by Ann, Jewel
“Jake!” She pounds my back.
I heave her into the water. She goes under for a few seconds while finding her feet.
“Not cool!” She gasps, wiping her eyes.
I cant my head. “Hmm … not yet.”
“Not yet, wha—no!” She cries to the wild as I sweep her up again and drop her into the water.
This is fun—a sentiment I never imagined having on this road trip.
“You’re going to drown me, you big bully!”
I cant my head again. “Better.”
“Don’t—” She jerks back as I reach for her face. When she realizes I’m not going to pick her up, she pauses, letting me rub my thumbs under her eyes to remove the last few streaks of black eye makeup.
“Much better.” I wink. “I’m not sure why you feel the need to put so much shit on this face of yours. It’s …”
Her hands rest on my wrists. “It’s what?”
“It’s a…” I weigh my words “…a decent face all on its own.”
“Decent?” Her eyes widen.
“Decent.” I grin. “Let’s go.”
“Jake, no!”
I flip her over my shoulder again. “Chill. I’m just carrying you back to the tent.” This day has been something. I’m not sure how to describe it. I’ve wanted to wrap my hands around her neck and strangle the diva out of her, but I can also say it’s been awhile since I’ve smiled like I just did in the creek with her.
She steadies herself with my biceps as I set her on her feet.
“Strip before you go in the tent.”
Those big eyes inspect me again. I turn around. “I’ll give you ten seconds before I turn back around, so you’d better get out of those wet clothes and get your naked ass in the tent. One …”
“Jeez, did you never learn to count past ten?”
“Two …”
“I’m stripping, but it’s not easy when I’m soaking wet.”
“Three …”
She dives into the tent by seven. I glance back at the pile of her clothes, including her pink panties and matching bra.
“Behave,” I whisper to myself. “Can you dress as quickly as you strip? I don’t mean to offend you, but you’re good at stripping.”
“Shut it. And don’t you dare come in here yet. You have to let me decide what I’m going to wear before you count to ten like a big boy.”
“You’re playing with fire.”
“Can you just pretend to have manners for a few minutes?”
“Sixty seconds is my manner limit.”
“Done!” She peeks out of the tent wearing more pink—short shorts and a tank top—and a ridiculous grin.
I start to shrug off my wet shirt.
“Oh jeepers …” She hides back inside the tent. “Things I don’t need to see.”
I smirk to myself.
“I’m ready when you are,” she calls.
“Ready for what?”
“You to come inside.”
I unzip the flap the rest of the way.
“I can’t see you.”
Just when I’m certain things can’t get any crazier, they do. She’s perched in the corner in lotus pose on her sleeping bag with a pink satin sleep mask over her eyes.
“Just tell me when you’re dressed.”
With my back to her, I pull up my gym shorts, sans underwear, halfway up my legs. “I’m basically there.”
“Okay—oh! Oh, oh, oh! No! You are not dressed yet.” She slaps her hands over her face, fumbling to get her mask back down over her eyes. “Why would you do that?”
I slide my shorts up the rest of the way and pull on a T-shirt before hunching down in front of her to peel her hands away from her face.
Avery exhales in relief until her gaze meets my T-shirt.
My heart has no room for you,
but the trunk of my car definitely does.
“Nice shirt. You know, a lesser woman would be offended by you wearing it in her presence.”
“But you’re definitely not a lesser woman, are you?”
“No.” Her timid reply holds no conviction.
“Well, I’m calling it a night.”
Her head jerks back. “It’s not even nine.”
I grab my toothbrush. “I’m an early riser.”
“Ugh! Not me.” She wrestles with her sleeping bag. “We need to stop and pick me up a blowup mattress. There’s no way in hell I’m sleeping on the ground from here to L.A.”
“Noted.” I brush my teeth and fall like a tree onto my sleeping bag while she fumbles with her shitload of stuff.
Somewhere between her bitching about the temperature in the tent and the lumpy ground, I fall asleep.
