‘Don’t say a word.’ He held his hand up. ‘I’ve got things to say to you, and you’re going to listen if I have to beat it into your spoilt little hide!’
‘Shiloh, there’s no need for all thisâthis intensity,’ Danni began.
‘Intensity?’ He looked as though he’d have liked to hit her and she took a step backwards. ‘You know, you are one thoughtless, selfish little bitch!’
‘Now wait a minute. Nobody calls me that.’ She broke off as he advanced on her and she stepped back until her legs came up against the bunk.
‘No, you wait a minute. I was sitting with your father during your race and I watched his face. While you played Stirling Moss I saw him age twenty years. Do you know what you’re doing to him? You’re tearing him apart, and I think it’s about time someone put a stop to it.’
Danni’s face had paled. For all her anger his words were hitting home. Wasn’t he telling the truth? Wasn’t she causing her father the agony he described? Her eyes dropped to the floor. Of course she was. A hundred times she had refused to acknowledge the flashes of worry on his face.
‘I think the time has come for you to retire. And what better time than after such an amazing, showy performance? The fans will talk about it for years,’ Shiloh said sarcastically.
‘I’m not retiring, no matter what you say.’ Danni’s eyes flashed back. ‘I admit I drove a little recklessly today, but, well, I’m going to win the Driver to Europe Competition. I’m in the lead on points now.’ She looked at him defiantly.
‘You are giving up motor racing.’ His finger dug her shoulder as he emphasised each clipped word. ‘As of now. Besides, you’re going to be too busy in future, being my wife and a mother to our children.’
‘That’s the answer to everything as far as men are concerned, isn’t it? Keep the little woman barefoot and pregnant. Well, I won’t be dictated to by you or anyone else!’
Shiloh took one step forward and his thighs rested against hers. Blood pounded in her veins, her heartbeats skipping, as her traitorous body reacted to his touch, the sensations spreading like wildfire.
‘I mean every word I’ve said, Danni. And on top of it all I don’t think your father can take too much more of what you dished out today.’
‘Pop’s never said he wanted me to give up racing,’ she began, the movement of his thighs setting her aflame.
‘He shouldn’t have to tell you, you should be able to see it on his face. You would if you thought about someone else’s feelings instead of your own.’ He glanced at his wristwatch. ‘I have to go, I’m due on the track. We’ll talk about it later tonight. But you may as well let the officials know that you’re withdrawing from further competition.’
‘I am not withdrawing,’ she said firmly, ‘and that’s final.’
‘We’ll see about that. I’ll take care of it myself.’
‘Don’t you dare!’
‘And if I do?’ he drawled tauntingly, his eyes moving down to the agitated rise and fall of her breasts beneath the enveloping driving suit. His fingers took hold of the zipper and pulled downwards. His eyes had changed colour, burning with a different emotion, and Danni raised her hands to his chest to fend him off. But her fingers settled caressingly on the thin material of his T-shirt and his lips descended on to hers. His hand had dragged the zipper to her waist and moved caressingly over her breast when a knock on the door of the van broke the bond of mutual arousal that had sprung between them.
‘Shiloh? Danni? You in there?’ Jock’s voice called, and Shiloh reluctantly released her, pulling the opening of her suit back together and raising the zipper, smiling mockingly into her flushed face.
‘Coming, Jock.’ His eyes didn’t leave Danni’s face. ‘I think I’ve proved my point, don’t you?’ he said softly before he went to the door. ‘We’ll talk later.’
However, Danni didn’t stay to see Shiloh’s race. All at once she couldn’t bear to spend another moment at the race track. There were two vacant seats on an earlier flight, and when she told her father she intended to return home earlier than planned he decided to accompany her. Jock made no mention of Shiloh or the race as they winged their way northwards, and it wasn’t until they sat over a cup of tea in the house at Broadbeach that he put his hand over one of hers and waited for her to look at him.
‘Do you feel like talking about it, love?’
