There, we also observed these enormous mounds. When asked what they be, a man native to the islands told us they were thought to be built by giants in accordance with the rising sun— as entrances to the magical Otherworld.
How captivating! Wonder what would it be like to cross through to the Otherworld? Perhaps, then someone may tell me where ‘tis I truly belong!
A couple of days into our stay, we took a smallish boat over to Inis Meadhóin. This centre island offers a picturesque contrasting landscape of rolling, verdant hills surrounded by beautiful marine life and clear waters.
‘Twas from there first I set me eyes upon Aillte an Mothair.
We ambled along the coast, with the sea at our right, and the ridge of the island with its long, sloping plains rushing down to meet the sea along our left. Brilliant white heads of lacy flowers swayed breezily in the sunshine that struck the water, blue-grey butterflies flitting about them.
Off in the distance, there be peculiar shadows of limestone outcroppings. Somewhat further over from that I saw them. Astonished I be I had not noticed them until that very moment, as now I held a crystal clear view of them.
Me face became glassy as I cried out, “Oh!”
The three of them stopped short and looked to me, probably expecting to see me falling into the sea or some other such mishap! They just stared at me, as I stood there motionless with me eyes open broadly and me mouth gaping.
“In God’s name, Aislinn, what is it?!” prodded Deirdre, concern in her voice.
Her words shaking me loose from me hypnotism, I held me arm out as long as it would reach, and whispered, “There! You see it?”
They all stood there looking out in the same direction as I pointed, yet not one of them did see them.
“Aislinn, just what it be?” Donovan enquired mildly. However, I could hear the frustration tainting his tone.
“Far out there, do you not see them?” Now I was beginning to feel a bit frustrated meself! “Titanic. Cliffs!” I did not fathom how ‘twas they could not see them!
They peered harder then and finally Deirdre, realizing what ‘twas I must be observing in the direction of the mainland remarked, “Oh! Those would be Aillte an Mothair!”
“Aillte an Mothair,” I repeated the words ponderously through me trance.
The lads both chimed in then, in recognition of the name, at least. Still not certain I be whether they ever actually saw them!
“Indeed, Aislinn! Have you not heard of them, then?” Deirdre asked, quite shocked.
When I shook me head, she pronounced, “That is a disgrace. After all, very near to your parents’ home they are. Cannot imagine you never embarking to see them!” She just stood there, shaking her head in disbelief.
Most enthralled I be!
There they were, rising magnificently against the breezy cool morning sky. A spectacular natural wonder— the series of dark limestone heads, in a rigid vertical formation majestically ascending hundreds of metres from the sea.
As I stood their absorbed in me awe, I aspired to visit them someday, and rather soon, I did wish!
I perceived Donovan gazing at me. I glanced over to him and smiled naturally. He returned a genuine smile, and I comprehended truly pleased he be to observe me so joyful.
That day, the four of us toured the island upon the backs of sturdy native ponies. Wonderfully quiet, flecked ‘twas with little fishing villages that have successfully withstood the elements fer centuries. Pace of life there be slow and gentle, timeless: the way it ought to be. A place you could spend forever merely immersing yerself within its simplicity.
Sincerely hoped I did that even when the West coast of Ireland inescapably wore away its refuge, these unique islands and its peoples would be spared the effects of the British subjugation.
That evening after we all did eat, I told Deirdre that Donovan and I would be taking a walk on our own. She smirked at me. “Very well, then. A proper lass you be now, Aislinn!” she warned playfully with an arch of her brow.
I simply frowned at her. “Indeed! You be the fine one to talk, Missy!” I retorted.
She quickly glanced about nervously to be sure Fergus not be within earshot before scolding me. “You promised you would keep your lips tight on that!”
“Not to worry, cousin, I would not dare breathe a word. I be knowing he not be near.” I told her, hoping to ease her misgivings.
“Indeed. Well, you have a lovely evening then. See you back at our room?”
I caught the undertone of her light question. “Naturally.” I assured her with a smile.
Seemingly satisfied, she smiled back. I sauntered over to meet Donovan at the front of the boarding house.
