by Sedona Venez
“Grace?” I asked.
He nodded. “Ian told Grace about the ledger, and apparently, she figured out the value of the book. She snuck behind his back and went to Bigsby, asking him for money in exchange for giving him back the ledger.”
“That bitch!” I hissed.
“Well, she was the one who put a bull’s-eye on Ian’s back,” Core replied. “Bigsby thought the ledger had burned up in the fire, along with Greer. And when Ian found out what Grace had done, he met with Bigsby and threatened to expose him with the evidence contained in the ledger if he didn’t leave him and his family alone. And you know how well Bigsby took that threat. He decided to put a hit on Ian.”
“But why did Bigsby wait so long after that to come after the ledger?” I asked.
“My best guess is he figured that once he acquired your company and got you wrapped up in his illegal business, you would just turn it over with no questions asked.”
“Oh God.” My tears welled up, more so out of anger than anything else. “For years, I blamed myself for my dad’s death”—tears rolled down my cheeks before I dashed them away—“because the morning of his death, I argued with him and then deliberately disobeyed him by not coming home straight after school. He died because he was out looking for me when that driver slammed into him. But now… Bigsby hired someone to kill him?” I stared at Core, blinking back the tears. “His death wasn’t because of me.”
The memory of that morning and the shouting match I’d had with Dad still made my heart heavy with emotion. Now I couldn’t hold back the tears that fell. I was still racked with so much guilt and self-loathing about that day. Instead of telling him, “I hate you,” I wished all I had said was, “I love you, Dad.”
“Sin? Sin, come on. Please don’t cry.”
He wrapped an arm around me. I struggled, but he pulled me into his broad chest anyway. I nestled there, enjoying his warmth.
“When I arrived home,” I mumbled, “a cop car was pulling away. I raced up the front stairs and slammed into the house to find Grace sitting on the stairs with a drink in her hand, reeking of alcohol.” My mouth felt like sawdust had made a home inside. “She told me that Dad was… dead. That he’d gone out searching for me and a car crashed into his, sending him off the bridge.”
“It wasn’t your fault, Sin. It was Grace who had gotten him killed.”
“I know that now! But why did she let me believe all these years that it was my fault that Dad—Ian—had died?”
It was still so hard for me to believe that he wasn’t my real father. But despite the fact that he wasn’t my biological father, I loved him as such. He had been my lifeline, the man who’d wiped my tears and loved me so much.
“She doesn’t hate you, Sin. She hates herself.”
“No. I’m pretty sure Grace hates me. I’m not her child. I’m just some other woman’s baby that she has been forced to parent. It is a recipe for disaster because Grace doesn’t have a nurturing bone in her body. She is a selfish, hateful bitch who has never loved me, but how could she betray her own husband?” That I couldn’t understand.
I’d always suspected by her actions and words toward Dad that she didn’t love him, but if she’d resented him so much, why hadn’t she divorced him? I shook my head. There was no way to figure out why people did the crazy things they did, but as far as Grace was concerned, her ass could rot in hell.
“And all those lives destroyed because of one man… Bigsby.”
I hated Bigsby for taking so much away from me. Maybe if my real parents were alive, I wouldn’t have had such a fucked-up life, being at the mercy of Grace’s emotional abuse. Dad had done his best to shield me from her, but frankly, he hadn’t done enough.
“Your mother,” I started, “my dad, my biological parents are all gone because that fucker Bigsby thinks people are disposable, like razors.” I pushed away from Core, staring at him with narrowed eyes. “Their lives were nothing but damn footnotes. He has to pay the price for taking away their lives.”
I was teeming with a level of rage that was new for me, and I didn’t know how to subdue it. Vengeance rode me hard.
“I agree. He has to be stopped before he tries to hurt you.” His tone was hard and sharp. His lips twisted into a snarl.
“Hurt? What the hell are you talking about now?”
“Bigsby gave me an ultimatum. If I don’t give him back the ledger and any copies I’ve made, plus the recording that Jeff made, within seventy-two hours, he’s threatened to kill you.”
