by Peach, Hanna
“So what do you do?”
He raises an eyebrow at me. “Seriously? You haven’t figured it out?”
I frown. I guess I am missing something but… “What? I don’t get it.”
He laughs again. “You are funny, princess. So innocent. So fresh and uncomplicated. See all this,” he holds out his hands and waves to the club, “this belongs to me and my family.”
Then it hits me. Tyrell. Jacob Tyrell. Of the Tyrell family. The Tyrells own over half the night clubs in this city. That’s why the bar staff snapped to attention. That’s why he has goon and gooner flanking him. That’s why those plastic girls were so upset when I came and stole their meal ticket. That’s why he didn’t have to pay for the champagne. He owns it all anyway.
I shake my head, trying to clear it. “I don’t want anything from you, Jacob.”
He smiles. “I know. Which makes me want to give everything to you. You haven’t had much luck in your life, but I plan on changing that.”
Jacob is true to his word. He doesn’t try to kiss me. Once or twice I catch him touching my hair. Once I catch him as he brings the ends of the strands up to his nose to smell.
When I start to yawn, Jacob takes me by the hand and leads me through the club to a side exit, where a long black limousine is waiting.
“Are you for real?” I say when the driver gets out, opens the door and I realize this limo is for us.
Jacob chuckles and helps me get into the car. He holds my hand until we get to the base of my dorm; he insists on driving all the way to the door. He hands me his phone and tells me to program my number into it. Then he kisses me on the knuckles goodbye. “Good night, princess. I’ll see you soon.”
I watch the limo drive out of the gates from the front window of the dorm lobby.
As I unlock the door to my dorm room my phone buzzes with a text. I’ll pick you up at 8 tomorrow night, princess.
Chapter 19
The present
On our first date Jacob took me to one of the restaurants that his family owned. When I walked into the empty place, I frowned until I realized he had closed the whole place down just for me. Later that night we had our first kiss.
“We’re made for each other. You know how I know?”
I shake my head.
“You’re unpredictable, princess. Different. Like me.” He leans in so close I can smell the cognac on his lips. It thrills and scares me to have him this close to me.
I can still remember the taste of liquor on him, the insistent way his tongue probed my mouth as if he owned it.
Oh God.
I am sitting here drinking coffee in a restaurant owned by the Tyrells. I knew that they owned lots of properties and businesses across the country, but I never got the full list. I knew it would be a possibility that the cities I ran to would have a tie to them. But I never imagined that I would walk straight into one of their properties. And I never imagined that Cade would lead me to them.
My mind seems stuck like a skipped record. Oh God. Oh shit. Oh God. What if they’re here? What if Jacob’s here? He can’t still be looking for me, can he?
“Your body, your blood, your life belong to me.”
I recognize this familiar feeling of numbness and cold pins and needles across my skin. I’m in shock. I try to snap myself out of it. I need to get the hell out of here. But I can’t move. My muscles seem to have seized up. Everything feels like it’s going very slowly. Everything sounds muffled as if I have shoved cotton wool in my ears.
I realize too late that the latte glass is slipping from my fingers. It hits the saucer with a crash that echoes menacingly through my haze. Coffee splashes over the table and starts to dribble off the sides. The spray of hot liquid into my lap seems to snap me out of my shock. I look up in fear as I hear someone rushing for me.
But it’s only the waiter running over to me with a cloth. Oh God. The restaurant has gone quiet. Everyone is looking at me. Oh God. Everyone is looking at me. In a restaurant owned by the Tyrells.
“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry,” I mutter as I dab helplessly at the pool of pale brown liquid with a sopping napkin, keeping my head down so that my face is hidden. “I’m such a klutz.”
“It isn’t a problem, madam. Let me do that for you. Here, for your clothes.” He hands me a stack of napkins. I sit with my chin buried in my chest, pretending to focus on cleaning myself up as the waiter wipes down the table with his cloth. I want to run out of here. All my instincts are screaming for me to run, panic clawing at the insides of my throat. But the waiter is blocking my path. He won’t let me out. He’s doing it on purpose. I’m trapped. Trapped in the corner of this booth.
