The card slipped from my fingers and fell next to Tony. I held my hands over my mouth and sank into the backseat, wishing I could rewind to last Saturday and do it all over again.
“Why didn’t he tell me?” I said through my fingers. “Why didn’t he tell me any of it?”
Tony shrugged one shoulder. “It isn’t easy to admit you’ve put somebody in a wheelchair, even if it was an accident. He kept searching for the right time to tell you … but he couldn’t find it.”
I recalled an early morning when Alex and I had sat in his car in front of my building. I want to tell you something important, he’d said. But he didn’t. And I hadn’t caught on when I asked him if the scar on his stomach still hurt. Always, he’d told me.
“And then this happened,” Tony went on. “The only reason he kept Mike a secret is that he didn’t want you to think badly of him.”
I shook my head. “I never would have.”
Tony looked at me the way he used to, like he could see who I truly was instead of who I’d been lately. “I know that.”
I held my head in my palms. “Why didn’t you tell me? You were my friend.”
“Yeah,” he said. “But I’m his, too.”
I looked up and into his face, and I was sorry for telling him that he didn’t know the first thing about being a friend. He knew so much more than I ever had.
*
Tony drove away, and I held my hem above the steps as I headed toward The Plaza. Jack was waiting for me at the entrance, which had three gold doors with flags above them that sagged in the still air. When I reached him, he bent his elbow to form a right angle like gentlemen do at weddings and in old movies.
“Ready?” he said with a smile that would’ve seemed captivating to anyone but me.
I shook my head, glancing at people swerving around us as they headed into the hotel. Jack seemed confused again, his arm dropped to his side, and I led him to a corner where we were out of everyone’s way.
“Jack,” I began, “when you checked into that rumor you’d heard about Alex … did you do it because you wanted to help me or because you wanted to hurt him? And were you truly sorry to be the one to tell me?”
He stuffed his hand into his pocket and jangled the change inside. “What do you mean?”
“You know what I mean. And since your sources are so reliable, I have a feeling you also know Mike Neill died on Sunday.”
He gazed out at the street. “Yes,” he said. “I do.”
“Did you know he was the reason Alex didn’t show up for our date last Saturday?”
“Not until later,” he said, looking at me again.
I shook my head and crossed my arms. “But you still didn’t tell me.”
He stared at my face for a moment before he caressed my shoulder through my shawl. “Don’t get yourself worked up, honey … especially when you’re looking so beautiful. And please don’t be angry with me. Everything I did was for your own good.”
For my own good. That gave me a chill. It was something Ned would say.
“Savannah,” Jack went on, “the reason I had Alex investigated is because I saw you with him at Kitty’s party and I was worried. He isn’t the type of man you should be involved with. You’re miles above him … and he just isn’t good enough for you.”
“You’re wrong,” I said. “I’m no better than he is.”
Jack slid his hand from my shoulder to my wrist, which he held gently between his fingers. “It’s sweet of you to think that way … but it’s also naïve. As smart as you are, you’re still very young … and inexperienced with men.”
I wondered if he’d sent a detective down south to interrogate Jamie and round up every guy I’d gone out with to find out exactly how inexperienced I was. Or maybe someone had been watching 15 Central Park West with binoculars and reported that Alex came to my apartment at night but didn’t leave until morning and Jack just couldn’t let it go on.
“Well,” I said, “did you investigate that, too?”
He shook his head. “I figured it out when you were in my bedroom.”
My lips tightened. I was sorry I’d ever set foot in his bedroom.
“And,” Jack continued, “it’s one of the reasons I was looking out for you. I couldn’t just stand around and let you get dragged down by a guy like Alex. He’s going nowhere.”
I shook my head. “That isn’t true. He wants to be—”
“I know,” Jack said with a roll of his eyes. “He wants to be an actor and a writer. But all he’s accomplished is putting a man in his grave.”
“That was an accident,” I said.
Jack shrugged. “It doesn’t change the fact that he ended someone’s life.”
