by Beau Brown
His shoulders were bunched and his brows pulled tight. “You work for me. You look after my child. I can’t have you falling asleep when you’re supposed to be watching him, just because you were out drinking and screwing all night.”
My face flushed and I scrunched my face into a scowl. “I had two drinks and nobody was screwing anybody. Jesus, it was our first date. Regardless of what you seem to think of me, I’m not a slut. I barely know Tex. I’m not going to sleep with him yet.”
“Yet?”
I lifted my chin. “None of this is your business.”
He turned his back on me, raking a hand through his hair as he sucked in a big breath and released it slowly. When he spoke his voice was stiff. “You should get to bed.”
“You just love bossing people around, don’t you?”
He faced me, and his jaw was tense. “I’m trying to warn you that I’m not myself at the moment.”
I swallowed. “Meaning what?”
He ran his gaze over me. “Meaning I’m not necessarily thinkin’ straight, Hunter.”
The hungry look in his eyes wasn’t subtle, and a little thrill went through me. He wanted me. My entire body flushed with heat as I began to catch on to why he was acting so strange. The sexually starved part of me wanted to push him and see if I could get him to make a move on me. But the rational side of me knew better. I’d never been an omega who just mated anybody who wanted me, and I didn’t need to start being that person now.
“Fine.” I forced myself to move out of the kitchen and away from him. I could feel his eyes burning into my back as I ascended the stairs. By the time I reached my room, I was trembling from the strain of not giving into my baser instincts.
I knew he probably wanted me because I was in heat. He couldn’t help himself. He was simply responding to his instincts. What worried me far more was that I didn’t think my desire for him was solely based on where I was in my sexual cycle. I had a sinking feeling that I was developing actual feelings for the ill-tempered alpha who owned this damn ranch.
Chapter Six
Jake
I guess acting like a damn fool around Hunter was becoming a habit.
I’d behaved like a jealous boyfriend by confronting the two of them when they got home. I’d managed to work myself up before they got back by fixating on what Hunter and Tex might be doing on their date. The image of them sleeping together had been on a loop inside my head, and when I’d heard Hunter’s key in the lock, I’d just lost my temper.
My eyelids were like sandpaper when I walked into the kitchen. Hunter had the table set already, and as I sat at the table, he approached with a plate piled high with hashed browns, bacon and fried eggs. I avoided his gaze as I took my dish, feeling like an idiot because of my behavior last night.
He hovered by the stove for a few minutes as I ate, and then he approached slowly, looking as if he was heading toward a firing squad. He sat at the table and I finally looked up and met his wary gaze. “I think we need to talk.” His voice was hushed.
I stopped eating and set my fork down. “Look, I’m sorry about last night.”
His lips parted in surprise. “You are?”
I scowled. “Of course I am. I’m embarrassed as hell.” I sighed. “I was way out of line.”
Relief washed over his tense features. “I’m glad to hear you say that.”
“I think the stress of this place is getting to me.” I hoped he’d buy my explanation and that we could just drop the subject. “That’s not really a good excuse. But it’s the only one I have.” Or the only one I’m willing to admit.
“I understand,” he said softly.
My chest tightened at his empathetic tone. He had an amazing ability to put others at ease. There was an inherent kindness and gentleness about him that seemed to soothe me. “It won’t happen again.”
“I take my job watching over Avery seriously. I hope you know that.”
“I do. Of course I do.” I sighed. “And Tex is a good guy. I have no real reason for being a jerk about you going on a date with him.”
He leaned back in his chair, his gaze was hard to read. “He seems nice.”
I concentrated on my breakfast for a moment, and then I glanced up. “Are you going to see him again?”
He shrugged. “Probably.”
I nodded and clenched my teeth against the perplexing irritation that clawed at me. “Sounds great,” I forced myself to say.
“My cycle should be over in a few days. I’m sure you’ll feel better then.” He sounded matter of fact; as if the only reason I could be interested in him was because he was in heat.
