“Thanks, Grandmother. I’d like to check it out for you.”
“Another thing, dear.”
“Yes?”
“Before your grandfather died, he set aside a few things he wanted you to have. Not really much, but maybe we can go through them sometime before you go back to San Francisco.”
“I’d like that, Grandmother.” Meg beamed. To think that Grandpa had actually thought of her before his death. It was a great comfort to know that. She leaned over and kissed Grandmother’s cheek, something she’d never done before. She wondered if Grandmother would mind, but the old woman just smiled and closed her eyes.
“I’ll be back tomorrow then, Grandmother.”
“That’ll be fine.”
NINE
Meg told Erin all about her confrontation with Cousin Abner as she peeled potatoes for dinner. “I cannot believe that man is actually related to us! He reminds me of a character in an old hillbilly movie; you know, the kind of guy who would meet you on his front porch with a loaded shotgun and spit a stream of tobacco on your shoe.”
“I know what you mean, Meg. He’s made it so uncomfortable that we hardly ever go out to see Grandmother anymore. We used to invite her over here, but then she became bedridden. I feel guilty for not going over more often, but the girls are terrified of Abner, and he’s always popping in over there. I think it’s like that for everyone. It’s really sad. But all this time, Grandmother has never stood up to him once. She just lets him rule Briar Hedge as if he’s lord of the manor. As if she’s already dead and buried.”
“But why?”
“Well, I think it has to do with his father.”
“Really? How’s that?”
“I don’t know.” Erin tore lettuce for a salad as she spoke. “But for some reason, I think Grandmother is carrying around a load of guilt about Bennie. Or maybe it’s just displaced loyalty. I’ve never been able to get to the bottom of it, but I know one thing: Bennie was no saint.”
“How do you know?”
“Sunny told me a little bit about it once after she’d had a couple of drinks. She said that it hadn’t been easy having Bennie as an older brother. It was almost as if being Bennie Lancaster’s little sister carried some sort of awful shame with it. I felt kind of sorry for her.”
“But what does that mean? How could Bennie make it hard for Sunny? Wasn’t he about ten years older than her? Do you suppose he abused her or something?”
“No, I don’t think so—not physically, anyway. Maybe verbally, though. It sounded like he was a real bully. That’s probably why Abner is like that; it’s some genetic thing.” Erin sliced a tomato into wedges and tossed them onto the growing salad. “Apparently Bennie had a bad reputation that made it difficult for Sunny when she was a teenager. She didn’t really go into much detail. She actually seemed a little uncomfortable talking about it. There are a few secrets in this family, Meg. It would sure be nice to get to the bottom of some of them before Grandmother is gone. There’s no telling if we’ll get much information from Sunny.”
“Speaking of Sunny, I had quite an interesting lunch with her.” Meg told Erin about the fiasco at the Beach House.
Erin laughed. “Oh, that’s nothing. I could tell you a hundred stories that are that bad and worse.” She paused. “Although, I have noticed lately that Sunny seems to be trying harder.”
“Hmm. Now that you mention it, I was surprised that she didn’t have anything to drink.”
Erin turned down the burner under the bubbling pot of potatoes, then looked at Meg seriously. “All I can say is that our mother is a difficult person. There’s a whole lot under the surface that we may or may not ever get to know. Whenever I pray for her, I get convicted just to love her.”
“So, do you?”
“I wish I could say yes. I do try, but sometimes it’s difficult. In fact, lately I’ve been asking God to love her through me. That seems to work better. Maybe now that you’re here it’ll get easier.”
“I don’t see how.”
“Well, Sunny always seemed to relate to you better than to me.”
“You’ve got to be kidding. I would have said just the opposite. I always felt like you two were always in sync and I was the odd one out.”
Erin laughed. “That just goes to show you how tuned in we both were!”
The door to the garage suddenly opened. “Hi, ladies,” called Tom. Behind him trooped in the three girls, dripping wet.
“Leave your muddy things in the laundry room,” Erin told her daughters. “How was soccer practice, coach?”
