by A. C. Meyer
He gradually slows down until we break apart and he smiles at me, his breath as uneven as mine is.
“Oh, Mari . . .” he sighs and pushes a lock of hair behind my ear. I smile and he gives me a soft peck. “I’ll drive you home before I break my promise.” What? Promise? Home? Noooo!
He gets up and gives me his hand. I do my best to get up as gracefully as possible. We follow the hallway to the exit and before he opens the door, I hold his hand and say, unable to control my smile, “Thank you.” He looks at me curiously and I continue, “For the best sunrise I’ve ever seen.”
He cracks that smile and I can almost float, I feel so happy.
We drive all the way to my house, this time in his car, talking about traveling. He travels a lot and tells me about all the places he’s been to and loved. We get to my building too fast and he gets out first to open the door for me.
“Thanks for this evening, Mari,” he murmurs, looking a bit bashful. I smile and he smiles back, kissing my face softly. Then he gives me space to walk to my building while he leans on the car and crosses his arms, waiting.
I look back before I go in and when I see him, I feel like Cinderella coming back from the ball, except that in this version, Prince Charming walks her there. I wave to him, he waves back then gets in his car, going away and taking my heart with him.
I sleep through a good part of Saturday, after spending the whole night awake. Finally, at five p.m., I wake up to the phone ringing.
“You bitch, I’ll kill you!” Lais yells before I even get a chance to say hello.
“Oh, what happened?” I ask, still sleepy.
“You didn’t call me to tell me all about your night with your hot boss! And FOR CHRIST’S SAKE! What was that? Gorgeous! Hot! Everything! Why the hell have you never made a move on him before, girl?” she asks and we both laugh.
“I’m sorry, Lais. I got home at seven a.m.” I explain, and she gives a loud cry over the phone. “Oh, stop it! I just woke up!”
“I want to know everything!” And then I tell her all that happened throughout my incredible night.
Needless to say, I’m in love. I can hear it in my own voice how happy I am. I have no idea what things will be like from now on but I’m sure we’ll figure something out.
“Oh, sweetheart, I’m so happy for you. Do you think he’s going to call you over the weekend? Is he your boyfriend now?”
“I don’t know if he’ll call and I don’t know what we are, Lais. All I know is I’m happy like I’ve never been,” I say, and then remember Lais also hooked up with a guy last night. “What about you, girl? How were things with Mr. Hot Pants?”
“Oh, Rodrigo! He’s handsome, isn’t he? He’s a lawyer. He’s got my number, but I don’t think he’s going to call.”
“Why?”
“Oh, I don’t know. We’re very different, you know,” she says and I know exactly what she means. “Are you going to the lunch party tomorrow?” she asks.
“As if I would miss it! They’re picking me up,” I say, and we both laugh.
“What about today, do you want to go out?” she asks, but I’m too lazy to do anything.
“Oh . . . I don’t think so. I’ll get up, take a shower, and organize a few things for the week.”
“All right, I’ll be here. If you want to watch a movie or something, come over. We can make popcorn,” she says and I smile, happy to be her friend. Lais is an incredible friend.
“Okay, Lais. Talk to you later.” We say goodbye and I check the phone, curious to see if there are any new text messages. I can’t help feeling a little bit sad when none from him pop up.
I try to be positive, thinking that maybe he’s sleeping, just like I was until a few minutes ago. I decide to take a shower, do whatever I have to do, and enjoy the feeling of happiness the previous night gave me instead of letting dumb insecurities bring my mood down.
We have a fun day. Our parents live in a community where people have known each other for years. It’s almost like they’re all a big family. At least once a month we get together for lunch and it’s always very cheerful and fun. It’s nice to get a taste of homemade food and have some time with the family.
Around six thirty p.m., Lais receives a call and goes outside to pick it up. That’s when my mother sits beside me and throws the usual questions at me.
“How are you? How’s work? Any new boys I should know of?”
“I’m fine, Mom. Work is fine and all my boyfriends are fictional.”
She laughs, but goes on. “But there’s got to be someone. I’ve seen you checking your phone a few times,” she says and I smile. I don’t want to bother my mother telling her I went on a date with my boss.
“It’s nothing, Mom.”
“If you ever want to talk, Mom is here.” She hugs me.
“I know.” I smile and kiss her cheek. Then Lais walks in the room.
“Mari, would you mind if we go now?” she asks and it weirds me out a little, but I don’t object. We say goodbye and get the bus back home.
“Is everything okay?” I ask, once we’re sitting.
“Yeah, it’s just that Rodrigo called me,” she explains, looking happy. I smile, happy for her.
“Really? What did he say?”
“Oh, he asked me out to eat.”
“And where are you going?” I ask.
“To that pub that we love,” she says, meaning an open-air area filled with bars in a shopping center near home. “Can you help me do something with my hair?”
“Of course! You’ll look beautiful,” I answer, laughing and already thinking about what to do with her hair. While mine is long, straight and brown, hers is wavy and blond.