I felt ashamed since I’d basically made him feel that way. I pushed the last of my bacon into my mouth and stood. “Duty calls.”
He watched me with that same enigmatic expression. “I’ll have lunch ready at twelve.”
“Okay.” I left the house and headed toward the barn. I needed to clear my head of all the confusing thoughts that were poking at me. I saddled up my favorite mare and I headed out across the property.
The scent of damp hay and earth filled my nostrils as I eyed the dark clouds hovering in the distance. It looked like we were in for a summer thunderstorm. That was probably a good thing, seeing as the land was parched and could use all the moisture it could get. I rode for a couple of hours, listening to the hawks overhead and whispering yellow grass that surrounded me.
My mind kept wandering back to Hunter. No matter how many times I pushed thoughts of him away, they seeped back in. He’d only been with Avery and me a little over two weeks, but I had a hard time remembering when he hadn’t been around. He’d fit into our little home nicely, in spite of me not being terribly welcoming. There was no question Avery adored him. He lit up like a Christmas tree whenever Hunter was around. Even I had to admit, when Hunter walked in the room, my pulse sped up. And regardless of what I’d let Hunter believe, it wasn’t just because he was in heat.
By the time I got back to the ranch, Tex was lying on the ground, working on the tractor. He gave me a grumpy glance and went back to tightening things with a wrench. I approached and squatted down next to him.
“I owe you an apology, Tex.” My voice was gruff. I hated apologizing, but I knew it was the right thing to do. Tex wasn’t just my employee, he was also my friend.
He flicked his surprised gaze to mine. “Holy shit. Am I dreamin’?”
“Is that your way of saying I never apologize?”
“Well let’s just say humility isn’t what you’re known for around these parts.”
I exhaled roughly. “Point taken.” I stood with a grunt.
He studied me and then he crawled out from under the machine. Brushing off his rear end, he met my gaze. “Can I be frank with you?”
I winced. “Oh, Lord.”
He laughed. “Hey, someone needs to talk some damn sense into you.”
I crossed my arms. “Say what you need to say.”
He leaned against the tractor. “You want that omega for yourself.” I opened my mouth to speak and he interrupted me. “Now don’t go bothering to deny it. I’ll call bullshit on you, boss. You want him and there’s no use pretending you don’t.”
I scowled. “You’re wrong.”
“No I’m not.”
“He’s in heat. That’s all.”
He rolled his eyes. “You have half a dozen omegas working on this ranch at any given time. I ain’t never seen you look at them the way you do Hunter, whether they were in full heat or not.”
I hung my head, feeling confused.
“If the only reason you’re not acting on anything is because of what happened with his dad, you’re a fool. He’s special. He’s got a quality about him you’ll probably never find again. Sure as hell not all the way out here. He even likes living on a ranch. He loves your kid. I don’t know what else it is you think you need in a mate.”
“I thought you were interested in him. Why the heck are you trying to shove him off on me?”
My face warmed. “He’s not into me.”
Tex laughed. “Jesus, you really don’t even know what to look for anymore.” He shook his head. “He can’t keep his eyes off you. Hell, we spent half our date talking about you. It was hugely annoying, truth be told.”
A weird little nudge of excitement nipped at me. “Why would he be into me? I’ve been a jerk to him ninety percent of the time he’s been here.”
His lips twitched. “You got me. Maybe he has bad taste in alphas. I mean, he must, if he’d prefer you over me.”
“Nah. You’re crazy.” I glanced back toward the house.
“Jake.” His voice softened. “I know you like him.”
I dropped my chin to my chest and sighed. “I don’t have any idea what I feel.”
“That’s because you’re fighting your instincts so hard.” He narrowed his eyes. “But if you still think he’s not good enough for you, on account of what his dad did, then don’t you dare start anything with him. You’d break his heart. I’m not stepping aside so that you can hurt the guy.”
Confusion filled me, and I clenched my jaw. “I haven’t even thought of taking an omega in five years. I’m too old, Tex. He isn’t going to want someone like me.”
He leaned toward me. “He already wants you.”