By six the next morning, she’s snoring loud enough to wake every animal within a five-mile radius. Naturally, I take a video of it with my phone. At some point, I will have to bring her to heel, and I think this little piece of cinematography will do the trick.
“Rise and shine. It’s time to hit the road.”
She grumbles rolling to her side. “Oh my back …” Peeking out from under her eye mask, she inspects me. “Did you shower?”
“Bathed in the creek after my jog.”
“You’ve jogged already?”
“Yes. Get up. Let’s go.”
“I need a bathroom. A shower.”
“The creek feels amazingly refreshing this morning.”
Avery sits up, fiddling with her hair again. “I’m not bathing in the creek.”
“Then you can grab a shower at the next stop. Campgrounds with facilities.”
“Pee! I need to pee, Jake! Why do you make me spell everything out for you?”
“Oh …” I hold up a finger and retrieve a gift for her from my plastic container.
“What the hell is this?” She frowns as I hand her the gift.
“It’s a feminine urination device. You can use it to stand up and piss. Basically, it’s a portable penis.”
She pulls it out of the tube and looks at the directions. “Huh … looks pretty simple.”
I nod with pride.
She grabs her pink silk robe and slides her feet into heeled slippers with feathers on the top. In all fairness, when she packed for her trip to visit her dad, she probably never expected to be sleeping in a tent, but seriously … heeled slippers?
Brushing by me, she sniffs. “You smell good, like soapy good.”
“I used liquid Castile soap in the creek.”
“I’m not bathing in that creek. There’s no way to get clean in dirty water.”
I shrug. “Well, you sure think I smell clean.”
“Humph.” Avery takes off to find a spot behind a tree to pee.
After a few expletives, she returns, flicking the funneled device at me. I let it fall to the ground since it’s covered in urine, just like her inner thighs and silk robe.
“I’ve got pee all over myself and THERE’S NO SHOWER!”
I bite back my smile as she marches over to the creek. “Wanna use my soap?”
“Yes, get the fucking soap and throw that stupid practical joke in the trash. Clearly a cruel man invented that.”
After she simmers off in the creek and dresses to the nines again for the second day of our trip, I load up the pickup while she pouts in the front seat, messing with her tangled and ratted hair.
“I need a shower so bad …” she says for the hundredth time. “I’m disintegrating from the outside in.”
“Taking off?”
I glance up and cringe as my friend, Addy, walks our way from the house.
“You forgot your razor.” She holds up her hand with my razor.
“What the fuck?” Avery whispers, kicking open her door the rest of the way.
“Oh.” Addy’s gaze flits from me to Avery. “You have a guest?” She holds out her hand to Avery. “I’m Addy. Jake didn’t mention you were with him. Did you need to shower inside too?”
My balls crawl up into my body for protection as Avery slowly turn
s toward me.
CHAPTER SEVEN
Avery plots my long, torturous death with one single look before returning her attention to Addy. “I’m Avery and I would love a shower. I would be forever in your debt for a shower. I’m certain I would sell my soul for a shower.”
Addy laughs. “The shower is free. You can keep your soul and leave here debt free.”
“Sorry.” I offer both women a tight smile. “Where are my manners? Addy, Avery. Avery, Addy. Sounds like a rhyme.”
Addy smiles. Avery does not.
Swarley whines. That’s basically all he does. He spent most of the night under the outside cover to the tent, probably to avoid the warm fuzzies between Avery and me. He whined, Avery told him to get inside the tent. He refused.
I stayed out of it.
Not my dog. Not my problem.
“Have you eaten, Avery? Can I get you something?”
“Avery’s on a water fast.” I pull out her suitcases, not knowing which one has her bathing shit.
Avery lets Swarley out of the back of the truck since we’re clearly not leaving for awhile. “I was yesterday, but I’m breaking the fast this morning. If it wouldn’t be too much trouble, I’d be happy with a banana or a handful of crackers. I’m starving.”
Addy nods toward the house. “I think I can do better than a banana and a handful of crackers. I’m a little surprised Chef Matthews didn’t offer you something from his stash.”
