All I can say right now is, “Okay.”
And he heads out the door, and a second later he calls me out.
We exit the restaurant my arm inside his, with smiles of pure satisfaction. He calls for valet and walks me to my car while he waits.
“Thanks for dinner Cooper; I had an amazing time, as always.” He replies,
“I did as well. I’m happy you’re part of my life.”
He kisses me with tenderness, and wishes me safe travels and sweet dreams, and says he will be in touch. As I get in my car, I am completely shocked by what he just said. What does all of this mean?
Once I get home I remember to call my mom. As the phone rings, I pour a glass of Moscato.
“Carmen, my angel.” This is how my mother always answers.
“Hi mom.”
“I know your father called you today, I am sorry he bothered you at work, but you know how he worries about you.”
“I know mom and I am sorry I haven’t called. Things have been a little hectic.”
“What’s his name?”
I ask, “Who’s name?” How does she do that?
“Come on Carmen, you know mommy knows everything. What’s his name?”
“Work has kept me busy, but I have met someone. He works with Marcia and his name is Cooper Jackson.”
“Oohhh Cooper Jackson. That sounds sexy.”
“Really mom,” I roll my eyes.
“When are we going to meet him?”
“We just started hanging out. I am not sure if I want anything serious.” I take a huge gulp of wine.
“Honey, please do not close your heart because of what happened to your sister. You deserve to be happy.”
“Mom, I do not want to talk about this now. I have had a really long day. I wanted to hear your voice before I go to bed.”
“Okay, Angel. You get some rest. I love you so much.”
“I love you too, mom.
Chapter Ten
Two Years Ago
“Where is Celeste?” asks Marcia.
“I don’t know she isn’t answering the phone,” I say.
At that moment I knew something was wrong. Celeste is the most reliable and responsible person in the world. I do not want to call my parents and worry them, so we decide to drive to Richmond.
We arrive at the VCU dorms at 9 PM. As we approach Celeste’s room the feeling of dread is overwhelming. We knock but no one answers. Her roommate is coming down the hall and she tells us that she has not seen Celeste since Wednesday evening.
According to Ashley sometimes Celeste stays with Jermaine I keep calling Celeste and there is still no answer.
Marcia finds out where Jermaine stays. But no one has seen him since Wednesday.
“Where the fuck are they? This doesn’t make any sense. She just said she was excited to be with us this weekend,” I say.
Marcia is trying to keep me calm. “Carmen, they are young and in love. They probably decided last minute to take off somewhere.”
We both know that is not true but someone has to stay positive. My parents are home when Marcia and I come inside. They have not heard from Celeste either. My mother is panicking and my father tries to be strong, but concern is written all over his face.
Then there is a knock at the door. My father opens the door to be greeted by two officers. They inform us that a tragedy has taken place.
Chapter Eleven
The Day of My Sister’s Funeral
August 13, 2011 will always be the day that I hate. We buried my sister that day. After the police investigation, it was confirmed that Jermaine was a schizophrenic. He had stopped taking his medication and in his mind he believed that Celeste was planning on leaving him. According to witnesses he was displaying aggressive and violent behavior. No one can confirm or deny if he was physically abusing my sister, but from the stories I heard he was verbally abusive. Then the fucking bastard killed himself and left a note.
I want to apologize for what has occurred tonight. After it was done, I realized I should have just walked away, but I was selfish and allowed my love for Celeste get the best of me. I can’t live without her and know that I was the cause of the breakup. Jermaine
He has to be kidding me; he had the fucking nerve to apologize for killing my sister. I wish he was alive so I could have the pleasure of killing him.
Chapter Twelve
Present Day
For the last few days Cooper has continuously called, texted and e-mailed. I do not answer or respond, everything was said on Friday. I don’t understand why I am upset, but I am. Spending the last few months with Cooper now seems like a dream. No matter how busy he becomes he always makes me his number one priority. We spend so much time together and my favorite is always when he is inside of me. How could I have been so stupid to think he was serious about me, about having a relationship? No! I refuse to blame myself. He always called me “My Carmen” and wanted me to meet his father.