“Wet and cold,” said Tom as he pecked Erin on the cheek. Jennifer and Hannah streaked by in their stocking feet, arguing about who got the first shower.
“I think Ashley better not come with me next time,” said Tom. “There’s really not much for her to do, and I think she got pretty bored, not to mention cold.”
“And soaked,” said Erin, patting Ashley’s wet curls. “Ash, you better go get those wet clothes off. And you can take a bath in Mommy’s big tub, okay? That’ll warm you right up. Can you help her, Tom?”
Ashley nodded and slowly plodded up the stairs, Tom following. On the third step, he swooped her up and carried her the rest of the way.
“That must be nice.” Meg sighed.
“What’s that?” Erin asked absently as she mixed salad dressing.
“Having a daddy like that. Do you ever wonder what it would have been like, Erin?”
Erin nodded slowly. “Yeah, I think about how lucky these girls are. Well, not lucky. More like blessed.”
“Why weren’t we blessed like that, Erin?”
“I don’t know, Meg. But I think that God must keep a special watch over children without fathers.”
“I hope so. I could sure use some watching out for.”
Erin wrapped a comforting arm around her sister’s shoulders. “And sometimes God uses people to watch out for the fatherless.”
Erin was just setting the roast on the table when Tom and the girls came down. It was a pleasant dinner, with the older girls talking about soccer practice and the team they would play against on Saturday. Only Ashley remained quiet, her cheeks flushed.
“You look pretty worn out, Ashley,” said Meg.
The little girl nodded slightly.
“Maybe you should go to bed early tonight, honey,” Erin suggested.
“Can Aunt Meggie tuck me in?” asked Ashley.
“I’d love to,” said Meg. Erin smiled, and Meg took Ashley by the hand and led her upstairs. Ashley’s feet moved slowly, as if mounting each step were like climbing a mountain. Finally, they reached Ashley’s room, and Meg tucked the little girl into her bed with the doll named Molly by her side.
“Would you like me to read a story or anything?” asked Meg.
“You can pray,” said Ashley in a tired voice.
Pray? Meg used to pray back when she was a kid. But she hadn’t prayed much in the last twenty years.
“Okay,” she finally said in an uncertain voice. Ashley closed her eyes as if to signal she was ready for Meg to begin.
“Dear God,” stated Meg. “Thank you for this good day. Thank you for letting me come to stay with Erin and her family. And thank you for letting me get to know my sweet little niece Ashley. Now, please give Ashley good dreams.” Meg couldn’t think of anything else to say. She peeked one eye open, and to her surprise, Ashley appeared to have already fallen asleep.
“Amen,” whispered Meg as she brushed a stray curl from Ashley’s forehead. Ashley’s head felt warm, and her cheeks looked overly pink. Could she have a fever? But Meg had never been a mother; what did she know about these things? She clicked off the light and left the room.
“Thanks so much, Meg,” said Erin when Meg came downstairs. “Do you want some tea or decaf coffee? Tom made a fire, and Jennifer has KP tonight. Let’s go put our feet up and relax.”
As they settled into the cozy living room, Meg had to fend off another unwanted wave of jealousy.
Erin’s life was so perfect. It just didn’t seem fair. And yet, at the same time, Meg was very happy for her sister.
“I saw your pottery at Sunny’s gallery. They look nice, Erin. Do you sell many there?”
“Not enough to quit my day job.” Erin laughed. “It’s mostly to make Sunny happy.”
“Does Sunny paint anymore?”
“Not that I know of. It’s too bad. She used to be pretty good. But she’s such a tough art critic that it must be hard for her to allow her own work out in public. It’s a shame; she used to enjoy painting.”
“Where did she meet Sigfried? And what exactly is their relationship? He seems very protective of her.”
“I’m never really sure. I used to think Siggie was pretty weird, but he’s really a nice guy once you get to know him. He always speaks his mind, and if he doesn’t like you, he’ll be sure to let you know. But you’re right; he is very protective of Sunny. He moved down here from Eugene the same time she did, about five years ago. He has his own apartment down by the waterfront. At first, I thought they’d live together, but it never happened. They do spend a lot of time together, though, outside of work.”
