She stood rooted to the spot as Travis came out, steam and hot air billowing around him. “You’re still here?”
“Don’t act so surprised,” she tried the joke out. It was a little funny—it was something that she could definitely work on and with.
“No, I am, I figured you would be long gone, in another room by now.”
Her eyes landed on his bare chest, and she fought not to stare. Clinton had been an older man, and while Travis’ stomach and chest weren’t as muscular as some of the others she had seen working at Wet Wanda’s, he was very good looking to her. On one pectoral, he had a large tattoo. She had seen the ones on his arms before, but this one was different. This was one that he purposely kept hidden from other people, and it could only be seen because he had chosen to take his shirt off in your presence. She took that sentiment and held it close to her heart. It felt good, it felt right.
“You okay?” he asked, his voice held a twinge of laughter as she pulled her eyes away from him.
“I’ve just never seen you without a shirt on before.” That sounded lame even to her own ears.
“I don’t parade around like some people do without one on. I don’t have a lot to show off.”
But to her he did, and she wanted so badly to call it her own. What would he say if she told him that?
Chapter Fourteen
Lying down in the bed together had been one of the most awkward things that either one of them had ever experienced. The tension was so thick that it could have been cut with a knife.
“Is lying in bed with a man always this awkward?” she asked softly as she turned to face Travis, careful not to touch him.
That comment struck him as odd, but he tried to make a joke anyway. “I don’t know, I’ve never been in bed with a man before. Besides, you were married.”
She still was married, but she hated to focus on that. “Yeah, but we never slept in the same bed together.”
His eyebrow rose. “Never?” That was supposed to be one of the major perks of putting a ring on it. The fact that you could go to bed and reach over whenever you wanted to either be close or, if you were feeling the need, fuck her until you fell back asleep.
“Nope.” She shook her head.
The sound of her hair moving against the sheet was loud in the stillness of the room.
“He only came to visit me for, what do prisoners call it? Conjugal visits? Then he would leave as soon as he was done.”
There seemed to be no finesse. He wondered if she had even liked it. Had she ever found pleasure in anything besides the touch of her own hand? He hadn’t realized he’d asked her that question out loud until she answered.
“No, and do you know how much of a disadvantage that puts you at being a stripper?”
The laugh exploded from his body. Sometimes he could almost forget that she had been a stripper. “No.”
She huffed and resituated herself. “The whole time I was there, Wanda would tell me, ‘You must look sexier. Imagine the way you look at your husband. How do you feel when he gives you an orgasm? Give the men that face.’”
He waited patiently for her to continue. He was afraid he would embarrass her if he asked any more questions.
“But I had never had one. When I finally told Jasmine, Jasmine took me to a store just north of here, and we made a ton of purchases. I had to figure it out on my own,” she whispered.
Those words went straight to his gut, and then that tension was back. Travis cleared his throat. “I don’t know what to say to that.”
She laughed. “You don’t have to say anything, I’m just being honest.”
He needed to be honest too. He wanted to be the first guy to do that for her. Being turned down, though, would make things very uncomfortable between the two of them. In the end, he just decided to go for it. If she didn’t want it, she didn’t want it, but if she did, then maybe it would be the tipping point that would make her finally be able to fully trust and believe in him.
One minute, she was lying back against the pillow and Travis was lying beside her. The next minute, Travis had scooted over next to her, his face next to hers. “If I do anything that you don’t like, you tell me.”
She nodded.
“I need to hear you say it.” He didn’t want to scare her, he didn’t want anything at all to be misconstrued, he had to know that she wanted this as much as he did.
“Okay, I trust you.”
Those words were everything that he had always wanted to hear from her. He couldn’t believe how good it felt, how it made his heart race to hear that. They made him feel like motherfucking Superman, but there was still that inner debate—should he get on top of her, should he just stay on his side, facing her? He wished he was as smooth as some of the other members of the club. Fucking hell, Travis, just do whatever Tyler would do, he told himself. Never in his life had he been this nervous with a woman.
Christine must have seen the hesitation in his eyes, the personal battle he was having with himself, because she grabbed his cheeks and pulled his face closer to hers before placing a soft kiss on his lips. It was quick and she pulled back just as quickly.
“I trust you.”
He moved a lot quicker than he meant to, stretching himself over her body, holding himself up with his hands flat on the mattress. “I don’t deserve that trust.”
Christine looped her arms around his neck, burying her fingers in the hair there. “You do. You’re the only one I’ve trusted in such a long time. I want you to understand that. You’re the only person that I’ve been able to be myself with—ever. I’m still trying to figure out who that is, but I feel at peace when I’m with you, I’ve never felt at peace before.”