Greeting me with his lovely modest smile, he clutched me hand as we walked off the property into the open land. I smiled back at him, embarrassed by the customary frolicking of me heart at his mere touch.
It all began to feel entirely surreal, Donovan and I walking hand in hand together in this strangely beautiful place. I reminisced back on that fateful dream— then what seemed a lifetime ago— the years I waited all too impatiently fer him to notice me, to share me love.
Suddenly, he stopped and spun me toward him so quickly I did startle. And from his eyes sprung a well of love as fer the first time he uttered the words, “Aislinn, I lo . . .”
Though, miserably, I failed to hear him fer at that most inopportune moment, me startling prompted a sneeze! Feeling daft as usual, I replied “Sorry, what say you, Donovan?”
Yet in the very same second the words escaped me, I realised what ‘twas he had said. Those sweet words, a melody to me soul.
The sharpest gust of love shot through me, melting me heart. I thought it were not possible to love him more than I did those years before now, but in this actualized moment of reciprocated love, me feelings had reached a new height. I felt his love, as if it were reaching out to touch me.
“Oh, Donovan!” I threw me arms about him, the tears brimming in me eyes. “You cannot conceive of how long I have waited to hear those words come from yer lips!”
Our eyes met as I pulled back to look at him, his arms wrapping about me, not letting me go too far. Seeing the first tear seeping down me cheek, Donovan leaned forward and kissed it away. I closed me eyes as he did, and instead of pulling back again, he went on kissing down me cheek. When he reached the corner of me mouth, I sucked in me breath in anticipation of what be coming. Then he did move his lips to alight upon mine, pressing into them softly.
Fer so many years I had dreamt of this moment and now that ‘twas upon me, I felt as if I did not know what to do! Me lips quivered at the unbelievable feel of his lips upon them, patiently seeking an invitation to go further in. I willed the softening of me mouth, trying to follow along, as tenderly Donovan caressed them with his delectable lips. I felt the moment they let go of all their tension and gave in to his. Slowly I relaxed me mouth and beckoned him in.
How long we remained in that embrace, I do not know. Me head set off spinning so that it felt as though it were not attached to me body any longer. The rest of me body and me feet followed soon thereafter, ‘til I expected to open me eyes and find us floating away as a leaf upon the breeze.
Yet, open me eyes I could not as never had I felt so tranquil. I began to think I may well be sleeping and this all be an exceedingly delightful authentic dream! The tranquility spread ‘til it had permeated every cell of me body.
Never had I experienced something so euphoric before! The moment ‘twas broken, naturally, by me belly growling, something Donovan was becoming accustomed to handling when around me. Though slightly embarrassed, I disregarded it, not daring to call an end to the best moment ever I’d had. Another protest from me belly, though, and he broke away.
Grand! Donovan always has to be the gentleman!
His lips pulling away from mine only made me hunger more powerful; yet to gratify me belly, it did not aspire. This hunger be infinitely more ravenous, coveting to consume him throug
h his lips! Were Donovan to know how I felt, surely he would have turned and fled from me!
“So elated I be, ‘tis as if I be lost in some imaginary world! Never have I felt so brilliantly alive!” I beamed.
Absolutely delirious, I scampered off along the edge of the cliff, running until I ran out of breath. Donovan dashed after me and eventually grasped me, spinning us round and round ‘til we both fell down upon the grass laughing.
We passed the day talking. I revealed to him all me hopes and dreams. He stared at me absorbedly, listening with the utmost ardor, as though truly he did believe in me.
“That day at me father’s that you touched me hand, I think I knew you loved me then,” I confessed. I do believe the candid smile he gave me then confirmed the truth of that presumption.
“Aislinn, always have I loved you, since the day first I did see you in your father’s barn,” he avowed softly, stroking me cheek with his fingertips.
Since then? No, he couldn’t have . . .
I gazed at him with incredulity, me eyes searching his fer verification.
“Why then, did you hold me off fer so long?” I asked him, me mind trying to make sense of it.
