The Game-Kirsten Backhard

by Shawnte Borris

  “Then, why do you feel the need to keep torturing him?”

  “How the fuck am I torturing him?” I was pissed off.

  “You came in here, all giggly, wearing those tight-ass pants, and then you let that friend of yours play grabbies with you.”

  “Now, you wait a fucking moment, brother. First of all, I came here to spend time with you! Second, I have every right to wear whatever the fuck I want without having to apologize to anyone. And third, my grabby friend is acting more like a brother to me than you right now!” I yelled at him.

  “Kirsten… I’m sorry. I was out of line.”

  “Damn straight, you were. Now, are you going to stay in here and take a piss? Or are you leaving?” I stepped around him to go into one of the stalls.

  “Will you come back and finish the game with us?”

  “I’m not sure,” I said, closing the stall door behind me. “I’ll see how my pee goes.” I heard the bathroom door open. “Finally,” I said out loud to the empty space.

  “Babe?”

  I just want to pee in fucking peace. Is that too much to ask for? I heard Derek laughing as the door shut. This twin communication thing really sucks sometimes.

  “Drew, what are you doing in here? I’m trying to pee.”

  “Go ahead.”

  I know for a fact that he is leaning up against the counter with a smirk on his face and his arms crossed on his chest.

  “It’s like the least kinkiest thing we’ve ever done together.”

  “Are you really going to stand there and listen to me pee?”

  “Yes. At least, this way, we can finally be in the same room together, and you can’t run.”

  “Can you at least give me two minutes, and then come back in?”

  “Will you come home with me?”

  Uh…

  “Kirsten?”

  “I’m thinking.”

  “Go pee, and I’ll meet you outside. Then, we’re going back to my place to talk.”

  Uh…

  “I’ll let your brother know, and then I’ll pay your tab with Mic.”

  “Don’t pay my tab, Drew Parker. I can pay my own,” I said proudly.

  “Princess, we all know that Mic doesn’t let you keep a tab.” He let out a laugh.

  “I’m not a princess.”

  “Okay, sweetheart.”

  After he finally left, I banged my head on the stall door. “Fuck my life.”

  “Ready to go?” Drew asked.

  “Let’s go,” I said, defeated.

  I looked over toward my brother and Mic. When I waved good-bye at them, they both had shit-eating grins.

  “Fuckers,” I muttered under my breath.

  “What was that?” Drew looked at me.

  “Nothing. I’m ready to go.”

  Reaching over, he grabbed my hand and led us to his truck.

  “Are you okay to drive?” I was hoping he wasn’t, so I could cab it back to Derek’s.

  He opened the passenger door for me. Leaning on it, he smiled. “I quit drinking.”

  I lifted my eyebrow at him.

  “Yeah.” He lifted me into the truck. “Come on, we have lots to talk about.”

  “Can we stop for—”

  “Cheeseburgers?”

  “How did—”

  “As much as you think that I don’t know you, I do.”

  As we pulled out of the parking lot, he grabbed my hand. “I love you, Kirsten.”

  It took all that I had not to start crying. I wanted to tell him that I was wrong, stubborn, stupid, and sorry. Not to mention, I was so in love with him, and I had never stopped. It was either that, or I was going to jump out of the damn SUV on the next red light.

  After eating our cheeseburgers and drinking our milkshakes in Drew’s living room, he asked what kind of movie I wanted to watch. I didn’t care. I was just really enjoying the fact that we were in the same room, breathing the same air, and sitting close to one another.

  “Why are you looking at me like that?” I asked.

  “You look happy.”

  “I feel happy.” I smiled.

  Drew moved to kneel in front of me. He placed my hands in his, and we just looked at each other.

  “Kirsten, it feels so good that you are here.”

  When he kissed my knuckles, tears started forming in my eyes.

  “Baby, please don’t cry.”

  As he wiped away my tears away, I lost it. Drew slid me off the couch and onto the floor. He pulled me onto his lap.

