He was sitting up in bed, the sheet pulled to his waist. She couldn’t tell what he was thinking. In the short time she’d been gone, he’d erected barriers between them again. The blanket he’d given her earlier was on the floor in front of the fireplace. She padded over and picked it up, wrapping it around herself. She was glad for the warmth.
Even though the bed was only a few steps away it seemed to take her forever to get there. Marshall met her gaze, his eyes giving away nothing. “Now. Tell me why you’re really here?”
Chapter Four
Marshall waited as Talia perched on the side of the bed. She was usually so confident, it was strange to see her looking unsure of herself. It made him nervous. What was this all about?
His body was still humming from the amazing sex they’d had. It had been like old times, only the two of them, the rest of the world not even existing. There’d been the shared excitement of going on a mission, the adrenaline, the pure rush of knowing what you were doing was important for the security of the country. The danger had heightened emotions and made the sex frantic and off-the-charts. Had their relationship been solely based on proximity and the chemical rush produced by their bodies?
That didn’t explain what they’d just shared. God Almighty, he’d never experienced anything like that in his life. The frantic rush, the driving need to take Talia, claim her, mark her as his, followed by the urge to love her softly, slowly, tenderly.
Marshall shook his head and focused on Talia. He had no time to figure out what it all meant. He needed answers.
She ran her fingers over the edge of the blanket where it was wrapped around her breasts. Her arms were slender but not soft. Lean, hard muscles flowed as she shifted and raised her head to look at him.
“That day,” she began, stopping to lick her lips.
Marshall wanted to lick her lips for her. His cock stirred. Impossible. There was no way he should be able to recover quite that fast, but there was no mistaking the proof rising up to tent the sheets. He shifted, cocking one leg at an angle to hide his growing erection.
“When I was shot and the mission went to hell in a handbasket,” he prompted.
She gave a rough laugh, but there was no humor in her voice as she continued. “Yeah, that day.” She swallowed hard. “I was so damn scared. I thought you were going to die.” She closed her eyes briefly, but not before he saw the tears gathering in them.
Unable to stand her distress, he reached out and covered her hand with his. He felt her quiver beneath his touch before she turned her fingers and clasped his.
“You were bleeding so badly. The helicopter wouldn’t go fast enough. Mickey was working to stabilize you.” She opened her eyes and the tears were gone. Instead, determination filled them. “I was yelling at you.”
One corner of his mouth twitched up in a grin. “I have a vague memory of that.”
She shrugged and a light blush covered her cheeks. He was entranced by the difference it made in her. She looked young and very feminine, not at all the tough government operative he knew her to be.
“We finally got to the hospital and they rushed you into surgery. Craver pulled us out right away for a debriefing of the mission.”
Marshall snorted. “It wasn’t a mission. It was a total clusterfuck.”
“That’s putting it mildly.” Talia shifted her position and the blanket slipped slightly, revealing a hint of cleavage. Marshall did his best not to notice, but his balls tightened and his dick twitched.
“He wouldn’t tell us anything about your condition.” Her frustration was palpable. “Every channel we tried, he blocked. He insisted you were out of it even if you lived because of your injuries.”
“He wasn’t wrong,” Marshall pointed out.
Talia shook her head. “You were a team member, we had a right to know.” Her grip on his hand tightened until her knuckles turned white. Marshall didn’t even think she noticed how hard she was holding him.
“Then what?” he prompted.
She sighed and her grip loosened slightly, but she didn’t let go of him. “A few of us started thinking about what had happened. There were some things that didn’t add up. And when Armando contacted us, shocked about what happened, we started asking questions. If he hadn’t betrayed our position, who had?”
“Craver?” It was difficult to think of their own boss giving them over to the enemy for slaughter.
“Yeah.” Talia’s gaze was steady as she laid out what had happened. “Jethro and Mickey started doing some snooping. We all came to the conclusion that there was only one other person who could have sold us out. Once we knew that, we started looking for proof.”
Marshall didn’t want to think of everything that could have gone wrong if their boss had even the slightest hint that he was being investigated by his own team. “That was dangerous, Tabby.” Sure, they’d all put themselves in danger for their job, but this was different. This was fighting an enemy who knew where you were and could have you eliminated with a simple phone call.
She shrugged away his concern. “It was necessary. We found out you’d survived and your family had brought you home. You were retired.”
He gave a snort of laughter. “You could call it that.”
“I wanted to come right away,” she suddenly blurted. “But I couldn’t. Not until we’d dealt with Craver. If I’d come here, he would have gotten suspicious, might have thought you knew something, and would have sent someone to deal with you. With all of us. That’s why I didn’t answer your email and the account was deleted. We couldn’t risk any contact.”
Marshall couldn’t deny she was right. She’d told him that Craver was dirty and he’d been dealt with, but he hadn’t taken the time to consider all the implications. He excused himself for that lapse. He’d been too busy lusting after Talia at the time to think clearly.
“When did you finally get enough to hang him?”
“Eight weeks ago. Six weeks ago, we got word that the problem had been eliminated. I came as soon as I could.” She gave a self-deprecating laugh. “I made camp yesterday and planned to speak to you today, once I’d worked up enough courage to approach you.”
