by Amber Miller
It couldn’t be attraction because Gustaf wasn’t her idea of a suitable husband. Gustaf was a farmer. He was her overseer. His involvement in her life was for the sole purpose of helping her establish her farm, so she could turn a good profit and settle the note to her land. And of course to help her find a husband. Once that happened, he could go back to his farm or leave to find land of his own, and she’d never have to see him again.
It was what they both wanted, she told herself, ignoring the painful squeeze around her heart. It was the only solution possible. Not that Gustaf wasn’t a good man. When he didn’t allow his anger to reign, he had a peace that she hadn’t known in a long time.
No matter how many times she allowed her arrogance to control her words, he almost always took the blame. But not without also delivering chastisement in the form of advice.
“Getting angry at me and others who help you, Raelene, will make you more unhappy. If you continue in your haughty ways, you will have no one left.”
“At least he admits I’m not the only one at fault.” Raelene pushed the needle through the quilt square and pulled tight from the other side. Gustaf had wisdom and character, making him far from the buffoon that Sanbourne had accused him of being. The things the man had said to Gustaf were so degrading.
Raelene’s eyes widened. That’s what it was. It was empathy, not attraction.
She’d been appalled by Sanbourne’s pretentiousness and condescension, and hurt for Gustaf. Despite the occasional stilted English and his unrefined social skills, Gustaf managed quite well with the life he lived.
People simply weren’t as formal here in the colonies. Raelene remembered when Mama and Papa first introduced her to their neighbors in town. Although New Castle was similar to home with its cobbled streets, shops, and town square, the populace was different. Raelene thought initially that the community was lacking in something.
Pretentiousness.
Oh, there were some who insisted upon making everyone aware of their lofty position in town, but for the most part, everyone here understood that life wasn’t easy in the colonies. Things they might have taken for granted back home weren’t available. Everyone looked out for everyone else. There was no room for arrogance if one wanted real friends like Gustaf had in abundance. Like she was sorely bereft of.
“Gustaf was so right then,” Raelene groaned aloud. “My manners were deplorable where he and his family were concerned.” But she’d made an attempt to improve.
And she had. Maybe that was why he’d looked at her so keenly in that magical moment in the barn. He’d seen the change in her and was moved by it. She no longer believed that he only helped her for her land. Raelene understood that his sense of honor kept him working for her.
He truly had nothing to gain by staying—and so much to gain had he not. He could be following his dream, maybe have found his own farm by now. Yet he stayed, determined to make her farm flourish and to help her keep it by finding her a suitable husband. But with less than two months until her birthday, was that a possibility? Raelene clutched the quilt blocks to her chest, closing her eyes as though she might see the future.
If only she knew.
❧
The horses neighed in greeting as Gustaf entered the barn a few hours later. Free of his leather jerkin, the ends of his shirt hung loose over his breeches, and he hadn’t bothered to fasten the snaps of his stockings. That dip in the creek had done a world of good in cooling him off. But it didn’t remove the memory of Raelene’s face inches from his own or the flash of emotion he’d seen just before her eyelids drifted shut.
She’d wanted his kiss as much as he’d wanted to give it. That was why he had to stay away. If he allowed his feelings to take control, any chance she had of making a good match would be ruined. Worse, he’d break his promise to her father, something he could never do.
Jerking free two fistfuls of fresh hay, he strode toward the four horses and offered them each a treat. Gustaf scratched their forelocks as they chewed.
“Why can’t I stay away and do my work?”
That never got him into any trouble, and he could do that without worrying about whether his actions would jeopardize their agreement.
“It is good you two cause me no problems.” Gustaf patted the jowls of Jägar and Valdig. He released a disdainful chuckle. “Now I talk to horses. I must be mad.” After making his way up to the hayloft, he stared out the opening at the clear sky as night descended. The twinkling lights seemed to be talking to each other. If only they’d offer him advice on his predicament. But only One could do that.
