Josh waved at them, his smile widening. The little girls giggled and waved back.
“Hm.” I pointed the remote control at the stereo on the corner shelf and restarted the song. “Again, girls.”
They made “aww” sounds, like they too wanted to talk to Josh. I gave them what they knew was a pretend glare and they giggled some more before they started dancing again.
I walked to Josh and halted beside him. “What are you doing here?” I kept my voice low, so I wouldn’t disturb the girls.
He shrugged. “Norah mentioned you taught ballet here since you were like fourteen. And—” He ran a hand over his messy, dark hair. “—I was on my way to the company when I realized this studio was on my way, so, I don’t know, I just stopped by.”
I tilted my head and narrowed my eyes at him. What the hell was he doing? Okay, I got that he wanted to clear the awkwardness between us and I thought that was great. Taking him to the food alley and then going with him to see the crew rehearsing was already too good. But now … now I was wondering where we should draw the line.
“What?” he asked.
I opened my mouth to tell him what I thought, but one of the girls walked up to us and tugged on my skirt. “Miss Monroe, we’re done.”
“Oh.” I glanced toward them. The song continued playing, but they all looked at me expectantly, as if they had finished their dance several minutes ago and were waiting for more instructions.
“I’ve got this,” Josh said, taking off his shoes.
“What are you doing?”
He strolled in the classroom. “Just restart the song.” When I didn’t move, he looked at me as if he would bat his lashes and pout. “Come on.”
A little skeptical, I restarted the song and Josh stood in the center of the classroom with the girls, much like Sienna had done almost two months ago.
The girls stared at him, but once Josh started dancing, the girls all smiled and giggled and joined him. A practiced dancer, Josh had gotten the easy eight moves just by looking at the sequence once. As the music continued to play, Josh moved to the side and caught hold of Allison, and threw her up, pretending to be on a pas de deux with her. Then he moved on to Maddie and Maria, and on he went, until he had danced with all the little girls—and made them laugh and love dancing a little more.
When the class ended at nine, the girls didn’t want to leave. Josh had to promise them that he would be back soon, and only then the girls allowed their parents to take them home.
Josh waited by my side while I traded my ballet skirt for a real skirt, and my ballet slippers for flat shoes. Last, I put on a loose vest over my leotard.
“That was fun,” he said as we walked out of the little dance studio.
My heart expanded at the sincere tone on his voice. I was glad he had enjoyed making those girls’ day.
“It was,” I agreed. “They loved it. Thank you.”
He glanced at me, smiling. “My pleasure.”
***
Josh
The week went by too fast.
During our Friday rehearsal, Rayna and I had quite the audience. Besides Madam Petrov and our pianist, we had the company of Devin McCauley, Karen Monroe, Paulina Ferrera, Alberto Dolle, and some other members of the executive board.
As they entered the studio and settled on the folding chairs, I could see Rayna was a live wire, ready to sizzle out with nerves. I walked up to her and reached over to take her hands in mine, then decided it was best if I didn’t.
“Hey, Ray,” I said, forcing her to look at me. Her hazel eyes were wide and her neck was strained. “It’s just you and me, okay? Forgot them. It’s just you and me and the dance.”
She nodded and whispered, “Just you and me.”
“Yes, you and me. We can do this. We’re going to wow them. Right?”
“Right,” she said, but she didn’t like too sure.
This time, I did reach over and caught her hand in mine. “Hey, I’m serious. I’m here for you. We can do this.” I squeezed her hand.
Her eyes fell to our clasped hands and she squeezed my hand back. Then she lifted her gaze to me—much more focused. “We can do this.”
With a small smile, I left her in her corner, while I hurried across the room to my starting position.
The piano rang out and I began dancing, going to Rayna and her pretend balcony. And then we danced.
At the end, we were breathing hard, both from the dance and from the moment we had just shared. Once more, Rayna had been able to let go and had given her soul to the dance. It was perfect.
And the kiss … she almost let me kiss her like I wanted to. Almost.
Well, truth be told, the way I wanted to kiss her wouldn’t be appropriate for the dance. Or for an audience of any kind.
That realization sliced through me like a knife.
I mean, I wasn’t stupid. I knew my body still desired her and I often thought about how it would be to finish it. But it was another thing to realize I was attracted to Rayna on more than just a physical level.
“I told you they were great,” Madam Petrov said, looking at Devin McCauley.
The executive director stood and smiled at us. “I think Madam Petrov is right. You two are ready for the competition next weekend.”
The others took turns congratulating us and wishing us luck at the competition—it was great to have two of the best dancers in the company tell us we were amazing. All with the exception of Rayna’s mother.
She kept to herself at the back of the crowd, watching us with predatory eyes.
***
Rayna
Our audience left before our rehearsal time was up, but Madam Petrov let us go soon after. And when Josh invited me to dinner, I should have said no, but the word didn’t come out.
So, after changing into normal clothes, I followed him out and we strolled through the street side by side.
After a few silent seconds, he stuffed his hands into his pockets and glanced at me. “So sounds like we’re ready for the competition.”
