by Gina Ardito
“You’re everything to me, Lucie. Always have been. I’ve just been too stupid to realize it until now.”
“That’s a shame,” I said. “Because now, it’s too late.”
Chapter 9
Ariana
Stop it! I’m not your girl!
Mom’s shout woke me up. Who was she yelling at? I slipped off the cot and tiptoed to the office door. The restaurant was quiet, all the staff gone except for the three of us: me, Mom, and Chef Colin. I stayed in the office, the door cracked open enough for me to hear what they talked about without them seeing me.
I listened to everything Chef Colin said, and I was so proud of him. He apologized for what he’d said and told her he wanted to start over. He even called himself a jerk—although, technically, Mom used the name first.
Still...
He was perfect. Mom was sure to forgive him now. Hooray! Soon, he and Mom would get married and dance off into a beautiful life.
Until I heard Mom say he was too late. No!
I was about to run out there and tell her she was wrong when I heard him say, “It’s never too late, Lucie. You just need time.”
Told ya. Prince material. Ready to fight for the princess.
But one thing I’d learned from all the time I spent watching Aladdin and The Little Mermaid and even Beauty and the Beast, was that the princess had to be ready to fight for her prince, too.
And I wasn’t really sure Mom was one hundred percent princess material. Yet. But she would be. Look how well I’d done with Prince Colin. Princess Lucie would be a piece of cake.
Lucinda
On the third Sunday in April, Colin closed the restaurant to patrons so the staff could throw a farewell party for Sidney, who would officially leave New York early Monday morning. I still couldn’t believe he would be gone from my life so soon. Oh, sure, he’d still be a part of my life via phone and cards and email, but I wouldn’t be able to see him at a moment’s notice. I wouldn’t hear his laugh in the G & O anymore. For his sake and for Ariana’s, I put on my game face for the afternoon.
My daughter had me puzzled. Maybe all the recent late bedtimes had wreaked havoc with her behavior. She was a whirling dervish of questions all morning. Odd questions. Like, “Have you ever apologized for something but the person wouldn’t accept your apology?” and “What’s the best thing anyone’s ever done for you?” and “What was the happiest day in your life?”
After about thirty minutes, I finally asked, “What’s with all the questions?”
“Homework,” she said. “I have to interview someone special to me.”
How sweet. “You should interview Grandpa,” I advised. “After all, this will probably be your last chance to talk to him for a while.”
She seemed to consider that suggestion, but eventually shook her head. “This isn’t a one-day project. I’ll probably be asking you questions for a while.”
Terrific.
Now, inside the G & O, she hovered around Colin while I stayed as far away from him as I could without having to step outside. Laughter spilled from one corner, including Sidney’s distinctive whinny. I sipped a bottle of water and fussed with the trays of appetizers laid out across the bar.
Someone had switched the music system from the usual romantic instrumental songs, meant to enhance the restaurant’s ambience, to raucous dance pop—the kind of stuff I danced to in my carefree youth.
Ariana scampered over and grabbed my hand. “Dance with me.”
“No, baby,” I told her while she continued to drag me into the middle of the open floor. “I can’t. I’m still hurting a little, remember?”
Disappointment fell over her face, but in the flap of a butterfly’s wing, she brightened. “That’s okay.” Craning her body around me, she yelled, “Jordan? Play a slow song, okay?”
Jordan, hovering near the sound system in front of the cloak room, flashed a thumbs-up. The heavy drums and techno beat faded to a lone piano.
“Better?” Ari wrapped her arms around my waist, and I had no choice but to slow dance around the room with her while everyone watched.
After a few turns on the floor, she called out, “Grandpa? Come dance with us.”
Sidney left his circle of friends and wrapped one arm around each of us, and we moved in an awkward graceless dance until our little ringleader bent outside our group one last time. “Chef Colin, we need you.”
We did? I didn’t get a chance to blink before I found Colin making our trio into a quartet.
