Nicole was stunned. She had not expected this news, certainly not at this time. She had told everyone that she thought they would be allowed-
“So Max is right,” she said, fighting the tears that were threatening to flow. “We are your prisoners.”
“You must interpret the decision for yourself,” Archie said. “But I will tell you that insofar as I understand your language, I think the term ‘prisoner,’ which Max has often used lately, is not correct.”
“Then give me a better word, and some more explanation,” Nicole said angrily, rising from her chair. “You know what the others will say.”
“I cannot,” Archie replied. “I have transmitted our entire message.”
Nicole paced around the room, her emotions swinging wildly from rage to depression. She knew how Max would react. Everyone would be angry. Even Richard and Patrick would remind her that she had been wrong. But why won’t they explain? she thought. It’s not like them. Nicole felt a slight pain in her heart and slumped into her chair.
“And what’s the second thing you want to tell me?” Nicole said at length.
“I have personally worked with the data engineers,” Archie said, “to prepare the video files you are about to access. From what I know about human beings, and you specifically, I think that if you see this material, it will cause you extreme distress. I would like to ask you to consider not looking at the files at all.”
Archie had chosen carefully what he had said, doubtless because he understood how important the videos were to Nicole. His message was clear. What I am about to see will cause me grief, she thought. But what choice do I have? “Between nothing and grief,” she remembered, “I will choose grief.”
After Nicole thanked Archie for his concern and informed the octospider that she wanted to see the videos anyway, Archie pushed the chair in which she was sitting over in front of the desk and showed her how to control the data access. The time code had been translated by the
octospiders into human numbers, in terms of days before the present, and there were four speeds at which the images could be shown, covering four octal orders of magnitude, from one-eighth real time to sixty-four times normal speed.
“The data on Katie are nearly complete,” Archie said, “for about the last six months of your time. It is our normal data management process to filter and compress older data, based on its importance. The extended files on Katie show most of the key events for the past two years, but are fairly scarce before that.”
Nicole reached out for the controls. As she dialed up the most recent data entry and saw Katie’s face appear on the screen, she felt Archie tapping on her shoulder. “You may use this facility the rest of today,” the octospider said to her when she turned around, “but that is all. Since the amount of data available is enormous, I suggest you use the high speeds to locate events of interest.”
Nicole took a deep breath and turned back around to the screen.
She felt as if she could not cry anymore. Her eyes were nearly swollen shut from the constant stream of tears. Nicole had watched Katie inject herself with the drug kokomo at least half a dozen times already, but as she saw her daughter tie the rubber cord around her upper arm and plunge the needle into a bulging vein again, a new set of burning tears found their way into Nicole’s eyes.
What she had seen in almost ten hours was so much worse than her most horrible imaginings that Nicole was utterly destroyed. Despite the fact that there was no sound with any of the pictures, it had been easy for Nicole to understand what Katie’s life was all about. First, her daughter was a hopeless drug addict. At least four times a day-more if life was not going well for her-Katie retreated to her fancy apartment, either by herself or with friends, and used the elegant drug paraphernalia that she kept in a large locked box in her dressing room.
Katie was charming immediately after the drug rush. She was friendly, funny, and full of both energy and apparent self-confidence. But if the drugs wore off while she was still partying, Katie was quickly transformed into a screaming, hostile bitch who ended many evenings alone with her needle in her apartment.
Katie’s official job was the management of the Vegas prostitutes. In that position Katie was also responsible for recruiting new talent. At first Nicole’s broken heart was unwilling to acknowledge what her eyes were telling her. But one long, sordid sequence, which began with Katie befriending a lovely but poor teenage Hispanic in San Miguel and ended with the girl, now magnificently dressed and bejeweled, becoming a temporary concubine for one of Nakamura’s zaibatsu chiefs a few days later, forced Nicole to admit to herself that her daughter had absolutely no morals or scruples.
After Nicole had been watching the videos for many hours, Archie entered the room and offered her something to eat. Nicole declined. She knew that in her agitated state there was no way she could have retained any food in her stomach.
Why did Nicole keep watching for so long? Why didn’t she just switch off the controls and leave the room? Later she would ask herself the same questions. Nicole concluded, when she thought about it later, that after the first few hours of watching she began, at least subconsciously, to search for the existence of some signs of hope in Katie’s life. It was not in her nature to accept without argument that her daughter was fundamentally corrupt. Nicole longed desperately to see something in the videos that would suggest to her that Katie’s future might be different.
Nicole eventually found two elements in Katie’s unhappy life that Nicole somehow convinced herself were signs that her daughter might someday break out of her self-destructive pattern. During Katie’s terrible bouts of depression, which occurred most often when her supply of drugs was low, Katie would often fly into a frenzy, smashing everything she could find in her apartment. Except for her framed photographs of Richard and Patrick. Toward the end of these frenetic tantrums, when her energy was exhausted, Katie would always take those two pictures off her dresser and lay them gently on her bed. She would then lie beside the photographs and sob for twenty to thirty minutes. To Nicole, this recurrent behavior indicated that Katie still retained some love for her family.