Danni had been holding it all inside and her father’s sympathy broke the wall of the dam. She dissolved into his arms, sobbing brokenheartedly. Bit by bit the whole story came out, Danni telling her father far more than she realised she was, right down to the moment she had seen Marla Damien in Shiloh’s arms.
‘Oh, Pop, I’m sorry about the race today. I don’t know why I drove like that. I must have given you a terrible time, but I was so upset and angry at everything.’
Jock looked down at her tear-filled eyes. ‘By everything I guess you mean Shiloh?’
‘Pop, he wants me to give up racing. In fact he ordered me to give it up, and I’m leading in points in the Driver to Europe Competition. You know how we always planned for me to be the first woman to take out the series.’
‘You’ll have to decide just how much it really, honestly means to you, which means the most to you, the competition, or Shiloh. Maybe to get a lot you’ll have to give up a little.’
‘But, Pop, no one’s asking Shiloh to make that kind of decision!’
‘Not that he realises, love, but during your race today, he suffered. Why do you think he was so angry? Maybe today he learned how hard it is to sit on the sidelines. Look, love, I don’t deny that Rourkey was the last person I would have chosen for you, but I didn’t realise until I saw his face as he watched you race just how much he cares for you,’ Jock told her.
‘Cares for me?’ Danni sniffed. ‘All he cares about is motor racing.’ Marla Damien’s face encroached on her memory, but she pushed it aside. ‘Why else would he go back to it after it had nearly killed him?’
Jock shrugged his shoulders. ‘Who knows? Didn’t you tell me he feels he has something to prove to himself?’
They fell silent for a moment.
‘How can you condone his racing after what happened to Rick, Pop?’ Danni asked quietly. ‘Especially when Shiloh was involved.’
Her father sighed heavily. ‘Danni, Rick’s death is something we have to learn to live with, and we owe it to Shiloh to put it behind us. When it happened I was angry, burning mad, and I wanted to blame someone for my hurt. I was open and waiting to believe someone had caused the accident when the rumours began, and I even believed it was Rourkey.’
‘But if he was to blameâ’ Danni broke in.
‘No, love, I know now he wasn’t,’ Jock said sadly. ‘I was talking to Chris Damien about it and he told me he’d seen an amateur movie of the race and it was a clear-cut blow-out of Don Christie’s front tyre that moved him against the back of Shiloh’s car. It was only a brilliant piece of driving on Shiloh’s part as he tried to pull himself out of it that kept him out of the collision that followed. He very nearly pulled it off, too, according to Chris.’
‘If that’s true then why didn’t Shiloh tell everyone about the movie?’ A pain clutched at Danni’s heart. ‘It would have cleared his name, stopped all the talk.’
‘Maybe he thought it was best left.’ Jock sighed. ‘There’s only pain in raking it all over. We know that, don’t we, love?’ He paused, frowning worriedly. ‘That’s been the trouble between the two of you?’ The question was almost a statement.
Danni sighed and shook her head, her mind and body exhausted. ‘Yes and no, Pop. We should never have got married. I made a mistake. Maybe I’m just not the marrying kind.’ She tried to lighten the conversation.
‘What do you mean, not the marrying kind? That’s utter nonsense and you know it,’ stated her father. ‘I think it’s time you sat down togethe
r and talked all this out. Marriage is an all or nothing thing, love. You can’t take it on and off like a coat.’ He patted her hand. ‘When Shiloh comes home tomorrow you talk it all out.’
But Shiloh didn’t come home next morning. Dallas arrived back with Danni’s car on Thursday, and it was from him that Danni learned that Shiloh had easily won his race at Sandown and had gone across to South Australia with Chris Damien to compete in an unscheduled race meeting to be held in Adelaide on the state’s public holiday the following Monday.
Danni’s heart sank to its lowest ebb, and by Sunday evening she thought she had never felt so lost and alone in her life. Her father had suggested she spend the weekend at Mallaroo, but she had declined, not wanting to have to pretend that everything was fine, that she didn’t care that Shiloh had not even taken the trouble to call to let her know where he was. Now she half wished she had gone out to the farm. Anything was better than sitting alone in this mood of cold despair.
