He paused a moment, the expression on his face that of self-loathing. “It wasn’t until Mom finally stood up for herself that I realized how messed up it all was. I admit I’ll need help. I’ll need to talk to someone, to undo the…the brainwashing, because I’m not sure what else to call it. I’ll need someone to help me remember how to be who I was when we first met, and to be a better person.” He reached out to hug her, then let his arms hang limply at his sides. “Please know how deeply sorry I am for all of this, Sydney. Every last bit—I treated you abhorrently and I’ll never forgive myself for that.”
She flung herself at him and hugged hard. “You called me Sydney,” she whispered.
He laughed softly. “Yeah, I guess I did. I haven’t done that since we dated.” He pulled away to look at her. “I will never, ever be able to apologize enough, though. And the knowledge I have… It will go nowhere. Not now, not ever. I’ve made sure all paper and electronic files were destroyed, Sydney. Everything is gone, and I will make certain it never haunts you again. It’s over.”
She began crying again in earnest and held him tighter. “Thank you, Brett,” she whispered, her eyes closed and rested her head on his shoulder.
When she opened her eyes again, she saw Caleb standing at the end of the black and white tiled corridor. His expression was stony and he shook his head in disgust as he turned to leave.
A fraction of a second later he had rounded the corner and was gone.
Chapter Forty-Six
Sydney pulled away from Brett. “No,” she murmured.
He was plainly confused. “What’s wrong?”
She shook her head and continued to stare down the now-empty hallway.
“Syddie?” Cara asked, coming up beside her.
“What is it?” Theo asked, concerned.
“Caleb,” she managed to croak out. “I… I thought I saw…”
“Oh, shit!” Cara cried out, frantic. “I’ll be right back.” She bolted along the hall and out of sight.
“Who’s Caleb?” Brett asked.
“Hey, Brett, man, we’re all cool now, right?” Theo said, saving his sister from having to answer that question. “I mean, we’re not cool, but we’re better. We really need some alone time with our father and stuff, and shouldn’t you be with your mom right now? If your dad is home when your mom and Mel get to the house…”
“You’re right. I’ve got to get there in case they need backup.” He turned back to Syd. “Hey, are you okay if I maybe call you tomorrow to check on your dad?” he asked hesitantly.
“Of course.”
He frowned. “When your father is doing better, I’d love to sit and talk, the four of us, and explain everything.”
“Sounds like a plan,” Theo said, his voice full of forced cheer. “You better get going!”
Alone at last, he turned to his sister. “Okay, what’s this about Caleb?”
“I thought he was standing right there, no more than ten feet away, and then he was gone. I… I’m sure it was him.” She shook her head in dismay. “Just when things begin to turn around for us, I start to go crazy seeing things,” she tittered.
“Hey now, come on, sis. This hasn’t exactly been a normal day in the life of. A lot of shit happened and you still need to absorb everything that’s gone on. Hell, I do, too. Try to relax.” He settled her into one of the chairs that dotted the floor’s waiting area. “Papa will be out of the hospital soon, and we can go back to leading normal lives again—without fear or limitations. Especially you.”
“You’re right,” she agreed. “My mind… So much going on… It had to have been my mind playing tricks on me.”
Unbelievable.
He crumpled Cara’s letter into a ball and stuffed it into his pocket as he stalked toward his car in the hospital parking lot. When would he ever learn that anything involving Sydney Bennett meant heartbreak for him? He never should have allowed himself to get sucked back into her little games. He dreaded telling Lilly the bad news—she’d had such high hopes for this reunion.
So did I.
The first thing he was going to do when he got back home was burn that goddamn painting.
“Wait!” he heard from behind him. “Caleb, wait!”
He glanced over his shoulder to find a pretty blonde chasing him down.
“Oh, awesome, another fan found me,” he muttered, increasing his pace to a steady jog.
“For God’s sake, man,” she yelled. “I’m wearing heels that I can barely walk in, let alone run in, and I can’t catch up to you. Have some pity!”