  I buried my head in his chest and let go. “I’m so stubborn.”

  He rubbed my back. “I know, but you do it to protect your heart. You don’t let a lot of people in.”

  “I’d be lying if I told you, losing you is something…” I blew my nose on a Kleenex that Drew handed me. “I could handle…but I can’t…”

  Drew took my head and lifted it, so we were eye-to-eye. “You can’t do what, sweetheart?”

  Do I choose to be with him for all the things he’s done right? Can I forgive him for the one thing he did wrong?

  “I’m tired. I’m tired of running.”

  I barely had time to blink before Drew’s mouth was on mine. I ate his mouth like I hadn’t eaten in months. I couldn’t get enough of him.

  Drew broke the kiss first. “I still remember how I felt when we first kissed. That will be with me until the day I die. But that, sweetheart, was the best kiss of my life.”

  I don’t know what will happen tomorrow or the day after that, but right now, at this very moment, I’m tired of keeping my shield up. A woman can only take so much before she breaks.

  I got up on my knees and lifted off his shirt, sliding my hands all the way up his body. I loved the feeling of his warm skin under me. I kissed him on his neck and down his shoulders.

  “I bought a house!”

  I stopped instantly. “What?” Where did that come from? And why is he telling me this now?

  “I bought the house next to Liz and Brad.”

  “What?”

  “Okay, so I haven’t bought it yet, but I should have the keys in my hands by the end of September.”

  “What?”

  “Kirsten, focus.”

  “I’m trying.” I slid off of Drew’s lap.

  Drew let out a breath. “The house next door to Liz and Brad’s is for sale. I put an offer on it, and they accepted it. I’m just waiting for the conditions to be removed. If everything goes smoothly—”

  “Why would you do that?” I asked, starting to get up from the floor.

  He grabbed my hand and sat us on the couch. “I broke us. I broke us because I was a stupid ass. I made a decision that will haunt me for the rest of my life. I know what you want, Kirsten. You want that house. You want to live next door to Liz. And you want to tear down that fence separating the two of you, so both of your children can play in a huge backyard together.”

  I sat there, stunned, trying to wrap my head around what he was telling me.

  “But I…I…look what I did. How can you just forgive me that easily?” I yelled.

  “It’s simple. The truth is I would have done the exact same thing…probably more and definitely worse.”

  I looked at him, and I could feel the tears coming again.

  “I choose you. I want you to be no one other than yourself. I love what I know of you, and I trust who you will become. I will always hold you in tears and in laughter. Kirsten, I want us, just us. No more running.”

  I didn’t move a muscle. “I’m broken.” I whispered.

  “I know.”

  “If this doesn’t work out, it will destroy me.”

  “I know.”

  “What about my job? I’m in Chicago.”

  “Kirsten, if two hearts are loyal to each other, the distance doesn’t matter.”

  “What does that mean?” I knew I sounded wimpy, but I wanted to know.

  “I haven’t slept with anyone. The last time we made love was the last time I had sex
.”

  The guilt overtook me. I needed to leave. Putting my head down, I whispered, “I need to forgive myself first.” I stood up. “I need to go.”

  “Please stay.”

  I closed my eyes and shook my head no. Instead of letting me go, Drew lifted me in his arms and walked us to his bed. He held me while I cried until I fell asleep.

  This year, my sister decided to host another great family Thanksgiving dinner. Insert gag finger here. I had no plans of attending since I was going to be home in eight days for Liz’s wedding. I was in the great city of Vancouver. I was staying in one of the finest hotels overlooking Queen Elizabeth Park.

  My plan was to stay here, relax and enjoy my view…that was until my mother called.

  “Kirsten, your sister is hosting Thanksgiving.”

  “Oh, that’s great, Mom. Be sure to say hello to everyone for me,” I said casually.

  “When you bring the apple pie, you can tell everyone yourself.”