“Great!” I threw my hands up in the air. “This shit just keeps getting better and better. He’s going to kill me.” Bile crept up, and I pushed it down.
With a dismissive wave of his hand, he intoned, “That shit will never happen. I’m going to end him before he can even try to kill you or me.”
I sighed heavily. “And the ledger and recordings are the only leverage you have to bring him down?”
“No.” He scowled. “There’s a gun stowed away in Bigsby’s safe. Kevin’s working on finding out how we can get that, too.”
“What’s with the gun?” I asked.
“It’s the gun he used to kill my mother,” he stated in a low, ominous voice.
I narrowed my eyes. “He kept it?”
Core just nodded.
“Damn. Bigsby is a real piece of shit.”
There was a special place in hell for a man like Bigsby, who had taken at least three lives without any remorse and then kept a trophy from his kill. Anger rolled over my skin, raising the hair on my arms.
“We can’t let him go unchecked,” I breathed out. “You’ve got more than enough evidence to bring him down, Core. So what’s the fucking problem?”
Silence stretched for long moments. Core’s eyes shone with a clear understanding. Behind them, I saw the same ire and exasperation I had felt.
“Bigsby disappeared,” he snapped. “But my intel says he hasn’t left New York City… yet.”
More silence. The muscles in Core’s forearms bulged from clenching his hands into fists.
“Oh shit! Bigsby went underground? That’s not good.”
Now Bigsby was lurking in the shadows, just waiting to kill me if he didn’t get the ledger.
“No. The situation is not good.”
I sucked in a sharp breath as the fury sparked inside me. I was not going to let Bigsby get away with taking and destroying so many lives. My dad’s life had stood for something. Core’s mother’s life wasn’t just some afterthought, never to be revisited. And rage burned deep inside me that Bigsby had taken away the life I could have had with my biological parents. I’d be damned if I was going to cower in some corner, waiting for Bigsby to come after me, too. I would fight for my life tooth and nail. And if I lost the battle against Bigsby—which I damn well hoped I didn’t—I was going to make sure he paid the price for his misdeeds one way or another.
“Well, you’re not giving him that fucking ledger or recording back,” I snapped. “I don’t give a shit what happens to me. Bigsby took my family away from me. He has to pay. How do we make that happen?”
“We’re meeting him in seventy-two hours. That’s Thursday. He’s expecting me to hand over the ledger and recording then. We’ll use that meeting to kill him.”
Bigsby has to be dealt with strategically and with brute force. And if that means his death… so be it. No one will mourn a world with one less psychopath in it.
“So we just sit around waiting for seventy-two hours?” I ranted. “Are you out of your mind?” I shouted. “He could be plotting anything by now.”
Fear and apprehension coursed through my veins. Fear was something I hated to experience because it made me impulsive, which was the worst way to handle things and people like Bigsby.
“We’re trying to track his money because he’s going to need cash to leave the country. The minute we have some good intel, we’ll try to take him down before the meeting. But you won’t be safe, Sin, until we get him.”
Core is right. I’m not safe. Shit. This situation has turned into the clusterfuck of all damn clusterfucks.
Bigsby was a psychopath, willing and capable of taking a life—mine. Fear shook me to the bone. But when the image of my dad’s face flashed through my head, resolve steeled my nerves. There were only two ways to handle Bigsby—flight or fight. I decided to take the latter route. I couldn’t control Bigsby’s actions, but I could control how I felt about them, and I wasn’t going to go down without a fight.
“Safe? Honestly, Core, I don’t give a damn.”
But that was the furthest thing from the truth. I gave a lot of damns. Because at the end of the day, there could only be two outcomes from our battle against Bigsby—me ending up dead or remaining alive—and I had too much shit to live for, so I chose to duke this shit out gladiator-style until the bitter end.
Core grabbed my face between his hands. “I care for you, Sin… and you’re mine,” he proclaimed while one hand slid down. His thumb stroked my lips.