I smiled at him. “I guess we are. But we still have one more week of rehearsals before we go.” I swallowed. In one week, Josh and I would be leaving for Chicago. Alone. Just the two of us.
Why did that suddenly sound like a very, very bad idea?
“You know, I noticed your mother didn’t seem enthusiastic about our performance.”
I almost tripped on my feet. “W-why do you say that?” I tried covering the quiver in my tone, but there was no way to fix it. Or my almost kissing the sidewalk. He lifted an eyebrow at me and I sighed. “She’s strict about ballet, you know? She wants me to be all I can be and she pushes me hard. I guess it’s her way of helping me, or showing me she cares about me.” I shrugged, pretending my words didn’t sound so weird, even to me. “Ever heard of tough love?” I tried chuckling, but it died on my lips before even starting.
Josh watched me with narrowed eyes. “So, she thinks that our display back there wasn’t good enough? It was fantastic; you heard the others. Besides, I felt it. You were great, better than ever.”
My cheeks warmed and I averted my gaze. “Thanks,” I whispered. “I guess that, as a mother, she’ll always expect more of me.”
“Like what?” he asked. “That in the two months we have been with the company, you will make it to principal dancer?” I noticed the tone of his voice hardening, and the volume becoming higher. He was angry for me.
The truth was, I had been dancing since I was three years old. Or one, actually, if I counted the private lessons my mother had given me every day in our own home. If she’d had her way, I’d have joined the company at fifteen, like Paulina Ferrera, and been well on my way to becoming a principal dancer. In her eyes, I was late. I had screwed up and now I had to dance, dance, dance to make up for the lost time.
“It’s more complicated than that.”
He halted, grabbing my arm. “That’s not—”
“Rayna!”
I froze. In slow motion, I turned to where m
y name had been called and saw my mother hurrying toward me.
“Shit,” Josh muttered, letting go of my arm.
“There you are,” my mother said, her voice dripping venomous sugar. What was she up to? Ignoring Josh, she stared at me with a wide smile. “Have you forgotten our dinner plans? We have reservations at the Trio Bistro at six thirty. We need to go before we lose it.”
I frowned. “Tonight? I thought it was Sunday night.”
She let out a loud laugh. “You’re mistaken, dear. It’s tonight.” She took my hands in hers and tugged. “We should be going.”
Josh stood like a concrete pillar. Stiff, with his arms crossed, and a big knot between his brows.
“Sorry,” I mouthed as I went with my mother.
He didn’t say anything as she pulled me through the crowded New York City streets, without acknowledging him. He didn’t even move as we turned a corner.
Then I snapped awake. “What was that?” I asked, pulling my hand free of hers. “Our dinner plan is for Sunday.”
She didn’t look at me as she said, “No, it’s for tonight, and I’ll prove it to you once we get to the restaurant and the hostess complains that we are late.”
“Then you changed it. Why?”
She shot me a plastic smile. “You’re mistaken, dear. Now let’s go. After dinner, we have to practice and if we’re late for that, you’ll go late to bed.”
I sighed.
It was going to be a long night.
Chapter Eleven
Josh
Rayna and I walked into the theater in tense silence. Actually, the last few hours had been filled with nothing but tense silence.
Last night, we met at the company, took a cab to the airport, boarded our flight, took our seats, and barely talked for the two hours we were in the air. When we arrived in Chicago, we got a cab to the hotel, checked in, bade each other goodnight, and went to our separate rooms. It had been hard to sleep knowing she was a wall away from me. In the morning, we met in the hotel’s dining room where we had a hearty breakfast, then headed out to the theater, which was only three blocks from the hotel. All in fucking tense silence. I didn’t know if it was from being nervous … or what? What else could it be?
Holding tight to her tote’s straps, Rayna inhaled sharply. “This looks so much bigger now.”
I scanned the area. It was packed with dancers and teachers and industry professionals—everyone looking ready to kill it out there.
“It probably is bigger now, but it doesn’t change the fact that we’re ready.” I brushed my fingertips on her arm and beckoned her to follow me. “Come on.”
We snaked through the crowd until we were at the check-in desk. We waited in line for a few minutes, checked in, received our numbers, and were sent backstage, where, as the lady who was helping said, we would find the dressing rooms.
The competition would last two entire days from early morning to late night. Classical ballet started this morning, and tomorrow there was also contemporary ballet. Then, on the night of the second day, the winners would be called on stage and presented with their awards.
Rayna and I went to the backstage area through double doors into what looked like a big ballroom of sorts where dancers were warming up for their performances. After finding the dressing rooms, Rayna and I took our time changing into our dance outfits—not our performance clothes yet, just something that would allow us to warm up until the couples category was called.
We warmed up and danced in a corner of the room, still in tense silence. Like me, Rayna scanned the place, taking in the other dancers, measuring them, analyzing them, trying to find out if they were better than us.
Time crawled. It was past noon when we were finally called.
Rayna and I changed into our costumes and met backstage. From where we stood, we could see a little of the dancer currently on stage. He was a lean guy with long legs who jumped really high. He probably cleared my head on his most prosaic jump.