I roll my eyes as Avery tugs her suitcases toward the house.
“Jake, manners. Don’t make her lug those suitcases.” Addy punches me in the arm.
“Avery’s very independent.”
Avery releases the suitcases and keeps walking without a glance back. “I’m really not. Swarley, go lie down.” She points to a shady spot before the steps to the front door.
Addy snickers as I grab the suitcases, holding my breath to keep from grumbling.
“Top of the stairs to the left, Avery. Towels are in the warmer. Help yourself to soap, shampoo, absolutely anything. I’ll start making breakfast.”
“Thank you so much.” Avery gives Addy a genuine, I-owe-you-my-life smile, but when her gaze lands on me nudging her toward the stairs, she narrows her eyes, jaw muscles working overtime.
I smirk. “I’m not claustrophobic. You can tie me up before you kill me. Have you ever tied a man up, Avery?”
In spite of her obvious hatred toward me at the moment, her lips fight what I know is a grin.
“Anything else?” I set her suitcases just outside of the bathroom door.
After making a slow inspection of the bathroom, she turns back to me. “Your friend has good taste in decor.”
I lean against the doorframe. “She does.”
“Except when it comes to friends.” Avery crosses her arms over her chest. “You are a terrible person. The king of scumbags. I don’t know how someone as nice as her ever befriended you.”
I nod, biting my lips together. “I’ll be downstairs. Take your time as long as it’s less than twenty minutes.”
“Asshole.” She grabs the door.
“Princess.” I step back just as she slams it in my face.
“Still here?”
I turn toward the familiar Latin accent. “Yes, Quinn, unfortunately I’m still here.” I head down the stairs as Addy’s husband follows me.
“Gentlemen.” Addy eyes us both with her have-you-been-playing-nicely look as her hands stay busy preparing food in their gourmet kitchen.
“Beautiful.” Quinn presses his chest to her back, kissing her neck and whispering something in her ear that makes her blush.
She nudges him with her elbow and clears her throat. “So, Jake, you’ve found a good match, huh?”
I pull out the barstool and slide onto it as Quinn pours a glass of juice. “Avery?” I chuckle. “Just met her. I’m giving her and the dog a ride to L.A. for a friend.”
“Wow!” Addy’s eyes shoot open wide. “That’s how you treat someone you just met? You must really like her.”
“What?” I jerk my head back.
“You’re pretending that she irritates you, when what really irritates you is that she does in fact rub you the wrong way for whatever reason, yet you’re still attracted to her.”
I glance at Quinn. He eyes me over the rim of his juice glass.
“I hated Quinn … seriously hated him.” Addy twists her lips.
“Thanks a lot, baby.” He sets his glass in the sink. “I’ll be in my office. Let me know when the kiddos wake up.”
She shakes her head. “It’s summer. I don’t think we’ll see them for another hour or so.”
“You’re happy.” I smile.
Addy matches my smile. “Deliriously. But you know this, so stop trying to change the subject.”
“What subject?”
“You and Avery.”
I lace my fingers behind my head. “There is no me and Avery. I’ve known her for two seconds. She’s a diva. I prefer the dog to her, but I feel indebted to a friend, so I’m sacrificing my summer road trip to chauffeur them to L.A.”
“She’s pretty.” Addy smirks.
“She’s fake looking.”
“Does she have a boyfriend?”
“No. Yes. I don’t know. What does it matter?” Irritation strains my words.
Addy returns her attention to the plates she’s assembling with fruit, avocado toast, tomatoes, and sprouts. “Oh man … she’s way up under your skin already. This is going to get really good. You should message me with updates.”
“So remind me again why you’re home?”
“Nice diversion, Jake. I told you, Elena didn’t want to miss her friend’s birthday party, so we agreed to wait another day.”
“Oh, yeah, that’s right. So, how are the kids?”
“Jake, you’re such a guy. They’re fine. We’re fine. And don’t think we’re done talking about you.” She slides a plate in front of me. “But first, I’m going to go check on Avery.”
