by Dena Christy
His hand squeezed on top of hers and she turned it over so she could clasp it. She moved over to sit a little closer to him and he let go of her hand and put his arm around her, pulling her closer to him.
“What happened to your husband? If it’s not too painful to tell me.” He ran a soothing hand up and down her arm, and Elle let go of some of the tension that was coiling inside her when he’d brought the conversation back to her own ordeal. Few knew what happened to Ian, and she had shared it with no one since she’d moved to town. Perhaps it was time to finally let go of what was bottled up inside her. She would never truly move on until she made peace with what happened to Ian and part of that was talking about it freely.
“You don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to. We can talk about more pleasant things if that is easier for you.”
“It might be easier but it is not what I need. Part of the reason I left my old town was for a fresh start, at least that’s what I told myself. I think in a way I was running away from what happened.” The truth of what she was saying struck her, and she leaned into him a little more. His arm tightened around her, and she got the feeling that no matter what she said it would be okay. And she needed to talk. She finally met a man who made her feel desire again after four long years. It was time to explore that side of herself, but she wouldn’t be able to do it if she held onto all the crap she’d been carrying around inside her since Ian had died.
“And do you think you are ready to stop running from it?”
“Yes. My husband was murdered. He went out one night, for milk of all things, and I never saw him alive again.” There was a small crack in her voice and he pulled her to him so she was sitting on his lap. She rested her head against his chest as he put his arms around her.
“Jesus. I’m sorry that you had to go through that.”
“Do you want to know something I have told no one else?” A small ball of fear settled in her stomach over what she was about to reveal to him. Would he judge her harshly for what she was about to say?
“Only if you want to tell me. Only if you think it will help you to say something. Just know you can say anything and I won’t judge you.”
Elle swallowed hard for a second and screwed up her courage to say what she was dying to say. There was still a bit of fear inside her, because for all his talk of not judging her, until she said it out loud she would never really know for sure.
“I’ve spent a lot of my time being angry with him. I was so mad at him for leaving me when he promised that we would be together until we were old. I know it’s unfair to feel that way. Especially when it wasn’t really his fault. It was mine. The milk wasn’t that important. Why did I have to ask him to go get it?”
That was the real issue. There was anger inside her toward Ian for dying, but even more toward herself for sending him out that night.
“Did you murder your husband?”
Elle pulled back sharply, and looked at him, shocked. How could he even ask her such a thing?
“Course I didn’t. I told you he went out for milk, and some asshole murdered him for the twenty dollars that was in his wallet.”
“Then why would you blame yourself? It’s not your fault what happened. It’s the fault of the person who took his life. You had no way of knowing what happened when you sent him out the door. Guilt is a heavy burden. Don’t make yourself carry it. You don’t have to.”
Ells lower lip trembled and she could feel tears stinging her eyes. “How do I let it go?”
“By asking yourself if he would want you to feel that way? Would he wanted you to feel responsible for what happened to him?”
The tear slipped down her cheek, and she shook her head. Ian was the most forgiving person she’d ever met, and she knew he would never want her to blame herself for what happened to him. The fault lay with whoever picked him as a target. The one who had been so desperate they thought a human life was worth twenty dollars.
She sank forward into Gregor's chest and he put his arms around her. She poured out four years worth of guilt and sadness onto his chest while he ran soothing circles with his large hands over her back. She didn’t know how much time had passed with him sitting on the couch holding her, but finally the storm inside her was over and she leaned back to look at him.
He ran his thumb on her cheek to wipe away any remaining tears. “Do you feel better now?”
“Honestly, I didn’t think I would, but I do. I never realized just how much I was holding inside that I’ve never dealt with.” She wasn’t under any delusion that she was all better now, but she was making a start toward the healing she needed to do to move on. Another step would be to let this man into her life and letting herself feel what she needed to feel for him. “Thank you.”
“There is no need to say it, but you’re welcome.” He reached up to cup her face, and she knew what was coming. She leaned in to him and their mouths fused together. There was no urgency in this kiss, and she knew it wouldn’t lead directly to her bedroom. She wasn’t ready for that, and deep down she knew he understood that. The kiss they shared was one of two kindred spirits who'd both known pain, but were now making their way toward healing.
Elle sat back and looked at him. He looked back at her and for the first time in four years she felt free. And she knew what she would do with that newfound freedom. She would explore her desire for this man. And maybe, just maybe, open herself up to love again.
9
Gregor tapped his fingers on his leg as Rickman drove home.
“Did she say what the news is about?"
“No. And sitting there fidgeting won’t get us home any faster." There was an exasperated tone in Rickman's voice, and and Gregor was aware it was because he asked that same question three times already. It was Rickman's own fault since he was the one who informed Gregor that Julia had news pertaining to the hunters but had refrained from saying what it was. If he didn't want to be pestered all the way home he should've kept his mouth shut until they got to the house.
