“Don’t you think it’d be so much easier for both of us if we continue what we have and you actually accepted it?” He didn’t let me answer. “Imagine us with you better.”
Before, it would have been just as hard to visualize it, but I could see glimpses now. My trust that he could hold the power and make everything better had never been more concrete. He could do it. All I had to do was give in. Accept that this was who I was, and I did now. I didn’t like to say I was a monster, but in a way, I was. Suddenly, I could live with that, being Michael’s other half. After all, if I wasn’t, there would have been no way I could handle what he had to release. And I knew he had to inflict pain. It wasn’t a lifestyle choice. It was just him. How he’d been molded. Born, even. Like me.
Lost in thought, I started crossing the street. My whole body jumped at the loud engine that revved as I walked directly in its path. My eyes narrowed and turned into a glare as they connected with Liam’s. The utter hate that radiated from him sent a chill down my spine. I knew he was just being a dick and wasn’t going to hurt me, but him pretending like he was had my heart beating faster.
My steps increased until I was past the width of his truck. Instinctively, my hands came to just above my waist, a tick I tended to do when I was nervous or upset.
“Nice ass,” he yelled from his window, revving the engine once more. “You lonely yet? You can hop on in. I’ll take you for a ride. A good, long, hard ride.” My hand rose in the air and I flipped him off, not bothering to look back. He was just trying to rile me. I wouldn’t give him the satisfaction. As I stepped up the curb, a yell had me spinning around. My eyes widened as I watched Michael pull the top part of his body toward the truck window.
“You ever fucking talk or come close to her again...” He reared back and I gasped as he drove his fist into Liam’s face. Once. Twice. Three times. The truck jumped forward a little and Michael let go. The moment he did, it accelerated and rushed through the green light.
My mouth stood open as he jogged over. The rose was sticking out above his tight shirt. He pulled it out and shook his head. “That dumb motherfucker. Shit, let me see him around again. I was far from finished.” He tightened his jaw, his eyes moving back to where Liam’s truck had disappeared. “Nice ass. That’s my ass. Not his.”
“That’s right,” I said, reaching for his hand, trying to calm him. “I’m yours.”
Michael pulled me into his arms, hugging to me tightly. “Revving his engine… I swear, if his foot would have slipped or he would have even bumped you, I would have fucking killed him.” Tighter he squeezed, until air was hard to come by.
“I’m fine. Really.” My words were soft from lack of oxygen. Only then did he seem to realize what he was doing. Michael let go and stepped back, lifting the rose.
“I love you, too. Thank you.” He reached out, letting it caress down the side of my face. I smiled and got caught up in his eyes, feeling safer than ever. “Go ahead. I’ll be here.” He gestured for me to start walking.
As I turned around and glanced back at him, I knew he’d be there for me no matter what. Whether it was him letting me unravel my own mind, or protecting me from Liam, or even my own doubts, Michael wasn’t going anywhere.
The shops blurred by as I headed toward the diner on the corner. I was mentally and physically exhausted. Hungry from the hours of walking I’d already done and ready to go home. Not to some lifeless apartment, but my real home. Mine and Michael’s. We could still continue this under the same roof. I was stable now, but that didn’t mean he had to stop teaching me how to accept who I had become.
A jingle sounded as I pushed opened the door and walked to a far booth in the corner of the room. Within a minute, Michael was walking in. He went to head in the opposite direction when I shook my head, waving him over.
“You’re getting better,” he said, sliding in. “You’re not as spaced out or sad today.”
The waitress walked up and we ordered our drinks. Michael immediately began looking through the menu while I stared at him.
“I want to go home.”
His eyes jerked up. “As in, our home?”
I nodded. “I think I’m ready. I still want you to continue what you’re doing, but I know who I am now. Even if I am still a little scared.”
“Don’t be. You know I’ll do anything for you. Just let go of everything completely and obey. I told you that when we first got together. Nothing’s changed.”
“I know.” I breathed out, heavily.
“If you’re coming home, there are rules. You’re going to listen this time. You’re going to go back into routine and I want you on a tighter schedule. When you’re not working, you’re doing as I say. There’s no half-assing this, Anne. I’m going to expect a lot from you, and no matter how you feel about it, you’re going to push through and make yourself do it. The pain will come as I give it. Sometimes it’ll be in bigger doses than others. You may want more, but you’re going to accept that what I inflict is what you get. It’s better than none, and it’s not going to be more than you can handle. Do you understand?”
“I do, Sir.”
He smiled, leaning his arms over the table. “Say it again, Anne.”
My eyebrows drew in. “I do…Sir.” My head tilted. At his increasing smile, I shook my head. “Now you’re just teasing me.”
“You’re going to say those words in exactly two years from today.” He looked at his watch. Again, his eyes came to mine. “At eleven-thirty seven AM. That’s when we’re going to say our vows in front of everyone we know.”
Heat flushed up my neck at the thought, but I couldn’t deny that if I had to imagine myself marrying anyone in the future, it’d be him. The waitress set our drinks down and I waited until she left before I turned back to him. “You can’t set a wedding date when we’re not even engaged…more or less, completely stable.”
“I can. You’ll be ready by then, and when the time comes, I’ll make you officially mine.”
“Forever?” I asked.
Michael picked up my hand, opening it up and kissing the palm. “You know it, baby.”