“This isn’t working,” Ari announced with disdain. “Grandpa, sweep me away like Belle and the Beast.”
Next thing I knew, I was locked in Colin’s embrace while Sidney waltzed off with my daughter.
“I think,” I said to Colin, “I was just outmaneuvered by an eight-year-old.”
His chuckles washed over me like a warm, refreshing sea breeze. “At least, you’ve got company.”
“You weren’t in on this?”
“God, no. I’m as much a victim as you are.”
A smile played around his lips and I shook my head. “Nice try. I almost believed you that time.”
“I swear to you, I had nothing to do with this.”
“Oh, yeah? Then, why are you smiling?”
“Actually, I was reliving a memory. Something your daughter asked me about a while back. Do you remember the lifeguard challenge?”
The lifeguard challenge. “Ariana asked about that? I didn’t even know she knew about it.”
“She didn’t, per se. She asked how I met you.”
Probably for that interview for school, I guessed.
Each year, a few weeks before the official beginning of summer on Memorial Day, the local hotels and condos held competitions to hire lifeguards for their pools and private beaches. Volunteers were supposed to portray drowning victims. I’d been paired with Colin. Despite the freezing water, I had played my part admirably, swimming out a few yards, faking a cramp, waving for help as I sank beneath the waves. He’d done well with the rescue until he brought me to the shore. Lying soaking wet on the beach towel, I shivered from the blast of frigid early May air, and he’d covered my body with his and kissed me. Not just a quick peck, either, but a full-out hot and heavy kiss full of salt, a little sand, and lots of passion that heated my blood to inferno levels. I practically melted into the beach towel with that first kiss. The hotel manager hadn’t been quite so impressed with Colin’s lifesaving abilities and tossed us both out of the tryouts then and there.
Recalling that moment now, I snorted a laugh. “The one time you lost at something.”
“You were mad at me then, too.”
“I didn’t even know you and suddenly, I was branded a troublemaker with you,” I reminded him sharply. I let the anger melt beneath the brilliance of his smile. “But I got over it. You always had a way of making me laugh so I forgot what upset me in the first place.”
“I don’t suppose that would work this time, huh?”
The pain hit me in the chest like a cannonball. “A thousand circus clowns wouldn’t be enough this time. Now let me go, please.”
He removed his hold on me, his reluctance obvious. I could feel the heat of his hand a hair’s breadth from the small of my back. “I’m sorry, Lucie. I can’t seem to say it often enough or sincere enough for you to believe me, but if I could do that summer over again, I’d do things differently, I swear.”
I’d never before heard him sound so lost. I glanced up and caught an unfamiliar expression in his eyes, a vulnerability the cocky young man I used to know would never show. My breath caught in my throat. What if my mother was right? Had Colin changed? I shook my head at my own crazy thoughts. It didn’t matter.
“One thing I’ve learned,” I told him. “You can’t change the past, no matter how much you want to.” I turned and left the dance floor to find Sidney. Another crack had just formed in my shell.
I found Maxie first. Or, rather, she found me.
“Come do a shot w
ith us,” she slurred, pulling me toward the bar.
I stiffened at once. Alcohol fumes wafted off her breath and skin, fiery enough to burn my retinas.
“No, thanks.”
When I tried to pull away, she threw an arm around my neck. “Come on. Just one. In Sidney’s honor.”
The memories flooded thick and fast, and I struggled against the panic. My heartbeat kicked into overdrive, and my palms dampened with sweat. I trembled until those trembles intensified to shudders. My vision grayed around the edges, and I whipped around, almost blinded, seeking escape, only to barrel face-first into a rock solid chest.
“Maxie, honey, relax,” Colin said smoothly, tossing an arm around her. “Lucie’s a lightweight in the drinks department. Always has been. She’s certainly not going to get blitzed with her daughter here. Let’s you and I get her a bottled water, and we’ll all toast Sidney together.”
Maxie removed her grip on me and linked an arm around Colin’s waist. “You got it, boss man.”