Just when things were going so well with Elle, this happened. She was finally opening up to him enough to tell him something so deeply personal, and now he was about to learn something that would put what was building between them in jeopardy.
"Maybe it's good news." Rickman glanced over at him and gave him a tentative smile. Gregor rolled his eyes.
“When is it ever good news?"
Gregor resigned himself to the fact that he would have to say goodbye to Elle. If the situation with the hunters was about to intensify, he could not risk her getting caught in the middle. Damn, why did this have to happen now? Why could it not have been avoided until she was firmly at his side as his mate? At least he would've been in a better position to protect her from the hunters. As it was, if the news Julia was about to tell them was bad, and he had no reason to think it wouldn't be, he would have to say goodbye to Elle again. To do anything else was unthinkable because he would not risk her life.
“Even if it's not good news, I'm sure we can deal with it. There's no reason for you to be so down in the dumps about it."
“You think there's absolutely no reason for me to be upset about this? You realize that if the war with the hunters has intensified I'm going to have to say goodbye to Elle."
A look of comprehension crossed Rickman’s face. "I can see how do you wouldn't want to risk Elle getting hurt. Why don't we find out what Julia has to say before you decide that it will be the worst news ever? I don't know what it is about you dragons that makes you expect the worst."
“A long life filled with disappointment has made me expect more disappointment in return."
Gregor's mind worked as he stared unseeing out the side window of the car. There was no way he could come up with anything positive that Julia would have to say about the hunters. The relationship blossoming between him and Elle was as good as doomed.
They pulled up in front of the house, and the weight of Gregor's disappointments settled on top of him. He fel
t like he was still being punished for one mistake made so many centuries ago. Why couldn't fate smile down upon him just once?
“Well, let's get this over with." Gregor got out of the car and trudged towards the house like a condemned man. With Rickman by his side he walked in the house and made his way to the sitting room where he knew his family waited. As expected, his brothers and their mates were waiting for him when he walked in.
“Finally. We've been waiting forever for you to get here. Now Julia can finally tell us what is going on." Iszak spoke and turned his eyes toward his mate who was sitting beside him. Gregor looked at Julia, trying to gauge what sort of news she would tell but if the news was bad her eyes were not revealing anything.
"Do I need to sit down for this?"
Julia smiled at him and waved to towards the empty chair near where she was sitting. "You can sit if you like. But you can take the look of dread off your face. The news is good, not horrible."
Gregor sat down in the chair she'd indicated, but wanted to wait for what she had to say before he got his hopes up.
“Now that we have the seating arrangements all settled can we get on with this?.” Rickman stood in the doorway and seem to be as anxious as everyone else to hear what Julia had to say.
“Over the next couple of days my grandfather is going to be communicating with the hunters here in town and he will be pulling them back." The excitement in Julie's face as she told them the news, but a small part of him knew there had to be a catch. Dragon hunters were nothing if not fanatical, particularly as they got older. There was no way that Julie's grandfather would pull back for hunters without wanting something in return.
“And what do we have to sacrifice in order for him to make this happen?" Gregor braced his hands on his knees and leaned forward in the chair. He was certain that this was not the good news that her face proclaimed it to be.
“We don't have to sacrifice anything. This really is the good news that it appears to be. The hunters will be gone and we can move on with our lives."
There was no way he would get his hopes up until he knew exactly what all this would entail, and there must be more to this thing then whatJulia was telling them.
“And your grandfather is doing this out of the goodness of his heart? So you just called him and said Granddad there's these pesky hunters in Waldron Valley and I would like you to get rid of them. I can't believe it’s easy." All his old suspicions of Julia came rushing back. What if this was a trap? Why would she contacted her family without mentioning it to any of them first?
"I don't think I like your tone or what you're implying." Iszak put his arm around Julia and pulled her closer as he spoke through gritted teeth. "Why can't you take this as the good news it is meant to be?"
“Because I know that life doesn't work that way. It's fine for you because you know the hunters would never hurt her, but I don't have the same assurances about Elle. And as long as there is even the slimmest of possibilities that she could get hurt I cannot make her my mate. The chances are good you will have to kill me yourself when my curse rises up to take me over."
Silence hung over the room for a few moments, and everyone was reminded of the ticking time bomb living inside him. He didn't begrudge his brothers the fact that they'd woken before him and had already found their mates. He knew if anyone deserved to be cursed it was him. But it was a bitter pill to swallow that now he found the woman he was certain was meant to be his and he had to give her up.
Julia leaned forward and put her hand on his leg. Gregor froze for a second because this was the first time since they'd met that she'd ever willingly gotten close to him.
"I didn't call my grandfather. He called me to tell me that my father is dead. Someone stabbed him in prison and all I can say about that is I am relieved that he's out of our lives. My grandfather is an old man, he has lost his only son to this ridiculous dragon hunting lifestyle. He knows Iszak is a dragon and that I'm carrying his baby. He doesn't want to lose any more of his family, and he realizes that neither you, Andor nor Isaac are a threat to anyone. So for the sake of his great-grandchild he has agreed to contact Nash and the others and tell them that there are no dragons in Waldron Valley and that they're to return home."
