by E. A. James
He towered over me and then he placed himself between my legs and finished what he'd started with his mouth. I should have been nervous about where I was, the fact that he'd told me things that were impossible. I should have felt awkward, doing something so inappropriate in a hospital. I should have felt a lot of things. Instead, I just felt ecstasy. I let it consume me until it washed through every inch of my being. And then it was over and Mick was zipping up his fancy pants again. He handed me the gown and I pulled it on.
My fingers were still shaking.
"Where are you going?" I asked when it became apparent he wasn't going to get on the bed and cuddle with me. We always cuddled. I wanted to feel his body against mine.
"I have to take care of a couple of things, but I'll be back. In the meantime, you have to recover so that I can do that again, but harder” he said with a grin.
I shivered. The door swished open again and Mick was gone. I stayed behind in the white hospital room, feeling empty and forgotten. This was why I didn't want to have quickie sex with Mick. This was why we'd always cuddled. It was another part of him that didn't fit his bad ass I-don't-care image.
The nurse reappeared. She looked as dull and unfeeling as before.
"You can get dressed now and move to the mess hall. Your clothes are over there."
She pointed at a pile of clothes on a chair in the corner that I hadn't seen before. She walked out again. The mess hall? What? Where the hell was I?
CHAPTER FOUR
I got dressed. The moment I stepped through the sliding doors that led to the room I'd been kept in I realized I wasn't in the hospital in Fredericksburg as I thought I was. There were signs on the walls pointing to different places and I followed them until I reached the mess hall.
The hall was a large oval-shaped chamber, the corners all tilted up and meeting with the ceiling that tilted down. I stood inside a giant egg. The one side of it was occupied but a buffet-like table and people standing in a queue like this was normal for them. Let's all have lunch inside the giant egg.
I stood in the queue. Every now and then one of them glanced at me. I realized I looked different than they did. They were all tall and very slim, easily a head or more taller than I was. They wore suits the same as Mick's minus the coat in different colors and they looked... well, they looked like my family would approve of them. I felt short and fat and very much like I didn't fit in. What a way to boost a girl's self-esteem.
I sat down at an empty table and looked at the plate I'd been handed. A pile of veggies that didn't look familiar skirted a piece of meat the size of my face. I poked at it. It was rare enough that it might still be alive. A small pile of white little balls reminded me of rice, except rice didn't look like that. I eyed the food and wondered if it was safer to stay without. Everything here just seemed a little off. The people, the food, the hall...
An alarm started whining and red lights flashed. I dropped my fork and looked around.
Everyone froze until the alarm stopped, and then there was chaos. Trays were dumped wherever there was a space. The diners all ran out wide doors that slid the same way my hospital room door did. I walked toward the door. People bumped me, trying to get past.
Mick pushed through the crowd against the stream and when he spotted me he looked relieved.
"You have to go with them." He pointed to the people filing out of the hall like they'd been practicing this drill. "Stay with them, stay safe."
Fear clutched at my throat and threatened to strangle me. He wanted me to stay with the people that looked at me like I was the underdog? Did he know what it was like being the one everyone picked on? Obviously not. I mean, look at him.
"What's going on? Can't I come with you?"
Mick shook his head. "You can't, it's not safe. It's war out there."
He turned around and jogged away without looking back. War? What was he talking about? Surely I would know if there was war in Virginia. I looked after the men and women filtering into small bunker-like rooms. I looked for Mick. There was no way I was getting locked in with those people. I didn't know them, I didn't know where I was. I set off at a run after Mick.
I lost sight of him in a maze of tunnels and a moment later I was dreadfully lost. The alarms started up again and I freaked out. I felt like a mouse in a maze.
A cold draft wafted toward me and I followed it. Wind meant an exit. It turned three corners and then I found a door the size of a hanger door wide open with a ramp down. I walked toward it and looked out. Virginia lay stretched out before me, wet - like it had just rained - and green. But there was no peace.
Horrible looking creatures were on the ground, milling around, making sounds that I'd never heard before. It sounded like a cross between the guttural snort of a pig and the squeal of a monkey. At the bottom of the ramp, there were men and women in a square formation and I spotted Mick at the front.
He was right. This was war. And he was on the front lines.
It was impossible to digest. I covered my mouth with my hands and watched as they marched into the fray.
The moment the two groups met all hell broke loose. War began with a thundering ruckus. They fought each other with weapons I'd never seen before, and for a moment it looked like the strange creatures were winning.
I heard a scream and turned my head. A woman with a long braid down her back screamed, followed by a popping sound. Light burst in a blinding wave, and then there was a dragon where this woman had been. I couldn't breathe.