“Why?” That was the question he needed to know the answer to.
“I needed you to know we didn’t abandon you. I didn’t abandon you. I wanted to be with you during your surgery and hospital stay and after.” She chewed on her bottom lip. “I missed you so much.”
He swallowed his disappointment. What had he hoped for? That she’d tell him she loved him? That they’d somehow be able to make a relationship work?
He was a washed-up operative with a bum leg and a bad attitude. She was young and strong with a bright future ahead of her. The busting of Craver would be a feather in her cap and make the powers-that-be look favorable on her and the rest of the team.
His future was here on the ranch. He knew that even if he hadn’t admitted it to himself until now. He loved the land, found it healing to his body and his soul. While he might not know exactly what he was going to do yet, he had the time and the money to decide. If he never worked another day in his life, he’d live better than most folks could ever dream. Family money, coupled with what he’d made and invested over the years had left him financially healthy. Plus, his family was here and he’d missed them more than he’d realized.
But Talia was different. She was single with no close family. She’d just turned thirty and had her whole life ahead of her. It was time for him to do the right thing, to think about someone else instead of wallowing in self-pity.
She’d risked her life to get answers, to find out why he’d been shot and to bring the perpetrator to justice. Then she’d come here as soon as she could to tell him what had happened. She was breaking all sorts of rules and protocols just by being here.
“You have to leave.” His words came out harsher than he’d intended. Talia flinched, her face paling.
She tugged her fingers away from his and stood. Her features evened out, her
face becoming a mask of indifference. “I’ll be gone in five minutes.”
Marshall dragged his fingers through his hair in frustration as she got off the bed and padded over to her tangle of discarded clothing. “Fuck. I didn’t mean it that way, Tabby.” He rolled out of bed and stomped across the floor. Grabbing his jeans, he slipped them on, but didn’t fasten them. “If they find out you’re here, you’re in big trouble.”
She paused in the middle of zipping up her jeans. She’d managed to pull on her underwear and jeans but was naked from the waist up. Her breasts rose proudly, her nipples peaked, as she narrowed her eyes and glared at him. “What are you saying?”
“Damn it, Tabby, you know they’d chew your hide if they found out you were even talking to me about what happened. I’m out of it, for good. You’re not.”
She started to speak, but he cut her off. “It’s not safe.” Government organizations like the one they both belonged to didn’t like loose ends or loose cannons. She could find herself in prison, or worse.
There was only one way to get rid of her. He’d have to be cruel to be kind. Although it would probably kill him to send her away, he knew he had to do it, and do it in a way that she’d never want to return.
He cocked his hip to one side and crossed his arms over his chest. “I appreciate you coming to tell me what happened. Hell, I really appreciate the roll in the sack for old time’s sake. But I don’t want to bring the wrath of the government down on me or my family.”
He’d thought her pale before, but now she was positively ashen. “No problem for either the information or the roll in the sack. I owed you.” Her movements were jerky as she tugged on her top, not bothering with a bra. He caught a glimpse of pain in her eyes as she grabbed her pack and headed to the door.
His entire being was screaming at him not to let her go. Talia was the one for him. The only woman he’d ever loved, would ever love. She understood him in a way no one else did. Had shared the other part of his life that he’d kept separate from his family and friends.
But loving her meant doing what was best for her. That meant setting her free to live her life. She was young and healthy and, although he was only four years older than she, he felt old and was no longer the man he’d been. She deserved better than a washed-up government operative.
His feet were moving across the room before he could stop himself. Talia froze with one hand on the door handle as he reached out and touched her shoulder. “You take care of yourself.”
She gave a bitter laugh. “Sure. Whatever.”
Frustration gnawed at him. Loss ate at his heart. “You know you have to go, Tabby.”
“Don’t call me that. Not anymore. You don’t have the right.”
Her cold reply froze his soul. He didn’t have the right. He’d thrown it away while trying to do what was best for her.
She pulled open the door and hurried off the porch. Marshall stepped out behind her, suddenly unsure he was doing the right thing. What would his life be like without her? Long and lonely and bleak.
“If you get back this way,” he began and then stopped. What the hell was he doing?
She whirled on him. “And what? Stop in to get fucked? No thanks. I can get that any time, any where.”
Marshall saw red. The thought of any other man putting his hands on his Tabby, seeing her naked, touching her skin, feeling her lips move under his pushed him over the edge. He stalked toward her. She didn’t back down, but dropped her pack onto the ground and fisted her hands, ready to take him on.
He grabbed her shoulders and yanked her up onto her toes until she was staring straight into his eyes. “You’re mine.”
She gave him a siren’s smile. “Sorry, Dillon, not anymore.” The deliberate use of his code name to put them on a professional level instead of a personal one was the final straw.
He slammed his mouth down on hers, not giving her a chance to protest. He yanked her close, trying to devour her. He needed her like he needed air to breathe. More. Tabby was everything to him.