The other hopeful element, in Nicole’s mind, was Franz Bauer, the police captain who was Katie’s regular consort. Nicole did not pretend to understand their bizarre relationship-one night the pair would have a terrible, obscene fight, and the next Franz would read Katie the poems of Rainer Maria Rilke as a prelude to several hours of endless, energetic sex-but she thought she could tell from the videos both that Franz loved Katie in his own strange way and that he did not approve of her drug addiction. During one of their fights, in fact, Franz picked up Katie’s drug supply and threatened to flush it down the toilet. Katie went completely berserk and attacked Franz wildly with a hairbrush.
Hour after hour, Nicole continued to watch in an attempt to comprehend her daughter’s tragic life. As the long day progressed and Nicole scanned through the earlier videos, some as early as the first days of Katie’s drug addiction, Nicole discovered that Katie had even had a sordid affair with Nakamura himself and that the New Eden tyrant had regularly provided Katie with drugs during the time they were sexual partners.
By this time Nicole was numb. She was also so emotionally drained that she did not have the strength to move. When Nicole finally switched off the controls, she put her head down on the desk, cried for a few more minutes, and then fell asleep. Archie woke her four hours later and told her it was time to return home.
It was dark. The transport had been parked at the plaza for ten minutes, but Nicole had still not disembarked. Archie was standing beside her.
“There is no way that I can tell Richard about what I have seen today,” she said, glancing up at the octospider. “He will be absolutely destroyed.”
“I understand,” Archie said sympathetically. “Now you see why I suggested that you not watch the videos.”
“You were right,” Nicole said, slowly releasing her grasp on the vertical bar and resignedly extending
one leg out of the car, “but it’s too late now. I can’t erase the horrible pictures that are in my mind.”
“You told me earlier,” Archie said as soon as they were outside the transport, “that it was obvious from me videos that Patrick had known something about the life Katie was leading before his escape. He elected not to tell you and Richard the worst details. Is it a violation of your personal principles to do something similar?”
“Thanks, Archie,” Nicole said, patting the octospider on the shoulder and almost smiling, “for reading my mind. You’re beginning to know us too well.”
“We have a difficult time with truth in our society also,” Archie commented. “One of our fundamental guidelines for new optimizers is to tell the truth at all times. It is acceptable to withhold information, the policy says, but not to pass falsehoods. The youngest optimizers are very zealous about telling the truth, without regard for the consequences. Sometimes truth and compassion are not compatible.”
“I agree with you, my wise alien friend,” Nicole said with a heavy sigh. “And now, after what I can definitely say was one of the worst days of my life, I face not one, but two very difficult tasks. I must tell Max that he will not be able to leave the Emerald City, and I must inform my husband, Richard, that his favorite daughter is a dope addict and a manager of whores. I hope that somewhere in this old and exhausted human is the strength necessary to handle those two duties properly.”
10
Richard was asleep when b, Nicole arrived at home. She was thankful that she did not need to explain anything right away. Nicole slipped into her nightgown and climbed gently into bed. But she could not fall asleep. Her mind kept jumping back and forth between the horrible images she had seen during the day and thoughts about what she was going to tell Richard and the others.
In her twilight state Nicole suddenly saw herself sitting in the bleachers in Rouen beside her father, in the square where Joan of Arc had been burned to death eight hundred years earlier. Nicole was a teenager again, as she had been when her father had actually taken her to Rouen to see the conclusion of the Joan of Arc pageant. The oxcart carrying Joan was coming into the square and the people were shouting.
“Daddy,” the teenage Nicole said, yelling to be heard above the din, “what can I do to help Katie?”
Her father had not heard the question. His attention was completely focused on the Maid of Orleans, or rather the French girl who was playing Joan. Nicole watched as the girt, who had the same clear and piercing eyes attributed to Joan, was tied to the stake. The girl began to pray softly as one of the bishops read her death sentence.
“What about Katie?” Nicole said again. There was no response. The audience around her in the bleachers gasped as the piles of wood surrounding Joan were set on fire. Nicole stood up with the crowd as the flames spread quickly around the base of the huge wooden stake. She could clearly hear the prayers of St. Joan, invoking the blessing of Jesus.
The flames moved closer to the girl. Nicole looked at the face of the teenager who had changed history and a cold shudder ran down her back. “Katie,” she screamed. “No! No!”
Nicole tried desperately to find some way out of the bleachers, but she was blocked on all sides. There was no way she could save her burning daughter. “Katie! Katie!” Nicole screamed again, flailing wildly at the people around her.
She felt arms around her chest. It took a few seconds for Nicole to realize that she had been dreaming. Richard was staring at her with alarm. Before Nicole could speak, Ellie walked into the bedroom in her robe.
“Are you all right. Mother?” she asked. “I was up checking on Nikki and I heard you scream Katie’s name.”
Nicole glanced first at Robert, then at Ellie. She closed her eyes. She could still see Katie’s anguished face, contorted in pain, just above the flames. Nicole opened her eyes again and looked at her husband and daughter. “Katie is very unhappy,” she said, and then she burst into tears.