Jack said that so smugly, so self-righteously. “You misled me,” I said. “You used the accident against Alex and let me go on believing he stood me up for no good reason.”
“Because,” Jack said in an irritatingly calm voice, “I thought the truth might hurt you more. I was trying to protect you.”
I scoffed. “Protect me? You can’t be serious,” I said so loudly that guests filing into The Plaza were beginning to stare.
Jack glanced at them and back at me. “I’m very serious,” he said, pushing a stray lock of hair away from my eyes. “If Alex can paralyze a fighter with his bare hands, imagine what he might do to you if you ever made him mad. And judging from that fiery temper of yours, you could set him off quite easily.”
Jack chuckled and tweaked my nose. That had seemed cute when he did it at my apartment door, but not now. Now it was infuriating, and I had to get out of there before I committed my second act of battery.
“I’m finished with you,” I said, turning toward the entrance.
Jack caught my arm, and I whirled around. “Okay,” he said, sounding close to running out of patience. “All right. You’ve made your point. I understand why you’re upset. Maybe I should’ve been more honest with you. But other than that, I didn’t do anything wrong.”
I just stared at him, amazed that he thought he hadn’t done anything wrong. He seemed to believe it was perfectly acceptable to use a tragedy to beat out the competition, especially if the competition wasn’t in his tax bracket. He’d eliminated Alex just as easily as he would have made Tony lose his job, and he’d given as little thought to their feelings as Ned had given to Kitty and Ainsley.
“Do you mean,” I said, “that you think it’s okay to step on people to get what you want?”
His features hardened. “I don’t look at it that way, Savannah. And I don’t like being judged, either. As you get older and spend more time working at your father’s company … you’ll understand why the rules need to be bent once in a while to protect what you care about.”
He was so disgustingly like Ned, giving me a lesson in Business 101. But maybe that shouldn’t have surprised me, since they were best friends. I doubt he’s any better than Ned, Tony had told me. I wished I’d taken that into consideration earlier, and I shouldn’t have let Ned convince me to stick with men who had money. It didn’t make things easier at all.
I folded my arms across my chest. “What happened,” I said, “wasn’t business. I’m not one of your real estate deals, Jack.”
“Of course you aren’t,” he said smoothly, like he wanted to relax me, but it didn’t work. I was livid, and I remembered Tony telling me that Jack had given him a shady vibe and Tina saying, I wouldn’t think too highly of a man who’s so easily swayed. It’s a bad indication of his character. If I’d only listened. “Let’s not make a big thing out of this, okay? It’s so unimportant. Besides, we’re here for a party. We should forget what happened and move on.” He offered me his arm again. “Let’s just go inside.”
I backed up. “You have ways of getting what you want. Isn’t that right? That’s what Angelique told me when I ran into her at Le Bernardin. She said she knows you well, and I guess that’s true. I wonder if it’s the reason she didn’t accept that expensive engagement ring.”
> I lifted my hem and headed toward the door, but he got in the way.
“Take it easy,” he said in that gentle, soothing voice he’d been using on me all along. “You’re blowing this way out of proportion. Come on, now … you know I’m a nice guy.”
He smiled. Maybe he thought his looks and his charm and those dimples in his cheeks would make me melt into his arms and forget everything, but they didn’t.
I peered into his hazel eyes. Tonight was the first time I’d been able to see through them.
“You know something, Jack? I’ve finally realized you’re the one who just isn’t good enough for me.”
*
I left Jack on the steps and rushed into The Plaza, beneath chandeliers and past gilded walls toward the Grand Ballroom, which had arched windows and tables with gorgeous centerpieces made of flowers and lit candles, and everything was awash in rose-tinted light. I glanced around, hoping to spot Alex standing behind a bar in his black shirt and white tie just the way I’d found him. But he wasn’t there, and I stood alone in the middle of the room while people veered around me, my body so limp that my shawl fell to the floor and stayed there until Fabian Spader picked it up.