While that did make him chuckle, her plea in no way slowed him down.
He heard the steady click-clack of her heels slow to a stop, and she called out, “Caleb Jones, you insufferable, stubborn man. You stop running from me this instant!”
He froze. “What the hell?” He turned to catch a glimpse of her. She was bent over, her hands on her knees, wheezing and trying to catch her breath.
She met his gaze. “Oh, thank God.” She righted her position and raised her index finger, pointing at him. “I don’t care who you think you are, or what bloody band you’re in—even if it is my absolute favorite—you will stay put and you will listen to me for one fucking minute.”
He smirked and, his curiosity piqued, took a couple steps toward this mystery woman. “What’s your deal?” he shouted to her.
She started walking toward him again, much more slowly this time due to a slight limp. “I twisted my frigging ankle because of you,” she said when they were in reasonable talking distance. She shook her head. “The things I do for a friend. I take it you got my note?”
“Your note?” he asked, puzzled. Then the lightbulb clicked on. “You’re Cara?”
“Duh,” she laughed.
The smile left his lips. “Yeah, listen, Cara. Thanks for trying and all, but there’s absolutely nothing to talk about.” He moved to turn away from her.
“Whoa! Whoa, whoa, whoa there, buddy! I did not just run after you like a mad woman in four-inch heels for nothing.” She continued limping her way over to him. “There has been a lot—and, by a lot, I mean a shit-ton—of stuff going on with Syd for a year now. All hell broke loose today… Actually, it’s more like all hell broke loose twenty minutes ago. If there was ever a good time for you to show up, it would be now.”
His shoulders slumped in resignation. “I really do appreciate you trying to help smooth things over with me and Syd. Really, I do.” The next words he spoke pained him to the core. “But Syd and I, we’re finished, and there’s no going back.”
“Don’t say that.”
He faced her. “Cara, it’s true. Look, I don’t even know you, but I see how much Sydney loves you. I’m not so sure how happy she’d be with you trying to convince me to go in there and face her at the moment. She’s with Brett. She chose Brett. She didn’t choose me, and it is what it is. So please, just let me go home.”
She hobbled closer to him and put her hands on his arm, giving a gentle squeeze. “No, but that’s the thing, Caleb. It is not what you think it is. She loves you, Caleb.”
“Bullshit,” he said, anger and hurt bubbling up inside him. “She loves me so much, that’s why she was cozied up to her fiancé in there, right? Because she loves me oh so much? Don’t even try to sell me that line. I won’t buy it anymore.”
“She does,” Cara interjected. “She does love you more than anything…but she couldn’t do anything about it. Her hands were tied, I swear.”
“And what the hell is that supposed to mean?”
“It means that with everything that went down tonight, she’s ready to talk to you, and since you came all this way, maybe you could suck it up, buttercup, and let her try to explain. Even if you only give her a couple minutes,” she pleaded.
“Shit,” he muttered as he ran a hand through his hair. He was torn. He had no idea if he should bother going back inside to talk to Sydney. He anticipated the heartache he’d undoubtedly have to deal with—yet again—
but at the same time, he owed it to himself to give her a chance to enlighten him as to what the fuck was going on. All along he’d said he wanted the truth, that he wanted answers and closure, and this was his opportunity to get just that.
He let out a little growl. “Fine, I’ll give her five minutes, but that’s it.”
Cara squealed like a four-year-old on Christmas morning and threw her arms around Caleb’s neck, hugging him hard. “Oh my gosh, you’re as awesome as she always said you were. This is going to be great!”
“Yeah, don’t get your hopes up, Cara. All I said was that I would listen to her.” He took her arm and helped her stagger across the parking lot, back toward the hospital. “I can’t even imagine how her fiancé would react to me being there.”
She laughed, and to Caleb’s ears it was the sound of pure, unfiltered joy. She beamed up at him. “Oh, you mean ex-fiancé.” She winked, and led a stunned, slack-jawed Caleb into the building.
