He stiffened, his whole body tightening. His eyes turned cold again. A sickening feeling slid through her, and she knew that she’d just hurt him. “I wasn’t very good at history, Princess. You’ll have to forgive me. I’m just a dumb grunt following the orders of my CO. If you have a problem with it, you should take it up with Dane.”
Alea winced and looked away. What had she done? An apology sat right on the tip of her tongue. Why? This wasn’t her fault….but it wasn’t his either. He was just doing his job. But damn it, she was being followed twenty-four seven. The only place she was allowed to be alone was her bedroom, and even then, the minute she opened the door, one of them waited outside. She felt like a prisoner in so many ways, and it was wearing her out.
As he stared a hole right through her, Alea felt her resolve weakening. She yearned for those blue eyes to glow with the warmth they had just minutes ago.
The door to the balcony opened, and a lean figure slid through. This man didn’t have a problem with his tuxedo. She was fairly certain that Oliver Thurston-Hughes had been born in a tux. The very noble Brit wouldn’t have done anything so common as to have been born naked.
“Alea? Darling, are you out here?” He nearly bumped into Landon. “Bloody hell, who are you?”
“I’m over here, Oliver,” she said before Landon could reply.
A broad smile came over the handsome Brit’s face, and he stepped around the guard, utterly ignoring him, then walked toward her. “I’ve been looking all over for you. That receiving line was complete hell. I’ve never seen so many people.”
Oliver had been at the last British royal wedding, so Alea doubted that, but he was always polite. Oliver would never say a social function wasn’t the greatest event he’d ever attended. “I was happy when it was over. My face hurts from smiling. Where’s Yasmin?”
He shrugged an elegant shoulder. “Last I saw, she was dancing with the Prime Minister. She’s been looking for you, though. Alea, it’s so good to see you.” He smiled warmly. “You’ve been a virtual stranger ever since…”
His words trailed off, and she could see the way he paled when he realized what he’d nearly said.
“Since she was taken hostage and forced to endure something most people wouldn’t survive?” A sarcastic voice with a low Texas accent cut through the awkward silence. Now Landon decided to get chatty? “I’m sure she’s sorry she didn’t just pause her recovery to call you up the second she got home.”
“No one asked you,” Oliver shot back. “Why is he here? You’re not seeing him, I hope?”
She saw far too much of Lan. And far too little. “He’s my bodyguard. I’m sorry I haven’t called.”
“You don’t owe him an apology,” Landon ground out.
“Stay out of this.” She couldn’t handle him getting involved in her personal life. She could barely handle him being her constant watchman. She turned back to Oliver. “I am sorry. It’s been hard to get back into the real world.”
Oliver was everything that Landon wasn’t. He was perfectly charming as he stared at her with a pitying little frown. “Of course it is, darling. I apologize. It’s terribly selfish of me. It’s simply that Yasmin and I have missed you.”
“I’ve missed you, too.”
They hadn’t missed her enough to put off their wedding while she’d been kidnapped. She guessed she couldn’t really blame them. She’d been gone for months. They’d assumed she’d been killed, her body buried somewhere in an unmarked grave. Yasmin hadn’t had any idea that she’d been found until months after the fact. Yas still didn’t know about all the rehab she’d had to go through. The last thing Alea wanted the world to know about was her drug addiction.
She wondered if Landon knew, if one of the reasons he, Dane, and Coop were so zealous in their guardianship was that they had been tasked to ensure she didn’t hit the streets looking for a fix.
“I think you should come home with us in a few weeks. We’re going to spend the winter at the country estate. I know my brothers would love to see you again.”
Oliver’s brothers were outrageous flirts. She didn’t need that. But it did point out a problem. Lately, she been thinking that she couldn’t stay in Bezakistan, aimless and lonely, for the rest of her life. She hadn’t really left the palace. Instead, she’d been hiding here, taking classes online. Sure, she could get a degree that way, but what would happen when she graduated?
The door opened again. Yasmin glided through the door. She looked gorgeous in her designer gown, her pale hair in a perfect upswept do. “Oliver? Oh, you’re out here with Alea. I thought you had gone back to your room, dear.”
