Clay stood and stretched out his hand, feeling for something…anything. What exactly he was reaching for, he was unsure. There was no noise and absolutely no light, and he was unsure what to do next. He took a couple of very hesitant steps with his hands stretched out before him. He swung his right arm slowly to the side and then his left arm, making no contact with anything at all. He stood still, wondering what to do next. He took a deep breath and tried to picture the passageway, but all he could visualize was utter blackness. His heart started to race and he wanted to call out to Erika. Instead he took a deep breath and tried to compose himself. He could do this. What was it, a hundred feet? Erika said she’d be waiting at the end of the passage, but the trouble was that Clay couldn’t see what was ahead of him, and he didn’t know how to get there. He actually began to feel betrayed that she would leave him alone to flounder.
Clay started sidestepping in miniature steps to his right. He held his right arm out to the side and gradually worked his way toward what he believed would eventually be a wall. Minutes passed as Clay slowly shuffled no more than ten feet to the flat rock wall surface. When his hand touched rock, his legs seemed to give out and he sank to the cave floor. From there he inched his way forward, putting all his weight on his left hand and his knees, his right hand never losing contact with the wall. The only noise he could hear was the scraping of his knees and the deafening sound of his breathing. Why couldn’t he seem to get any oxygen? Where was the end? Why was it taking so long? Was he lost? Was he in danger? How did Erika expect him to find his way without any guidance? But he pressed on alone, determined to find the end of the corridor.
Ten to fifteen minutes later, though it seemed much longer to Clay, he literally bumped into Erika and gasped. He’d been so focused on making his own path that he’d actually forgotten she was there all the time, waiting. “You did it,” she whispered.
“Why was it so hard?” Clay whispered back as he held onto Erika like he was afraid she’d vanish once again.
“It’s always hard when you don’t know where you’re going and you try to make the journey on your own. When you’re not walking by faith, you stumble along on your hands and knees in fear of what you can’t see. What kind of way is that to live?”
“I wasn’t exactly enjoying myself,” Clay admitted.
“Here. Put your helmet back on, but don’t turn on the light. And here’s your flashlight. Hook it to your belt.” Clay did as he was told. “Now stand up and take hold of my hand.” She pulled him four or five steps to his right. “Hold your free hand out in front of you, okay?”
“Okay.”
“It’s still pretty dark, isn’t it?” There was that giggle again. “Let’s walk. Trust me, Clay. I’m here with you, and I know the way. You just hold on for the ride.” They began walking in silence at a casual but steady pace. After about thirty to forty steps, in about thirty seconds, Clay’s hand hit a wall and they stopped. Erika turned and flipped on her headlamp. “There. That wasn’t so hard was it?”
Clay also turned and looked at the passage that they had just navigated. It was wide open. No rock outcroppings, nothing in the path, smooth walls and floor—just as he now remembered seeing it after they had dropped from the wall at the other end. “I feel like such a fool,” Clay confessed. “Do you mind if I keep hold of your hand and trust you the rest of the way?”
“I don’t mind at all, but there are still lessons to learn, Clay. Flip your light on and help me over this wall too.”
***
It appeared to Marshall Mortonson that Logan rolled his eyes when Marshall’s car pulled up at the school to pick him up. His head dropped and he walked the twenty-five or thirty feet about a foot and a half per step. He plopped down in the front passenger seat without so much as a “hello.”
“Hi, Logan,” Morty said with as much enthusiasm as he could muster.
“Hey.”
“You don’t look too happy.”
“Nope.”
Morty hesitated but then asked where he’d like to eat. All he got was a shrug of his shoulders. “Well, obviously we don’t have much to choose from since there’s only McDonald’s, Wendy’s, and Subway in Durand. Let’s go to McDonald’s…unless you’d like someplace else.” Another shrug of the shoulders. The kid sure knew how to make a person uncomfortable. His father was good at that too, he thought. Except his father did it in a much different way.
They ordered their meal and found a table in the corner away from everyone else. “Why does my mom think I need a babysitter?”
“Hmmm…a regular conversation starter, this one,” Morty thought, but he figured he’d better take advantage of actual words coming from Logan’s mouth. “Maybe she just wants you to have some company. Since your father disappeared, you…”
“I hated him,” Logan interrupted. That was all he said.
“Um, well, a lot of people felt the same way, Logan. But people love your mother, and we all want to help the two of you.”
“Why did other people hate him?”
“He was my best friend, but he was running the business into the ground with his wild living, and in the process, he hurt a lot of people. He put people out of business, offended, cheated, embarrassed, and took advantage of people. From where I sat, he didn’t treat people with respect and didn’t mind hurting them if he thought it benefited himself. I’m sorry to tell you that.” He paused. “Logan, why did you hate him?”
He simply shrugged his shoulders again. He wasn’t willing to say.