When a car turned into the driveway at nine o’clock Danni closed her eyes, hoping it wasn’t Dallas. She couldn’t bear to talk about anything to do with motor racing tonight, and Dallas was the last person she could talk to about Shiloh. At least she had been sitting in the dark, so if she stayed quiet perhaps her visitor would think she was having an early night or had gone out somewhere.
She listened as footsteps mounted the stairs and then a key clicked in the lock and the door swung open. It must be her father. Standing up, she flicked on the standard lamp, throwing the living-room into soft light.
‘That you, Pop?’
There was no answer.
Something was dropped softly on to the hall carpet and then, as Danni stood transfixed, a tall figure appeared in the doorway.
Danni’s heart leapt into her mouth, and as she recognised the thin features it crossed her mind that she might have preferred an intruder. ‘You could have called out. You nearly frightened me to death!’ Her defences were up again while her heart cried out at his nearness.
He smiled crookedly. ‘That’s what I like, an affectionate welcome from my ever-loving wife,’ he remarked drily.
‘What kind of welcome can you expect when you don’t even let me know where you are?’ Danni snapped back at him. This wasn’t the way she had imagined his homecoming to be. It was all going so wrong. They just seemed to antagonise each other the moment they got together.
‘I see. I should let you know my every movement, but you can leave the track without a whisper. That sounds fair,’ he said sarcastically. ‘Maybe I thought you needed time to come to your senses,’ he added, tossing his keys on to the sideboard and walking across to pour himself a Scotch. ‘Anyway,’ he took a drink, ‘I was sure the redoubtable Dallas would fill you in on my activities as soon as he got here.’
‘He said you would be racing at Adelaide today and tomorrow.’
Shiloh emptied his glass in one gulp. ‘I was. But I changed my mind.’ He was looking down at his empty glass. ‘Would you believe I wanted to see you?’
All of Danni’s uncertainty and reaction to seeing him welled up inside her and she wanted him to feel some of the hurt she had suffered in the past week. ‘I take it the lovely Marla was otherwise engaged?’ Once the words were said Danni could feel horrified at her spitefulness, and only when Shiloh started angrily towards her did she retreat into her bedroom.
He was there before she could slam the door and he stood looking angrily at her. ‘Not so very long ago if a wife behaved like a shrew her husband gave her a good hiding.’
‘Oh, right. That will solve everything.’
He raised a sardonic eyebrow.
‘Shiloh, you wouldn’tâIf you come one step nearer I swear I’llâ’ Danni’s step backwards was halted by the bed.
‘You’ll what? For a librarian you’re surprisingly lost for words,’ he teased. ‘You’ll lay one on me, perhaps?’
‘I will.’ Danni’s breath was caught in her throat.
‘And is that a threat or a promise, hmm? I trust you mean you’ll lay a kiss on my lips.’ He stepped nearer.
‘Kiss, nothing!’ Danni exclaimed, feeling like a mouse being tormented by a cat. ‘I think you’d better get out of here before I scream the place down.’
‘Start screaming then!’ He laughed deep in his chest as his arms came around, pulling her tightly against him.
Danni tried to free her hands, wanting to put some distance between them. It was imperative that she did because she knew how his closeness eroded her defences. But his arms held her captive. She turned her lips from his kiss, only to have him tease her earlobe, so that not only did she have him to fight but her already surrendering defences.
‘Will you please let me go? I have no desire whatsoever to have you kiss me!’
‘It’s a wife’s duty to kiss her husband.’ His voice was all teasing arrogance.
‘I don’t want to be your wife. Iâ I want a divorce.’
‘Well, I don’t!’ He still held her in his arms, but his eyes held a wary expression.
‘And I know very well why you don’t, too,’ Danni burst out.
‘Quite the little know-all, aren’t you? No doubt you’re going to fill me in.’
‘I don’t want to stay married to someone who married me to set a few suspicious minds at rest. No one would think I’d marry you if you’d had anything to do with Rick’s death. What I don’t understand is why you didn’t simply publicise that home movie that Chris Damien supposedly has. It would have been less trouble,’ Danni finished, near to tears.