“He looks quite a bit younger than Sunny, not that it’s a big deal.” Meg suddenly remembered that Jerred was almost ten years her junior.
“Sunny has never let age differences bother her.” Erin chuckled. “Remember when she was going out with that college kid who was just a few years older than me?”
“Oh, yeah. Wasn’t his name Ted, or Ed, or something like that?”
“Ned!” exclaimed Erin.
“That’s right. Ned the nerd! Remember, we used to tease him about his pocket protectors and polyester pants. Boy, he sure didn’t dress like that for long. He became a hippie right before our eyes.”
“Do you ever wonder what his parents thought?” said Erin. “They send nerdy Ned off to college, and he comes back in tie-dyed T-shirts and love beads!”
“And with a girlfriend almost old enough to be his mother.”
“Sad,” said Erin.
“Very sad. It could almost make you never want to become a mother.” Meg slowly shook her head.
Erin looked at Meg curiously. “Do you ever think about it?”
“What, you mean having kids? Don’t you think I should get married first? Or did you forget the speech that you and Tom gave me just last night?” Meg grinned.
“Don’t be smart. I’m serious—do you ever think about being a mom? Do you have any desire to have children? I mean, I hear about career women who have no intention of having children—ever.”
“I thought about having kids when Jerred and I were engaged. It seemed like the natural thing to do then. But I’m not getting any younger. Sometimes I think about having kids at my age, and it’s downright scary.”
Erin smiled. “Oh, women are having babies clear into their forties these days. Don’t worry. If God wants you to have kids, he’ll work out all the details.”
“Including the husband? Or did you think it might be immaculate conception?”
Erin rolled her eyes. “Very funny. But just for the record, I think you would make a great mom.”
“And what do you base that wild assumption on?”
“I’ve seen you with Ashley. You have a way about you that children like. And I know Ashley likes you. She doesn’t even let her sisters or the baby-sitter tuck her in at night. It’s either Tom or me. You may have made Ashley-history tonight.”
Meg smiled. “That’s nice. I really like Ashley. If I ever do have children, I hope I have one just like her.”
“Be careful what you wish for. Ashley can be a little devil when she wants to. She has quite the stubborn streak. In fact, she reminds me of another little girl I used to know.”
“Well, good for her! A woman needs a bit of stubbornness in her.” Meg leaned back and yawned. “Speaking of Ashley, she felt a little warm when I tucked her in. Do you think she could be coming down with anything?”
“Probably just all the excitement of the birthday party, and then getting wet at soccer practice—”
“Mommy,” Hannah called from the den. “I need help with my math homework.”
“I think I’ll turn in early tonight,” said Meg. “I picked up a new book that I can’t wait to read.”
“Sounds like a plan. Good night, Meg.”
Meg slipped up to her room, grateful for a bit of solitude. As much as she liked Erin’s family, she didn’t know how long she would be comfortable here. There was definitely a lot more noise than she was used to. Meg had always had a low tolerance for noise. Maybe Erin was wrong about her. Maybe Meg would make a lousy mom. What if she always wanted to tell her children to be quiet? She knew that children couldn’t help but make a lot of noise.
Meg pushed her thoughts aside when she climbed into bed and cracked open her book. Before she knew it, she was swept away into the cozy English mystery.
When she finally looked at her watch, it was past midnight. She realized with surprise that she was hungry. Must be this country air. She closed her book and tiptoed down the hallway. Just as she reached the stairs, she thought she heard the sound of a child moaning. She paused and listened again. It seemed to be coming from Ashley’s room.
Meg crept down the hallway and peeked in the open door. The light from the hallway illuminated the room enough to see that Ashley was still tucked in just as she’d left her, and everything looked fine. But something drew Meg closer to the bed. She just wanted to make sure. She placed her hand on Ashley’s forehead again. This time she was shocked by the heat that radiated from it. This couldn’t be normal. Ashley moaned without moving, and her eyes remained closed.