“God above,” he said to the sky. “You have a purpose for me here. I stay because I believe this. But I made a big mistake. I don’t want that mistake to hurt Raelene. She needs You, not me. Please show her that.”
“Trust Me.”
The words seemed to fill the barn. At first, he wondered if one of the animals had been given a voice like the donkey in the Bible. But then he recognized God’s voice.
“You have remained faithful and will be rewarded.”
The promise spoke to his heart and gave him a relief he hadn’t felt in weeks. He should have spoken with God more often. Maybe that incident in the barn wouldn’t have happened if he had. It was over now, and he could get back to what he did best. Farming.
At least in that, he had confidence.
❧
Rising early the next morning, Gustaf concealed his blanket and the old shirt he used as a pillow. He didn’t need Raelene venturing into the hayloft and finding his bed. Although he was certain Preston wouldn’t pose a threat any longer, he didn’t feel right leaving Raelene alone on the farm.
With the bedclothes away, he set about his morning chores. Selecting a couple of apples, Gustaf used the fruit and a few pieces of dried jerky to break the fast. He couldn’t bring himself to approach the cottage, regardless of the tantalizing smells that wafted toward him. His stomach groaned in response, but he ignored it and dove into his work with a vengeance.
By midmorning, he’d given up trying to turn his thoughts away from Raelene. She’d opened the back door to the cottage to dispose of the remnants of whatever meal she’d cooked. From a distance, Gustaf watched as she worked in her garden and disappeared inside again a couple of hours later. No matter what he did, her face wasn’t far from his mind.
Striking the anvil with the mallet, he pounded with such force that he didn’t hear anything else until he noticed a horse and rider come to a stop beside the cottage. Gustaf paused and shifted his gaze between the unfamiliar man, who dismounted with the ease of a skilled rider, and the cottage, its back door firmly shut.
Obviously, Raelene either hadn’t heard the horse or was ignoring it and leaving it to him to greet the visitor. The least he could do was introduce himself and offer the man a drink.
Gustaf pulled his hair back and retied the string. He might be simply a farmer, but he was representing Raelene’s farm and should look presentable. Wiping his hands on his breeches, he approached the man with hand extended.
“I am Gustaf Hanssen. I work as the overseer. You have come to see Miss Strattford?”
Although an inch or two shy of Gustaf’s height, the man carried himself well and possessed an air of confidence. Yet something in his demeanor bespoke a humility that others who had come to visit lacked. That was one point in his favor. He seemed to be about Gustaf’s age.
“From what I hear in town, you are the one I need to see first.” The man accepted Gustaf’s handshake. “Cedric Milton.” He cast an eye around the farm and looked out over the fields. “You have done a fine job of working this farm. When I learned of Miss Strattford’s most unfortunate loss, I had wondered how she would manage. This is quite impressive.”
Gustaf liked this man. Genteel, but genuine, he treated Gustaf as an equal. So why was he here?
“I must say I did not expect to find myself in this position, but I cannot speak falsely and say it does not have its benefits. It seems to be a gift from God that I returned home when I did.”
What was this man saying? Had Gustaf missed something that would explain the odd words Cedric spoke? Gustaf’s face must have shown his confusion, because Cedric immediately became contrite.
He swept his cocked hat from his head and slapped it against his chest. “Oh, do forgive me. We have only just met, so how could you possibly know anything of my past acquaintance with Miss Strattford?”
Past acquaintance? “You and Miss Strattford. You met her before?”
“Yes, but our families only had a brief time together before I had to depart. Her family had recently arrived in New Castle and her father had purchased the candle shop.” Cedric’s horse whinnied softly, interrupting their conversation. “I do not wish to impose, but would you have some fresh water for my horse?”
Gustaf mentally chastised himself. Where were his manners? He’d become so distracted by the respect Cedric gave him, offering to water the horse had slipped his mind. “Yes. We have a large barn with extra room for your horse. He will have fresh hay and water to drink.”