Gregor uncrossed his arms and relax a little, but there were a few questions he needed answers to before he would allow himself to hope.
“And will they listen to your grandfather? Will they leave just because he says so?"
"I have every reason to believe they will. My grandfather is respected in the hunting community and Nash and the others know he is not one to cross. It also helps that my father is dead, so there really is no impetus to spur them on any further. This is good news, Gregor. The hunters will be gone in a matter of days and you can be free to court Elle."
Was it really going to be that simple? Was the one road block standing in his way from truly being with Elle finally eliminated?
Gregor could scarcely believe it and he sat back for a second to take it all in. Was he truly free to be with her? The look on his brothers' faces told him it was true. The threat of Nash and his gang had been eliminated. Now there was absolutely no reason for him to hold himself back from her.
He stood suddenly, so suddenly that the chair fell over and hit the carpet behind him. He quickly righted it and made his way to the door.
"Where are you going in such a hurry?" The question came from Andor and Gregor took a few seconds to stop and look back at him.
"I'm going back to her. Now that I know there's nothing standing in my way, I can't keep myself from her any longer. She's my woman and I will be with her."
And with that he hurried out of the room and raced toward the front door. The sound of rapid footfalls hitting the tile floor behind him halted him for a second. He turned to see Rickman running toward him.
“There is no need for you to come. It would take too long to get there by car. I need to be with her now."
“But how do you intend to get there?"
"I’m flying." And with that Gregor hurried out the door and down the driveway. Once he was a short distance away from the house he stopped, closed his eyes and embraced the magic that would transform him into a dragon.
The transformation took only seconds, and once it was done he let out a triumphant roar. With his dragon side free he took to the sky and flew toward Waldron Valley, knowing his mate was waiting for him. The flight to the abandoned field on the outskirts of town took only moments. And just as quickly he changed back into his human form. With determination spurring him on he made his way to Elle’s shop.
Once outside her shop he looked around the deserted streets around him. There was no one there and there was nothing that would keep him from her any longer.
He looked up and could see that the light was still on in her apartment. He reached out and rang the doorbell beside the shop door. He waited for her to answer, and when she didn't come down quickly enough, he rang the bell again. Finally, the lights came on in the shop and the shade over the glass portion of the door rolled up and he could see her face looking out at him.
She quickly unlocked the door and opened it. She took a step back as he quickly rushed inside and closed the door behind him.
"Gregor, what is it? What's wrong?" There was a look of dread on her face, and Gregor took a deep breath to calm his sense of urgency. She had no way of knowing just how things had changed for him since he’d left her only a short time ago. The last thing he wanted to do was frighten her. He reached up and cupped his hands on her cheeks.
“There’s nothing wrong. As a matter of fact everything is right. I want to be with you, I need to be with you. If you don't feel the same, if there's absolutely no chance that you would want to be my woman tell me now and I'll leave."
For several agonizing seconds all she did was look up at him. Had he'd read the signs wrong? Was what he was feeling all one sided? Had he read the situation wrong because of all his feelings from the past being mixed up with
the present?
Her eyes grew big for a second and she swallowed hard. “When my husband died I thought a part of me died with him. The womanly part of me, the one capable of feeling desire. When I found you outside my shop the other night that part of me came roaring back to life. I don't know what the future will hold for us, but I do know I want you. For tonight and for however long this lasts between us, I want to be your woman."
That was good enough for him. He moved his body closer to her as his mouth came crashing down on hers. Kissing her felt like coming home, especially now that he knew there was nothing that would come between them.
Desire flooded Elle’s body as Gregor fused his mouth with hers. Any lingering doubts she may have had about the rightness of being with him melted away in his arms. She’d been telling the truth when she told him she didn't know how long this thing with him would last, but she would let go of her doubts and enjoy being his woman for however long they wanted each other.
She pressed her body closer to his and ran her hands up his shoulders, around his neck and sent her fingers spearing through the soft, short hair at the base of his skull. A growl rumbling in his chest as his arms tightened around her. How had she ever thought she could resist him when being in his arms felt like it was where she was meant to be. With a boldness that fanned the flames of her desire she moved her lips under his and welcomed his tongue inside her mouth.
He straightened to his full height, taking her with him so that her feet were off the floor and he held her tight against him. She clung to him as if he was her only anchor in the storm of longing that was raging through her. The feel of his hard muscular body, the taste of his mouth and the masculine scent of his aftershave seemed so familiar to her it felt like she’d lived through this moment before. Maybe it was because he had awakened that ancient womanly part of her, or maybe it was because she’d enjoyed his kisses before. Whatever it was she knew in this moment she wanted to make love with him more than she’d ever wanted anything else in her life.
