“I love him. I’ve never been so sure of anything in my life. And I understand your concerns, I really do, because I had the same ones. Everything happened pretty quickly. But this is what I want, Grandpa. Dean is what I want.”
“So there’s no chance you’ll open up your business back in Carlisle and come back home?” he asks, looking sad.
“Oh, Grandpa. My life is here now, with Dean. I can’t leave. Once everything with Rick is dealt with, I promise to come and visit you, all the time.”
“I’m just going to miss you,” he says, looking down at the table.
“Couldn’t you move here?” I ask shyly.
He snaps his head up, looking at me wide-eyed. “You’d want that?”
“Of course I would. You’re my grandpa, my family,” I tell him, my voice kind of high-pitched.
“I’ll think about it,” he says and opens his mouth, ready to ask something else, but stops himself, looking so sad it breaks my heart.
“Grandpa, whatever it is, just come out and say it.”
“I really do wish you’d stop doing that,” he scolds, shaking his head.
“It’s not my fault. You’ve got that look, the one that says you don’t know how to say what you need to. You’ve only ever had it with me, Mom and Grandma.” I giggle.
“Figures,” he says, rolling his eyes. “There’s no easy way of saying this, so I’m just going to say it. I need to head home. I know I said I’d be staying for a week, and I hate to leave you when you need me the most, but with everything going on, I need to get back. I also have to meet up with the private investigators I hired to track down Rick. I can’t get in touch with them,” he says quickly, and my heart sinks.
“But you just got here.”
“I know, doll, but I really do need to get back. Anything could happen, and I pretty much left everyone in the lurch. If I’m honest, I don’t trust Rick, and I want to do some of my own searches,” he admits.
“I understand,” I tell him, and he sags with relief. I realise then how hard this must be for him, especially with everything that happened to me Saturday night. “When do you leave?” I ask, hoping I can still spend another day with him.
“As soon as we get back,” he answers regretfully.
“Oh!”
“I promise I’ll be back as soon as I can, doll. I won’t be gone for very long.”
My eyes water and I nod, wishing all this mess would go away. “Okay. Do we have time to order or shall we get going?”
“We’ve got time for food,” he tells me, reaching out for my hand.
We go quiet, looking over our menus, and I can’t help but feel his loss already. I hate he has to leave so soon.
But now that I know he’s willing to think about moving here, maybe I can convince him into saying yes.
With that in mind, I cheer up, enjoying the last few hours with him before he has to leave.
*** *** ***
We make our way back to Lily and Mark’s, and as usual, they’re both waiting for us as we get out the car. I know straight away he’s already informed them of his plans and my heart aches. I really don’t want him to go, but I understand why he has to.
“You know?” I whisper to Lily, leaving Grandpa to get his case.
“Yeah, he told us last night after you left. How are you feeling?”
“I’m going to miss him, but I understand why he has to leave. I just wish he didn’t have to go.”
“I know, doll. It won’t be forever, and then he can visit whenever he wants to.” She smiles.
“I’m going to talk him into moving here. He’s been talking about retiring for a while, and he’s said he’ll think about it,” I tell her, smiling wider.
Her eyes widen. “Oh my, I never thought I’d see the day. Well, fingers crossed.”
I can’t tell if she really believes he will or not; her expression is blank. “Yeah,” I say absently.
Dean chooses that moment to pull up, looking ragged. I step away from Lily, walking over to him.
“Hey, what’s wrong?” he asks, getting out of the car.
“Grandpa’s leaving,” I tell him, my eyes watering.
“When?” he asks, scrunching his eyes up.
“Now,” I answer sadly.
“Oh, Lola, he’ll be back. Did he say why he was leaving so soon? I presumed he was staying for the week.”
“He needs to sort out some stuff, and he doesn’t trust Rick. I understand why he’s going, but I’m going to miss him. I pushed him away for so long, always making excuses as to why I couldn’t go around for dinner. I could never let him see the bruises. And now that I don’t have to hide and can finally spend time with him, he has to leave. Because of me…. because of Rick,” I say, feeling my eyes begin to water.
“Let him do what he’s gotta do. I think he blames himself for what happened to you and feels it’s his responsibility to make sure Rick doesn’t get away with it. He loves you. He hates that you were hurt and he didn’t even know. It’s his way of making everything better,” he explains gently.
“I just don’t want him to get hurt. Who knows what Rick will do.” I bite my bottom lip; just thinking about it is making me nervous.
“I’m going to be fine,” Grandpa says, sneaking up behind me.
I jump, turning around to face him and as a lone tear slips free. “Please be safe,” I plead.
“My darling girl, you have nothing to worry about. Now come give me some love,” he demands, holding his arms out to me.
I don’t need asking twice; I’m in his arms in seconds, holding him tight, more tears spilling free.
“Promise me you’ll come back.”
“I promise,” he whispers, emotion clogged in his throat.
“Good,” I choke out, and when he tries to pull back, I hold him tighter, struggling to let him go.
“C’mon, Lola, I won’t be gone forever, just a week or two,” he tells me, and I feel Dean walk up behind me, pulling me against his chest. I let him, looking helplessly at my grandpa.
