I don’t need to go outside and pretend to look in my car for something on the small chance that he’ll see me and stop to chat. I am better than that. At least I can pretend to be better than that.
Elizabeth’s door opens and I jump, knocking my head into the window frame. My heart thumps in my chest as I watch them talking and once again, ridiculous thoughts of going outside to say hello fill my head. Instead of making a fool of myself, I anchor my feet to the floor and peek through the curtains, craning my neck to see down our shared porch.
Tyler runs a hand through his hair as Elizabeth tells him something. He shakes his head and gives her this pitying smile. He says something back to her and she laughs, playfully slapping him on the shoulder.
It feels so wrong to be peering into their personal lives, but I can’t freaking help myself. With one last gorgeous smile and some words of advice that make him lift his eyebrows really high, Tyler grabs Elizabeth around the waist and pulls her into a hug. My legs feel like jelly and all that water I drank during my workout rumbles around in my stomach. Elizabeth leans into him, nuzzling her pretty head right into the crook of his neck as he whispers something into her ear.
I swallow and step away from the window.
Looks like Elizabeth has moved on from her ex.
Good thing I wasn’t into Tyler.
Chapter 2
Our living room is a used baby item utopia. I shove aside a car seat with two plastic bases that snap into the bottom of it. One is supposed to stay in the backseat of my car. Or Miranda’s car, if and when she gets one. I’m still thinking I should find a cheap reliable car for her and maybe surprise her with it. She’s already six months along, and in a few months she’ll be way too pregnant to walk to the diner for work every day.
Miranda sits cross-legged in the middle of the floor, surrounded by piles of baby clothing, crib sheets and burp cloths. Marcus dropped off several trash bags of this stuff a few hours ago and Miranda’s been acting like a child on Christmas morning unpacking and sorting it all.
At six months pregnant, Miranda’s thin frame is starting to look really adorable with that ever-growing baby bump. I’m overjoyed for her day off work this week. Finally I won’t be alone at home and stuck inside my own head all day. Plus Elizabeth is working so I don’t have to worry about running into Tyler on her front porch again. Speaking of, he still hasn’t called me. Not that I am even thinking about that anymore.
“Do you think we have enough friends here to throw a baby shower?” I ask as I tie the tiny shoelaces on a pair of booties that are so tiny they barely fit over my thumbs.
“I wouldn’t even have enough friends at home for that,” she replies with a sarcastic snort that makes me feel like she’s not as apathetic to the topic as she’s pretending to be.
I’m trying to stay busy here, because staying busy means not having time to think about men. I start work on the Halloween Festival tomorrow, but I’m sure there’s still plenty of free time in my days to plan a baby shower. Even if it was just me, Miranda, Sherry and Elizabeth, it could still be fun.
My chest tightens when I think of Elizabeth. I wish I could hate her, but I can’t. She’s too nice and she hasn’t done anything to wrong me. Of course Tyler would like her…he’d be stupid not to.
And I was stupid for turning him down. If I had just smiled a little more, or said something a little sweeter—something that wasn’t a reminder to him that I don’t want to date—maybe I’d still have a chance. Because, as embarrassing as it is to admit it to myself, I do want to date. I want to be loved and I want someone to love. I’m just not sure if my fear of being hurt again will allow me to let down my walls.
“Oh my god, you’re thinking about Tyler again, aren’t you?” Miranda throws a tiny pair of denim overalls with basketballs as buttons at me, hitting me right in the face. It doesn’t hurt, but it jars me out of my daydream.
“No, I’m not.”
“Yes you are. God, Aunt Robin. Grow a pair of balls and go out with him already.”
“I’m pretty sure he likes Elizabeth.”
Miranda shakes her head. “He likes you.”
“You don’t know this.”
“Yes I do.” She’s so matter-of-fact I want to punch her in the face.
“What makes you think that? I told you how I saw him embracing Elizabeth right after her break up. That wasn’t just a friendly hug. That was an ‘I want to do you’ hug.”