We get off at our stop talking about what outfit she’ll wear, as excited as two teenagers. It’s seven p.m. and Rodrigo will stop by to pick her up in one hour. We hurry to get everything ready and at a quarter to eight she’s ready and looking fabulous.
“You look perfect!”
“Oh! I’m so nervous!”
“Don’t be, it’s going to be fine.”
A few minutes later, Rodrigo arrives and we go downstairs to meet him. We say goodbye by the gate and I wave at him while he climbs out of the car. He’s really handsome. Blond, tall, light eyes. He’s not like the guys she usually goes out with but they do make a beautiful couple. Lais is beautiful and tall, with a contagious kind of smile. She’s a wonderful friend and I hope she finds a nice guy who really cares for her.
“Marina, right?” he asks me and I smile, used to people getting my name wrong.
“Mariana. How are you?”
“I’m sorry! Mariana! I’m fine, how about you?” He smiles and Lais and I share an excited look.
“I’m fine. Well, I’m going home. Bye, Lais.” I hug her and, whisper, “Call me if you need anything, okay?”
“I will.”
“Bye, Rodrigo!” I wave and go to my apartment, humming a song while my friend goes on a date with her new hottie.
Cadu
I get to the office earlier than usual. I’ve been restless since Saturday. After I dropped Mari at her place, I went home, climbed into bed, and slept until the evening. When I woke up, I took a shower and I was planning on calling her when the intercom buzzed. It was the doorman letting me know my brother, my sister-in-law, and my nephews had arrived. I let them come up and decided to call her once they were gone.
Zeca is older than me and he’s been married to Lucinha for five years. They have three-year-old twins. We are very close and I consider them not only family but, my friends.
I made us dinner and at some point, I ended up sharing too much and talking about Mari. I didn’t tell them who she is, just said I met a girl and told them where she lived. They heard the whole story, but Lucinha looked worried.
“Cadu, do you think it’s worth it t
o start a relationship with this girl?” I look at her confused by what she’s saying. “You barely know her and she’s not in our social circle. Besides, she lives so far away. Judging from where she lives, she’s definitely from a poorer walk of life,” she points out and my brother nods in agreement.
“If you consider what Lucinha is saying, then I have to agree. I don’t mean to judge, brother, but you’re ‘a catch.’ You have money, you manage a popular magazine . . . I don’t know, I think you should consider if you really want to get involved with a person who may turn out to be in it just for the money,” he said.
I started thinking about last night and I remember the small comments that caught my attention . . . I knew they were right. It was risky indeed, no matter how taken I was. Not so much about where she lived, but for the simple fact she and I work together.
“I’m sorry, Cadu, but it reminds me of what happened to my dad, you know?” she says and I nod in agreement. Lucinha’s father got involved with a girl who looked like an angel. She was sweet, nice and delicate, but eventually she almost sucked him dry.
When they left, I thought about it and decided not to call. While I remembered her sweet and gentle manner and thought it impossible that she could be faking it, I also couldn’t stop thinking about that kiss on my bed. It drove me crazy. She had gone from kitten to tigress in the blink of an eye, and it just proved that my brother and my sister-in-law might be right.
On Sunday, after giving it much thought, I decided to end whatever happened between us first thing on Monday morning. I didn’t want to lose my assistant for an affair that might end poorly or even end up doing me harm.
After sitting in my office for about an hour, I hear noise in the neighboring office. She’s here. I take the phone and call her desk.
“Mariana, could you come over, please?”
“Sure, just a second.”
Less than five minutes later, she walks in smiling and carrying the coffee tray. When she looks at me, her smile fades a bit. I feel my chest tighten, but I stick to the plan.
“Sit down, please,” I say, pointing at the chair in front of me. She sits, her brown eyes wide open. I say everything at once, before I chicken out. “Mariana, I thought a lot about this during the weekend. I must apologize. I crossed a line with you and I shouldn’t have done it. We work together and things might get complicated.” I look somewhere beyond her, not having the guts to look her in the eyes. A low moan catches my attention and I see her looking down, a hand covering her mouth in a baffled expression. It makes my stomach hurt but there’s no going back now. “I wanted to ask you to forget what happened last Friday and . . .” I can’t finish it.
She gets up, takes a deep breath and says, “Of course, Carlos Eduardo. No problem. I need to answer a few e-mails we got over the weekend. Will that be all?” she asks and I nod.
“Sure, Mariana. Thank you,” I say, surprised at her reaction. She walks out the room without a word and closes the door. I feel bad, like that door is a real barrier between me and something I want really badly, despite it being no good for me. I just hope I won’t regret this later.
I lock myself in the bathroom and only then do I fall apart. Tears of heartache, disappointment and shame fall uncontrollably. I can’t believe this is happening. Why did he even bother to come after me and insist on it if he wasn’t even interested in me to begin with? Stupid! Stupid! Stupid! He probably thought I was just another stupid poor girl who would fall for him easily. Still crying, I grab my phone from my pocket and send Lais an e-mail.
From: Mariana Costa
To: Lais Menezes
Subject: Heeeeeeelp!!!!!!
I’m crushed. He just dumped me.
From: Lais Menezes
To: Mariana Costa
Subject: RE: Heeeeeeelp!!!!!!