There were no words for what she had just told him, he didn’t know how to process it, how to tell her that he was himself around her too. More than he’d ever been. In the club, he got lost because he was quiet, because his presence wasn’t demanding. He wasn’t physically intimidating like the rest of them. It was his mind that made him dangerous, the things he could do with words and computer code. His threat was much quieter, but just as effective—not everyone understood that. The ones that did, knew exactly what he did for the club; the ones that didn’t sold him short and saw him as weak. Here, with her in his arms, he felt like the strongest man in the world.
Not being able to take the feelings that were rushing through his body, he dipped his head down, brushing her lips with his. Her reaction was tentative, and he didn’t want to rush it, but he had to taste her. With equally slow movements, he pried her mouth open with the tip of his tongue. She gasped into the kiss, and he wasn’t sure that she liked it until she arched her back, pressing her breasts into his chest. Her nails at the back of his neck dug into the skin there. The bite of pain was welcome as he braced himself up on one arm and used the other to cup her face and tilt her chin so he could use her mouth just the way he wanted to. In this movie between the two of them, he was the director, and he showed her with gentle pressure what he wanted.
“Travis,” she whispered when he broke the kiss. He tilted her chin up, trailing his lips along her jawline, down to her neck.
Christine had never done anything like this before. There had been no finesse when she was with Clinton. There had never been slow kisses, a buildup to anything. It was always he told her to be waiting in bed with her clothes off, and he would come to her, do his business, and be done. He’d kissed her maybe four times in the entire length of time she’d been there. This was entirely new territory for her. His lips and teeth nipped at her neck, his tongue soothing the burn when he put a small amount of pressure behind it.
“You okay?” he asked as his kisses trailed up to her ear.
She shivered when he used his teeth to nip her earlobe, a ribbon of excitement running through her body, causing her to arch against him. “Yeah.” She was afraid to move her hands from around his neck, afraid that she would make the wrong move and this would all be over. It felt too good. His mouth was
now back at her neck, but this time it was at the column of her throat, and he was moving down, closer to her chest. Involuntarily, she felt her nipples harden against the cotton of her T-shirt, and she wanted him to lift it off her body, to show herself to him. She’d only showed herself to the men at Wet Wanda’s. This was something that she had a choice in, and she wanted desperately to show him that she chose him.
Lifting the lids of her eyes so that they were open, she looked down. His dark head was moving even further down her body, and the hand that had been at her jaw was now at the hem of her T-shirt. She’d never realized how big his hands were until one was splayed against her stomach, pushing the fabric up. It came to a stop just below her breast, and he took that moment to look up at her. His eyes were dark, full of desire. She’d never seen anything like it before, and she knew without a doubt that she wanted to see this look from him again; she had to see it again. She would do anything to see this look from him as many times as she could throughout her life. The look was so vulnerable, so full of emotion. In that moment she lost her heart to him. It had been hovering in his hands for a long time—the way he took care of her and the way she trusted him…it had been coming. But it was that bare, vulnerable gaze he gave her that clenched it all.
“Can I take this off?”
The tone of voice he used was quiet and respectful, telling her that if she wasn’t comfortable, it would be okay to tell him so, and he would be fine with that. The level of understanding he had with her was one she had never in her life been given with anyone else. Tears clogged her throat for some unknown reason, but she knew that she didn’t want to ruin this.
“Please.”
The side of his mouth tilted in a cocky grin.
She helped him when he struggled using his one hand, and they both laughed. When his brown eyes swept her body, she fought not to cover herself up with one of her arms. It was difficult, but she didn’t. Insecurities came up from places that she hadn’t counted on.
“What’s wrong? You tensed.”
He was so in-tune with everything involving her that she had to take another moment to thank the God that sent him to her—and she hadn’t thanked God for anything in a while. “What if I’m no good at this?”
A mischievous smile lit up his face. “Then we practice until you feel like you get it right.”
She laughed, the sound loud in the room, but it filled him up with pride. He had successfully put her at ease. Not waiting for her to question anything else, he moved his hand from her stomach to the side of her breast. He watched her eyes as he stroked his thumb over the nub there. She inhaled deeply. “We good?” he asked.
“Yeah.” She breathed harder as he stroked a few more times, each pass faster than the last.
He nodded, dipping his head down, and instead of his thumb, this time, his tongue snaked out. Christine shifted so hard she almost came up off the bed, and he worried that maybe he had done something wrong.
“I’m fine,” she panted. But she really wasn’t. She wanted more and wasn’t sure how to tell him. Everything that Travis was doing was causing a deep ache in the middle of her body, the same kind of ache that she got late at night when she thought of him. She wanted him to take care of it, she was sick of taking care of it herself. She gripped his hair in her fingers and thrust against him. “More,” she whispered.
“What?” he asked, not sure that he had heard her correctly.
“I need more,” she breathed out, the frustration causing her to disentangle her hands from his hair and tangle them in her own, holding it back from her face. She was hot, so hot, and she needed him to make her even hotter. That was the only way she would cool off. “Don’t treat me like I’m gonna break.”