Shiloh shook his head. ‘For an intelligent girl you are incredibly dumb. How many times do I have to tell you I don’t care what people think, I only care about what I believe of myself. And what you think of me.’ He kissed her quickly on the lips. ‘Do I have to spell it out? I married you because I loved you and I don’t want to live without you. And I think you feel the same.’
He loved her? Danni couldn’t let that thought compute. ‘Well, I don’t!’ Danni said as firmly as she could, barely holding onto the reason for her protests. Didn’t love him? Didn’t feel the same way? Deep down she knew she did. So why was she protesting?
‘Then prove it!’ He was saying and he relaxed his grip on her, taking her by surprise, so that she stood in the loose circle of his arms.
‘Prove what?’ Danni stammered.
‘That you have no desire. You stated you had no desire to kiss me. Prove it by kissing me dispassionately,’ said Shiloh, looking down at her through half-closed eyes.
Danni could only look at him and he smiled crookedly before he lowered his head and his lips claimed hers, moving sensually, breaking down her resistance and fanning the spark of response that began as a flutter in the pit of her stomach and rose, threatening to have her lose her head completely. Her lips moved tentatively beneath his and reading her response, his lips teased hers, parting her lips, probing and demanding.
Danni’s head began to spin. How she wanted to believe what he said! If only she could forgetâ She had to break away now or she wouldn’t have the strength or desire to carry it out. Summoning her reserves, she went to straighten her arms, thrust him away, but he had read her mind as usual.
The bed behind the back of her knees upset her balance and she collapsed on to the soft mattress, gasping in shock. Shiloh’s body was beside hers, his legs across hers, his hard maleness searing through the thin material of her skirt.
His hand was now free to caress her and her body responded of its own volition. And suddenly she admitted to herself that she didn’t want to fight him. This was where she wanted him. She needed him, and only that had any importance. The rest meant nothing. Motor racing. Marla. There was only this unity, his hands playing over the soft skin of her midriff, over the lacy covering of her bra, cupping her breasts, and she murmured beneath his lips. She loved him so much.
; ‘Seems to me this is where we came in,’ he whispered as his fingers fumbled with the buttons on her blouse. ‘Why do women wear so many clothes?’ he muttered hoarsely.
Danni giggled and gave his shirt a tug, but it was caught fast in the belt of his jeans. ‘I could say the same about men,’ she said huskily.
They laughed together and he raised himself so that his shirt came loose in her hands. She moved her fingers over the firmness of his skin, and the smile died on her lips at the passion in his eyes. Sliding her hands under his shirt, she pulled him closer against her.
‘God, Danni, if you only knew what you do to me!’ he breathed against the hollow of her neck.
‘Show me,’ she whispered, and his lips claimed hers.
In the early hours of the morning Danni stirred sleepily, opening her eyes to find Shiloh looking down at her with a relaxed smile of satisfaction. The only light came from the living-room lamp which she had left burning.
She smiled and stretched languidly.
‘You look as if you’ve lost twenty cents and found two dollars, Mrs O’Rourke,’ he said happily.
She ran her hand lightly over his shoulder and her smile faded a little. ‘I love you, Shiloh,’ she said simply. ‘I have almost from the first.’
‘That goes for me, too, Danni.’ He caught her hand and pressed his lips to her palm. ‘Plain and simple, with no ulterior motives.’
‘I was so mixed up about everything, about that race, about Rick,’ Danni paused. ‘I didn’t want to believe you were responsible, butâ’
‘I know. I guess my attitude didn’t help.’ He sighed. ‘I felt so bad about Rick it ate away at me all those months I was laid up. It was part of the reason I went back to racing. Part guilt, and part conviction that I had lost my nerve. It was hinted to me so often I almost began to believe it.’ He looked into her eyes. ‘I knew myself that the accident was none of my doing, but I was too pigheaded to defend myself. I couldn’t see why I had to prove it to the world that I was innocent. It was a ghost I had to lay, I have laid.’
Race For Revenge (Lynsey Stevens Romance) Page 16