Yasmin utterly ignored Landon, moving around him like he was just a piece of furniture. Her perfectly manicured hands reached for Alea’s.
“Hello, Yas.”
Yasmin had been her childhood playmate. Their fathers had both been connected to the Bezakistani royal line maternally. Alea’s parents had drowned when she was very young, so her aunt and uncle, the sheikh and shaykhah, had taken her in, given her the al Mussad name, and raised her at the palace. But Alea had always looked forward to the weeks when Yasmin would visit. It had been the only time she’d had another female playmate.
Yasmin hugged her briefly. “Alea, it’s so nice to see you. I tried calling for ages, but no one would put me through. I rather thought you were ducking my calls, dear.”
Alea groaned inwardly. Yasmin seemed to know how to make her feel guilty, even when she didn’t mean to. “Sorry. I really haven’t felt up to socializing.”
“Talib has allowed you to hide away for far too long. You’re never going to feel better if you don’t get back to normal.” Yasmin frowned, her perfect face forming a mask of disapproval.
“Yas, let it be. We talked about this.” Oliver reached for his wife’s hand.
“I know, but seeing her has made me more certain than ever that she can’t recover by languishing here. She hasn’t truly smiled once. And what is Tal thinking putting those guards on her?”
“They’re here for my protection.” Despite her own problems with the guys, she felt an urge to defend them.
“You don’t need a constant shadow reminding you of danger, Lea. Come to England with us. You can enroll at university and take up your schooling again. Or you can work with me at the foundation.”
Ah, yes. Reaching Across Cultures. One of the surprises she’d been faced with when she’d been rescued was the fact that Yasmin had taken over the European offices of this al Mussad charity, a job that had been earmarked for Alea.
But it wasn’t like she could do the job now, endure all those glittering fundraisers and public speaking engagements. How would that work when she could barely manage to leave the palace?
“I just mentioned that myself,” Oliver said with a long sigh. “I thought we were going to do this with a little subtlety. I’m sorry about the hard sell, love. I’m afraid Yasmin has done nothing but plot and plan to take you back with us.”
Yasmin pouted prettily. “I miss my cousin. I was beside myself when we thought you were gone forever. It was like losing my sister.” She sniffled a little, a tear sliding down her face. “Lea, I miss you. Please think about coming back with us. I want you to be there when—”
“You weren’t going to tell her that, either,” Oliver muttered under his breath.
“I can’t keep it from her. She’s my closest relative. Oh, Lea. You weren’t there when we got married. You have to be there when I have my first baby. Please say you’ll come.”
Yasmin was pregnant? Silly, superficial Yasmin was married and now having a child. A little kernel of jealousy weighed in her gut. Yas had been the prankster when they were young. She’d nearly dropped out of school. She hadn’t even thought of going to university. So how was Yas the one with a husband and a career that should have been Alea’s, and a baby on the way?
She struggled to find something to say. She looked down at Yasmin, who was perfectly slender in her Marchesa gown. “You don�
�t look pregnant.”
Yasmin’s smile lit up the night. She ran a hand down her flat stomach. “I assure you I am. I’m almost three months along. You have to come. It will be just like our childhoods when we spent summers together. And you can start over in England. The palace is too insular. You need to be out in the world.”
Yasmin waxed on and on about all the things they could do in London. They would shop, go to the theater, hang out with Oliver’s brothers. One was a very famous football player, and Yas was convinced that Alea should go on a date with him.
The idea curdled her stomach. Alea backed up, her hip bumping the ledge of the balcony. Out of the corner of her eye she saw Landon surge toward her. She quickly edged away from the ledge lest Lan decide she meant to escape Yas by jumping to her death or something equally dramatic. He would think of it as his sacred duty to either save her or go down with her, no doubt.
“You’re going to love Callum. He’s so handsome, and he’s just a bit younger than my Oliver.”
“Yas, stop. I don’t know that I want to leave the palace right now.”