My world came into focus in small increments, beginning with the gradual fading of my tremors and continuing onto my eyesight. Although, maybe not all the way, because I could’ve sworn I saw Colin wink at me before he strolled away with the blowsy bartender.
“You okay?”
The panic whipped up again, and I whirled, my hands clutched at my chest only to find Sidney behind me. I exhaled, letting light back into my dark places. “Yes, I’m fine. Thanks for sending Colin over.”
“I didn’t. He spotted Maxie mauling you and raced here before I could put down my drink.”
I blinked. “He did?”
Sidney grinned. “He did.” Placing my hands together, he cupped them between his. “Lucie, I made a lot of mistakes in my lifetime. And God knows what I did to make my son into a monster...”
I shook my head. “You’re not responsib—”
“Let me finish. I don’t know what happened to Rob. He was a good boy. You remember, don’t you?”
A sad smile touched my lips as I nodded. I did remember the good Rob, the one who swapped lunches with me in elementary school and taught me how to bait my own hook when fishing and took me to senior prom. I remembered the secrets we shared and the years of laughter.
“Hold onto those memories,” Sidney said. “Set the uglier ones free. The bad Rob is gone. He can’t hurt you ever again. You and Ariana are both safe. Don’t let what he became color the rest of your life. Learn to forgive and love again.”
He kissed my forehead and disappeared into the crowd.
When I turned toward the bar again, Colin had an unopened bottle of water in his hand, and my daughter skipped along at his side, chattering like a monkey. For his part, he listened to her and answered whatever silly questions she asked. He had shown so much patience with her, and I was grateful. Aside from Sidney, Ariana had no experience with gentle men and I often feared what, if anything, she remembered about her father and his viciousness.
Once he and she were within arm’s reach, Colin handed me the water bottle. “You okay?”
I guzzled half the contents, wiped my mouth on a cocktail napkin, and nodded. “I am now, yeah. Thanks.”
He lifted one shoulder, a half-shrug. “Sorry about Maxie. She’s had a few too many.” His gaze roamed the crowd. “A lot of people here have. Saying goodbye to the old man isn’t easy, is it?”
A nostalgic smile quirked my lips. “No. He’s been a really great boss. You’ve got your work cut out for you if you want to be better.”
“I’d settle for being as good,” he replied. “I told Morgan to close up the bar now and get some coffee going.”
Beneath the dim overhead lighting, his eyes crinkled, and all of a sudden, I was nineteen again, lying on a beach towel, looking into the amused face of the young man who had possessed my heart with one kiss. One long, hot, salty kiss that made my knees knock even in memory.
“I...umm...I should get Ari home,” I managed to say. “We’ve both got school tomorrow. And for me, that means finals.” I forced a flippant veneer. “So I should probably crack open a book for a while and hope some of what I read tonight sticks in my gray matter ‘til then.”
“I’ll take you home.”
Panic reared its ugly head again. I did not want to be alone with him now. Not after everything that had just transpired between us. Ari’s bizarre questions from this morning, the reminder of how he and I first met, and Maxie’s boozy assault twisted my emotions into knots. Thank God I had a backup plan.
“No, thanks. Linda already offered to drop us off. Her house is only a mile or so from mine.” I grabbed Ari’s hand before Colin could say anything else. “Come on, doodle. Let’s go say our goodbyes to Grandpa and wish him luck.”
I only hoped I could make it out of here without collapsing into a puddle of tears.
Chapter 10
Lucinda
Late Monday morning, I was about to dash for the bus to school when someone knocked on the front door. With Mom already at work and Ari in school, it didn’t take a detective to figure out who I’d find on my stoop. I let Colin inside and ushered him into the kitchen before I began my interrogation. “What are you doing here?”
“I’m going to drive you to class.”
I snorted a laugh. “No, you’re not.”
“Yes, I am. That was our agreement. That you wouldn’t take the bus anymore.”