Nicole could not be consoled. Each time she would start to tell Richard and Ellie the details about what she had seen, she would start crying again. “I feel so frustrated, so helpless,” Nicole said when she could finally control herself. “Katie is in dire straits and there is absolutely nothing any of us can do to help her.”
Summarizing Katie’s life without omitting anything except some of the more kinky sexual escapades, Nicole abandoned her tentative plan to soften her report. Both Richard and Ellie were stunned and saddened by the news.
“I don’t know how you managed to sit there and watch for all those hours,” Richard said at one point. “I would have been out of there in a few minutes.”
“Katie’s so lost, so utterly lost,” said Ellie, shaking her head. A few minutes later little Nikki wandered into the bedroom looking for her mother. Ellie embraced Nicole and took Nikki back to their room.
“I’m sorry I was so distraught, Richard,” Nicole said a few minutes later, just before they went back to sleep.
“It’s understandable,” Richard said. “The day must have been absolutely horrible.”
Nicole wiped her eyes for the umpteenth time. “I can only remember one other time in my life when I cried like this,” she said, managing a tiny smile. “Back when I was fifteen. My father told me one day that he was thinking about proposing to this Englishwoman he was dating. I didn’t like her-she was a cold and distant woman-but I didn’t think it was proper for me to say anything negative to my father. Anyway, I was devastated. I picked up my pet mallard Dunois and raced down to our pond at Beauvois. I rowed out into the middle of the pond, brought the oars into the boat, and cried for several hours.”
They lay in silence for a few minutes. “Oh, Jesus,” Nicole suddenly said, “I almost forgot. Archie also told me today that none of us would be permitted to return to New Eden. He said it was a security issue. Max will be furious.”
“Don’t worry about it now,” Richard said softly. ‘Try to get some sleep. We’ll talk about it in the morning.”
Nicole snuggled into Richard’s arms and fell asleep.
“For see-cur-i-tee reasons?” Max yelled. “Now, just what the fuck does that mean?”
Patrick and Nai both rose from the breakfast table. “Just leave your food,” Nai said, motioning for the children to follow her. “We can have some fruit and cereal in the schoolroom.”
Both Kepler and Galileo were reluctant to leave. They sensed that something important was going to be discussed. Only when Patrick came around the table toward them did they push back their chairs and rise.
Benjy was allowed to remain after he promised Nicole he would not repeat any of the conversation to the children. Eponine left the table to nurse the waking Marius in one of the comers of the room.
“I don’t know what it means,” Nicole said to Max after the children had departed. “Archie would not elaborate.”
“Well, this is just god-damn wonderful,” Max said. “We can’t leave, but those slimy friends of yours won’t even tell us why. Why didn’t you demand to see the Chief Optimizer right there on the spot? Don’t you think they owe us some kind of explanation?”
“Yes, I do,” Nicole replied. “And perhaps we should all ask for another audience with the Chief Optimizer. I’m sorry, Max, but I didn’t handle the situation very well. I was prepared to watch the videos of Katie and, quite frankly, Archie’s pronouncement caught me off guard.”
“Shit, Nicole,” Max said, “I don’t blame you personally. Anyway, since Ep, Marius, and I are the only ones who still want to return to New Eden, it’s our job to appeal this decision. I doubt if the Chief Optimizer has ever seen a two-month-old baby human in the flesh.”
The rest of the breakfast conversation was mostly about Katie and what Nicole had seen the day before in the videos. The family explained the gist of Katie’s unhappy life without too many specifics.
When Patrick returned, he reported that the children were already busy with their lessons. “Nai and I have been talking about a lot of
things,” he said, addressing everyone at the table. “First, Max, we would like to ask you to be a little more careful in front of the children with your negative comments about the octospiders. They are now quite fearful when Archie or Dr. Blue are around, and their reactions must be based on what they have overheard in our conversations.”
Max bridled and started to reply. “Please, Max,” Patrick added quickly, “you know that I’m your friend. Let’s not
argue about it. Just think about what I’ve said and remember that we may all be staying here with the octospiders for a long time.
“Second,” he continued, “Nai and I both feel, especially in view of what we learned this morning, that the children should be learning the octospider language. We want them to start as soon as possible. We think we need Ellie or Mother, plus an octospider or two… not just to teach, but also to familiarize the children again with their alien hosts. Hercules has been gone for a couple of months now. Mother, will you talk to Archie about this, please?”
Nicole nodded and Patrick excused himself, saying that he needed to return to the classroom. “Patrick has become a good teacher,” Benjy volunteered. “He is very patient with me and the children.”
Nicole smiled to herself and looked across the breakfast table at her daughter. Considering everything, she thought, our children have turned out fine. I should be thankful for Patrick, Ellie, and Benjy. And not worry myself sick about Katie.
In one of the corners of her bedroom, Nai Watanabe finished her meditation and said the Buddhist morning prayers that had been part of her daily routine since she was a small child in Thailand. She crossed into the living room, heading for the other bedroom to wake the twins, and found, much to her surprise, that Patrick was asleep on the couch. He was still dressed and her electronic reader was lying on his stomach.
She shook him gently. “Wake up, Patrick,” she said. “It’s morning… You’ve slept the whole night here.”
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