When her cousin pursed her lips, preparing an argument, Alea knew she had to come up with some excuse or Yasmin really would set her up with an athlete. The paparazzi already swarmed her on those few occasions she ventured out in public. They called her the “Prisoner Princess.” Tal had managed to keep the gritty details of her kidnapping out of the press. The world believed she’d simply been held in a gilded cage until the royal family had coughed up enough cash. If they knew the truth, they would call her the “Prostitute Princess.” The very idea made her stomach turn.
Oliver put a hand on his wife’s shoulder. “Back off a bit, Yas. You’ve just thrown a lot of information her way. Give her some time to think.”
“You’re not happy for me, are you?” Yasmin stared at her, her doe eyes more than a little sad.
“O-of course I am,” Alea stuttered. “I’m just surprised.”
And a bit annoyed, which made her feel guilty. Yas merely meant to help. But she just wanted peace. Why had she and Oliver sought her on this balcony? Alea had enjoyed the quiet of her and Lan sharing the space alone.
“But I thought you would be happy for me, too. I’m sorry, Lea. Oliver was right. You’re still in a dark place, and I didn’t realize… This is all my fault.”
She turned and fled the balcony, her dress floating around her ankles. Alea winced. Oliver cursed under his breath. Yas had always been on the dramatic side. Pregnancy hormones probably weren’t helping. Of course she wanted her cousin to be happy…but it was hard to feel joy about anything when she felt stuck in a rut defined by numbness, terror, and a slow-burning rage.
Oliver dragged a hand over his face. “Forgive her. She’s missed you far more than she’s let on. I swear she changed the day you went missing. She was quite manic for a while. I was worried we would have to sedate her those first few days. I think the wedding was the only thing that held her together. And now the baby is coming.”
He said the last in a sort of resolved tone that led Alea to wonder if Oliver wasn’t the one who was unhappy about the baby. “Are you two in trouble?”
Truthfully, Alea was surprised the couple had made it this far. She’d had a bet with Kade that Oliver would bow out of the wedding. Yasmin, a drama diva, didn’t seem like the right fit for the level-headed, stiff-upper-lip Brit.
“It isn’t the first time she’s been pregnant,” Oliver admitted, his voice going low. “I’ll be honest, Lea. I actually had plans to call off the wedding, but then you went missing, and Yasmin was expecting. I felt I had to honor the commitment. In some ways, I felt I had to honor it in order to honor you.”
“Me?”
“Alea, you know I’ve always had a thing for you, but you went off to New York…and I kind of fell in with Yas. We do all right, the two of us. We muddle through. She had a miscarriage shortly after our honeymoon. She’s been obsessive about getting pregnant again ever since. Please take a little time and think about our offer. It really would do you good to get away from all this pomp and circumstance. I’ve heard a rumor that Yasmin isn’t the only one who’s pregnant. If it’s true, the spotlights will only shine brighter on the palace.”
Piper. She wasn’t showing yet, either, but she wouldn’t be able to keep her condition from the press for long. There didn’t seem to be a minute of the day that one of Piper’s husbands didn’t have a hand on her belly as though they could already feel the child growing there.
Alea wouldn’t have children. She would grow old right here and be the pathetic old maid. No one could possibly want a woman as broken as she was. No one knew just how shattered she was on the inside. What man could handle that, even if she could bring herself to get close to him?
“Yes. They’re going to make the announcement in a few weeks, when Piper is past the first trimester.”
“It will be a madhouse, then. You must know that. The rags in England don’t really give a damn about me unless I’m hanging out with Wills. It’s Callum they’re interested in, and I promise, you don’t have to date him. Though I’ll warn you, he’ll make you crazy about it, and when you relent, I’ll likely be a bit jealous. Come on, Lea. I can protect you in England.”
“I’ll think about it.”
But there was no way she belonged there. If she went, Yas and Oliver would mean well, but with a baby coming, as well as ties to both celebrities and royals, Alea knew she’d find no peace. She was starting to think, however, that they were right about getting out of Bezakistan. Maybe a change of scenery would be good. Maybe she needed to be alone for a while, get her head together, weigh what she wanted in life against how brave she felt in pursuing it.