  “Mom, I think you misunderstood me. I’m in Vancouver. Bringing apple pie is not an option.”

  “You’re not coming?” my mom asked, shocked.

  “Nope. We already talked about this, Mother.”

  “What will the family say?”

  “They’ll say that I’m a brilliant person for being smart enough to skip out,” I replied with a smile in my voice.

  “But you’re going to miss out on the stuffed turkey and my bacon-wrapped green beans,” my mother whined.

  It was truly beyond me why my mother thought everyone needed to have turkey and green beans for Thanksgiving. I was okay with pizza and a cold beer while I watched the football game.

  “Mom, they have a great restaurant downstairs. I’m sure I will find something to accommodate my taste buds,” I replied reassuringly.

  “You haven’t been home in a while. When I say that, I mean, you haven’t visited your father and me for a long time.”

  I hated when my mother tried to guilt trip me into coming to family gathering. This time I decided to try her tactic back.

  “When is Derek coming home?”

  “Um, well…”

  “Well, what, Mother?” I challenged. He better not be backing out.

  “Derek started dating a new girl, and they decided to spend the holiday with her family.”

  “Is that so? Derek is not coming home? How convenient,” I said, a little more annoyed.

  “Kirsten, you know that if he could, he would,” Mom said in her stern voice.

  “All right, Mom, I’ll come home, but let’s make something clear right now. If I ever find out my brother is faking the girlfriend excuse, I will kick his ass, and I will not hear one word from you,” I seethed.

  “See you at Thanksgiving, sweetheart. I love you.”

  With that, my mom hung up before I had a chance to get myself out of it. She won again, damn it.

  I’m going to kill that twat brother of mine. How the hell does he get out of Thanksgiving? I know for a fact that there is no girlfriend. STDs, sure, but no girlfriend.

  I decided to text the twat to see what he had to say for himself.

  Me: I’m going to fucking kill you!

  Derek: I take it you talked to Mom? LOL.

  Me: Girlfriend? Really?

  Derek: Yep.

  Me: I call bullshit.

  Derek: Call it what you will. Jealous much?

  Me: What do you have planned?

  Derek: Heading to Phoenix to play golf.

  Me: Fucker.

  Derek: Enjoy the stuffed turkey…that normal people call jerky. LOL.

  Me: Payback is a bitch! Remember that!

  Derek: Love you! <3 See you at the wedding.

  Derek: I’ll make sure the cleaning lady puts fresh sheets on the bed.

  Great, so it looks like I’m on my own for Thanksgiving. Well, the one positive thing that my family had every holiday season was an open bar with a flowing box of wine. Dad would always go all out.

  When my phone started ringing, I answered with a smile at seeing who was calling.

  “Hey, baby,” Drew said.

  “Hi.”

  “Have you decided on what you are doing for Thanksgiving?”

  “Apparently, I am coming home,” I muttered.

  “Really?” Drew sounded shocked.

  “Looks that way.”

  “Why don’t you stay at the house? Everything is all moved in and ready to go. I’ll leave your set of keys at Liz’s. The security code is 0628.”

  “That’s the date of our first kiss,” I whispered.

  “I know.”

  I didn’t know what to think or feel at that moment. I couldn’t understand how Drew was so willing to forgive and forget. Just like that, he’d bought the house that I’d wanted, and he had moved everything in quickly, just in case I was coming home for Thanksgiving.

  “Kirsten, are you there?” asked Drew.

  “I’m here,” I murmured.

  “Are you okay, sweetheart?”

  “Drew…I don’t think I want to stay at your house.”

  I knew Drew was leaning back on his office chair with his feet up on the desk because that was what he always did during a serious conversation.

  “I thought we already talked about this.”

  I didn’t say anything because I didn’t know what to say.

  “I bought the house for us. When you’re home, that’s where you stay.”

  “I think I’d prefer to stay at Derek’s. He’s not going to be home. He’s going golfing.”