Cedric followed his lead. So the man had already met Raelene, albeit a few years ago. And he’d been away for some time. How much did he know about the stipulations surrounding Raelene’s inheritance? His fine horse and clothing suggested he wasn’t here for her money, but what other reason did her previous suitors have?
After leading his horse into the barn, Cedric turned to face Gustaf. “I suppose I should start at the beginning.”
Gustaf nodded.
Cedric held the reins of his steed loosely, allowing it to drink its fill from the trough. “As I said, I met Miss Strattford and her family when they first arrived. I was working as an apprentice for the owner of the dry goods shop while also assisting my father with our farm. I had only six months left before my apprenticeship was complete.” He ran his hand along the dark, shiny neck of his animal. “Once I finished, I planned to purchase land and start my own farm. Then Mother became quite ill. It didn’t take long before we realized she wouldn’t be long on this earth.”
“I am sorry.”
Cedric slanted an appreciative glance his way. “Thank you. It wasn’t an easy time, but I am quite thankful the good Lord spared her pain and took her quickly.”
The good Lord. Pleasure filled Gustaf at Cedric giving credit to God for his mother’s release from pain. One more point in his favor.
“After her passing, Father and I sailed home to England to settle affairs there. Unfortunately, some complications and family disputes forced us to remain there for more than a year. Father wasn’t able to make the journey back here, so I returned alone.” Melancholy overtook his expression. “Now I must decide whether to sell or develop the family farm. Our indentured servants and overseer tended to the farm while we were away, but I now have full charge and must make a decision.” He took a deep, bracing breath. “Which brings me here.”
Now it was starting to make sense to Gustaf. “You want to speak with Miss Strattford. If she agrees, you will sell your farm and work this one instead?”
“That is a possibility.” His reply came out in a whoosh of relief.
“This can be done with my pleasure. I will make the introductions.”
Gustaf straightened as a shadow crossed the doorway to the barn.
“Make introductions to whom?”
Clothed in simple cotton with her hair braided beneath her lappet cap, Raelene was a breath of fresh air in the barn. Her familiar lavender scent drifted along the breeze from outside, reminding Gustaf of how close he’d come to kissing her the day before, of how much he wanted Raelene for himself. Could he go through with this? A minute ago, he had believed Cedric was an answer to prayer. With Raelene standing a few feet away, he wasn’t so sure.
Thankfully, the choice wasn’t up to him.
Raelene held out his handkerchief. “I came to return this to you.”
When he took the freshly washed and folded fabric from her, his gaze locked with hers. Did she remember, or was what he’d hoped was mutual attraction simply gratitude? When Cedric quietly cleared his throat, Gustaf realized how long he’d stood there like a tongue-tied fool.
“Miss Strattford, this is Cedric Milton. He has come to meet you again.”
Raelene’s smooth brow rose in surprise, but a small measure of recognition also appeared on her face. “Again?” she asked, eyeing the man with open curiosity.
“Yes, Miss Strattford, again.” Cedric wiped his hands with a clean handkerchief and tucked it away before extending a hand to her.
“We met when your family first arrived in New Castle. I was just telling Mr. Hanssen why I’ve been away for so long. But I am home now and would like very much to call upon you. If you agree, I shall share with you that story, as well, and perhaps hear of your three years since first arriving in this fine colony.” Cedric backed away so that he addressed both Raelene and Gustaf before continuing. “I apologize for not coming to the cottage first, but I believed speaking with Mr. Hanssen beforehand was the proper thing to do.”
He was polished and mannerly. Gustaf had to give him that. And he’d obviously impressed Raelene. From the way her face lit up, Cedric was just the type of gentleman that Raelene had spoken of when she’d told Gustaf of her childhood dreams. Now that such a man was standing here in the flesh, Gustaf should be happy for her, but he was not.