“I shall get you another latte, madam.”
“No!” And I swallow when I realize that I have just shouted, causing the other patrons to look over again. Too much attention. Way too much attention. I clear my throat and try to smile. “I’m sorry. I’ve just realized I have an appointment that I forgot about. How much do I owe you for the latte?” I scramble around in my bag looking for my wallet.
“That’s fine, madam. It’s on the house.”
I look up in surprise. I catch his eye and quickly look down. Does he know who I am?
I look around the waiter slowly, barely daring to breathe, convinced that Jacob will materialize out of the photo to stand before me, my nightmares made flesh. My heart lurches and my eyelids flutter shut in some desperate notion that if I just wish hard enough, everyone will go away.
“Are you okay, madam?”
My eyes open. But Jacob isn’t here. Just the waiter peering at me with concern. Not recognition, just concern.
Breathe, woman. Jacob isn’t here.
“Fine. Thank you. Sorry again.” I grab my bag and my knuckles turn white from the grip of my fists. I walk out without another look at the waiter. Or perhaps I run.
Why was Caden here? Was that really Jacob in the photo or someone who looked just like him? What does this mean? What the hell does this mean? Am I overreacting? Was this just a coincidence?
Do I even believe in coincidences?
I should have seen the signs, but back then I didn’t know what to look for. Jacob insisted on seeing me every day that he could after that. He told me that he was falling in love with me on our third date. Part of me told myself that this was all moving too fast, too intense. But the other part of me felt so good to be wanted, so good to be loved.
Three weeks later I said I loved him back. And only then did I agree to sleep with him…
Chapter 20
Five years ago
“Bounce up and down on me. Come on baby.”
I bite my lip but continue to move slowly over Jacob. I need to get used to him. I have had sex only once before, so to be naked with someone still feels strange and uncomfortable. He watches me from below with a smirk to his lips. My face heats. Can he see the inexperience in me? Is he laughing at me?
“Look at you, little princess.” He reaches out and pinches my clit, hard. I flinch. Too hard. “All fresh and new just for me.”
Then from where he pinched, a heat bursts out like a small bottle rocket. I start to rock a little faster.
“That’s it. Come on.”
And faster.
I hear a loud slap and a hot sting on my ass. I cry out. And glance down in time to see his hand come down on me again. Crack. I flinch as the fire spreads across my skin.
“Jacob, that hurts.” I look back to him with pleading eyes. But there is no sympathy in his. The smirk is still on his face.
“It’s pain, baby. It’s part of life. But pain can feel good. So good.” He digs the fingers of one hand into my hip, pinches my nipple with the other and starts to thrust up into me.
After this first time together, Jacob convinces me to cut my classes for tomorrow and Tuesday and keeps me in bed for the whole time. He loves me, can’t get enough of me, wants me all to himself. By early Wednesday morning I’m sore from the amount of sex we’ve had. But it feels g
ood that he needs me so much.
A weird awareness sits under my skin like an itch. I need to escape this bubble and pay some attention to the rest of my life – school, study, work, friends. Shit, and I haven’t called my grandparents in days. They’ll be worried. I slip out of bed and dress while he dozes.
I hear him grunt behind me as I gather my things. “I’m not letting you leave.”
When I spin around he’s sitting on the edge of the bed, covered only by a slip of sheet across his lap. His face is adorably crinkled from sleep and his hair is mussed. I laugh and walk over to him, slipping between his knees. I kiss his nose. “I need to go to class.”
“But I have some business to take care of tonight and tomorrow. If you leave now I won’t see you again until Friday.”
“I have to keep up my classes if I want to graduate.”
“I told you, you don’t need to work. I can look after you.”
I pout. “Then I’ll be no better than those gold diggers you so despise.”