***
When Clay dropped to the other side of the wall, he expected to see another passage similar to the one they had just vacated. Instead, there was a series of structures that they had to spot and assist each other to climb and descend. Occasionally formations were too steep, too high, or too treacherous to climb, and in those occasions they were forced to crawl through a freezing channel of running water beneath the cave walls. The way was getting more and more difficult to navigate, but Clay, wet and unsure of himself, did his best to keep up with the ball of energy that was leading the way. After descending a particularly dangerous drop, it appeared that they had reached a dead end. Clay assumed that Erika would lead the way back up the structure they had just dropped from, but she had no intention of retreating. As far as Clay could see, the only way forward was a waterway near the base and along the side of a huge stalagmite. There was only a clearance under the rock of about a foot and a half, maybe less, and when Clay tested it, there was about six inches of standing water. Erika sat down on a rock and smiled as Clay bent over and shined his light below the rock.
“What do you see?” she asked.
“Well, it appears to be a narrow passage filled with water that goes under this rock about maybe fifteen feet or so. We’re heading back, right? I mean there’s no other way to pass unless we crawl under.” Erika just smiled while Clay began to comprehend what she was thinking. “You’re planning to crawl under, right?” That would be absurd, Clay immediately deduced, but Erika simply continued to smile. She was wet and dirty, her curly blond locks damp and hanging over her eyes, which coincidentally were not making any eye-contact with Clay in case he had any ideas of telling her what to do next. “Erika, listen. I’ve crawled through freezing water several times to get to this point, but never while smashed between two giant rocks. I don’t think I can fit through there.” Clay was starting to feel desperate. “Tell me you’re not gonna ask me to squeeze through that opening? Please?”
Erika just continued to smile. She had beautiful, pearly white teeth. What a dumb thing to notice, Clay thought, when I’m about to die.
“It’s like this,” Erika explained. “I’m your guide, and this is the way I’m leading you out of the cave. I told you that there were lessons still to be learned and you said you were gonna trust me the rest of the way. So, now’s the time to trust me. You can fit through that opening, so except for the fact that the water’s gonna be bitterly cold, you’ll have no problem getting throu
gh.”
“I hate cold water,” Clay complained, but Erika took it as a good sign that the complaint wasn’t about the size of the opening.
“Let’s see. You’re about six feet two inches, 195 pounds. That’s about twice as big as me; I hope you don’t get stuck,” she giggled. “Follow me.” She ducked her head, and started wiggling through the water. Clay began to panic again, but he got down on his knees, ducked his head, and plunged into the water. He gasped at the temperature. There was probably ten inches of clearance for him to breathe, but each time he tried to push himself forward using his knees, he banged his back on the rock. He began to feel claustrophobic because the farther he pushed himself the lower the rock ceiling became. It had dropped maybe three inches before he emerged from the crack that he was half swimming, half crawling through. There had barely been enough room to keep his face above the water and breathe. Erika was sitting on a rock with her helmet in hand when Clay dragged himself out of the water. He looked around and was shocked to see that they were trapped between two walls. The rock ceiling in front of them appeared to be lower yet.
“You’ll need to take your batteries out of the headlamp and give them to me. I’ll put ’em in this watertight bag. The last leg of the journey is too tight a fit for you to wear the helmet. You’ll have to hold it in front of you while you squirm through the last fifteen to twenty feet.”
“How will I see?”
“Well, that’s where you’re gonna have to trust me when I tell you that you can make it through. You aren’t going to be able to see, and the ceiling is gonna gradually drop from about thirteen inches to approximately eight. The water’ll remain at about six inches deep. The helmet won’t fit through on your head, so hold it out in front of you and use your other hand to help push yourself through. Your flashlight is water tight, but I honestly don’t see how you can hold it and use it. You’re gonna have to make it through in the dark.”
“You’re kidding right? I can’t fit through an eight-inch opening. And it’s filled with water. I’ll drown. And if I can’t see, how will I know how far I have to go and when I’m through?”
“Believe me. You’ll know when you’re through…plus I’ll have a light on when you get there. And you’ll have to trust me also when I tell you that you can fit. You won’t drown—not if you care to survive. Clay, this is the way out, the last leg of the journey. This is where you’re gonna have to have the most faith. There’s room for you to move side-to-side. You won’t be completely hemmed it. It’s just that the ceiling’s very low—as low as eight inches for the last eight or ten feet—and the water fills most of the opening. Keep your face turned up and keep moving. I’ll have you tie this rope under your armpits and if you stop moving, I’ll pull you through. The only obstacle is fear. Franklin Roosevelt once said ‘Let me assert my firm belief that the only thing we have to fear is fear itself—nameless, unreasoning, unjustified terror which paralyzes the effort needed to convert retreat into advance.’ At no time does that quote apply more than at this moment. Bigger men than you have made it through this opening. You’ll have to trust me about that. You can’t be afraid; you can’t retreat.”
“What are you trying to prove to me, Erika? This isn’t fun. This is life and death.”
“Clay, you’ve had the power most of your life to control things. In the living out of that life, you have developed the habit of trusting only in yourself. It’s time for you to learn to let go. You’re never gonna experience life like a normal person because you have a gift that isn’t normal, but you can begin to experience life differently than you have in the past. You have to put some faith in something besides yourself—whether that be God or people that you care about. It’s time you took a step of faith and trusted in someone else. You can make it through this, and then maybe you can move on with your life and experience it fully—experience it abundantly. I’m going through, Clay, and you need to come too.”