After the guy left the stage, the couples category was announced. The first couple was performing the Don Quixote pas-de-deux. The next couple went for the Swan Lake pas-de-deux and the third performed the Blue Bird pas-de-deux. Then there was another Swan Lake, and a La Bayadere. We also saw Le Corsaire and Sylvia.
Finally, it was our turn.
I took Rayna’s hand and clasped it in both of mine, making her turn to me. “Forget about them. Forget about everyone else. This is just you and me, remember?” I tried to show her with my eyes, with my voice, that I really meant it. It was just the two of us.
She smiled at me. “Just you and me.” Despite the nervousness in her voice, she was focused, alert, and ready.
Without really thinking, I lifted her hand to my lips and kissed her palm. She inhaled deeply.
“Fifteen seconds,” someone called.
I let Rayna go and rushed to the other side of the stage—behind the back curtains—to where I would enter.
Then our song started, and Rayna and I danced.
The moment we entered the stage, Rayna transformed. She wasn’t the usually shy, blushing but bold girl I was attracted to. No, she was Juliet. A shy, blushing maiden, who danced her heart out.
There was no audience, no judges. There was only Rayna and me. Juliet and Romeo.
I smiled at her throughout the entire dance, feeling so energized, so content to be sharing this moment, this poignant, life-changing moment with her. And from the way she smiled at me, the way she held my hand and let me caress her, and let me kiss her—really kiss her—I knew she felt the same.
The last kiss came too quick and it was hard to let go of Rayna’s lips at the right time. Then, she ran to the back of the stage, as if she had gone up the staircase and watched me from the balcony, enchanting me with a dazzling smile.
Rayna dazzled me.
The music ended and thunderous applause echoed through the stage. Still smiling, Rayna joined me in the center of the stage, where I took her hand in mine—firmly, securely.
Together, we bowed to the judges and to the audience and left the stage.
***
Rayna
Josh and I stayed to watch the other competitors until all the couples were done, and then we ran out of the theater laughing.
After our near perfect performance, I felt like I was on a high and I needed to ride it. Like me, Josh also looked intoxicated by how well we’d done.
“I think we won,” he said, as we strolled down a street.
I scrunched my nose. “Not sure if we won, but we might have stayed in the top five.”
“Out of how many? Five?”
I laughed. “No! You saw there were more. I counted at least twenty.”
He nodded. “There were a lot of couples.”
“Yeah. It’ll be great if we stay in the top five.”
“Top three.”
I laughed again. “Okay, top three.”
We walked by what looked like a little rustic pub and Josh stopped. “Come on, we need to celebrate.”
I bit my lip, remembering what had happened the last time I drank—I had ended up in bed with Josh and he had left me half-naked and alone.
My mood took a sharp downturn. I shook my head and continued walking.
Josh threw himself in my way. “What’s the matter?”
“Nothing,” I said too quickly. I started walking around him, but Josh captured my arm and made me turn to him. “Hey,” I complained half-heartedly.
“I thought we were becoming friends here,” he said, his bright blue eyes intent on mine. “We were just having a good time and now you’re like that.” He pointed to my face. “Something happened. What is it?”
I forced a smile. “Nothing, really. The day was just pure adrenaline. It’s wearing off and I’m getting tired. I should go to the hotel and sleep.”
“But it’s only four in the afternoon.”
“One more reason not to go in there.” I jerked my chin to the pub. “It’s way too early to drink
.”
I gently pulled my arm free and walked back to the hotel, where I took a cold shower, and went straight to bed.
***
Josh
I didn’t go into the pub after Rayna left.
I had no idea what had happened and why her mood had changed so drastically. Finally, we were having an actual carefree time together, and then she shut down, leaving me alone to wrack my brain and try to piece together what the hell I had done wrong.
Because when a woman said nothing in that tone, it wasn’t nothing, and it was always the guy’s fault. But what had I done this time?
I walked around the area for over two hours, until the will to run to Rayna’s room and shake her until she told me what was wrong faded. When it was safe for me to go back to the hotel, I planned to take a cold shower and invite her out for dinner—just because we needed to eat. Then my cell phone rang.
I fished it from my pocket and groaned when I saw the name blinking on the screen.
“Hi, Mom,” I said, trying to sound chirpier.
“Hi, dear, how is it going?”
“I’m great. Good timing,” I lied. “I was just thinking about taking a break from the project I’m working on.”
“Oh, what are you working on this time?”
I froze. Shit. “It’s a planning piece for one of my classes in economics.” Damn, I hoped that sounded convincing.
“That sounds like fun. I bet your father would have loved helping you out with that.”
“Yeah, he would have loved it.” I bit back a groan. Fuck, this lying thing was getting old.
“How is college life? Are you liking it? You aren’t going to too many parties, are you?” I could see the frown over her blue eyes. “It wasn’t like that during my time. At least I don’t think it was.” Unlike my father, my mother had never gone to college. “Anyway, are you happy?”
Was I happy? I was, very much so, though I hated that she didn’t know the truth about why.
“I am, Mom, very happy.”
“Good. I’m glad. I guess I was just worried because you haven’t sent any more pictures lately.”
Dazzle Me (When You Dance Book 1) Page 9