“Oh, Aislinn. I knew there be something special about you, and desperately did I wish to become better acquainted with you, trust me.” His eyes were utterly sincere. “But, you were still so young. I had to wait.”
“Wait fer what, exactly?” I began to snap at him in me impatience. “I’ll have you know I had already waited years to merely lay eyes upon you!”
“Me apologies that you had to wait longer than I,” Donovan turned down his eyes, abashed. “But I had to do it right, wait fer you to be of the proper age. I hoped to gain your father’s approval . . .” he tried to rationalize, trailing off.
“Why is everyone always so overly concerned with being proper?” I exasperated. “Can we not simply do what we feel?”
“’Tis just the way things be, Aislinn.” Donovan stroked me hand as if appeasing a child. “What kind of world would we live in if everyone were to act upon their feelings?”
His touch, it goes deeper still, to the very heart of me.
“Happier, doubtless!” I retorted. “I just don’t see what would be so wrong with it!”
Donovan gazed at me and sighed, patting me hand. I sensed he had nothing left to say on the matter. And that be fine with me. I wished to simply be with him.
Today ‘tis right here with you that I belong. ‘Tis only when I be with you I be whole again. Being alone with you is as coming home fer the first time. All I could want is fer it to remain as this. You and me alone, a secret kiss. Let us never go home! Don’t let this end, please let us stay!
“You and I are the world! The two of us is all there be,” I squealed, spinning him round. “The rest merely be an illusion. Nothing else be real. ‘Tis as though nothing were ever truly real ‘til there be us!”
Delighted I be that he became captured by me zeal. Clutching me firmly to him, he called, “We are on the edge of a truly beautiful thing, Aislinn!”
“Vow that always we will remember what it be to feel this alive! Surrendering ourselves to these reminiscences. Fer then we may remain right here evermore, never to bid farewell!” I cried.
Thus, Donovan and I held onto each other as we watched as the red sun descended beyond the deep green sea. Listening to the sounds of the sea we tried to sing along. We observed the dolphins as they frolicked through the water; the seafowl flying directly above, scanning the sea fer salmon. Tasting the salty spray of the crisp sea breeze upon me tongue, me heart soared as high as the waves booming high above.
Wretchedly, ‘twas then that other, most unwelcome thoughts began to take hold of me, threatening it all crash down on me.
“Why be you so far away, me love?” Donovan queried, his tone compassionate. His hand caressed mine.
Questioningly, me eyes flitted to him, confounded by his enquiry.
“Your eyes have been rather far away fer quite a while,” he softly clarified.
I gazed so deep into his light eyes, beautifully reflecting the waters, softly glimmering in the twilight of the ruby sunset. “’Tis exceedingly beautiful and so are you, Donovan.” I described. “You be just as a dream. Only I fear tomorrow I may wake up and discover only dreamt this all I did!”
“Will ever you not simply trust that I be in love with you? ‘Tis you I have been searching fer. And ‘tis completely real I be! This all be real!” Donovan assured me.
“I have been waiting fer you, waiting fer you longer than you truly know.” I told him, the underlying pain in me voice evident.
Donovan gazed upon me inquisitively, striving to comprehend whatever ‘twas affected me so. “Pray, let me see you smile again, just as the little child,” he encouraged. “I live to see that smile upon your face, Aislinn.”
“Be gentle with me, with me heart.” I pleaded, burying me face in the fragrant warmth of his chest.
“So delicate you be, me Aislinn,” Donovan whispered holding me close to him. “Just as a newborn babe in me arms.” I melted as he stroked me hair.
“Never, never, never let me go!” I cried, burrowing deeper against him. “Hold me just as this fer all infinity!”
“I’ll keep holding you in me arms so near to me, Aislinn, never will I let you slip away!” Donovan promised fervently.
All I have ever wanted was to be held safe in his arms. Me lips to breathe his name. Now, at last, here we be, everything fer which I have desired, and I be set on ruining it! What ever be the matter with me? Funny ‘tis, this thing that is love, with its strange highs and strange lows.