WHAT???? I’m so gonna punch this jackass. Where r u? He didn’t fire you, did he?
From: Mariana Costa
To: Lais Menezes
Subject: RE: RE: Heeeeeeelp!!!!!!
No!! I’m in the bathroom, breathless and crying like a baby. I want to go home and hide. I’M SO STUPID!!!
From: Lais Menezes
To: Mariana Costa
Subject: RE: RE: RE: Heeeeeeelp!!!!!!
No! U’r gonna take a deep breath, wash your face, put some makeup on and work as if nothing has happened. I’ll send something to you. We’ll drown in ice cream later tonight. Man, I can’t believe this idiot did that!
From: Mariana Costa
To: Lais Menezes
Subject: RE: RE: RE: RE: Heeeeeeelp!!!!!!
From: Lais Menezes
To: Mariana Costa
Subject: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: Heeeeeeelp!!!!!!
Try to see it from this angle: he’s an idiot. He’s a rich bastard with a tiny dick. You deserve better.
From: Mariana Costa
To: Lais Menezes
Subject: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: Heeeeeeelp!!!!!!
Oh, buddy. It isn’t tiny
From: Lais Menezes
To: Mariana Costa
Subject: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: Heeeeeeelp!!!!!!
You bitch! U said u didn’t sleep with him!
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PS: Is it big?
From: Mariana Costa
To: Lais Menezes
Subject: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: Heeeeeeelp!!!!!!
And I didn’t! What do you take me for? Hahahahahaha but I did feel it.
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PS: Yeah, it’s pretty big!
I’m a wreck for the rest of the day. I’m depressed and I can’t wait to go home, but I need to stand strong even though I’m a mess inside. Cadu spends the whole morning locked in his office. That jackass sent me an e-mail asking me to cancel all his meetings. Almost one hour after my bathroom breakdown, a courier brings me a package. That’s odd. I haven’t ordered anything!
It’s a small box. Inside I find five chocolate bars and a handwritten note with several hearts drawn in it. I soon realize what it is:
At lunchtime, I get up when I hear noise coming from his office and I run to the bathroom to avoid him. I don’t feel like eating or leaving the office. I just want this day to be over. But I’m still not ready to face him. I cry a bit more in the bathroom and when it’s near the time he usually gets back, I calm down, do a touch-up, and breathe in a few times.
The afternoon drags on. He doesn’t leave his office and I’m grateful for it. We communicate exclusively through e-mail and I breathe a sigh of relief when the day is over. I get my stuff and when I’m ready to leave, I knock on the jackass’s door and leave it slightly open, as I do every day.
“Excuse me,” I say, surprised to see his chair turned to the window and to the view, instead of to his computer like it always is. He turns to me, seeming surprised to see me there. “I’m leaving. Do you need anything?” I try to sound as professional as possible.
“No . . . you can go, Mariana” he answers and I nod. When I’m almost closing the door, he calls me again. “Mariana?”
“Yes?” I open the door again. My heart is beating so fast it’s like I’ve just run a marathon.
“Are you all right?” he asks, and I want to punch him in the face. I’ve spent the whole day trying to get a hold of my emotions so I could talk to him before I left, and he decides to ruin everything right when I was succeeding? Breathe in and out, Mari.
“Am I all right? Yes, of course! Why wouldn’t I be?” I ask, managing to keep my voice steady. “Well, I’m sorry, but I have to run. I have stuff to do.”
“Of course. Good night.”
“Good night,” I answer, then close the door.
I go home feeling extremely upset, but not kn
owing exactly why. I should be glad Mari took my talk about us so well. But truth is, I feel sad. I walk into my apartment, take off my tie and my suit, and go straight to the shower. I take a long shower and when I finish, I put a towel around my waist and walk around the house. There, in the silence, the penthouse seems too big for me. I go to the bar and pour myself some whiskey. I drink it all in one gulp and decide to go to bed. I’m probably tired, that must be it. I go in my room, lie down on my bed, and close my eyes. At the same time, a sweet perfume takes over me, and a pair of expressive brown eyes come to my mind. Shit. I’m obsessing over a woman just because I can’t have her. My cell phone rings and I take it from my nightstand. It’s Miguel.
“Hey, man!”
“Hey, Cadu, what’s up? I tried calling you today, but Ms. Dragon wouldn’t put me through.”
“Who?” I ask, confused.
“Ms. Dragon, your moody secretary.”
“Don’t talk about her like that, Miguel. I asked her not to be disturbed today. I was busy.”
“Oh, she’s pretty and all. But she looks like she can bite my head off,” he says and laughs. “Though if she wanted to bite me somewhere else, I wouldn’t say no to it.” He laughs out loud and the joke pisses me off.
That’s Miguel, who thinks every woman on the planet is an object. He never gets involved with anyone. He goes on dates for a while then dumps them. Yeah, I know you’re going to say I’m like that too, but I’m always very clear to the women I go out with that I don’t want anything serious. This way, there’s no expectation. He does everything to make them fall in love with him, no matter the cost.