Chapter Forty-Seven
Syd sat in the waiting room chair her brother had settled her into, bouncing her leg up and down at a furious pace, her nerves getting the better of her. She glanced toward the hall that led to the elevators, anxiously waiting for Cara to come back. Then she turned her attention toward her father’s room, waiting for Theo to come back. He had gone to check on Papa one last time for the night when a nurse came around and informed them visiting hours were coming to an end.
Worried that they would be told to leave right when Cara was returning, Theo had used his charms on the pretty nurse and asked her if they could stay a little bit longer, and she acquiesced. Her consent came with a firm deadline, though—they had fifteen minutes, and not a moment longer.
Syd looked down the hallways, looked down at her hands, looked out of the window—she was unable to sit still and she couldn’t stand the waiting. If Cara had managed to find Caleb what on earth she would say to him—if he would even bother talking to her?
Part of her was still unconvinced she wasn’t going bonkers and, in fact, hadn’t seen him at all, and the more and more the clock ticked on silently, she was further convinced it was the latter. She’d probably sent her friend out on a wild goose chase, and she’d never let her live it down.
Theo was suddenly in front of her, and placed both hands on her knees to stop the incessant bouncing. Her eyes flicked up to meet his. “How’s Papa?”
“Sound asleep. The nurse said she’d call us if there were any problems, but he’s strong and she doesn’t anticipate any. We can come back and see him first thing in the morning.”
Syd nodded. “Okay.” She chewed on a fingernail, and her legs became active once again.
“Oh my God, please stop with the bouncing,” Theo begged. “You’re shaking the whole floor and it’s driving me crazy.”
“Yeah, sorry,” she answered absently. She got out of the chair and began the pace the small room.
“Gah!” he cried out, standing in front of her and resting his hands on her shoulders. “Calm. Yourself.” He gave her a little squeeze. “You must calm yourself.”
“But I can’t, Theo. I mean, what if he really is here, and Cara found him and he’s coming back here right now? What if he doesn’t want to hear what I have to say, or he doesn’t care and he’s mad at me and just wants to see me tormented as I try to make him understand?” Her green eyes went wide and she took a breath before continuing her steady rambling. “What if the only reason he’s coming back is to give me shit for everything that happened and that I had to tell him, and oh my God, I don’t think I could handle that, Theo. I mean, not that I don’t deserve it but…”
Theo clamped a hand over her mouth, putting an end to her hyperactive chatter. He grinned and spun her around so she was facing Cara—and Caleb. Cara practically pranced alongside him as they walked the last few feet to the sitting area. She was positively bursting with excitement.
She limped over to Theo and latched onto his arm, leading him away. “Come on, come on, let’s get out of here.”
“You know, the way you keep dragging me around is going to give a boy a complex,” he joked, following her. “Hey, what happened to you?”
“Nothing,” she answered. “I twisted my ankle, no biggie. Let’s go!”
Their conversation continued as they walked down the hall and around the corner, until the words finally faded, leaving Syd and Caleb in silence. He gazed at her—she had no idea if he hated her or was thrilled to see her. His expression was neutral. She couldn’t move, couldn’t speak—couldn’t do anything except stare at the man she loved and try so hard not to collapse in a mess of incoherent sobs and garbled choking sounds in front of him.
He hadn’t said a word, and she didn’t know what to do. “So, I…uh…” she began.
“How’s your dad?” he asked.
She gazed into his blue eyes, thankful she didn’t have to delve into the difficult stuff right off the bat. “He’s holding up,” she answered, her voice hardly more than a whisper. “He, uh, he had a heart attack, but the doctor thinks he’ll recover and be okay.”
Caleb nodded. “That’s good.”
“It is.” She hesitated. “Um, Caleb…”
“Why don’t we sit?” he asked softly.
She nodded and followed his lead, sitting side by side. She had never been so nervous in her entire life.
“Why didn’t you tell me you were engaged?” he asked, getting right to the point.
“Oh, God,” she sobbed instantly, covering her face. “Oh, God, I’m so sorry, Caleb. You have no idea what all this has done to me.”