“Okay. Call me when you get there.”
“I will,” he says, kissing my forehead. I close my eyes, savouring his touch. “Look after my girl,” he warns Dean, looking over my head.
I’d giggle if I weren’t so torn up about him leaving. Mark and Lily walk over, saying their goodbyes.
“Keep me updated,” Mark says, and Grandpa nods sharply.
“Look after her,” he says, like I’m not standing right here. But I can’t deny the way my heart warms at how concerned he is about me.
“Goodbye, doll,” he says, giving me one last kiss.
“Goodbye, Grandpa,” I murmur, my throat tight.
He throws his case into the passenger seat before walking around to the driver’s side. He gives me one last look, a small smile on his face, before getting in the car.
Dean’s arms tighten around me when my legs threaten to give way. My grandpa drives away and, for some reason, it feels like it’s the last time I’m going to see him.
I turn around, hiding my face against Dean’s chest, struggling to not let any tears fall. Dean holds me close, resting his chin on the top of my head.
“Mom, I’m going to get Lola back,” he says, his chest rumbling beneath me.
“Okay, dear. We’re here if you need us,” Lily says softly, and I hear her and Mark walk away.
“C’mon, let’s get you back,” he says.
I nod, following him over to the car. “How was your day?” I ask as he gets in, starting the engine.
“Okay.”
My brows scrunch together, looking over at him. His hands are clenched around the steering wheel, his posture stiff.
I presumed his absence today was because he wanted to give Grandpa and me some time alone together but seeing his reaction to my question, I’m starting to think it’s something else entirely.
“Is everything okay? You seem to be stressing over something,” I say, turning in my seat as we pull up outside the cab
in.
He sighs, shutting off the engine and turning towards me. “I just…,” he starts but then pauses, shaking his head. “It’s nothing, just work-related shit.”
“Don’t lie to me,” I order softly, shaking my head. I’m actually disappointed in him. I didn’t think he’d evade the question, brushing it off like it’s nothing.
He curses, looking at me with a guilty expression. “Fuck, you’re right, and I’m sorry. I just…. Please don’t be mad at me.”
“Why would I get mad at you?” I ask slowly, cursing when rain starts to fall.
“I’ve been looking into Rick, long before your grandpa said he was going to do it. I’ve also had someone keeping tabs on him, but we lost track of him the same day as your grandpa and haven’t been able to pick him up since. It’s like he’s vanished from thin air.”
I bite my lip, looking at him, wondering how I can word what I need to say. Instead of overanalysing it, I just say it.
“I’m not mad. If anything, I already had my suspicions. I knew you weren’t going to move on like nothing happened. It’s not who you are, so I’m not mad. I think it’s kind of you, but Dean, you can’t put all this pressure on yourself. I hate that I’m putting you through so much stress,” I admit, reaching for his hand.
Placing his own hand on mine, he gives me a gentle squeeze.
“No! Don’t ever think that. You’re not putting any stress on me, love, I promise. I’m just pissed. I’m pissed and angry that no matter what I seem to do, I can’t keep you safe,” he says, running a frustrated hand through his hair.
Now I understand his distant behaviour. He’s still blaming himself for what happened to me Saturday.
“You can’t keep doing this to yourself,” I whisper, moving to straddle him. I struggle at first, and Dean has to push the seat back, making more room.
“What are you doing?” he asks, huskily.
“Proving I’m not broken… well, not anymore. You see, I have this amazing man in my life who has been putting all my broken pieces together and no matter what life throws at me, I know I can get through it. And why you may ask? Because of you. I love you, Dean, and you can’t control everything that happens. But you should know that you save me in the important ways, never forget that,” I tell him, leaning down and capturing his lips in a kiss.
“I… I don’t know what to say,” he croaks, his eyes filled with emotion.
“Say that you love me,” I whisper, grinding myself down on him.
He grins, his eyes darkening. “I love you, with all my heart.” He grips my hips tightly.
“Tell me you want to make love to me,” I demand against his lips before kissing the corner of his mouth.
“Oh, I’m going to make love to you.” He nods, opening his door. I squeal when he pulls us out into the rain, laughing when he starts running towards the door.
He stops when he reaches it, rain pelting down on us, soaking us.
“Tell me you love me,” he demands, repeating my earlier words.
“I love you.” I grin, and he takes me inside, showing me just how much he loves me.
Chapter 25
A storm is coming and it’s going to tear all our lives apart.
Chapter 26
“I can’t believe how well this has turned out. I was positive they wouldn’t be able to knock that wall out,” I tell Brooke, sliding down to the floor in my new store.
“I know. I’m so excited.” She grins, taking a seat on the floor next to me.
We watch the builders take measurements in the back room.
After getting the keys a few weeks back, Brooke and I have gone crazy with the decor for the shop. And since I chose the same wild colour theme Brooke has next door, picking furniture has been so much freaking fun. The craziest we’ve gone is what the builders are measuring for right now, and that is joining our stores together.
At the back of our shops, there is a storage room, so we’ve asked the builders to knock the wall down and join the two rooms. We didn’t even think it would be possible, but we were lucky.