  “Kirsten, you’re getting off topic.”

  I knew this. I just didn’t want to tell him I was scared.

  “It’s a really big house,” I said.

  “It is,” he confirmed.

  “You’re not going to be there, and Liz is going to be staying with Brad at his parents’ house. The house will seem really empty.”

  “We’ll fill it soon enough.”

  “Drew…”

  “Yeah, sweetheart?”

  “I want to stay at my brother’s,” I pleaded.

  I could hear him take a deep breath.

  “Okay, but just to let you know, I’m only allowing this because I’m not going to be there. I promised my dad that we’d go fishing.”

  “Thank you.”

  “It’s our home.”

  “So you keep saying.”

  Both Drew and I sat on the phone in silence, waiting for the other person to be the first to say something.

  “Any word of selling your condo yet?” he finally asked, breaking the silence.

  “Yes, I finally have a good offer that I am going to accept. I’m signing the final paperwork when I come home for Liz’s wedding.”

  “Do you know who’s buying it?”

  “No, they want to stay anonymous.”

  Great. More silence.

  “Are you going to stay at our house when you’re home for the wedding?”

  Crap. “No, Liz and I decided that I’ll stay with her at her house. All the other girls will be staying there, too.”

  “You’re running.”

  Now, it was my turn to take in a deep breath. “Not running.”

  “You sure?”

  “Yes.”

  “I’ll see you in a week.”

  “Can I use your hot tub?” I asked shyly.

  Drew laughed. “Our hot tub.” Then, he hung up the phone.

  Not sure how I’m gonna get out of this one…or if I even want to. The idea of me living in that house is pretty damn appealing.

  Pulling up to my sister’s house, I was trying to figure out a way to get out of here and back to my luscious hotel suite as quickly as possible. Now would have been a good time to own a fish. I’m sorry, but I gotta go. My fish are lonely. As much as I liked that thought, I missed my dad, and I was looking forward to watching the football game with him. I parked my car along the curb for a quick getaway. My dad noticed and came to welcome me.

  “Hey, Daddy. I missed you.
”

  “Baby girl, I’m so happy you came,” he expressed with a big smile on his face. “I’ve missed you.”

  “You mean, you missed my smart-ass mouth.” I laughed.

  “Did you bring a bag? I can take it in for you,” Dad said.

  “No, Daddy. I’m only here for a night, and I’m staying at Derek’s since he’s golfing.”

  “You heard, huh?” My dad laughed. “How are you doing, kid?” He grabbed me by my shoulders and started walking us toward my sister’s house.

  “I’m good, Dad.” I smiled and looked up at him. “Really, I am.”

  “That’s all I need to hear. Want a drink?”

  God, I love my father.

  After a round of hellos, my sister asked me, “When was the last time you ate a cheeseburger?”

  Then, my grandmother gave me the good old twenty questions of my love life. “Why can’t you grab and hold on to a man at your age?”

  Finally, I made it into the living room and sat with my dad and brother-in-law, Evan, to catch the pregame show.

  “So, your brother bailed on you,” my dad whispered.

  “Yeah, the twat. Just wait until I get my hands on him,” I seethed.

  My dad laughed. “Oh, I’m sure you will come up with something good.”

  “I always do. Did Mom tell you that he is seeing my sexatary?”

  “No.”

  “Yeah. Apparently, he likes getting blow jobs in my office.”

  “H-how…wha-what…shit… never mind. I’m not sure I want to know,” my dad stuttered.

  “I had to swap out my chair!” I exclaimed.

  Dad and I both looked at each other and shivered.

  “Looks like I gotta have a talk with that boy,” my dad said.

  Dad got up and came back into the living room with another beer for Evan and me.

  “Where’s that nephew of mine?” I asked Evan. “I’ve been here for two hours, and he still hasn’t shown his face.”

  “Playing video games in his room. He has a tough time with big crowds,” Evan answered, still watching the preshow.