Cooper Jackson is an ass. Fuck him. Damnit. I miss him. Okay, okay. I am in love with him.
Chapter Thirteen
Cooper
I have really messed things up with Carmen. She is not answering any of my calls; even Marcia is avoiding me in the office. The call from my dad really fucked me up. He has been secretly been seeing my mom. Most kids always dream for their parents getting back together, but not me. My mother is a heartless bitch. My dad worked hard and long hours to give us an incredible life. And how does she repay him? She opens her legs for some loser. To make things worse, she cheats on my dad in our house, in their bed. My dad begged her to go to counseling and work things out, but she preferred to whore around. Bitch.
Oh my Carmen, it has only been a few days, but I miss her. Her smile, laugh, lips everything about her. She has brought unmeasurable pleasure to my life. I never thought I would find happiness. Carmen is my world. And I may have lost her forever. Maybe I do not deserve happiness, but I need her.
Hearing David blow the horn, I get my jacket and head out. “David, I have to get her back.”
“Yeah I am looking forward to meeting the girl who stole your heart,” he says as we make our way to Marvin’s.
David has been my best friend since elementary school. He just got back from being in Paris for the grand opening of the latest hotel his company has designed. Tonight I have to put my issues on the back burner and celebrate his return.
Chapter Fourteen
Carmen
Marcia has the bright idea that I need to go out and drink away my sorrows. She is only giving me one night to wallow in my misery. Tomorrow I need to figure out how to handle Cooper.
Tonight I am getting drunk. We walk into Marvin’s; the atmosphere is an old tavern style. The floors are hardwood, but lack the shiny finish. To the right sit tables which are occupied tonight. It’s like walking into a meat market, no wonder Marcia suggested this shit.
“Point me to the bar,” I order.
There are pool tables on my left. The way I feel pool may be a great stress reliever. She points her finger towards what seems to be a second entrance. While passing the tables, I notice so many dishes and drinks that I can barely see the cream linen that covers it. I push through the shiny handle that leads to the bar side, and there is the perfectly shaped oval mahogany bar. It is dull in color as well, so that it too fits in with the rustic look. A total of four bartenders serve the circle of already seated civilians. All kinds of liquor fill the back wall; such a large selection to assist in removing my pain. Getting the bartenders attention, I order 4 shots of Patron and a Corona.
Marcia just shakes her head saying, “This is going to be a long night.”
“Shut up Marcia, this is my night of self-pity and you have the pleasure of driving my drunken ass around. Do it with a smile.”
“Carmen, you know I got you, but seriously, tomorrow when Giselle comes back we are going to have a long talk. I love you and you need to hear Cooper out.”
“I do not want to talk ab
out Cooper anymore tonight. They have a dance floor and the DJ is setting up. This is going to be a good night,” I say.
Ordering another round of shots, I am starting to feel intoxicated. Great. I remember that I forgot to eat today. “I think we should order something to eat, haven’t eaten all day,” I say.
Marcia rolls her eyes and asks, “Okay, what do you want?”
Out of the corner of my eye, I think I see Cooper sitting at a table with a good looking man. “Marcia, I am tripping because I am seeing Cooper.”
Marcia looks around and says, “You aren’t tripping he is here and walking this way.”
Fuck. I am not ready to see him. My stomach feels sick.
“Carmen, we need to talk,” he says.
“There is nothing to talk about. Please leave me alone.”
“Is that what you really want?” He seems to be waiting for me to answer, but then says, “I can’t.”
“Cooper you made it clear on Friday how you feel.”
Oh shit I feel the vomit rising. I need to get out of here. Rushing out of the bar, I can’t fight it any longer. Covering my mouth, barely making it out; I puke everywhere. It’s revolting, but I can’t stop. There is vomit all over my grey sweater and red cashmere scarf. Thank goodness my black leather jacket is open, but my hair was not as lucky. Someone hands me napkins. It is Cooper.
“Didn’t I tell you to leave?”