* * *
Avery
“Avery?” Addy knocks on the door.
I open it, wrapped in a white robe that was folded like new next to the shower. “I hope you don’t mind.” I tug at the sash to the robe.
“That’s what it’s there for.” She tucks her long, blond hair behind her ears. It looks a lot healthier than mine.
“Jake made me bathe in the creek. I can’t tell you how amazing that shower felt.” I ease the towel off my head.
“Jake’s got a great personality. He’s such a jokester.”
“Jokester?” I glance at her reflection in the mirror as I work the comb through my hair with cautious strokes. “I’m not sure he’s joking.” Thinking back to last night in the creek, I mentally smile. That was fun, a kind of fun I hadn’t had in years. “Does he joke with you like that? Would he make you bathe in a creek?”
Addy rubs her lips together. “I had a different relationship with Jake years ago, and yes, it was playful.”
I pause the comb. “Different?”
“It was before I married my husband, Quinn. We broke up for awhile, and Jake, who worked for me at the time, was exactly what I needed at that point in my life. He made me feel young and carefree. We had so much fun together.”
She’s good with words, particularly saying everything and nothing at the same time. “So … you were in a relationship with Jake?”
“Yes, a casual one.”
I nod slowly, resuming my combing. “I just got out of a relationship. Anthony wanted to marry me.”
“Oh, I’m sorry. What happened?”
“He lied to me. Said he didn’t like chocolate.”
Addy’s forehead wrinkles. “Did you find his chocolate stash?”
“No. Caught him eating chocolate mousse … in the kitchen … off the naked body of his cook.”
“Ohhh … that’s …”
I shrug. “Pretty much the story of my life.” Whether she wants to hear it or not, I back up the truck and dump
my entire saga onto her. If my sister, Sydney, were here, she’d be my sounding board, therapist, and surgeon to put my life back together. By the time I finish doing my hair, makeup, and filing my nails, Addy has the whole story.
“I’m very sorry, Avery.”
I draw in a deep breath, feeling so much better for finding a sympathetic ear—the shower and well-lit mirror to do my makeup helped too. “Thank you for listening. It’s not the end of the world. I’m just in a rut.”
“Come on, let’s feed you. And don’t let Jake ruffle your feathers. He has his own issues, but I thought when he gave up fighting, he let those go. Apparently, you’ve unintentionally brought a few to the surface again.”
I follow her down the stairs. “Fighting?”
“Yes. He was an underground fighter, ultimate fighter … something like that. I’m not an expert on it, but I watched him send a guy out on a stretcher. Not my thing, but it was kind of …” She glances over her shoulder and winks. “Hot.”
Well great. I’m traveling with someone who has no issue beating another human within inches of their life. If I didn’t feel I could be that next human, I might share Addy’s assessment of Jake’s strength being kind of hot.
“Wait.”
Addy stops at the bottom of the stairs. “Yeah?”
I glance around, seeing no sign of anyone else in earshot. “So you had a fling with Jake, yet he comes here and camps on your property, uses your bathroom, and your husband is okay with it? Does he not know about your past with Jake?”
Her smile is a bit wicked. “Oh, Quinn knows everything. It took a few years before I could even say Jake’s name without him losing his shit. But Jake took over my business, and I still make investments in it. Jake and I share a passion that’s for a greater good—changing the way people look at food. And Quinn loves me, so he deals with my relationship with Jake. I think their relationship has finally hit lukewarm, but I’m guessing that’s where it will peak.”
“Mom?”
Addy looks up the stairs with a smile that I’ve seen a million times before on my sister’s face. It’s the mother smile. “Elena, good morning, sleepyhead.”
A blond-haired girl with olive skin makes her way down the stairs, eyeing me the whole time.
“Elena, this is Avery, Jake’s friend.”
I’m not Jake’s friend. Not by a long shot. Not in this lifetime. Not if he was the last man standing. Nope. Never ever. “Hi, Elena. Nice to meet you. I have a niece that’s just about your size. She likes to surf. What do you like to do?”