Meg felt foolish as she knocked on Erin and Tom’s bedroom door. Surely she was blowing this all out of proportion. Erin opened the door.
“I’m so sorry, Erin,” whispered Meg. “It’s probably nothing, but I heard Ashley moaning, and I went to check. And, well, she feels even hotter now than before. I hate to disturb you—”
Already, Erin was moving down the hall to Ashley’s room. She flicked on a small lamp and pressed her hand to Ashley’s cheeks, then against her forehead.
“She’s burning up with fever,” said Erin with a frown. In the brighter light, Meg could see that Ashley’s skin was pale except for two bright red blotches on her cheeks.
“What’s wrong?” asked Tom sleepily from the hallway.
“It’s Ash, Tom. She seems to be sick. Do you think we should call Dr. McGregor?”
Tom came into the room and gently touched Ashley’s arm. “Wake up, Ashley, honey. Tell Daddy what’s wrong.” He gently shook her, but the little girl didn’t open her eyes.
Erin gasped. “Something’s wrong, Tom. I’m calling the doctor right now.” She dashed from the room, and Tom turned to Meg.
“Can you get a wet washcloth? We’ll see if we can start cooling her down,” he said, peeling the quilt off. He fanned Ashley with his hands and spoke gently to her. Meg ran to the bathroom and quickly returned with a cold, wet cloth. As Tom placed it on Ashley’s head, Erin came in with the cordless phone in hand.
“Yes, Doctor,” she said in a trembling voice. “Tom is trying to cool her down right now. No, she isn’t waking up. What does that mean?” Erin listened for a moment, then cupped her hand over the mouthpiece and spoke with urgency. “Tom? Meg? The doctor wants to know if she’s had any other symptoms like headaches or soreness in her neck.”
Tom’s eyes grew wide. “She said it hurt to bend her neck when she was taking her bath. I wanted to rinse her hair for her.”
Erin quickly relayed this information to the doctor, then listened silently. “Thank you, Doctor. We’ll rush her right in.” Erin hung up. “We’ve got to get Ashley to the emergency room. The doctor won’t say what he thinks it is, but he wants her to come in right away. He said they’ll probably want to run some tests.”
“Oh, no!” Meg whispered. Erin’s expression was tight with worry.
Erin grabbed the quilt and pillow from the bed. Tom already had Ashley in his arms and was heading out the door.
“Can you stay and watch after the girls?” called Tom.
“Of course. Don’t worry about a thing.”
“Say a prayer, Meg,” pleaded Erin with fearful eyes.
Meg blinked back tears as she watched the red taillights pull out of the driveway, then disappear into the night. How quickly a perfect world could change. She wished she could have gone with them. She would have liked to hold Ashley’s hand, to run cool fingers over the little girl’s hot forehead. She had prayed once tonight. Now she would pray again.
TEN
At four o’clock, Meg finally gave up on sleep. Although it was still dark, she got up and quietly dressed, then tiptoed downstairs and sat in the dark kitchen, lit only by the small light above the range. She didn’t want to do anything to wake the girls. She wasn’t looking forward to telling them about Ashley. Several times she picked up the phone, but each time she replaced it, fighting the urge to phone the hospital. Why hadn’t they called? Maybe they were waiting until they found out something definite. Perhaps in this case, no news was good news. She moved into the living room and paced back and forth across the carpet, looking out the window and watching and waiting for the dark gray sky to gradually grow light. After what seemed to be a lifetime, the sky became a paler shade of gray, and her heart whispered another prayer for Ashley.
She could see the hands on the mantel clock now. It was almost time to get the girls up for school. She had decided that it would probably be best to send them off on their regular routine. She wasn’t sure why, but she didn’t think it would help anything for them to stay home and worry.
“Mommy?” called Jennifer’s voice from the top of the stairs.
Meg walked over and looked up. “Your mom and dad aren’t here right now, Jenny.”
“Where are they?”
Meg walked slowly up the steps. She still hadn’t planned what to say to the girls. “Is Hannah up yet?” she asked when she reached the landing.
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