“Carmen, you are drunk and need to go home. Let me take you.”
This is the Cooper I know, the one who is caring and concerned about me. But it’s a lie.
“Marcia will take me home. Go get her.”
“Marcia and David are talking. Do you really want to ruin her evening?”
“Who the fuck is David? Your best friend, David? He is probably a jackass, just like you.”
“That’s enough. I am taking you home and cleaning you up.”
“Fuck you, Cooper.”
“I know my Carmen, let’s go.”
Cooper tells Marcia we are leaving. She looks to see if everything is okay, I nod my head.
We arrive at my apartment, and Cooper carries me in. Even in my drunken state, I’m fully aware of his presence. It’s hard to stay mad at him; I’m just unsure how to feel at this point. He keeps apologizing; I tell him I am not interested in what he has to say. Why do I refuse to give in to my feelings? I really need to brush my teeth. Many memories of Celeste surface to my mind as he leads me to the bathroom.
He cautiously undresses me to avoid the remnants of my earlier vomiting episode. Cooper then removes his clothing runs the warm water in my shower stall. I use the double sink countertop to balance myself. I turn and press the shuffle button, my iPod soon comes to life. It’s playing songs I randomly selected and titled in a playlist, “That Bastard Cooper.” I begin to brush my teeth and start daydreaming.
Lost in space, I barely feel his hand on mine leading me to the shower where he guides me in. As he begins to wash me, I relive our passionate times we have shared. One of John Legends latest tracks begins to play “All of me.” I just want to pull him all over me but my heart won’t allow it.
Cooper says, “I understand why you’ve been avoiding me and I’m really sorry about Friday night.”
“I don’t want to hear anything you have to say. The only reason you’re allowed here right now is because I’m drunk.” I turn my head and fight back the tears.
Cooper remains silent as he begins to wash my hair. He breaks the silence saying he missed me.
I close my eyes and say, “You didn’t miss me, you just missed fucking me. Do you really think I’m the type of girl who just has casual sex? Don’t you see all the red and hearts everywhere? You should have known better.” He places me in the stream of water to rinse my hair.
“Carmen, the things I said, I didn’t mean. It was out of anger.”
“I can’t, I just can’t. I’m tired and hungry.” He softly kisses me on my forehead.
I’m comfy and cozy in my bed while I wait for Cooper to bring me some chicken noodle soup. God I’ve missed him so much, just having him here and smelling his Ralph Lauren Polo Black cologne is pure torture. Cooper wants to feed me the soup.
“No, I can feed myself, I don’t need any assistance.”
“Don’t fight me, let me does this for you,” he persists.
Since I’m too exhausted to argue, I give in to his request of feeding me. Now that my belly’s full, I’m ready to go to sleep. Cooper tucks me in and says good night.
“Don’t leave,” I say before he exits the door.
Never saying a word he removes his shirt and pants. Turns off the light and climbs in the bed with me.
“This doesn’t change anything.”
“Oh yes it does my Carmen, it changes everything.”
Chapter Fifteen
Waking up with a hangover is something I haven’t experienced in years. When I open my eyes, Cooper isn’t in the bed and his clothes are gone. I knew what he was saying was bullshit, but why did he take such good care of me last night? He frustrates me. There are two pills and a bottle of water on my night stand. Damn, he thinks of everything. I pop the pills and go to the bathroom to freshen up. Staring in the mirror, I look tired and my eyes are puffy. Being in love and heartbroken at the same time isn’t the best look for me. I need to talk to Marcia, she will set me straight.
The smell of bacon is in the air. I hear voices in the kitchen. Surprised to see Cooper, I smile. Marcia is sitting at our bar top, which is an elegant piece of aluminum. It has a wavy front edge, and is paired nicely with bar stools, square in shape. They resemble the ones at Leo’s, only ours are red. They circle out at the bottom, the setting compliments of stainless steel. David is busy at the stove flipping pancakes. I notice he is wearing pajamas, where did those come from?
Cooper sees me. He stands up pulling a chair out for me and says, “Good morning beautiful. How are you feeling?”