There was an internal war with himself, how much did she mean of the words that she said and how much of it was desire talking? He hesitated.
“I’m serious. I want this to be with you, I want to feel it with you.” She steeled herself against the words she was about to say, they were so unlike her. “Give me the first orgasm I haven’t had at my own fingers.”
Chapter Fifteen
Their deep breathing was the only sound in the room as the gravity of what she said struck him in the chest. He was startled for a moment, and then he realized what she had actually said to him. “Yes, ma’am.”
Christine sucked in a deep breath as he attacked her with an aggression that she hadn’t thought him capable of. Instead of the easy petting, the light tongue against her skin, this time he went after her hard. The stubble on his cheeks rubbed harshly against her skin, and she knew that she would wear that burn like a badge of honor, even if nobody but her could see it. His teeth worried the soft skin around her nipple. She gasped as his tongue soothed it, the slippery warmth of his mouth was a feeling she’d never felt before, and she strained against him.
From where he worked, he tilted his eyes up, watching the look on her face. He noticed that she gripped her hair tightly, almost like she was afraid to touch him. He wondered if she thought she would break the spell if she did. Travis was trying to man up; he knew that once he went this far with her, he wouldn’t ever be able to come back from the precipice. He would go over and he would be done for. When he loved, he loved hard, and he knew that this woman—she could kill him and he’d go easily.
He let go of her skin and slid up her body so that they were on eye level. “You’re gonna kill me, you know this, right?” he asked, a soft grin on his face.
“No, I don’t.” She shook her head, not sure what he meant.
Travis never broke her gaze as he let his hand trail down her stomach and over the only barrier that kept him from touching the part of her he wanted the most.
Her eyes dilated as she got what he meant, and she spread her legs to accommodate him. She felt the tips of his fingers brush against the side of her underwear, and then bare skin, and she sucked in a breath. Without warning, his finger brushed against her clit, and she bucked against him, her eyes closing.
“Nope, Christy, stay with me,” he told her. “Open those eyes.”
This was a lot for her, way more intimate than anything she’d ever participated in before. It was hard for her to open up her emotions like this, but she knew that she needed to. She knew that it wasn’t fair to him to keep herself closed off because that’s what she always did. Opening her eyes was one of the hardest things she had ever done.
“There ya go,” he praised her, gritting his teeth against the feelings coursing through his own body. Her core was hot and wet and it was inviting, and he wanted so badly to shove himself there and put both of them out of their misery, but he kept going back to WWTD? Tyler would make sure that his woman was taken care of and worry about himself later.
“Travis,” she whined as he worked against her, not letting up. The feelings were overwhelming as she tried to process them. She had never allowed anyone else to make her feel this way before, never given herself over to anyone else. It was scary, sexy, and amazing, all at the same time.
He watched her face, not able to look away as he manipulated her pleasure for himself. This wasn’t the kind of relationship where he took just what he wanted. He had been in those, more often than he cared to admit to anyone, but he wanted this more for her. The willingness to make sure she was pleasured in spite of his own needs was something new for him. It was those feelings that kept him here, in this limbo with her. But that wasn’t something to think about now; all he wanted to think about now was getting her there, pushing her over that edge, so that he could be the one who owned her pleasure. Nobody had ever given her this before, and he was going to be the one to own this part of her.
She sucked her bottom lip between her teeth and bit down hard. “Feel good?” he asked, although he knew the answer. Her body was now pliant. When he’d first entered her, it had been tighter.
“Yes!” She strained against him and her brows furrowed. She was reaching, reaching for the spot that was just out of her grasp.
; “What do you need?” he asked, his voice hot against her ear.
“Can you talk to me?” Her face burned with embarrassment even asking the question, but she found with him she wanted the experience to be good. She no longer wanted to wonder why everyone else loved this so much.
He stopped for a nanosecond, presumably to catch his breath and process her request. “Do you know how fucking hot you are to me? I’ve wanted to do this since the first moment I saw you on the stage at Wet Wanda’s. There hasn’t been one day that I have been around you that I haven’t wondered what this would be like.”
“Did I live up to it?” she asked as she ground her body against his hand.
He smirked, biting the edge of her earlobe. “Fucking crushed it.”
It was that little bite of pain that pushed her over. She gasped loudly and went to put her hand over her mouth, the way she had before, but he grabbed it, forcing her to put sounds and words to her pleasure. Neither one of them was sure what she said, what she did, but it was enough to know that they shared the experience.
He turned them so that they faced one another, and they were quiet for a long time until she opened her mouth.
“I have to ask, this has been bothering me for a while, I’m not sure why, but I gotta know.”
He gave her an indulgent smile. “What?”
Heaven Hill Series - Complete Series Page 89