I barely held back the urge to run my tongue over the callused pad of his finger. “I’m not your property, McKay.”
“You can deny it.” He traced along my cheek, down my jaw, across the curve of my neck, and over my collarbone. Gentle, languid movements. “Argue about it. Try to run away from it. But you’re still mine. I will not hurt you, and I will always protect you. And when you realize that you and I are forever… you’ll begin to trust me.” He paused. “I’m a patient man, Sin.”
My heart thundered. I liked that he wanted to fight for me… for us.
Is it too late to salvage our relationship?
“You’re insane, McKay. You manipulated me for your own ends. I can’t trust you anymore.”
And while knowing I had to trust Core in order to survive a Bigsby attack, actually doing it was a completely different thing.
“Sin”—his voice was still low, a sultry, deep rumble—“in the beginning, it was business, but that changed for me a long time ago. You mean so much more to me now. Just give me time to prove it to you.”
“Crazy—that’s what you are,” I whispered.
“That makes two of us.” He curled his mouth into a smile. He slowly lowered his head, watching me. When I tensed, he whispered, “I haven’t tasted you in hours. One kiss, and then you can go back to being mad at me.” His hands pressed into my lower back as he pulled me closer.
He waited inches above my lips for consent.
Shit. This is wrong on so many levels.
He’d manipulated me into his business spiderweb, claiming ninety-seven percent of my business, all while using me as a pawn to get revenge on the most repulsive man I knew—Bigsby.
Frankly, everything Core had done earned him a top spot on my shit list because he could have come clean with me a lot sooner.
I sighed heavily, pushing aside the dark, ugly thoughts, and considered the positive things that came out of having a mutual enemy—Bigsby. Everything Core had done was in my best interest, too, since we were tied together because of Bigsby’s nasty deeds.
If Core hadn’t come into my life right when he did, my life would have turned out a lot differently. If Bigsby had gotten what he wanted from me—to become a major stakeholder in my business—I would have been unwittingly shoved knee deep into his sex trafficking business. And given how devious Bigsby was, he would have figured out how to easily get the ledger from me. And when Bigsby was done getting everything he wanted from me—business and ledger—he probably would have killed me because I knew too much.
I took a deep breath. For better or for worse, Core’s and my destiny, future, and very life were tied together. For how long… I didn’t know. But there was no doubt in my mind that Core and I would be stronger working together than apart.
I glanced from Core’s smoldering eyes to his ridiculously sexy mouth. The tension melted from my traitorous body.
He felt my resistance disappear. His mouth covered mine.
My eyes fluttered closed. His lips, warm and firm, moved with a featherlight touch against mine, as if he were discovering their shape and texture all over again.
His kiss was slow, confident, unhurried, and sensuous. I tried to hold on to the anger, distrust, and hurt from everything he’d done to me when pleasure zinged through my body and grew liquid. Lost in the sensation, I touched his jaw. He licked and nibbled at my lips, his breathing deepening.
My fingers traveled up from his jaw and threaded through his hair. He opened his mouth and drove into me with his tongue. The pleasure spiked higher, sharper. He growled deep in his throat before reaching down to hike up my dress and pick me up. My legs wrapped around his waist as he carried me over to the corner of the rooftop where there was a long bar, and he plopped me on top.
He angled my head, so he had better access and could plunge deeper into my mouth, his body hardening. He drove his thigh between my legs, pushing up against the area that had grown wet in response to him.
I made another muffled noise as I kissed him back with escalating excitement. He growled and pushed harder with his thigh, deeper with his tongue. He hit just the right spot.
I gasped and arched my pelvis. Both of my arms were now wrapped around his neck. He cupped my ass and pulled me up more tightly against him. He wound his other arm behind my neck, holding me pressed along the length of his body.
He found a wicked rhythm with mouth and thigh that stole all thoughts from me until I was so torched that I was wantonly eating at him.
He devoured me with starved greed. My hands ran over his muscular shoulders while his thick, hard erection pressed against me.