“Okay, I am tired with a slight headache.” Cooper rubs my back and kisses the top of my head.
Marcia says, “David offered to make us breakfast. Since you guys were not introduced last night, David, this is my best friend, Carmen.”
“Nice to meet you,” he replies in kind voice.
“Same here. Did you stay here last night?”
“Yes, but I slept on the couch.” Looking at the couch, there are blankets and a pillow. “That was very gentlemanly of you,” I say.
He smiles, “Well, Carmen, we all aren’t jackasses like Cooper.”
Outraged, I ask Cooper, “Why did you tell him I said that?” Before Cooper could answer.
Marcia says, “You were so loud, everyone heard you.”
Marcia offers to help David in preparing breakfast. David continues making eggs, and pancakes made with fresh blueberries. The aroma makes me hungry.
“There are biscuits in the oven, in case someone wants to make a bacon, egg, and cheese,” calls David. “However, I will leave Marcia in charge of those.”
He sends a wink in her direction. Cooper and I look at each other and laugh because we both know Marcia thinks cooking is choosing from a menu. She realizes we are laughing at her and she flicks us off when David is not looking. My eyes focus on his pajamas again, and I start to think if this was all planned. Did they plan to run into us at Marvin’s? Was David supposed to be Cooper’s designated driver as he drank his sorrows away, the same role Marcia would take on for me? Later I find out that David was prepared to stay over at Cooper’s. I notice Marcia watching David. It is obvious she is definitely into him. I can clearly see why.
He is no Cooper, but he is a few inches taller. David seems to be in great shape. He has a close haircut that has been recently shaped up. His greenish-blue eyes are beautiful against his light brown skin. I wonder if this will lead anywhere. She tells him to scoot over so she can check the biscuits. She’s definitely taking this task seriously. I chuckle to myself. David informs us we should be eating in five minutes. The butter
and maple syrup is already placed on the kitchen table in our dining room.
The red dishes give the glass table top some much needed color. A fork and knife have already been set on each side of the placemat. Fresh fruit is in a silver bowl that is in the middle of the table. There’s a pitcher of cranberry juice sitting on the bar. Coffee is made for those who may need a jump start. We have Keurig machine, thanks to Marcia and her unhealthy caffeine habits. She has already had three cups today and she is wired. She playfully swats David with the dish towel when he carries the pancakes to the table. There are four chairs around the rectangular glass, one on each end. Two sides are made of red plush material, and the other sides are animal print
They all resemble the shape of a high heel. These are very special pieces of furniture to us because we both love heels and more importantly, Celeste found them for us. Cooper excuses himself to my room. He comes back within a couple of minutes, so I figured he went to the bathroom. The eggs and bacon arrive at the table, along with the biscuits. I dive in and retrieved two pancakes and douse them with butter and syrup. In the middle of cutting them, Cooper hands me the bacon and I grab two slices and put it on my plate. Marcia and David are giggling at her joke of being a chef since the biscuits didn’t burn. Biting into the fresh blueberries brings joy to my stomach. Since the argument it has been neglected. Cooper is coating his pancakes with syrup. I can think of more useful ways to use that syrup. He smiles at me before complimenting David on the pancakes.
“Did you go to a class in order to learn how to make them perfect?” Cooper says in a joking manner.
“Always jealous of me,” David says laughing. “My being able to cook is what got me through college.”
“I think everything is wonderful, especially the biscuits,” Marcia adds.
All I can do is laugh. I look around and I feel blessed to have them all here. It is crazy that I have never allowed myself to have this kind of connection with any man. This feels like a fairy tale. Maybe I’ll have my happy ending. I thought I wasn’t made to love, but Cooper makes me have second thoughts. Then our eyes meet and I give him a lustful look. As if reading my mind, Marcia nominates her and David for cleanup duties. I smile, as Cooper stands and comes to where I’m seated reaching out for my hand. He walks with me hand in hand to my room.
Made to Love: Carmen and Cooper's Story Page 5