“Bold choice,” he said, draping the shawl around my shoulders. “But I already know how daring you are. Word on the street is that you’re the one who outed Caroline Stone.”
He’d halfway complied with tradition tonight. He was in a tux, but his cummerbund and bow tie had a loud zebra print. “That isn’t true,” I said.
He tossed his hair. “Maybe not … but since you and Caroline were whispering all sorts of secrets at Kitty’s last birthday, I can’t imagine you didn’t know everything before it hit the Net. Yet for some odd reason, you chose not to tell me. And you continue to keep things from me, even after I gave you that smashing write-up on my blog. I didn’t get a word of thanks.”
He was wearing the most pungent cologne, which sparked a pain at the back of my head.
“Thank you,” I made myself say.
He shrugged. “I’m afraid it’s too late for that … and you don’t seem to understand how things work around here. When I give you something, you’re supposed to give me something. I made you famous, and you need to pay me back with information about the Stones. Everyone’s sick of hearing about all the shenanigans Edward was up to before he expired, Caroline’s fifteen minutes are done … and I suspect there’s more salaciousness in your family to entertain the masses.” He took a step closer and rubbed his knuckles beneath his pointy chin. “You see, Savannah … I’ve had my fill of kissing Virginia’s regal ass. If you agree to give me a steady supply of accurate information, it would advance my career and keep your reputation pristine.”
I shook my head. “I said thank you for the write-up. That’s all you’re going to get.”
I whirled around and walked away, and then I saw Kitty coming toward me with Ned. He was in a tux and she wore a black dress, and she seemed surprised that I hadn’t worn one too. But she didn’t say anything—she just glanced around and asked about Jack.
“He told me you invited him,” she said.
“And then I uninvited him. It’s complicated, Kitty … I’ll explain later.”
A woman passing by with a champagne glass in her hand caught Kitty’s arm and started gabbing in her ear. They headed toward a table where waiters were serving salads, and Ned looked down at me as we trailed behind.
“Did you get dumped again?” he asked.
I didn’t answer. And I couldn’t stand the sound of his highbrow accent, especially when I was sitting at a round table with him and Kitty and Virginia and a few other guests. Virginia kept looking at my gown like it was one of those trashion dresses made from cut-up credit cards or used condom wrappers, but nobody seemed to notice her snooty stares—not even Kitty, who was caught up in Ned. She kept rubbing his back and squeezing his hand and it nearly made me retch, thinking about where that hand had been.
“Savannah,” Kitty said, leaning toward me when we were in the middle of the main course. She sat beside me, and Ned was next to her, and Virginia was on my left, cozying up to a man who seemed to be some sort of dignitary. “Good news: My doctor cleared me for IVF.”
My head snapped toward her. Virginia abandoned her conversation and looked at us.
“What was that?” she asked in her saccharine voice. “Something about IVF?”
Kitty cleared her throat. “I wasn’t planning to tell you for a while, Virginia, but—”
“You weren’t planning to tell me for a while? Yet you told Susannah, and—”
“Savannah,” I said, staring at my plate.
“—I can’t imagine why you’d reveal that information to a stranger before me.”
“Savannah isn’t a stranger,” Kitty said. “She’s Ned and Caroline’s sister.”
Virginia ignored that and adjusted her sapphire necklace. “Let’s return to a more important topic: You’re going to make another attempt at giving me a grandchild.”
“I’d phrase it differently,” Kitty said. “But that’s the idea.”
Virginia stroked her wavy hair. “Well, that’s good news,” she said with a phony smile. “Make sure you start soon, though … I know women wait forever to have babies these days, but I’d hate for you to be mistaken for a grandmother at your child’s high school graduation.”
Kitty stiffened beside me as Virginia went back to chatting with the man next to her. Then Kitty guzzled a glass of wine while she dragged her circle of diamonds back and forth on its chain and started talking to Ned about turning a guest room into a nursery.