If we were undressed, Core would have slid inside me.
The feel of his cock burning against me made me wiggle closer, trying to settle my throbbing heat against him to get that fraction of an inch closer. I felt his breathing slow.
I want his clothes off.
I want him inside me… holding me down as he pounds into me hard and fast, making me temporarily forget the ugliness of the Bigsby mess and Core’s violation of my trust.
But there was still so much residual stuff between us due to all the manipulative crap he’d done.
There was a part of me that was furious with Core. I wanted to shout at him, tell him how much he’d hurt me by not telling me the truth about Bigsby sooner, that I didn’t know if I could ever trust him again, that he was the first man in a while I’d let get so close to me emotionally, but that he’d gone and fucked up everything.
And without trust, aren’t we building a relationship on a foundation of sand?
The fact that he hadn’t been forthcoming with the truth about Bigsby from the get-go contaminated every area of our relationship.
How can I believe anything he says anymore without the urge for me to play detective to confirm it’s true?
Trust was a pretty big fucking deal in any relationship, and I wasn’t sure if I could wholeheartedly trust him again.
I had to pull way the hell back now.
I yanked my mouth away. “Stop,” I pleaded. “It’s too much.”
He reared back his head and hissed. He crushed me to him and didn’t move, his body strung tight.
I turned and buried my face against his hard, bunched biceps. I whispered, “I’m going home. I need some space to think… alone.” I looked up at him, determined to make it clear that he wasn’t forgiven for his transgressions.
And even though I was terrified of the possibility of Bigsby attacking me, I needed breathing room from Core. As soon as I got inside my home, I planned on having my cell in hand at all times with 9-1-1 on speed dial and ready to call at the slightest sound of trouble.
He was looking down at me, the planes and angles of his dark face cut sharp. “It’s dangerous with Bigsby underground and plotting against you and me. It’s better if you stay with me until we catch him.”
“What didn’t you understand? I can’t be around you right now.” I became decidedly defiant, a scowl pulling my face tigh
t.
With a piercing gaze, he studied me for a long time. “You’ll stay at my penthouse, and that shit is not negotiable.” He snarled.
I glared at him even though, internally, I conceded to the fact that I was acting on emotions and he was the voice of reason. I knew Bigsby wanted to kill me. I wasn’t an idiot, and I damn sure didn’t have a death wish. “Separate rooms.”
“If that’s what you want.” The tension in his body eased.
“Yes, that’s what I fucking want,” I replied. “But I need to go to my place to pick up some essentials for a longer stay at your house.”
He lifted me off the bar, giving me a long, lingering once-over, his eyes roving over me inch by inch as I fixed my dress, smoothing it into place.
His eyes blazed with raw sensuality as they raked over me. “Let’s go. I’ll drive you home.” He placed a hand on the small of my back, escorting me off the rooftop.
The deeper I went into Core’s world, the more I understood him.
Core was dangerous, deadly, and focused—all traits that, instead of repelling me from him, drew me closer like a magnet.
ONCE WE WERE IN THE car after leaving Redemption, we had a brief conversation about Jaxon, and then time ticked by as we drove in silence. The hush made the rest of the drive to my townhouse seem longer. Much longer.
Moments stretched, and Core spent more time glancing at me than looking at the road.
I felt as though I’d been through a tornado. Resting my head against the soft leather headrest with my eyes closed, now that my brain had started working again, I grappled with the fact that my entire view of the world had been proven false.
Ian is not my dad. He’s my uncle.
Grace is not my mother… which, frankly, is a blessing in damn disguise.
Greer and Aubrey—Jemma—are my real parents but are both dead.
I frowned. Scratch that. Greer was conclusively dead, but Jemma… that was still an open question. But she had to be dead. If she were alive, wouldn’t she have contacted me? My stomach hardened. Not if I was some sort of pregnancy mistake and she didn’t want anything to do with me. Given my lifelong experience with a non-maternal woman—Grace—that was likely the situation.