“I… I basically told him he wasn’t good enough for me.” My face flushed and I dropped my gaze.
“Do you really think that?”
I lifted one shoulder. “I thought I did.” I met his gaze. “But that thing you said about Avery being treated poorly because of anything I did, kind of hit home.”
“Good.” His tone was sharp. “That was my intention.”
I pulled my hat off and raked my hands through my hair. “He says he’s not interested in having babies or an alpha of his own.”
“I’d lay money he thinks no one wants him for that. Look how you felt at first. He’s probably had a lifetime of alphas saying that shit to him.”
I closed my eyes, feeling like an ass. When I opened my eyes Tex had a little smile on his face. “What are you smiling at?”
“I can’t believe you’re even listening to me. I expected you to tell me to fuck off. You must really like him.”
“I don’t know what I feel. I only know I’m drawn to him.” I sighed. “But it might just be lust.”
“I doubt it.”
I put my hat back on. “You’re assuming an awful lot about his feelings.”
“I’m just telling you what I see.”
“For all I know you’re nuts.” Anxiety filled my gut. “He was pretty clear about not wanting an alpha.”
“Jesus, you’re both so stubborn you’ll probably be alone for the rest of your lives.”
“Maybe that’s okay with me.”
He sighed. “Just think about what I’ve said. If you ever toyed with the idea of bringing another omega into your life, Hunter is a pretty amazing candidate.”
“Now you’ve got me even more confused,” I grumbled, moving toward the barn. “I’ve got work to do. I can’t just stand around talking about feelings all day.”
“Stuuubornnnn.”
I ignored him and went to greet a couple of ranch hands who’d just arrived. I spent the next part of the day re-roofing half of the barn with their help. As lunch time neared, I climbed down off the rambling building and drank some cool water. The storm clouds had passed us by without dropping any rain after all, and the sun was now poking out from behind clouds that looked like puffy cotton balls.
I glanced over and saw Hunter and Avery coming down the steps of the house. Hunter held Avery’s hand as they headed toward us. My heart warmed watching the two of them together. Hunter listened attentively to Avery as the boy talked and bounced around excitedly. Hunter made taking care of Avery look effortless, while I’d pretty much always acted like it was a huge burden.
When they were just a few feet from us, Hunter smiled at Tex, causing my gut to churn. That now familiar jealousy rose in my chest, but I forced it down. I noticed Hunter carried a picnic basket as they came closer.
“Hi, Papa.” Avery looked nervous and he glanced up at Hunter, as if needing emotional support.
“Go ahead and ask him, Avery,” Hunter nudged gently.
Avery met my gaze timidly. “Papa, we… we wondered if… if you’d want to have a picnic with us.” His voice was so soft I almost couldn’t hear him.
I felt bad studying my son’s pale face. It was obvious he expected me to shoot down his idea. Of course he did, I seemed to always reject any activity that interrupted my work. As I met Hunter’s gaze something inside of me seemed to wake up and I found myself nodding.
“Okay.” My voice was gruff.
The surprise on Hunter and Avery’s face was almost comical. Then it slowly sank in that I’d agreed, and Avery jumped up and down and clapped his hands. “Really, Papa? Really? You’ll come too?”
I felt ashamed at the obvious shock on my child’s face that I would bother spending time with him. “Why not?” I gave a tentative smile, feeling a little self-conscious with Tex looking on.
“That’s… that’s great.” Hunter stared at me with an almost puzzled expression.
“I have to eat, right?” I laughed awkwardly.
Hunter glanced at Tex. “You can come too if you’d like, Tex.”
Irritation jolted through me, but I held my tongue. Did he want Tex to come? Was he just being polite?
Tex sighed exaggeratedly, and gave me a pointed look. “Gosh, I would, but Jake wants this tractor fixed by the end of today.”
“Aww, that’s too bad.” Hunter frowned.
I couldn’t tell if Hunter was truly disappointed Tex wasn’t coming. Maybe Tex was crazy and Hunter really was interested in him and not me.