“The view is beautiful, and tonight ‘tis ours alone,” Donovan finally agreed.
“I love you, Donovan,” I told him belatedly, snuggling into his warmth. He squeezed me and kissed the back of me hair in response.
We sat, observing how the shadows from the breaking waves melted the light across the water, softly shining in our eyes.
Here as this with you beneath the stars, Oh, wouldst you whisper to me a wish that we might drift away tonight?
‘Twas then a sudden isolated gust passed directly above me head and with it an eerie feeling did wash through me triggering from me a shudder.
“Suppose we should be going back in now,” Donovan stated with concern rubbing me arm, though his voice be reluctant. “Wouldn’t want you catchin’ yer death out here!”
Though I knew it were not the cold which had affected me, I nodded, pressing me face into him.
Before turning to go, I glanced out once more. I thought me eyes must surely be deceiving me, fer I swore I glimpsed a man, his gaze affixed upon me. And then, not a moment later, as a glowing pearl upon the starlit sea, an orb of light did rise off the water from where I be certain he had been and rushed onward toward where we stood.
Yet another chain of chills rushed through me as seemingly the light passed right through me form.
The rest of that night, I could not seem to break free of the disturbing sense that anomalous incident had stirred within me. And at the same time, peculiarly, I did feel an overcoming sense of intrigue.
Once more, I wished to sneak down the hall to Donovan’s room. Except, this time I wished only to be hidden within the shelter in his arms.
Chapter Ten
The dream it came during the overnight preceding me birthday, the first of May.
‘Tis twilight and deep in the wood I be, surrounded by a group of beautiful women. Adoringly, they bathe me in the soothing warm water dissolved with nourishing salts and scented oils. Their hands be gliding all over me body, caressing me, as they devotedly cleanse me skin. Occasionally a hand would be replaced with a mouth somewhere upon me.
Eventually, all of the hands be exchanged with the mouths and tongues of these women: upon me face, neck, ears, arms, shoulders, breasts, back, and belly. Cravings which never I have experienced before flow through me.
Reluctantly, the women help me from the b
ath washbasin, drying leisurely me form with soft linens. Specific attention they grant to the area hidden away within me thighs. Each female awaits her turn to meticulously examine me flesh with her fingers and then leans forth her face and with her tongue, methodically tastes of me to endorse me purity.
Twelve females replicate this routine. I be virtually ready to succumb to this beyond arduous etiquette, me legs beginning to tremble, threatening to give way beneath me, me mind growing blissfully foggy. ‘Tis rather discontented I be when they conclude this rite.
They commence to dressing me in a glorious translucent, flowing white gown. One woman lovingly places a wreath of flowers around me neck, kissing me delicately upon the lips. The others busy themselves with weaving dainty white flowers throughout me bountiful locks. I feel deeply mystified, me head still hazy, having still not the knowledge of the purpose fer me presence here. Nonetheless, by this point little care have I fer that.
Near dark ‘tis now. I hear the chanting of many male voices from the field outlying the wood:
“I now do call upon the eternal God in the ancient way,
as Young Lord and Oak King— Horned One of the Forests.
I bid Ye welcome and ask Thee to come forth and join
Thy Lady Goddess in the Holy Rite of Sacred Union.
As it is willed, so mote it be!”
I overhear the enthusiastic hailing of many people fer several seconds before the chanting resumes:
“I now do call upon the eternal Goddess in the ancient way,
as Lovely Maiden, Mother and Crone— Three-fold Goddess be.
I bid Ye welcome and ask Thee to come forth and join Thy Lord God
in the Holy Rite of Sacred Union. As it is willed, so mote it be!”
Upon hearing this, the women saunter me out amongst the large crowd and toward a massive stone altar in the midst. The altar be adorned in petals and surrounded with green and white candles. They lay me back upon it gently. Me hair be so long that its locks be flowing beautifully all about me and reaching halfway down the stone. The cloth of me gown, glowing silvery in the light of the full moon, likewise be spilling down all about the stone, as a cochall.
Cailín (Lass) (Anam Céile Chronicles) Page 10