The dragon's scales were a golden yellow and it had black stripes on its back. Its eyes were a deep black and it made a rumbling sound. A moment later fire sprayed from its mouth.
Shit.
I looked for Mick. Did he know there was a dragon? I spotted him going hand to hand with one of those monsters. He was pinned down. The monster snapped at his face and I was sure I was going to watch him die. A rock formed in my stomach and started dragging down and I thought I was going to throw up.
Again I heard a pop and then Mick exploded in a bright flash of light. I didn't close my eyes or shield myself from the light, this time. I kept my eyes glued to Mick - fried retinas be damned. He grew and bulged, so fast it was almost impossible to follow. His skin gave way to scales the color of sand and bark and his eyes turned to mercury. A dragon suddenly stood in his place with eyes the color of steel and scales that reminded me of Mick's hair.
Mick was a dragon. All the talk about humans, them, not us. The way he'd said it. Mick was one of them. He wasn't one of us. Mick was an alien.
The thought knocked me breathless and I bent over heaving. Someone suddenly had their hands on my shoulders and I flung my arms wildly, trying to get away.
"Calm down, calm down!"
It wasn't a guttural squeal but a voice that spoke words. When I looked around a man stood next to me, hands up in defense.
"It's okay. I just want you to come with me so we can get you to a safe place. Mimic ordered us to keep you safe."
"Who?"
"Mimic." He shook his head. His hair was long and flopped into his eyes. He was dressed in the same clothes as everyone else. "Mick. I mean Mick."
Mimic was his real name? I looked back at the dragon who was incinerating monsters as far as he went. Well, the lie would be complete then, wouldn't it?
"Will you come with me?"
"Who are you?" I asked. "Where am I?" Nothing made sense anymore.
"You're on our ship. We're fighting and when we win, which we will, we'll evacuate Earth."
I blinked. Evacuate earth? Ship?
"And I'm Miath. I'm in Mimic's squadron."
Mimic. It didn't sound right. it didn't make sense. I didn't know what was going on. Miath turned and I followed him because I didn't know what else to do. Everything was upside down, everything I'd thought to be true was a lie.
Miath took me to a chamber similar to the others, but this one was empty. He let me walk in first and then explained to me how to lock the door from the inside
.
"You'll be safe here. Mimic will fetch you when it's safe."
I wanted to ask him questions. A million of them. But he didn't have the answers. He shook his head and the door closed as if he'd willed it so. I stood alone in the bunker, staring at the door that looked like all the walls, and felt like the rug had been ripped out from underneath me.
Mick was a dragon. An alien. Not Mick, Mimic. Nothing he'd been was true. Nothing he'd shown me was really him. What had he been doing? What had he been playing at by dragging me along for the ride?
I should have known something was up. I should have realized that it wasn't real. That machine in his bath tub was some kind of radar, maybe, but I should have wondered why it was in his bath and not at a place like Area 51. He'd been evasive about everything. So much that he'd said and done looked so different now in light of this. What was I supposed to do?
I sat down on the bench against the back wall and dropped my head into my hands. My life had been a mess. I wasn't what anyone wanted. I was a disappointment to my family. I was stuck in a dead-end job in a dead-end town in a dead-end life.
And Mick? Turned out when someone seemed too good to be true, they really were. I felt betrayed. How much had he been hiding from me? Was anything he'd said to me true? He'd made me feel like there was hope for someone like me, that there was somewhere I belonged even though my life proved different. And I was so hard up for acceptance that I'd fallen for it all without questioning it.
At least he wasn't cheating on me. I laughed at myself, aware that I sounded crazy. I'd thought there was another woman. That wasn't the case, but everything else was so much worse I almost wished it was something that simple. Of course, I didn't wish he had someone else - I think I would have died of mortification and rejection.
But how was this any different? Evacuate the earth, that guy had said. What was his name... Miath. What did that mean? Did that mean they were all leaving? Were they taking all the humans with them? Were the monsters - aliens - staying behind? So many questions and I literally didn't have a single answer.
I didn't know how long I sat in the bunker. I could open the door myself, Miath had shown me how, but I didn't want to. Where would I go? Outside where I didn't know the ship - an alien spaceship - or outside where my boyfriend was a dragon? I had the horrible feeling that I didn't belong.
When what felt like hours had passed the door opened. I hadn't done anything and I jumped when it did, but then Mick stood in front of the open door. His eyes were silver, still, the color of war. He had blood on his cheek, down his neck, but he looked upright and fierce and he wore that same suit again. His shifter suit?