“No.” I folded my arms over my chest. “We agreed you would drive me to and from work. School never entered into our discussion.” A sudden thought struck me, and I blurted, “How’d you know I had class in an hour anyway?”
“Your mom gave me your schedule. Apparently, she sees things my way.”
She would. After all, she’d already made it plain she hated my taking the bus. I shook my head at both of them. “She shouldn’t have done that.”
Shifting his weight to one hip, he leaned against my counter. “I disagree. What’s the big deal? I have the time and the means. Why can’t you just say ‘thank you’ like a normal person?”
Because I wasn’t a normal person. I hadn’t been normal since that night. Then and there, I decided the time had come to bare myself to this man. Literally and figuratively. If I ever expected him to back off and give me breathing room, I had to make him understand why I was the way I was.
I pointed to the dinette table and the chair closest to where he stood now. “Sit. We need to talk. Without anyone else around.”
“Oh, sure,” he scoffed. “Whenever I wanted to talk to you alone, you’d find something to do.” He pitched his voice higher, I suppose, to imitate me. “‘What are tonight’s specials?’” Switching back to his normal voice with a hint of sarcasm, he remarked. “Sound familiar?”
“Please, Colin. This is important. I want to tell you about Rob.”
He sat. The caustic Colin disappeared, replaced with a solemn expression and a tone to match. “Okay. Shoot.”
I sank into the seat across from him and folded my hands on the tabletop. “To tell you this, I have to discuss what happened that Labor Day. I don’t want you to interrupt or try to give me your side, okay? This is really hard for me. My mom and Sidney know a lot of what I’m about to tell you, but no one knows the whole story. Except me. And soon...you. Can you handle that, Colin? Because some of it is brutal and ugly. If hearing this is going to upset you or make you see me differently, that’s something we’ll both have to deal with. Got it?”
He nodded.
On a deep breath, I allowed my mind to travel the dark and lonely road of my past. “That Labor Day weekend is emblazoned in my memory: every word you said, every look you gave me.” His gaze traveled past me toward the windows. Seeking escape? Too bad. If I could live through that day and all that transpired after that day, so could he. “Look at me, Colin. I need to see you understand everything I tell you.”
Once he complied, I went on. “It was the last official hurrah of summer out here. You’d already gone away to school, but you came hom
e for that weekend. We were at the beach. I reminded you that you hadn’t given me your school address yet so I could send you packages, and that’s when you said it. ‘You don’t need to send me anything. We’re done.’”
He had the grace to flush and suck in a sharp breath. I don’t know whether he truly remembered what he said—and how coldly he’d said it—or I’d just reminded him, but at least he’d responded with an appropriate reaction.
“You asked me what I had expected. Did I think you and I were going to keep this romance going? That someone like me belonged with someone like you? Because, after all, I was a nobody. I would always be a nobody. No amount of schooling would erase the fact that I was the daughter of a maid. That I’d be better off forgetting school and continuing the tradition my mother had begun for me: making beds and scrubbing toilets. Then you walked off with some other girl, leaving me alone on the beach.” My voice cracked on the humiliation, and I dipped my head, shielding my face behind my hair while I regathered my twisting emotions. Which was ridiculous, considering the worst was still to come. “I walked home. I had no money, no way to call anyone.”
Looking up at him again, I gave him a shaky smile. “Bikinis don’t have pockets, you know. Eight miles on the highway. In my bathing suit and flip-flops with nothing but my towel to protect me from wolf whistles and the honks of oncoming traffic. By the time I got home, it was dark, my feet and ankles were cut from the rocks the traffic kicked up at me, I was sunburned and dehydrated. I crawled into bed and cried myself to sleep. The next day, Rob came over, took one look at me and knew. He told me he’d warned me this would happen, that I’d been crazy to even dream that someone like you could ever be interested in someone like me. Then he said that no one would ever love me the way he did. That we belonged together. I would never do better than him. I believed him. He was my best friend. We’d known each other since elementary school, gone to prom together. Dating seemed the natural next step.”
