospital. I thought it was overkill, but I saw my father react the same way to threats in the past, so I was used to it. And it wasn’t just me. The families of other members were also getting the same treatment. It made me wonder what threats were out there, but since no one told me anything, I wouldn’t worry about it. I had enough on my mind.
I walked out of the sliding doors at the end of my shift and found Fitz and Colt waiting in the parking lot. It took me a minute to realize they were there for me since I thought Hawk was picking me up. And while Fitz was one of the more regular members who checked up on me, I’d only seen Colt in passing a couple of times since the night of the party a few weeks ago. I hated to admit that him ignoring me had any sort of impact on my mood, but it did. It felt too similar to his rejection of me when we were younger, and it bugged me more than watching him take two women back to his room the night of the party.
Colt affected me in a way I couldn’t explain or even understand. Maybe it was because he was the first guy I liked enough to sleep with, but it was more than that.
Slowly, I approached them, hoping there wasn’t a more serious reason for two of them picking me up.
I forced my gaze toward Fitz, who was hotter than ninety-nine percent of the male population. Any girl would get tongue-tied around both of these men. The attention they were garnering here in the parking lot was proof that I wasn’t the only one who found them attractive. A group of nurses on their break kept glancing in our direction. One of the more bold nurses was staring and daring one of them to make a move.
“Hey,” I greeted, looking at my feet instead of them.
“Red, babe! What’s up?” Fitz asked once I reached his bike.
“You tell me. I wasn’t expecting to see you both here.” I smiled at Fitz and chanced a glance over at Colt.
He continued to stare at me with his ever-present scowl, seeming irritated with the banter between Fitz and me. How I wished he would smile at me like he did when we first met. These days, he never smiled or laughed and when he did, it wasn’t happy.
“Viking sent Hawk out on a run. Colt and I were both off today, so we’re here. Looks like it’s your lucky day.” He winked as he passed me the helmet hanging from his handlebars.
I secured the helmet on my head and proceeded to climb on the back of Fitz’s bike. I would be lying if I said I didn’t have a fleeting thought of jumping on the back of Colt’s. I could imagine what it would feel like to have my arms wrapped around his body while flying down the highway. I knew it would be perfect, but I also knew it would never happen.
It only took about fifteen minutes before we were pulling up in front of my house, and I was sad that our ride was over. I may have liked being away from the club up in Reno, but I was a little lonely here.
While I was getting to know the club better, I still wasn’t really part of them, this chapter, their family. Kate and Meredith were always friendly to me when I saw them at the clubhouse, and it was great having Fitz around, but I had this feeling their actions were purely out of respect they had for Viking. I didn’t mind having to earn that right to be one of them in the fullest sense, but the club easily took over your entire life, which meant not many friends outside the club, and when you’re no
t fully in it, you feel it. And after a month of being in limbo, I felt it rather hard.
“Thanks for the ride home.” Whoever dropped me off usually waited long enough to make sure I made it in safely before taking off. Since I didn’t want to be alone tonight, I took a chance and invited them in. “Do you guys want to stay for dinner?”
“Are you going to cook for us?” Fitz asked as I handed him my helmet.
“I can,” I answered, hoping the promise of a home-cooked meal would entice them enough to stay.
“Sounds good to me,” Fitz responded. “Colt, you comin’, man?”
Colt looked up from the cell phone he’d been typing on since we stopped and shook his head. “Looks like something came up with Jenna. I gotta go.”
Fitz just nodded his head and said, “All right, I’ll see you tomorrow.”
Colt was so quick to run off that I couldn’t help but wonder who Jenna was. It begged the question of what kind of woman garnered that sort of attention from the grumpy vice president.
As disappointed as I was that Colt was leaving, I was glad Fitz was staying. I led him inside and toward the kitchen where two barstools were set up at the counter.
“You want something to drink?” I asked after I put my backpack and keys on the small table in the living room.
“Beer, if you have any.”
Growing up around the guys I did, I knew to always have beer stocked in my fridge. I grabbed two bottles and handed one to Fitz.
He took a healthy swig from his bottle before turning to me. “So, how’s work going?”
“It’s good. The hospital uses a different system than the one I’m used to, so there has been a bit of a learning curve, but I’m adjusting.”
“Are you happy with your decision to move here?”
There seemed to be more behind his question than he was saying and he was watching me too closely as he was apt to do since I’d moved here, so I didn’t know how I should answer. I was happy with my decision, but as far as anyone knew, I was only here because my brother was locked up. Who would be happy about that? But I knew Fitz caught some of my reactions to Torch. He never said anything directly, but he hinted at it a few times.
I managed to keep my secrets about Torch up to this point, and I didn’t plan on sharing now. No matter how much I trusted Fitz, I couldn’t go there. At least until I came up with a plan but Torch was smarter than I’d given him credit for. I hadn’t been able to figure out a single way to retaliate against him or find the upper hand, at least not yet. Fitz would probably do something stupid if he found out my secrets, and I couldn’t have that hanging over my head.
“I am. With everything going on with James and the rest of my family, this has been a welcomed change.” That was vague, but it answered his question.
But then he decided to be more direct. “How long have you and Torch been together?”
I’d been dreading this type of question, but at least it was coming from Fitz first—and not Colt. “About eight months,” I began, picking at the label of my beer bottle. “We got together when dad first got sick.” I paused, remembering that excruciating time. The cancer had hit hard and brutally fast. “Mom, James, and Phoebe had their own grief to deal with, and Torch was there for me when I needed someone.”