He grunts again. But I can see the slip of acceptance on his face. I bend down and kiss him thoroughly on the mouth and curl my fingers through his hair. His hands slip up my legs, into my skirt. I feel him twitching beneath the sheet. I untangle myself from him before we get carried away. Again. I walk across the room to shove the last of my stuff in my bag.
“I’m sending Snake with you. He can look after you until Friday.”
I spin around. “What?”
Jacob is leaning back on the bed with a satisfied look on his face. “Yeah. Snake can look after you while you’re not with me. Just until I find someone I trust to do it full-time.”
My mouth drops open. A chill begins to grip me. “No.”
Jacob pouts again. “This way I can make sure you’re safe.”
“You mean to tell me that you want Snake come to class with me, hang around while I eat lunch, study at the library, go to sleep?” This is absurd. I can’t even begin to describe how friggin’ absurd it is. I can’t believe Jacob is even suggesting this. “What about the bathroom? Is he going to stand and watch while I have a shower, too?”
Jacob growls. “No, he can fucking wait outside.”
“No. No way, Jacob.”
“I just want to protect what’s mine, princess.”
“I’m not having Snake follow me around all day.”
“Then I’ll send Garfield.”
I stare at him. He’s serious. He is so serious. What the hell is this really about? “Don’t you trust me?”
“You, I trust. It’s all those assholes who want a piece of you that I don’t. I love you, do you understand? I fucking love you.”
My heart clenches. He looks so desperate and pained. I make my voice softer. “Jacob, I love you too. But I won’t have anyone follow me around, okay? Not Garfield, not anyone and definitely not Snake.” I sigh. “Please, I don’t want to fight, baby. I’m going to class – alone. I’ll see you on Friday, okay?”
He says nothing. But as we kiss goodbye I can’t help the oddest feeling that curls uncomfortably in my stomach. Something doesn’t feel right.
All day and all the next day this feeling grips me. Finally, I decide I need to take a step away from Jacob. I need some space. Not to break up, just some space. I’m not sure what I’m going to say to him to make him understand, but I have to say something. As Friday approaches this feeling of dread grows.
“I have a surprise for you, princess.” Jacob greets me with a grin when I arrive at his apartment on Friday afternoon after my last class for the week.
“Oh?” I say. Then I feel a small stab of guilt. He has a surprise for me? And I’m about to tell him I need some space.
Jacob’s smile twists into a scowl. “I thought you’d be happy. I have a surprise for you. I thought long and hard over the last two days about what my princess would like most.”
I’m being such a brat. God, I was raised better than this. I send a smile to my face and reach for him. “I am happy, baby. Sorry, I was just distracted. Study stuff.”
He frowns. “You shouldn’t be distracted when you’re with me. Maybe you should cut back on school if it’s too much.”
Oh my God, I’m not going there. I ignore this comment and force as much lightness as I can to my voice. “So what’s this amazing surprise you have for me?”
A grin creeps across his handsome face. “I paid off your student loan.”
I laugh and pat him lightly on his chest. “Aw, Jacob. Seriously.”
“Seriously.”
“I paid off your student loan.” This single sentence circles around my head like a vulture looking for somewhere to land. Then it sinks in. And I am left still and stricken as its claws grip around my bones.
“Oh my God, Jacob. You didn’t.”
“I did.”
“Why?” Why would he do that?
The grin on his face starts to tighten. “Because I love you. I know you stress about making your loan payments, so I’ve taken away the problem. You’re mine and I take care of what’s mine, princess.” He scowls. “Now you don’t have to work at that shitty bar job.”
“I need my job, Jacob. I still need to eat.” Fuck. I have to pay him back.
Yeah? With what fucking money? I can’t pay him back. How the hell am I supposed to pay him back?
“You shouldn’t have.” God. I sound so ungrateful, like one of those gold diggers that he hates. I’m as bad as one of them. What’s wrong with me that I can’t be happy about this? I can see on his face that he is thinking this, too.
I’m a terrible girlfriend. I should be happy that he did this wonderful thing for me. So why aren’t I?