“Yes,” she said. “You may call again at your convenience. I would be delighted to learn more.”
Of course she would be delighted. Being everything that Gustaf wasn’t made Cedric all the more attractive.
“Would my arrival upon the morrow be too soon?”
Yes! Gustaf wanted to exclaim. But he held his tongue.
“Tomorrow would be fine. I shall expect you around midday.” Her face flushed pink as a rose, Raelene curtsied, gave their visitor a dazzling smile, and retreated with a step that seemed lighter than Gustaf could recall. If this brief meeting was any indication, he and Raelene would be seeing a lot more of Mr. Milton.
As Cedric mounted to leave, it was all Gustaf could do to sound as if he, too, looked forward to their visitor’s return. If Cedric won Raelene’s heart, Gustaf would at least be free to pursue his own dreams. So why did it feel as though he were looking forward to a prison sentence rather than freedom?
Fifteen
Raelene accepted Cedric’s assistance as she stepped down from his buggy. He held on to her hand a little longer than necessary, but she didn’t mind. This had been their fourth outing together in a little over a week. With him at her side, she’d managed to attend Sunday services again. She’d finally found someone who didn’t bore or offend her with his self-serving demeanor.
“Thank you for a most enjoyable outdoor excursion, Mr. Milton. Walking along the banks of the Christina used to be a favorite pastime of mine. Lately, there hasn’t been time.”
Cedric raised her hand to his lips and brushed a feathery light kiss across her knuckles. “The pleasure was all mine, I assure you.” He straightened and met her gaze. “Your pleasant company only added to the delight of this fine day.” Reaching into the buggy, he retrieved the basket he’d stowed. “And the meal you provided was fit for a king.”
Raelene raised a gloved hand to her mouth, unable to hold back a girlish giggle at his flattery.
“Would you care for tea? You do have a rather long journey back to your farm.”
He tucked the basket into the crook of his arm. “Thank you. I do believe I will accept your invitation.”
“You can set the basket on the bench,” Raelene instructed before stepping inside the cottage. “Tea will be ready in a few moments.”
After she placed the teaket
tle over the fire, Raelene sat on the footstool and stoked the banked embers. Cedric entered and approached the bookshelf along the opposite wall, his hands clasped behind his back. He wasn’t what she’d consider handsome, but he did have attractive qualities. She leaned back to observe his profile. Strong, but with a less rigid pose that paralleled his gentle nature. Not like the hard set of Gustaf’s angular jaw.
Raelene stiffened. Where had that thought come from? Just when she thought she could separate her business affairs from her personal life, the line between them blurred with Gustaf sitting astride it. Oh, that infuriating man!
The water in the teakettle rattled the lid and forced Raelene’s attention back to the task at hand. Anything to keep her mind off Gustaf. She poured tea for Cedric and herself, then preceded him outside to the bench and searched for words to hide her discomfort.
“I wanted to tell you how much I appreciate your invitations and company. They have been a welcome respite from the daily chores and routine.”
His lips curved up. “I do hope your acceptance of my visits has been out of more than mere gratitude.”
Raelene reached for her fan and snapped it open, partially obscuring her face. “For truth, sir, what other reason could there be?”
“Why, my dashing nature, of course,” he supplied with a twinkle in his eyes.
Oh, he was so much like her cousins with his charming wit. Spending time with him reminded her of the fun they used to have and of the carefree way she felt with Kaariana. Cedric had mentioned spending the past year in England. How was it that some maiden there hadn’t captured his attention? If only she felt more than friendship for him.
Cedric set down his cup and clasped her free hand in his, an intent look replacing the jovial one. “I do hope you realize my intentions are honorable.”
Raelene grew so stiff that she could only nod.
He cast a quick glance around, as though looking for Gustaf’s giant shadow, which was always about, then returned his earnest gaze to her. “And as the sun has halfway completed its descent, I must hasten in posing this next question.”