That was all true, but Torch used my darkest time to get close to me, and it wasn’t out of the kindness of his heart. It had soon become clear he had an ulterior motive and I knew it was to have more influence over James.
“Isn’t he still married?”
I felt myself deflate from his question. It wasn’t asked out of malice, and I didn’t detect any judgment in his tone, but I was still ashamed of being seen as a home-wrecker by anyone when that wasn’t the case at all.
As far as I could tell, most of the Vegas chapter didn’t have much awareness of my connection to Torch other than the officers. But Colt had said enough on that topic, and if he felt that way, they all probably did, even Viking. He’d said nothing, but if Fitz was asking, I wouldn’t be surprised if Viking asked the same thing at some point. I had this paranoid feeling they all knew and it was why I’d only received polite but indifferent interactions with most of the old ladies. They weren’t sure if I’d try to steal their men because it appeared to be my thing.
“He is,” I finally said. I could have left it at that, but I felt a need to try to defend myself a bit. “Torch and his wife got married because her father threatened him with jail time for statutory rape when he got her pregnant. She was seventeen at the time, and he was twenty. She got involved with Torch to piss off her parents, but her dad’s a really important lawyer in Reno and had the power and money to back up their threats. At this point, it’s just easier for them to stay together. They have an understanding.”
The reason they got married was true, but his wife didn’t look the other way when it came to me or other women. Our numerous confrontations were evidence of that. However, since she looked down on the club and never participated in club functions in any way, she hadn’t earned any friends amongst members and their old ladies, so a lot of them felt like Torch had a right to have someone on the side that was part of our world.
The real truth was that Torch liked having access to his wife’s family’s money and he’d managed to use her dad’s position and influence to get members out of tough situations. So James and the others had a reason to look the other way when it came to me being in a relationship with Torch—his connections were a huge benefit to the club—and ultimately, that’s all that mattered to them.
I also knew his wife loved being able to tell her friends her husband was a badass biker and annoy her parents, and therefore, wanted to project she had this happy life and marriage. Whether they actually loved each other seemed irrelevant, something I didn’t understand at all.
But I didn’t tell Fitz any of that because I didn’t want him to see the logic of that part of the situation, and suddenly be accepting of it. I liked knowing someone cared about me and my well being that had nothing to do with the club, and Fitz did. He was a great friend, maybe my best friend here.
When I looked up at him, I didn’t know if my simplified explanation sounded believable, but Fitz seemed to accept it.
He reached over and rubbed my knee. It was a sweet and unexpected gesture from the guy who usually joked around with me. “You deserve so much more than that.”
He didn’t elaborate further on that, and the two of us fell into easy conversation about less heavy topics. It felt natural, and I enjoyed spending time with him and talking. After a while, I decided to broach the subject that was bothering me since we got home.
“So, Jenna? Is that Colt’s girlfriend?” The minute the words left my mouth, I felt like an idiot. It was so obvious, and even Fitz chuckled at my question.
“Huh, why are you so curious about the bastard?” he asked with a twinkle in his eye.
I shrugged. “Um… I’m not, not really. He got out of here in a hurry. Just wondering is all.”
“Okay, we’ll play it your way. Jenna is no one you need to concern yourself with. They’re not together. However, due to circumstances I’ll let him explain, when she calls, he answers.”
That seemed odd to me. I didn’t know very many men who would drop everything to be at some woman’s beck and call if he wasn’t sleeping with her. Unless, of course, it was a family member. But if that were the case, Fitz would have come out and said that instead of giving me a cryptic answer. Then again, one cryptic answer for another.
I didn’t even know why I cared. Colt made it clear how he felt about me. I had to stop comparing the Colt I knew as a teen to the man he was now. Obviously, I had unresolved feelings for him and it bugged me that I couldn’t get past it since he’d clearly moved on. I knew so little about him but I craved to know more, whatever tidbits I could glean, I found myself seeking them out. I was just torturing myself by fantasizing about the man I could never have.
Deciding to turn the conversation a
way from Colt, I stood up and began pulling food out of the refrigerator.
“You don’t happen to be a fan of breakfast for dinner, do you?”
“Babe, if you make it, I’ll eat it.”
He was such a nice guy, and I loved having my friend back in my life.
“Thanks for staying tonight. It gets a little lonely sometimes living by myself.”
I’d never lived on my own before, and it was taking a little while to adjust to the quiet.
“Anytime, Red. In case I haven’t mentioned it, I’m happy to have you back. You can always call me when you need company,” he said as he gave me a side hug.
I hugged him back, missing something as basic as a hug. Even though I was glad to have Fitz and to be away from Torch, there was nothing really filling the hole inside me because just when things seemed calm, I knew it was only a matter of time before it all went to hell. But for now, right this moment, today—I could pretend that everything would be okay.
10
Colt
I pulled up to the large wrought iron gate and pushed the button on the intercom alerting Jenna to my arrival. Sitting on my bike, wearing my cut, made me stick out like a sore thumb in this neighborhood full of gated homes and mini-mansions. I was positive the neighbors could hear me anytime I pulled up, and I found it surprising the cops had yet to be called.
The gate swung open without anyone asking who was there first. Jenna took it for granted that I would show up the minute she texted me, and being here now proved her right. I inched forward and then followed the driveway up to the large brick home. The moment I stepped off my bike, the front door was flung open and two of the cutest things in the entire world came barreling toward me.
Colt (Desert Sinners MC Book 2) Page 6