Because now, I owe him.
And I know there is only one way I can pay him back. Only one way he expects me to pay him back. I can see it in the expectant smirk on his face. “Aren’t you going to thank me?”
“Thank you, baby.” I lean forward to kiss him.
His fingers twist into my hair and he pulls my head back. “Do you love me, princess?”
I nod as best I can while he continues to grip my hair.
“Say it.”
“I love you.”
“I fucking love you too.” His hungry mouth devours mine and his erection pushes insistently against me. His grip tightens around me so I can barely breathe. In my mind I hear the clang of a gilded cage closing around me.
My phone buzzes in my pocket. Fuck. I know it’s Jacob. Again. I ignore it and continue to give my attention to the table of four guys who are ordering a round of drinks. It’s a Saturday night and I’m at work. I managed to avoid seeing Jacob last night and today because I told him I was too busy. I love him, I do. And he’s so good to me. But I just… I need to breathe. I just need some space.
Since he paid off my loan several weeks ago he has become even more desperate for my time.
“I told Sal and Dee I’d hang out with them tonight, Jacob.”
He folds his arms across his chest. “If you love me, I should be all you need.”
I shake this thought off and turn to the last guy at the table. “And for you?” He’s sitting directly to my right. I could feel his eyes on me as I was taking down his friends’ orders. Now that I am looking at him I can see that he’s stunning. Exotic. His olive skin is smooth across his wide jaw and taut cheekbones. His light brown eyes are almond shaped and turn up at the corners.
“An Ashahi, please.” His lush lips form a smile. “And your name.”
“I, um,” I grab at my nametag and hold it towards him.
His eyes scan my tag. “Well, I’m Adrian.”
I quickly scribble his order down as I try not to blush. I can feel his eyes on me as I walk away to get their order and when I return. I continue to feel his eyes on me as I stop at a table nearby to take more orders.
I hear a deep voice yelling over the background rock song and boozy buzz. “What the fuck are you doing? Get your God damn perverted eyes off my girl.”
What the…? I spin
around. Jacob? I can’t believe my eyes. Jacob is standing over Adrian. He is practically vibrating with rage. His goons are holding Adrian’s friends back.
Adrian has his hands lifted in surrender. “Cool it, man. I wasn’t doing anything.”
“The fuck you weren’t,” Jacob’s hands fist in Adrian’s shirt and yank him to his feet. “You fucking look at her again, you even fucking breathe in her direction and I will kick your fucking ass. Now get the fuck out of here and never come back.” Jacob pushes Adrian hard and he goes flying back into another table with a crash. Jacob stalks towards him looking like he’s ready to take another shot.
“Jacob, stop!” I drop my pad and pen as I run towards him and grab his arm. “What the hell are you doing?”
Jacob turns his furious eyes at me. “It’s for you, princess. I’m fucking protecting you.”
“I’m so sorry, princess. I’m so fucking sorry.” Jacob stands, eyes pained and glossy, at my dorm room door after I open it. I wouldn’t have opened it if he hadn’t kept banging and pleading for me to come out.
“I lost my job, Jacob.” I wrap my arms across my chest. I feel my skin break out in pins and needles to see him again. “Your sorry isn’t going to get it back.”
He falls to his knees and clutches at my legs. “Just tell me you forgive me, princess. I’ll fucking die if you don’t forgive me. I’ll die.” He looks up at me with red-rimmed eyes. I feel a flood of pity tug deep inside me. “Please, princess. Let me make it better. I’ll fucking die without you.”
Like an idiot I let him pull me down to my knees to him. His arms go around me. I sigh deeply and melt into him. Even though I am angry and confused, it still feels so good to be held by him. This is so wrong. Our love is turbulent and frantic and crazy and stupid and desperate. The energy buzzes deep under my skin. Highest of highs, lowest of lows. This is a roller coaster I’m not sure how to get off. But worse, I’m not sure if deep down I really want to.