The store opening is in another eight weeks, but Brooke’s Books may not be reopened for a further three due to some equipment and safety checks.
“What time is Pagan coming?”
“Any minute,” I answer, biting my lip.
“How do you think she’s going to react?”
“I’m not sure.” I shrug, playing it off, but inside, I’m worried.
Pagan wouldn’t take my money for organising our store opening, so today I’m going to surprise her with something much better than payment. Something huge… and it’s definitely going to change her life.
I’ve bought the store across the street, and I’m going to let her use it to start her own business, the one she’s planned all along.
I know she’s not going to just take it from me, so I’m hoping a little persuading and a sweet deal will change her mind.
I’m seriously nervous about it, worried it will push her into doing something she’s not ready for.
“Hey, we’re done for the day. We’ll get a start on it once we have the correct materials,” the young builder says, checking Brooke out.
“Thank you so much,” I tell them all, getting up. Pagan chooses that moment to walk in.
“Hey,” she greets in a sing-song voice. Her eyes shoot up, lingering on the builders as they make their way out. Once they’re gone, she looks at me with wide eyes. “Why didn’t you tell me you had hot builders working for you?”
“Um….”
“Um?” she repeats before drawing back, flabbergasted. “You’re supposed to hook a single girl up,” she pouts, and I laugh at her expression.
“Stop drooling over my workmen,” I tease.
“Don’t flaunt them in my face then,” she tells me, her voice high-pitched. “So, what did you need to show me?”
Brooke stands, grinning from ear to ear. “Something… big.” She grins, emphasising the last word.
Pagan’s eyes light up like a Christmas tree as she starts rubbing her hands together.
“Please tell me it’s one of those men and that they’re coming back to strip.”
I snort unlady-like. “No, you pervert. C’mon, I’ll show you.”
“Okay… weird,” she mutters, her eyes scanning the room.
“Not in here.” I laugh, pulling her towards the entrance and out of the store. I lock up, and we head over to the shop across the road.
As I open up the door, I pick up more junk mail and newspapers, throwing them on the pile I stacked up the last time I was here.
“Please don’t tell me you’ve bought another store,” she groans, but it’s meaningless since she’s smiling. “I really think you should slow down.” She tries to come off serious, but she starts giggling.
“Shut up.” I laugh.
“You’ll be the mayor next, owning every piece of land in this town,” she continues, and we all begin to giggle.
“I’ll forget that comment, you hussy,” I scold playfully. “Yes, I’ve bought this place, but it’s not for me.”
“Then who the hell is it bloody for?” she asks, confused.
“Well, there’s a woman I know who wants to start her own business, but she doesn’t have the funds to do it. I’m going to make her a deal she can’t refuse so she can start it,” I explain.
“Aw, Lola, that’s an incredibly kind thing for you to do,” she gushes, all playfulness gone.
My lips form into a smirk. She has no idea I’m talking about her. This is better than I imagined it would be.
“Thank you,” I say, struggling not to laugh.
“What do you think of the space?” Brooke asks, being sly.
“Oh, I think it’s great. I swear I’d love a place like this one day. Whoever this is for is seriously lucky. I’d kill for this,” she says, nodding as she eyes the store.
“Well, that’s a good job. I was worried for a second there that things were about to get awkward.” I sig
h, sagging my shoulders for effect.
“Huh?” Pagan murmurs, looking between us confused. It’s so adorable I have to chuckle. “Why do I feel like I’ve just lost ten minutes of my life and in that time missed a conversation?”
I giggle, stepping forward. “It’s yours.”
She stands there, her mouth falling open into an O shape. It makes me giggle harder.
“Say something,” Brooke demands, no longer able to hold in her excitement.
Pagan shakes her head, looking utterly gobsmacked, her eyes watering. “You’re joking, right?”
Her words have me sobering and walking up to her, placing my hands on her shoulders. “Everyone deserves to live their dream. I want to do this for you. You’ve done so much for me, and this is my way of repaying you.”
Her chin wobbles, causing my own eyes to water. “I can’t afford to start a business or to rent this place, though,” she tells me, still looking stunned and a little out of it.
“Ah, well, this is where the ‘deal you can’t refuse’ comes in. But first!” I grin and rush over to my bag, grabbing the envelope of cheques. Her eyes widen when I hand them to her, and her hands shake as she flicks through them, reading each one and who they’re from. Her parents, Dean, Grandpa, Sid, Brooke and I have all given her something towards starting up. Although Brooke’s and Sid’s weren’t much, it all added up to a nice amount.
“I can’t believe you’ve done all of this for me. It’s too much,” she chokes out, tears falling from her eyes.
“It’s not. Not for what we all get in return. We get to see you live your dream.”
“But I can’t pay you back, Lola,” she whispers, looking at me.
“Those are gifts,” I say, gesturing to the cheques in her hand.
“I can’t do this. I won’t be able to afford a place like this, and there are so many expenses―”
“Stop! This is the deal. After you’re all started and open, you can have three months to get settled. After that, you can give me affordable monthly payments to buy this place. And before you start saying you can’t afford it, you will. I won’t be charging full price.”
If I Could I'd Wish It All Away (I Wish Book 1) Page 27