A long, painful moment passed. “I suppose I should go and check on Yasmin.”
“Probably so.”
With a nod, Oliver turned and walked out. Finally, Alea could breathe again.
“Did you love him?”
She turned, startled. Lan stood, his stern face expressionless. He could be so quiet, she’d almost forgotten he was there. And he rarely asked questions. In fact, Landon could follow her for hours and never say a word.
“No. God, no. I was so young. I didn’t love anyone except Robert Pattinson,” she answered without thinking.
Oliver had been a pleasant companion, and they had gone on a few dates, but she hadn’t even kissed him. She’d been happy when she’d discovered that he and Yasmin were dating. She’d hoped Oliver would be a calming influence on her headstrong cousin.
“I’m glad. Because he’s an asshole.” One minute Landon was a shadow clinging to the wall, and the next he was in her space, a mountain of lean muscle.
“He is not! What makes you say that?”
Lan gave her an incredulous stare, as if wondering how she could miss the big picture. “He put the moves on you.”
“He did no such thing. He’s never once tried.”
“Persuading you to come home with him and saying he’d be jealous if you dated the soccer player…yeah, his approach is mostly subtle, but he’s still hitting on you. Even if he would never do anything about it, he’s married, and that makes him a douche nozzle.”
“He’s just trying to help…in his way. His relationship with Yasmin is a little complicated.”
They’d gotten married far too young, and she wasn’t sure Yas was really ready to be a mom. “She’s his wife. He should never talk to another woman that way. If I was married, I wouldn’t.” He stared down at her, his expression soft and searching. She’d never seen him look so gentle. “Don’t let them sway you from getting what you need to heal. They’re trying to use you to buffer their drama. You don’t need that, darlin’.”
He hovered so close that she felt the heat radiating off his body. All it would take to press her lips to his was one simple lift to her toes. Then she’d be brushing her mouth against his and know what it felt like to kiss a man again. She hadn’t kissed anyone in years it seemed. No soft brushing of her m
outh against another’s. No arms that wound protectively around her. Just pain and terror. Memories flashed through her head of vicious fingers tangling in her hair, forcing her head back until her neck felt like it would break.
“You just went white. Are you all right?” Landon reached out for her, but she wouldn’t be able to endure his touch, not when she felt so dirty.
They could put her in a designer gown, but she was still the girl who knew what it meant to be subjugated. She was still the dumb animal who had watched as the women around her were tortured, raped, and snuffed out.
“Don’t touch me.”
He jerked back. “I won’t. I wouldn’t hurt you for the world. Take a deep breath. You’re here in Bezakistan. You’re at the palace. No one will ever hurt you here. Me, Dane, and Coop will make damn sure of it. Take a long breath. I’ll do it with you.”
He breathed in, his chest filling with air. He was so calm and kind that she found herself following his directions. When he reached for her this time, she let him take her hand. He held it until she stopped shaking.
God, she wanted him to hold her. She wanted what Piper had. She wanted to be surrounded by men who loved her, who accepted her…who could want her even after all that had happened.
Her captors had ensured she would never have any of that.
She gently pulled her hand from his, hating that moment they were no longer connected palm to palm. “Thank you. I’m fine now.”
“Talk to me, Alea. Tell me what just went through your head.”
She couldn’t. It didn’t matter how much she wanted to. She was never going to talk about it, especially to the three men she very nearly idolized. She was never going to tell anyone about her shame. “That’s ‘princess’ or ‘Your Highness,’ please. It isn’t seemly for you to call me by my first name.”
Alea needed distance before she crumbled. In that panicked second, she didn’t know how else to get it.
But when she saw his face in the next moment, she cared very much. Her heart ached as Landon drew back, his shoulders squaring and his eyes icing over. “I apologize, Your Highness. Like I said, I’m just a dumb grunt. Sometimes I forget my place. Perhaps we should go back to the party.”
THEIR_VIRGIN_PRINCESS Page 2