She rolls her eyes and sorts piles of baby socks. “I see him like every day at the diner and he always asks about you. He doesn’t ask about Elizabeth. He barely even talks to her and she’s actually there most of the time.”
“Really?” I ask, followed quickly by, “Never mind. I don’t care.”
“Jesus, Aunt Robin, it’s like Stubborn is your middle name. No, it’s your first and middle name. I bet your social security number isn’t a number at all. It’s just S-T-U-B-B-O-R-N.”
Now I roll my eyes. “I guess I could text him.” I never did send that friendly text about the Halloween festival the other day. The text was typed and ready to go but after seeing them on the porch, I had deleted it. “But if he really liked me, like I thought he did, then he would be texting me.”
Miranda doesn’t have a smartass comeback for that. She lowers her head and focuses on the baby clothes in her lap. “I guess you have a point there. But maybe he’s just shy. He put himself out there and let you know how he felt. Now you should do the same.”
I take a deep breath and focus on the wood grain flooring. Deep down I know that it is stubborn to spend the rest of my life hating the idea of loving someone. I can’t stay away from the idea of dating forever. I mean, I thought I could, I maybe even wanted to, but deep down, in the part of me that refuses to stay buried, I know I don’t want to live my life alone.
Of course I can always ignore my deep down feelings and plan a baby shower until I figure out what I want. I stand up, slip into my flip flops and grab my purse. Miranda gives me a weird look. “I’m going to the store,” I announce, happy to be doing something instead of moping around.
“Which store? Because we need more of those forty-five calorie cheese slices.”
“The far away store.”
Miranda lifts an eyebrow. “You never want to go to the far away store.”
“I do now,” I say with a smile. “We need printable invitations, a printer, some plates and napkins and a cake decorating kit and those sparkly party decorations…” I count off items on my fingers and Miranda’s confused expression only gets more confused. “We don’t have enough people to have a baby shower, Aunt Robin.”
“Sure we do,” I say. “My nephew deserves a baby shower.” Miranda smiles, biting on her lower lip in the process. “You’re really nice to me, you know.”
I shake my head. “I’m just being an aunt. Are you coming or not?”
“Can I stay here instead? You can surprise me with the stuff you get?”
“Sure.” I swallow. Shopping away my anxiety and worries is always easier when I have someone with me. But I’m a big girl and I can handle it. “Do you need anything while I’m out?”
“Forty-five calorie cheese slices.”
I nod. “Got it.”
My mind tries to recall all the baby showers I’ve been to in my life and what kind of dumb games were played as I skip down the porch steps and head toward my car. I want this to be a fun party for Miranda, even if we don’t have many guests. When I brought up the idea of throwing a baby shower to Maggie a few nights ago, she immediately shot down the idea, cursed me a new one through text message, and told me that no teenage mother should be rewarded with gifts for getting knocked up out of wedlock.
So yeah, I guess I won’t be inviting her.
I fully support Miranda’s decision to keep her mom out of her life. I know there’s probably a ton of other people who would say we’re being awful and we should keep trying to win over Maggie and keep trying to bring the family together, but h
onestly, if I had been treated that way by my own mother I would have left, too. Maybe I’m just as bad as Miranda is. I don’t care.
The Chevy across the street doesn’t even catch my attention at first. I’m so wrapped up in my own thoughts that I don’t notice that Tyler is at the other set of duplexes. Shirtless. Wearing holey jeans that are a little too tight with black boxers just barely peeking out of the top of his waistband. It’s not until Marcus yells my name from the front porch of the other duplex that I look up and notice him and Tyler.
And God, do I notice Tyler.
He’s carrying a box of ceramic tile over his shoulder. The weight of the box makes his muscles taunt, stretching across his back and shoulders as he walks from the bed of the truck toward the porch and pack, unloading box after box. Movement catches my eye and I notice Marcus walking toward me with a smile on his face. “Hey there, stranger!”
I open my car door, toss my purse inside and then close it again. “Hey, Marcus. What’s up?”
“Want to come over?” he says, tossing his head back toward the other side of the street. “Say hi to Tyler?”