“Yeah, I ‘m pretty sure I do, actually,” he retorted, his voice hard.
I deserved that.
He pulled her hands away from her face. “Syd, look at me.” Only when she met his eyes did he continue. “I loved you, Syd. What happened…it hurt me like hell. I deserve some honest answers.”
He loved me. Past tense.
“I’m not even sure where to start.”
“How about from where it all began? And don’t leave anything out.”
She nodded and spoke in a whisper. “I’ve been engaged since September of last year.” The tension was palpable now and she was unable to meet his gaze, instead focusing her attention on the tiled floor. If she looked into those eyes—the eyes that used to be filled with such love for her—she wasn’t sure she’d be able to go on. “I… I never wanted to be engaged. I don’t love Brett. I couldn’t imagine a life with him. And… And then I met you, Caleb, and everything changed.”
“Hang on, back up a little there, Syd. If you never wanted to marry him, why did you accept his proposal?” he asked. “What could possibly drive someone to marry a man they don’t love…? And give up someone they profess to love? I know his family is rich as fuck, and you said yourself the restaurants weren’t doing all that awesome. Were you with him for the money?” He tensed, and prayed it wasn’t for that reason. Because if it was…was that why she said she loved him, too? Because of his bank account?
“What? Oh, God no! I’m not that shallow, how could you even suggest that?”
He frowned. “Well, you were fucking me while you were engaged to another man. What do you expect me to think?”
“I deserved that,” she whispered.
No you don’t.
God damn it all to hell. Here she was, trying to explain everything to him, and all he wanted to do was kiss her.
“It was never money-related or anything. I was blackmailed into it, Caleb. Brett dug up some information about my father, and if it got out he would have gotten in trouble and would have been sent back to Greece. My family,” she murmured. “It would have been torn apart.” She gazed up at him. “I couldn’t lose another parent, Caleb. I couldn’t lose anyone else. But in the end I lost someone anyhow. Someone I love very much.”
He remained quiet, waiting for her to continue.
She took a deep, shuddery breath and got to her feet. “My father…the stress of all this has put him in the h
ospital. Do you really believe I wanted any of this to happen? I was a horrible, wretched person who lied time after time to the man I had fallen deeply and unequivocally in love with, all because I was happy and selfish and didn’t want to give it up.” She began to cry again. “Now my father is lying in the hospital, hooked up to God knows how many machines, and you’re sitting there looking at me like you hate me, and everything has gone to shit.”
“I’m not quite sure what happened, Syd,” he said, getting up to stand in front of her. “Everything you’re saying, it’s so disjointed and I can’t make heads or tails of it yet. But you have to believe one thing,” he said, leaning closer to her and brushing his lips on hers. “I could never hate you.”
She broke down in a torrent of tears and collapsed against him. “But you should hate me,” she rasped. “What I did to you…”
“Was every bit as bad as what I was doing to myself,” he interrupted. “Syd, you tried to push me away so many times I’ve lost count. Did I ever listen? No. I kept refusing to see that something was so evidently wrong.” He wrapped his arms around her, rubbing her back in soft circles, trying to help her get hold of herself. “Was the way the situation was handled right? No, absolutely not. But fact of the matter is this—I’m here now, Syd, and I want to understand.”
She peered up at him through tear-dotted lashes. “Why did you even come here, anyhow?” she asked, her voice soft.
He grinned. “I received a little package from your friend Cara.”
Her green eyes widened in surprise. “What? What did she send you?”
He reached into his pocket and pulled out the letter. “This,” he said, holding it up. “And your painting of me.”
“She… You… The painting,” she stammered, her face beet red. “I can’t believe she sent that to you!” She took a step back and plucked the paper from of his hands. She smoothed it out and scanned it, her eyes welling up as read.
“Excuse me,” the pretty little brunette nurse interrupted. “I’m sorry, it looks like you’re in the middle of something, but visiting hours were over nearly twenty minutes ago. You have to head out now.”
Little White Lie Page 28