“It’s my own fault. I kept putting it off.” Tex winked at me. “Right, boss?”
“Um…” I wasn’t sure what to say.
“I helped make the sandwiches, Papa.” Avery interrupted, puffing out his chest.
“Oh, well… that’s good. I’m sure they’ll be delicious.”
Hunter shifted the basket to his other hand. “Can you leave for lunch now? Or should we wait for you?”
“Now is fine.” I moved forward and took the basket from him.
He laughed stiffly, but he let me take it. “Oh, thanks.” A hint of confusion shimmered in his eyes.
I turned to Tex. “We’ll be back in a couple of hours.”
“You kids have fun now,” Tex called out with a grin, although he did look a little envious.
I steered the way toward the path that led to the lake, feeling like I’d forgotten how to walk. Avery moved up and skipped beside me, glancing over now and then as if he didn’t quite believe I was accompanying them.
“We’re gonna have so much fun,” he crowed.
“You bet.” I couldn’t help but smile at his enthusiasm.
He went ahead of us, and I slowed down to match my pace with Hunter’s. He kept his gaze straight ahead at first, but then I noticed him glancing over.
“I’m sorry if this is interrupting your work.”
I met his uneasy gaze. “I wouldn’t have agreed to come along if I didn’t want to.”
“Okay.” He grimaced. “I thought maybe we put you on the spot and you didn’t know how to say no.”
“I have no problem saying no.”
He didn’t respond.
I cleared my throat. “I uh… I look forward to spending time with you and Avery.” My voice was stiff and the words didn’t come easily. But at least I’d said them.
“Yeah?” he asked quietly.
I forced a smile. “Definitely.”
His eyes lit with pleasure. “I’m glad.”
I felt ridiculously contented as we walked toward the lake. It felt so right with the warm sun on my back and Hunter by my side. I smiled, watching Avery toss stones toward the
water. There was a tiny nudge of melancholy that Felix had never been able to share these kinds of moments with me and Avery. But at the same time, I knew he would only want Avery to be happy, and judging by the huge smile on his face, Avery was ecstatic.
“I feel like I never really thanked you for painting the rest of the house. Every time I looked at it I’d get irritated because I needed to finish it. One less thing to worry about.”
“My pleasure. I like helping out.” He pushed his hands into his pockets. “I was even thinking, if you don’t mind, I’d like to paint Avery’s room too. Maybe let him pick the color and get him some curtains.”
I glanced over at him. “Does he want that?”
“Yeah. He said he’s always wanted a blue room his whole life.” He grinned. “He’s five. Isn’t that the best?”
I chuckled. “His whole life? Wow, the wait must have been intolerable.”
“I’ll have him help me, just like the outside of the house. He likes helping.”
I winced. “You know my kid better than me.”
“It’s not magic. I spend time with him. That’s all.”
I nodded. “Yeah.”
“And you joined us on our little adventure today.” He smiled. “That’s a start, right?”
I appreciated him trying to make me feel better. “I guess.”
“You’ve got a lot of responsibility, and I understand why you haven’t always put in the time.” He hesitated, as if unsure if he should continue, but then he kept speaking. “But he’s getting old enough now that he notices. Maybe every now and then you can come for a picnic with us. Or maybe read him a bedtime story. It won’t take much, Jake. Just a little time here and there will mean the world to him.”
In the past maybe I’d have bristled at being told I needed to spend more time with Avery. But I knew he was right. If I was honest, it bugged me that he knew my son better than me. “I can do that. I can’t do lunch with you guys every day. But once or twice a week could work.”
“That’s great.” His smile was genuine. “God, he’ll be in heaven.”
“I know I’ve dropped the ball. It was all I could do to keep him fed and clothed. But since you’ve been here… I feel like maybe I should put in a little more effort. Seeing you with him, it’s been enlightening to see how happy he is when he gets attention. I don’t want him to grow up like I did.” I sighed. “I barely remember a kind word from my dad. And I can tell I’m doing the same thing with Avery, and I hate it.”
