by Strauss, Lee
“What is it?” Sebastian prodded.
“Just some notes, a few lines about an idea I had. More like a concept, really.”
“Okay?”
“I was thinking about how humans are made up of more than just flesh and bone. That there must be something beyond…” She motioned to her bad leg. “…this.”
Sebastian nodded and when he didn’t say anything Eva hurried to fill in the silence. “I guess it’s something I think about a lot, considering. We can scrap it if you don’t like it.”
“No, it’s a good concept.” He passed her the guitar. “Show me what you have so far?”
She accepted the instrument. “It’s not much yet.” She strummed a shuffle beat and hummed a melody idea, and then she sang softly.
I can’t say what lies beyond my flesh and bone,
But for the pull here beneath
We reach to the sky
Here like shadows moving transience
Turning the fallow
Or building the gallows
To the certain uncertainty
Like an unremembered memory
She covered the strings with her palm. “That’s all I have so far. It’s not a rock song…”
He chuckled. “I can turn anything into a rock song. I like the groove. I was worried it would be mopey, but it comes across as an honest question.”
She cocked her head. “Rather than preaching?”
His lip tugged up crookedly. “Well, the subject matter… along with your family’s influence…”
“What do you mean by that?”
“Nothing, just that I’m not religious.”
“Me neither.”
He balked. “You don’t believe in God?”
“I never said that. I said I wasn’t religious… in the sense that I’m not bound by the laws and beliefs of a particular denomination.”
Sebastian’s gaze narrowed, and his lips parted like he was going to respond, but then he stood and crossed the room. He picked up a second acoustic guitar. “I have some ideas.”
He shared a few lines and Eva wrote them down. She added a couple. Sebastian played a harmony riff when they tested them out. Some lines, they agreed, needed to be crossed out and a couple they deliberated over.
When it occurred to Eva to check her phone for the time, she stammered, “Two hours! I have to go.”
“Wow.” Sebastian leaned back and said with a lazy grin, “You’re on a tight leash. How old did you say you were?”
Eva swallowed a wad of embarrassment. He knew how old she was. “Don’t judge me.”
“Okay, sorry. It’s just that I’m excited with the momentum we’ve got going.”
“Yeah, well,” she said coolly. She handed the guitar to Sebastian’s outstretched hand and reached for her cane on the floor. She hated the way Sebastian watched her slow movements and how she felt his eyes on the back of her head as she limped to the door. He had no idea what it was like to be her. No idea.
“Eva?”
She turned slowly and caught his eye.
“I’m sorry. I don’t mean to be a jerk.”
He could be such an a-hole. Here she’d come, acting against her family’s approval, just to help him write a dumb song, and he had to go and make her feel stupid. He needed to make it up to her somehow. He didn’t want her to feel like he was using her.
Was he?
No. They’d share songwriting credits. If it became a hit for Hollow Fellows, she’d make a lot of money. He was doing her the favor.
Still, she didn’t seem to care about the money, and he could totally picture her quitting on him. She wasn’t the one who needed a partner to write.
Eva Baumann was the best thing to happen to him in a long time. He enjoyed her company. She was smart and talented, and her innocence was refreshing. When the guitar was on her lap, covering her leg, it was easy to forget she was handicapped.
And she was cute. The way her eyes sparkled when they came up with just the right line, and the little lilt to her laugh. It was easy to be with her. No expectations. No drama.
Except for when he stupidly caused it.
Maybe he should take her out. Not on a date, just as friends. Somewhere nice. Somewhere she probably never goes. He drummed his fingertips on the tops of his thighs.
There was a tap on the door and he sprang to his feet to get it. Had Eva forgotten something?
He hurried to answer it but it wasn’t the sweet face of Eva Baumann on the other side. It was the pinched face of Yvonne.
Sebastian huffed. “What are you doing here?”
Yvonne smiled like he’d just hit on her. She was dressed in short shorts and a revealing T-shirt. She tucked her short hair, tinted blue now, behind her studded ears and looked up at Sebastian from heavily made-up eyes. “I came to see you. We’re still friends aren’t we? She seductively outlined the peacock tattoo with her fingernail, a move that had once turned him on.
He tugged his arm away. “You should go.”
“Basti, let’s be adults here.” She strutted over to an armchair, slouched into it and draped a bare leg over the arm. “I know you’re angry, and rightly so, but nothing actually happened between Karl and me.”
“I saw you kissing him.”
“Yeah, okay. We kissed. But we never went beyond that.”
Sebastian leaned against the wall and crossed his arms. “Why should I believe you?”
“Because it’s true. Besides, it didn’t mean anything.”
Maybe not to her, but it sure did to him. “It doesn’t matter. You lied to me so you could be with him instead. That speaks volumes.”
Yvonne pushed herself gracefully off the chair and walked toward him. “It was stupid, and I’m so, so sorry.”
“I know. You told me that already.”
“I just feel so bad. I heard the band broke up?”
“We’re on hiatus.”
She stepped closer. He could smell the hair products in her hair. “I feel responsible.”