“Okay, so I believe that I can make it because you say I can, but believing doesn’t get me through the opening. What if I really can’t do it?”
“You can either show me your faith by what you say, or you can show me by what you do. Faith isn’t a concept….It’s an action verb. Get on your chest, stick your face in the water, and make it to the other side.”
Erika moved to loop her rope around Clay, but he stopped her. “I’ll do it without the rope.”
“That’s the spirit.” She smiled her awesome smile once again, stuffed the rope into her bag, and lowered herself into the water.
Terrified but determined, Clay left his flashlight on but inserted it into his belt knowing that he needed to keep his hands free but hoping that at least a bit of light would mar the blackness. He took a deep breath and crawled into the water. It was freezing. His plan was to hold his breath and scoot along on his belly as fast as he could manage, but his heart was beating so fast and the water was so cold that he was out of breath in just a few seconds. Only the top half of his frame was under the rock before he had to lift his head out of the water and take several breaths. His body was already getting numb and he felt like he was going to hyperventilate. He took as deep a breath as he could manage and scooted a couple more feet, but the movement managed to turn his flashlight off and he was plunged into absolutely complete darkness.
He felt the same disorientation that he felt while trying to walk from one end of the tunnel to the other in the dark. How was he to know if he was even going in the right direction? He needed another breath, so he lifted his head as high as he could and banged it on the rock ceiling so hard that he was certain that he had drawn blood. From the overhead rock to the floor beneath, there was approximately a ten-inch clearance. Water filled his mouth and he coughed and choked slightly. Anxiety and fear began to take over, but as he wondered if he would make it out alive, his mind began to spin. “Faith is the substance of things hoped for and the evidence of things unseen…the only thing we have to fear is fear itself…it’s time for you to let go…it’s time you took a step of faith and trusted in someone else…stop trusting only in yourself…show me by what you do.” Erika’s words started to flood Clay’s mind, and he realized that he was moving along in a regular pattern, a couple of short pulls forward, a turn of the head for a breath, a couple more pulls forward, another breath. He was making progress even as the gap tightened to no more than eight inches. “Trust me…You can’t be afraid; you can’t retreat…When you’re not walking by faith, you stumble along on your hands and knees in fear of what you can’t see. What kind of way is that to live?...I don’t think your problem is that you have a gift, Clay. I think you’re a person who is lacking faith.”
Clay slid forward another foot or so and turned his head for another breath. His head turned freely and didn’t bang into rock. His head was out of the passage! A renewed energy possessed him as he slid the rest of his body out of the enclosure. He had made it! As he was standing, a light flipped on. Clay smiled and climbed completely out of the water. He put his arms around Erika and lifted her off the ground in the most genuine hug he had ever given. Erika giggled that sexy laugh she had used several times that day. “I didn’t think I was going to make it,” he told Erika. “But I started flashing back to your words. I made it because you said I could and I trusted you.”
“You trusted me,” Erika repeated proudly. “How do you feel about that?”
“I feel great—well, I’m freezing to death, and my head hurts, but otherwise I feel great!”
She grabbed his arm, and they starting walking up a steep walkway toward the cave exit. The polypro started to warm his body, but it was Clay’s heart that was truly warming up. He had a lot to think about—things he’d learned and things he needed to work on, but his faith had been stirred by Erika, and now he knew he had some things to do. It was time that he used his gifts to help someone else, and according to Zander Frauss, there was a mystery to be solved, and Erika and her son were in need of some aid themselves.
Chapter 7
Clay had dropped off Erika and was stopped at a train crossing waiting for the longest train he’d ever seen, so he checked his cell phone and saw that he had a message from Tanner. He couldn’t get his mind off the events of the day, but mostly he couldn’t get his mind off Erika. The message said to call right away, so he speed dialed Tanner.
“Hi, Dad. How was your day?”
“Pretty memorable, to say the least, but I’ll tell you about it later. What’s up?”
“Well, Dr. Frauss told me a little more about your caving adventure, and we were discussing the mystery surrounding the train wreck in Durand. We talked about the news articles some more, and then he told me about some things he had learned about the Depot. Anyway, last night I had another one of my dreams, and there was a picture calling to me.”
“A picture? How would you ever find a picture?”
“I think my dream located it for me. As it played out, it kind of closed in right on the picture. First there were railroad tracks and a train. I had to wait for the train to pass before the vision continued. Then it zoomed in on a building. It was a huge two-and-a-half story building with pointed peaks that were like turrets on a castle. It was roofed in red, claylike tiles. I looked up the Durand Depot, Dad, and it looked just like my dream, so I’m sure the picture is in that building. When the vision zoomed inside, I saw something like museum exhibits, but right at the entrance to the Depot, the vision went to the right and eventually down a hall and up a set of winding stairs. There was a long hallway with framed displays on the walls and then some offices. In the second office on a wall to the right was a family picture of a man, woman, and boy. It was that picture that was calling to me.”
“Do you have any idea from the dream why the picture was calling to you?”
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