Epilogue
Michael
The dim light. The music blaring in the enclosed room. Cheers and laughter filling the air. It was déjà vu all over again. But, now, it was better than the last time I’d been here. A million times better.
I circled the room with my eyes for only one person. The same one who had stolen my heart over two years ago.
Anne smiled, happier than I’d ever seen her. With a wave of her hands, she expressed something to Sarah, Cassy, and Nancy that she obviously felt passionate about. I knew when she got excited her hands had a life of their own. It was cute and I took a few more steps, wanting to catch every single angle of her beautiful face.
Curls were beginning to escape the high bun on her head and the pearls around her neck and on her ears moved with the sway of her body expressions. Lace swept across her chest and I moved my vision to her bare shoulders and throat. It was such a tease to what I knew rested just below the material of her wedding dress. My mark. The dress, also my mark. I’d made her mine. Completely. There wasn’t any part of ourselves that we didn’t share now. We had each other’s heart. Trust. And now she carried my name.
The side of my mouth lifted as butterflies took over. Even now, she affected me in ways I never knew possible. Had I imagined a few years ago that I’d be married, deeply in love, and perfectly content, I wouldn’t have believed it. After all, I was a monster. Unworthy of any woman’s love. I’d break them completely, I was told. Shatter their inner-self beyond repair.
It was a lie and I hated that I had even given it thought. My biggest insecurity had been used against me, but it took Anne’s breakdown for me to see what I was really capable of. I healed her. Made her so damn strong that sometimes I wanted to pull my hair out. Sure, we disagreed. Even had our occasional argument. But, God damn, did we make up for it afterward. She opened things inside of me that I di
dn’t even know existed, and with her healing, came mine.
The love that she gave me washed away all the pain from my past. All the tough times that life had given me. I hardly recalled the shit I’d gone through. It was almost as if my existence hadn’t really started until the day I’d seen Anne in that church. The same one we said our own vows in. The same one where she’d spoken to me for the first time.
The thank you she’d whispered as I held to her waist, righting her fall, would never escape my memories. She’d been so stunning up close that I couldn’t breathe. The rain had fallen over me, but I didn’t feel it. In that moment, she was all I knew. All I ever wanted to know. Those steps were exactly where I had taken her when I knelt down in front of the cathedral and asked her to marry me. She’d thrown herself into me so hard that I thought we’d both go tumbling down the stairs. And I could have fallen, but I don’t think I would have felt anything more than the joy of her saying yes.
Now, as I stood across the room and let her mingle with her family, I knew we were only going to get happier. Stronger within each other. Just like we did with each passing day. There was no holding us back. Together, we’d weather anything that came our way. We’d had to do it on numerous occasions already and overcoming them was a victory in itself. That was the beauty of commitment. Of love.
Anne laughed and her eyes scanned the room, settling on me. Her features softened, the smile remaining as she put out her hand and said something. They all glanced over and she began walking in my direction. It wasn’t a question as to whether I should stay and wait for her to get to me or if I should meet her in the middle…I was already walking.
The silk swayed around her feet and her hips seductively moved a little more with each step. Damn, she knew just what to do to get to me. Combined with the expression she wore, I felt my control slip just the slightest bit.
“What’s that look I detected, Sir?” Her arms wound around my neck as I pulled her close.
If she only knew. If only I did. There was no words to describe what Anne did to me.
“Awe, maybe?”
She laughed, but it slowly melted away as she held my stare. Heat began to pour from my skin, the lust electric between us. My fingers pushed into the hair at the nape of her neck. It was tight from being pinned and loosened against my touch. As my other one cupped to the side of her face, I traced my thumb over her jawline. Whether people saw us or not, I didn’t care. Nothing existed but me and Anne.
“Are you happy?” I didn’t need the answer to know, but I wanted her to say it out loud. To hear her verbally admit what I felt.
“More than anything.”
My lips pressed against hers, tender at first, but it didn’t last. Anne’s tongue slipped into my mouth, caressing, teasing the tip. I fisted the dress at the small of her back, pulling her closer, wanting to keep us in this moment forever.
Through the fog, I heard yelling. Shouts. It took me of few seconds to break away to see what all the commotion was about. What I was met with was a room full of guests cheering and whistling. My brother stood there with a few of his friends, his arm around Sarah as the crowd began clapping.
Anne buried her face in my chest and I held her closer as she laughed.
“We should make our rounds,” she said, lifting her head, once again cloaking me in our own perfect little world.
“You first.” I gestured ahead and she titled her head, still smiling.
“You want to watch me?” she asked, seductively, taking a few steps back.
“Forever, baby.”
THE END
About the Author
Alaska is an erotic BDSM author who also goes by the pen names Jennifer Salaiz and Jenny May. She lives in the SF Bay area...for now. She's a dreamer, and longs for the day when her husband and kids can load up in the car and drive until their hearts’ content. Adventure and discovering new places play a huge role in Alaska's life. It drives her, and feeds the creativity of coming up with new locations for her stories.
Within the last two years, Alaska and her family have drove across the country twice, and also drove the distance from Texas to California three times. Asked, if she could choose one place to permanently settle down, where it would be, Alaska laughed. "Montana, today. Tomorrow, it may be Alaska, again. I go back and forth."
When Alaska’s not dreaming of spontaneously hitting the road to find a new place to write about, she's being a mother and wife. If you're looking to connect with her to learn more, feel free to email her at [email protected], or find her on Facebook. You can also stop by her website jennymayauthor.com.
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