He kept his arms folded tight against his chest, a barrier. “You did have something to do with it.”
Yvonne placed a manicured hand on his arm. “Basti.” Her painted nails crawled up to the soft skin of his neck. She whispered, “Are you sure we can’t start over? Just forget this ever happened?”
“Pretty sure.”
She let her arm fall. “Don’t tell me there’s someone else already.”
Eva’s lips crossed Sebastian’s mind, but he shook the thought away. “No. I’m just not interested in you anymore.”
It was harsh, but it was true. Seeing her now and knowing she would follow him into the bedroom at the flick of a finger, it didn’t stir anything in him. Her face blushed with embarrassment. She wasn’t used to rejection. She stormed away and slammed the door, a move she’d made many times over the years when they’d fought. He’d always chased after her then, but this time he flopped on the couch and let her go.
A soft chuckle escaped his lips. He was free of her.
Annette sat on the floor by Eva’s feet while Eva tested out a messy, medieval-style braid Annette had found on Pinterest.
“You have gorgeous hair,” Eva said. “I can totally picture you as an ancient queen.”
Annette hummed. “I don’t know if what you’re doing looks good, but it sure feels nice. You have to let me try one on you.”
“No thanks.” Eva preferred to let her hair hang unhampered.
“Why not?”
“Have you forgotten about the disastrous bang affair?” Eva had succumbed to Annette’s assurance that bangs on her would look cute. She hated them and it took five months for them to grow out.
“Eva, that was three years ago.” Annette shook her head.
“Keep still,” Eva admonished.
Annette froze everything but her lips. “Besides braiding doesn’t involve a set of scissors.”
“Done,” Eva said, hoping that would end the discussion. Annette scurried to the dresser mirror.
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“Where’s the handheld one?”
“Near the corner of the dresser. Under one of Gabi’s textbooks.”
Annette lifted the book in question and retrieved the mirror. She turned so she could view the back of her head and examine Eva’s handy work. “I like it.”
Eva wasn’t paying attention. She checked the messages on her phone, and stared at the name above the text.
“What is it?” Annette asked.
“A text.” Eva looked up. “From Sebastian.”
“Sebastian Weiss?”
“Yeah.”
“Oh my goodness. Does he want to write with you again?”
Eva hadn’t heard from him for three days. She was sure that he had found her to be childish and immature and probably boring, and that he had moved on to a more mature, sophisticated writing partner.
“Eva?”
“No. I don’t know. That’s not what he’s asking.”
“What’s he asking?”
She handed Annette the phone.
Annette arched a brow. “He left three messages?”
Eva nodded, feeling stunned.
Sebastian Weiss
Can I take you out for lunch tomorrow?
Sebastian Weiss
I thought it might help if we got to know each other better. For writing.
Sebastian Weiss
Not a date or anything. Just friends. In case you’re worried.
Annette squealed. “Sebastian Weiss wants to take you out!”
“It’s not a date.”
“So. You’d still be out. With him.”
“I can’t do it.” Eva rubbed her forehead trying to erase the headache coming on. “My parents would never agree.”
“Don’t tell them.”
“Annette!”
“Eva, you’re an adult.” Annette sat on the bed beside Eva, a serious expression crossing her freckled face. “If you want to go out with a guy, you should go. Hey, I’ll cover for you. Tell your parents you’re coming to visit me.”
“I never visit you.”
“I know. And it’s time you changed that.” She shrieked. “Oh gosh. He just messaged you again.” She handed the phone back.
Sebastian Weiss
Eva?
“Not the patient sort, is he?” Annette giggled. “I guess when you’re a rock star, you don’t have to wait for what you want.”
Eva fought a growing panic. She’d never been on a date before. Even if this wasn’t a date. “What should I say?”
“Say yes, silly.”
Showing up at Sebastian’s place was nerve-racking enough, but at least she was free to leave when she wanted. They had two guitars between them and a song to discuss. Without the song and the guitars, what would they talk about? Her throat felt like it was closing up. “I can’t,” she muttered.
Annette snatched the phone from Eva’s hand, and her thumbs raced across the keyboard.
“Annette!”
“There.” Annette returned her phone. “You can’t back out now.”
Eva stared at the text her friend had written.
Eva Baumann
Okay.
The phone buzzed again and she nearly jumped out of her skin.
Sebastian Weiss
Great. I’ll pick you up tomorrow at noon.
“Oh no,” Eva stood and almost fell over. “He’s coming here.”
“Text him back. Tell him to meet you at Luther Square.”
Eva’s sweaty thumbs moved quickly across the keyboard. Moments later.
Sebastian Weiss
See you there.
Eva collapsed back onto the bed and covered her face with her hands. She couldn’t believe it. She was going on a non-date with Sebastian Weiss. She couldn’t resist a tiny squeal.
Eva waited at Luther Square the next day at noon. She’d told her parents she was going to Annette’s and they believed her because Annette actually came over that morning and walked her out. “Just in case you’re tempted to ditch him,” she’d said.