When he finally tore his lips from hers, they were both panting for breath. Before she could speak, he tossed her over his shoulder and headed back to the shack. “You had your chance to leave. It’s too late now. You’re mine.” He shouldered the door open and kicked it closed, quickly crossing the room. He tossed her down on the bed and loomed over her, daring her to try to make a run for it.
In the back of his mind, he knew he was acting crazy. He had no right to do this. Her chest was heaving as she propped herself up on her arms and glared at him. “Why? Why am I yours?”
He reached down and yanked off her boots and socks before going for the zipper on her jeans. He had to get her naked. Her hands covered his and he reared back, suddenly realizing what the hell he was doing.
He took a step back and raked his fingers through his hair. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry.” He was manhandling the woman he loved, acting like a Neanderthal idiot. If she was smart, she’d leave him the second he took his eyes off her.
“Marshall?”
The sound of his name on her lips sent him to his knees. Kneeling beside the bed, he started to reach out to her but pulled back. His control was barely holding. If he touched her, it might break entirely.
“I know you have your own life, your career. I know I have no right to ask you to think about giving it all up for a broken-down cowboy.” He tried to smile, but failed miserably. Talia was watching him, her green eyes narrowed, her lips firm. “I love you, Tabby. It almost killed me when you didn’t come see me in hospital. I thought I could do the right thing and send you away, but I can’t.”
He waited to see what reaction she’d have to his heartfelt confession. The last thing he wanted to see was pity. He didn’t expect her to love him, not the way he loved her. Not yet anyway. But he could work on that.
“You idiot.” She gave him a shove, sending him back on his ass as she climbed off the bed. He almost grinned, but fought it back. He loved a feisty woman. This feisty woman.
“You almost let me go because you thought it was right for me. Who died and made you lord and master of my life?”
“Tabby—” he began, but she cut him off.
“Don’t you ‘Tabby’ me, you man you. You were ready to let me go. You hurt me.”
All the humor drained out of him as he pushed himself to his feet and faced the woman he loved. And he did love her, temper and all.
He reached out to touch her cheek, but she slapped his hand away. “You’re not getting off that easy, buddy.”
He sighed and rubbed his hand over the scar on his chest. The gesture was unconscious, but it drew her eyes to where he’d been wounded. “I didn’t think I had the right to ask you to stay. I’m not the man I was. That part of my life is over. I know how much you love your job, Tabby.”
“I love you more.” Her soft reply almost knocked him back. Hope flared deep within him.
Talia didn’t know whether to hit Marshall again or kiss him. It was a toss-up until she saw him absently rubbing the scar on his chest. He’d been hurt enough. She hadn’t stopped to think that he’d send her away out of some misguided act of honor. She didn’t think she’d ever forget the pain in her heart when he watched her walk out the door.
Her eyes filled with tears and he reached out to catch a lone tear that trickled down her cheek. “Hey, don’t cry. I wouldn’t have let you go.” He kissed another tear away. “I wanted to do the right thing, but I need you too much.” He peppered her face with tender kisses. “I love you, Tabby.”
Those simple words helped to start healing the wounds he’d inflicted. They’d hurt one another over the past eight months, both of them trying to do the right thing.
“Marshall.”
“Shhh.” He walked her back until the edge of the bed bumped her legs. “Let me love you. We can figure everything else out after.”
She let him ease her back onto the bed, not objecting when he quickly pulled off her jeans, panties and top, leav
ing her naked. He swallowed hard as he stared at her. “You take my breath away.”
His hot gaze and his potent words made her pussy clench with need. “You have on too much clothing.”
“Yes, ma’am,” he agreed and quickly shucked his clothes and lay down beside her.
This time when they came together, they were truly making love for the first time. Neither of them held back anything as they touched and tasted and explored one another’s body. She kissed his scars, making him gasp and then groan. He licked and kissed his way from her forehead to her toes, leaving no part of her untouched.
When he finally shouldered his way between her thighs and spread her labia wide, she was ready to explode. His breath was warm and moist as he blew gently. She groaned as shivers snaked up her spine. Her nipples, already tight and red, began to ache even more.
Her breathing was uneven when he lowered his head to taste her. His tongue flicked her swollen clit before circling the opening to her channel. Talia grabbed his hair and tugged him closer. He laughed and stabbed his tongue into her.
She squirmed, trying to get him deeper. He retaliated by removing his tongue and thrusting two long, thick fingers into her. She came like a rocket. Sparks and fireworks exploded within her. Talia screamed his name as he drew out her orgasm as long as possible.
When she went boneless on the bed, he crawled over her until his hips were aligned with hers and his cock was probing at her opening. She smiled and opened her legs wider, inviting him inside.
“I love you,” he murmured as he pushed his way inside. She arched up, wanting him to be a part of her. He planted his hands on the bed, threw back his head and began to pump his hips, slowly at first, but then faster.
Talia felt the familiar sensations welling up insider her again. She’d just come, but was close again. She found his rhythm and ground her pelvis against him, the motion stimulating her clit and making her moan.
“That’s my favorite sound,” he gasped, thrusting harder. “Come again for me.”
Tracking Talia Page 4