“No. What? Why?” Words tumble fast and stupidly out of my mouth and I finally find the sense to shut up. I shake my head. “I mean, um, tell him hi for me, okay? I’m kind of busy.”
Marcus shoves his hands in his jean pockets and gives me a look that’s almost exactly like Miranda’s when she’s calling me stubborn. “I think you should come say hi,” he repeats. He steps forward, wrapping his fingers around my elbow. “Come on.”
I don’t hold back or try to get out of his grasp because I totally, definitely, absolutely want to see Tyler. Call it exposure therapy or finding closure or something, but I need to see him. I have to break this weird silence that’s stretched on for the last week since I went on that stupid fake date with him. At least if he gives me the cold shoulder then I’ll know to give up and get over him.
I’m weirdly confident as I step across the road and onto the driveway of the other duplex. I walk straight and with a slight casual sway to my steps, like this isn’t a big deal and this isn’t anything to freak out about. Tyler walks out of the wide open front door, sees Marcus and I walking toward him and stops. Our eyes meet and all of that confidence I had slips out of my pores and evaporates into the air.
And then he smiles.
A cold wave of nausea floats around in my stomach but I think I smile back. God, he’s gorgeous. Why does he have to be shirtless?
Who am I kidding, I want him to stay shirtless. I want to burn every shirt he owns and forbid stores from selling him new clothing.
“Look who I found,” Marcus says with a heavy dose of arrogance and…snark? “I think I left my phone inside,” he adds, hopping up onto the porch and ducking past Tyler to get inside the house. But that was just a lie because his phone was in his back pocket. I could see the lump.
“Hey there,” Tyler says. He must realize that he still has work to do because he starts walking toward his truck again. I follow. “Hey. Marcus told me to come say hi.”
“That boy is weird.” Tyler heaves another box of tile over his shoulder. I reach for the next box, bending over the lowered tailgate and stretching for it. My hands wrap around the box, but when I pull, nothing happens. Tyler laughs. “Be careful. That’s heavy.”
I try again, this time moving the box a few inches toward me. But all the effort it takes makes my eyeballs feel like they’re going to burst out of my skull. “Guess I’m no help,” I say with a pathetic smile and a shrug. Tyler smiles back. “I don’t need help. The company is nice, though.”
“Oh yeah?” I say, following him back up the driveway and into the house. This duplex needs a lot of work. It still has shag carpeting. Green kitchen counter tiles and dark wooden wall paneling. Yuck.
He sets the box of tiles on the kitchen flooring and I don’t even stop myself from checking out his ass. “Yeah,” he says, standing back up.
“Well,” I say, stretching out the small talk because I have no idea what else to talk about. “I’m good at giving company. I could probably sit here and talk your ear off for the rest of the day.”
“Really?” Tyler folds his arms across his chest. His eyes are accusatory in a playful way.
“Why are you looking at me like that?”
He frowns. “You haven’t seemed like you wanted to give me company lately. That’s all.”
“How would you know what I seem like? You haven’t even come over to say hi.” There. I said it. I got it off my chest. And I only marginally sounded like a whining teenager.
Tyler stares at me. Okay, maybe I sounded a lot like a whining teenager? “Why are you looking at me like that? Can’t you just…I don’t know,” I say, putting my hands on my hips. “…look like a normal person?”
“You’re making this awkward,” he says. With that, he heads back out to get more tiles. I don’t follow him this time. I stand at the doorway and shout. “How exactly am I being awkward?”
“Talking about it actually makes it more awkward,” he says as he sets down another box. He stands, wiping his hands on his jeans. I do a very good job of pretending I don’t care about his bare chest that’s just a few feet away from me. “I tried hanging out with you,” he says. His finger extends out and pokes me in the stomach. I jump back. “How exactly did you try that?” I say, feeling some more confidence come up from out of nowhere. “I’ve been home pretty much all day every day. You never come over.”
“I tried to come over!” Tyler pokes me in the stomach again.
“How? Did you communicate with me telepathically or something?”
He lifts an eyebrow. “Are you serious? Are you seriously serious right now?”