This was unbearable. I couldn’t take it anymore. I couldn’t allow Kitty to stay trapped between a lying, cheating husband and an abusive monster-in-law. So I mustered my courage, clamped my fingers around Kitty’s wrist, and led her to a quiet corner away from all the tables.
“What are you doing?” she asked.
I decided to spit it out before I lost my nerve. “You can’t have a baby with Ned.”
She looked at me blankly, like she wasn’t sure whether that statement was an order or a premonition. She seemed not to know if she should laugh or panic. “What are you talking about?” she asked with a jittery titter. “Why would you say such a thing?”
My breath was coming in shaky spurts and my knees felt close to buckling, but I made myself keep going. “Because he cheated on you,” I said, “with Ainsley and Darcelle … and probably other women … I don’t know for sure.”
It was a relief to get those words out, but now that they rang in the air between me and Kitty I felt like my burden had been shifted to her shoulders, where it was infinitely heavier. Her throat moved like she was swallowing and her left eyelid twitched and she opened her mouth a little, but all that came out was half a gasp.
“You just found out about this?” she asked, her voice halting.
I shook my head. I couldn’t pretend anymore. “I’ve known about Ainsley since Monday, and I know Ned broke up with her recently … on a Saturday afternoon while you were at a hair appointment. She told me he picked you up afterward,” I said, and her eyes darted around the room as if it were covered in clues she hadn’t seen until now. “I caught him in the act with Darcelle a while ago. I made him send her to Moscow.”
Kitty’s brown eyes narrowed. “I brought you in. I helped you. I thought we were friends.…”
“We are,” I said as the stricken look on her face pierced my heart.
She shook her head. “A friend wouldn’t have kept this from me. Now I’m wondering if you were just trying to get on my good side so I’d ignore things that I wouldn’t with my other employees. The slacking off, the two-hour lunches—”
Maybe I had taken advantage. But it had nothing to do with this. “That isn’t true, Kitty. The reason I didn’t tell you about Ned is that I know you love him … or at least, who you thought he was. I didn’t want to ruin your marriage, and that’s why I tried to fix everything.”
“Fix
everything?” she said with a harsh laugh. “How? By turning me into a fool?!”
She’d said that loudly enough for people to hear, including Ned. He pushed back his chair and crossed the room, and then he was standing beside us, asking what was wrong. Kitty didn’t answer—instead she shoved him with both hands, but it only made him stumble slightly backward and skid on the slippery floor.
“Kitty,” he said in a controlled voice as he straightened up and smoothed his jacket and glanced at the growing audience. It included Fabian Spader, who was dangling his arm over the back of his chair while he sat beside his photographer. “I have no idea what’s going on, but please don’t make a scene. You know my family’s had enough bad press lately.”
“Maybe,” she said as she tried to twist her wedding ring off her finger. “But I’m not part of your family anymore. That ended when you betrayed me with my former friend and some little teenage intern. Savannah told me everything.”
His eyes burned with anger when they struck mine. He reached for Kitty’s hands, but she jerked them away as her ring came loose. She threw it at him; it bounced against his lapel, dropped to the floor, and skidded across the polished surface, spinning on its side. Then she yanked off her necklace, breaking the lock, and tossed it into a nearby trash can overflowing with soiled cocktail napkins.
Ned glanced at the diamonds sinking into a glob of ranch dressing. “Kitty,” he said, “what Savannah told you isn’t true … and surely you’re not going to take a stranger’s word over mine.”
She shook her head as her face reddened. “For the first time in a long time, I actually do know what I’m doing. I’d thought the way you treated Savannah wasn’t who you really are, but obviously I was wrong. I guess I don’t know you at all, and if anybody’s a stranger … it’s you.”
Tears welled in her eyes. She turned to walk away; he reached out and grasped her hand.
“Kitty,” he said again. “Don’t leave. Please.”
His voice was pleading, and I hadn’t expected that. Kitty sniffed and hardened her jaw. “You can find someplace else to sleep tonight,” she said. “I’m sure that’ll be easy for you.”
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