Annette helped her select a summer dress, yellow with lace trim around a boat-cut neckline and a narrow belt that tied into a loopy bow at the back. “It’s feminine and not as frumpy as your other ones. The belt shows off your narrow waist.”
Eva drew the line when it came to putting pins in her hair, but she had showered and shampooed. Annette spritzed her with some of Gabriele’s perfume when she wasn’t looking.
“Stop it,” she said. “I don’t want to look like I’m trying too hard.”
“You don’t want to look like you’re not trying at all, either.” Annette draped an arm over Eva’s shoulders and kissed her on the cheek. “No worries. You look wonderful.”
Just then a Hollow Fellows’ song came on the satellite radio pumping through Eva’s laptop and Sebastian’s voice filled her bedroom.
Eva dropped her cane and sat on the chair by her guitar. “Oh my heart. What am I doing, Annette?”
Annette giggled. “You’re going on a date with a rock star!”
“A non-date.”
Her friend smirked. “It may be a non-date, but he’s still a rock star.”
Annette walked Eva to the square where Eva playfully shooed her away. “I don’t want him to think I came with my babysitter.”
So now here she was on a warm summer day, waiting for the one and only Sebastian Weiss. She looked around and wondered what he would be driving. She pressed her sunglasses against her face and leaned on her cane. She was about to head for the bench facing the rolling ball fountain when she heard a car horn beep.
Sebastian waved her over to an open taxi door.
“Hey,” he said. Even though Sebastian wore sunglasses, Eva could tell he was checking her out, his eyes scanning her from head to toe. She was glad she’d taken the extra trouble with her appearance and promised herself she’d thank Annette later. Sebastian looked pretty good, too. He leaned against the open door, waiting for her, all suave and cool. He was every bit the celebrity. She saw a group of girls point and knew he’d been recognized.
He placed a hand on her elbow to guide her in, and his touch sent shivers throughout her body. Eva was Cinderella being helped into the pumpkin carriage by the handsome prince. Somehow her life had turned into a fairytale. She pulled in her legs and her cane and smiled, hoping she looked graceful and collected, and not like the unraveling wreck she actually felt she was.
Sebastian got in the other side. He slipped off his sunglasses and grinned. “You look nice.”
“Thanks.” She hoped he couldn’t see her face flush. “Where are we going?”
“Königstein Fortress.”
It was her turn to remove her sunglasses. “I thought we were going for lunch.”
“We are.”
“But that’s at least a half an hour away.” The taxi fare would be outrageous.
Sebastian shrugged a shoulder. “I don’t have any other plans. Do you?”
She shook her head. “I’m surprised you didn’t pick me up in a fancy car. I imagined you with a garage full.”
“Nah. Some guys might do that, but I’m not really into cars.”
“Guitars are more your thing.”
“Yeah, that’s right.” He cocked his head and grinned. “You can’t have too many guitars.”
“So, why are we going to the fortress? There were plenty of places to eat close by.”
“I wanted to take you somewhere different. Have you been there?”
“No.” Eva’s class once did a field trip to the fortress, but she had missed it because she was still in heavy physiotherapy. Her family stuck to home for the most part. They didn’t even own a car. You didn’t really need one once you mastered the transit system, and the railway lines across Germany were vast and efficient.
Sebastian rubbed his chin. “You’re in for a treat then.”
Music pumped in from the stereo in the dash, and Eva and Sebastian engaged in music talk: bands they liked, who’s on top, who’s on the bottom,
their favorite songs and why they were great.
“Best song of all time?” Eva asked.
“‘The Boxer’, hands down.”
“By Simon and Garfunkel?” She was surprised. She thought he’d pick a rock song. “Why?”
“First of all, the song is an example of a perfect match between music and lyric. The music arrangement captures the emotion of the stark pictures the lyric creates. It makes you feel like you are on the streets with the narrator, cold and alone.”
Eva nodded in agreement.
“Secondly, the lyrics are very vivid and poetic. ‘ Seeking out the poorer quarters where the ragged people go, looking for the places only they would know.’ Words like ragged and quarters are not words normally used by street people, so it gives the feeling that the narrator is not from that world but he is consigned to it. It adds to the feeling of loneliness.”
Eva loved how passionate Sebastian was when he spoke. His brows furrowed and he motioned with his hands for emphasis. She worked to keep from smiling inappropriately.
Sebastian continued, “The ‘ly la ly’ tag makes it more of a folk song, which means it's a song for the common man. The last verse is unexpected because it breaks away from the narrator's voice. It’s a vivid allegory of the narrator's predicament. It again paints a very clear picture and says things the narrator would not say himself but the listener hears it and gets a deeper picture. It’s a perfectly written story song.”
Sebastian eyed Eva with a smug expression like he knew he’d impressed her.
And he had.
“What about you?” he asked in return.
Eva had to think. She had a lot of favorites, but had never placed a single one on the top of the pile.
Sebastian patted her knee, startling her with his touch. He smirked at her reaction. “It doesn’t have to be one of mine.”
“I’m a Bob Dylan fan.”