I roll my eyes. “Duh.”
With a sigh, he grabs his cell phone from his jeans pocket. His thumb swipes across the screen. The thing looks so tiny in his hand, even though it’s a newer model with a massive screen. He holds the phone out to me. My number is at the top of the screen. It’s his call log. I take the phone and scroll down the screen.
“I don’t understand,” I say. A warm sensation floods through my body, making my toes tingle with realization of what he’s showing me. “You called me every day for the last week?”
He nods, looking smug as hell. “Look at my texts. I’ve practically made myself look like a pathetic loser in these last few days.”
I bite my lip and press the messages icon on his phone. The top most text is to Elizabeth. My heart falls to my stomach in one painful lump. I can only see one message without clicking on their chat log: Okay, cool. That doesn’t tell me anything about Tyler and Elizabeth’s relationship, or lack of one. And I can’t possibly click it in front of him. I click on the chat lot with my name instead.
He sent me a text six days ago. Hey there. They’re showing a movie on an inflatable screen at the library tonight. Want to watch it with me?
One day later: Miranda said you need a truck to buy some furniture. Let me know if you’d like to use mine. I’ll drive though. You’re a sucky driver.
Yesterday: Dinner? At the diner? Don’t make me eat alone! Followed by: Come on now, your signal can’t possibly be that bad. I think someone’s ignoring me.
Today: I’ll be working on the other duplexes today. Let me know if there’s anything else you need me to fix while I’m there.
“Wow.” I let out the breath I’d been holding and, with a shaking hand, give him back his phone. “I didn’t get any of those. I thought you’ve been ignoring me.”
Tyler pockets the phone. His voice is softer than usual. “I didn’t get any texts from you either.”
My cheeks flush. “I didn’t send any…” I look away. He pokes me in the stomach again. “Why the hell not? I thought we had a fun time. I wanted to see you some more. Even if it has to be as friends only.” He makes air quotes with the last two words. Everything inside of me turns to mush. Even my bones. Mush. All of it.
I draw in a breath and try to force t
he big, goofy grin off my face. Marcus comes barreling in the back door, slamming it closed behind him. “Holy shit there’s a crazy wasp out there. I barely got away.” His hand grabs his chest and he leans against the back door. “I’m allergic to that shit and there is no money for hospital bills right now.” We’re all silent for a second and then Marcus holds up his finger, squinting his eyes. “Wait a minute…you guys were in a moment, huh?” He laughs and holds up his hands in surrender. “I’m out of here. Is Miranda home?” I nod and he rushes toward the open front door. “See you lovebirds later!” he says right before breaking into a run, which is probably a smart idea because I kind of want to kill him for saying that.
Tyler pokes me again in the stomach. “We need to get you a new cell phone. Something with better service in the area.”
I roll my eyes, but he’s right. “I’m about to go shopping so I might actually do that. Plus I want to get Miranda a phone since her mom shut off her service.”
“Where else are you going?” he asks. When his finger moves to poke me again, I’m expecting it. I grab his finger and stop it just inches from touching me. Tyler’s smile turns cocky. He pokes me with his other finger and I grab for it, but miss. He’s too quick. He spins his hand around and twists out of my grip. Then he attacks me. Finger pokes come at me from both sides, each one landing right on my stomach, my side, my ribcage. I try to knock his hand away but I’m laughing so much I’m pretty much useless in the self-defense department.
“Quittttt,” I say through gasps and giggles. I grab his wrist and hold on tightly. He pulls his hand around my body, taking me with him. I spin around against my will and soon I’m pressed against his chest, his arm pinning my arm across my stomach. I wriggle and squirm but it only brings us closer. “You’re a…big…jerk…” I say between laughs and struggles to break free. When I’m sufficiently worn out, I sigh deeply and relax, giving up. My back is pressed against his stomach and I let my shoulders sag, leaning my head against his chest. Tyler has my arms pinned across my stomach like a strait-jacket.
The Fate Series Box Set (Robin and Tyler Book 4) Page 16