"It's over." He sounded tired but he stayed upright. He was a soldier, I realized. In his battle clothing he wasn't the laid-back biker guy I knew, but a solid warrior. "Come on, you can come out now."
I took a step or two forward, but the honest truth was I was scared. Scared of Mick - Mimic - and who he was now. Scared of what my life was going to be like now. Scared of the unknown which suddenly seemed overwhelming, suffocating, terrifying.
"Where are we going?" I asked.
"I'm taking you home."
CHAPTER FIVE
Home. Mick was taking me home. I felt like I was being sent to bed early when the adults still got to stay up and enjoy the party. I felt like I was being sent away because I couldn't handle it.
Mick and I walked in silence. We cut through a bunch of trees that was too small to be called a forest but too dense to be gotten rid of by anyone who wanted to use the lands. I had the feeling he'd led us in there in case there were more of those red creatures left and he needed to fight. Give the human a space to hide, will you?
"I don't understand." Mick was a step or two ahead of me, his legs longer and his fitness better than mine. I was heaving. He looked calm and relaxed like he hadn't just fought a battle. He didn't answer me.
"Why are you taking me back? What's happening now?" I had the feeling he was leaving. I had the feeling everything I'd been living for since I'd met him was about to be ripped away from me and I was going to be left behind. Alone.
When we cleared the trees Redwall lay in front of us, a small town, sleepy in the dusk ready to tuck in for the night. The sun had set while we were in the trees and we hadn't seen the splashes of color left in its wake. Everything was silvery gray now, the color absent after a long day, and I suddenly missed it. Maybe it would all have felt different if it wasn't so late if there was stills sunshine. If none of this were true.
When we walked through the narrow streets to my home it felt like I was stepping out of some story back into reality. Everything seemed surreal now. When I was in the thick of it, it had seemed possible. Now it all felt like a dream. We reached my home and I unlocked the door. I didn't walk in. Instead, I turned to Mick. He looked tall and grave, standing on my porch.
"Miath, that friend of yours, he said that you're evacuating earth after the war."
Mick nodded. "We are."
"What does that mean?"
He looked to the side like there would be something interesting there, avoiding eye contact.
"We were here because we needed resources. Our planet is depleted, flattened by war, stripped bare by hopelessness and despair. This battle was the final wave in a series of wars that have carried on much longer than the existence of civilization like here on earth. We can finally return home and rebuild."
"We?" I swallowed. That meant he was leaving. "I don't want you to go."
He sighed. "I started dating you because it was natural for a man like me to be with a woman. I didn't want to stand out and the only way I could fit in was to do what the humans do."
I blinked at him. To do what the humans do? Something inside me cracked a little, a sign that breakage would follow.
"So... none of this was real for you?"
"I didn't say that."
"You're not denying it, either."
He hesitated for a moment. Then he shrugged. "Angie, baby, I can't explain this to you in a way you'll understand. You're still young, you've only been around three decades. Not even. I've been around so long... we're not the same."
I wanted to cry. Tears stung my eyes and I tried to swallow down the lump in my throat.
"Age doesn't matter. It doesn't We've been fine together and it didn't matter, did it?"
"Please don't do this, Ang. Don't make this harder than it needs to be."
My panic turned to anger.
"I'm making this hard, am I? Well, fine. If that's how you want to play this game I can play too. Fine. Go on, live your life on your godforsaken planet. Leave me behind. I'll be fine. Us humans know how to bounce back after someone rips our heart out and steps on it."
He opened his mouth to say something but the anger was mixing with shock after everything that happened and it came out in a toxic cocktail of rage and hysteria.
"I don't want to hear it. Since day one you've charmed me out of my panties and I fell for it. I'm glad your little camouflage trick worked. You're done now, so go."
He looked like he wanted to say something, but then he shook his head and turned. He walked down the three steps and down the little pathway.
Look back, I willed, but he didn't. Instead, he just kept walking.
Dammit. I walked into my house and slammed the door so hard everything shuddered. I didn't need him. I'd lived my life for a long time without him. Fine, so the last couple of months with him had been fantastic. I'd thought I'd found The One. It turned out he'd been making a fool of me and I'd fallen for it. But, of course, things like that always happened to people like me. Happily Ever After only happened to people who looked good and had their lives in check. Or those beautiful skinny girls that needed Prince Charming. I was neither.
I leaned against the door and closed my eyes. The truth was the only thing I wanted was for me to wake up and realize it was all just a bad dream, that Mick was at his cabin and I was going to go see him after work. I wanted it al
l to go back to normal. I wanted my life the way it was. It was unfair that it had been ripped away.
It took me half an hour to calm down. Thirty minutes and I was over my anger. I wanted to kiss and make up, but that wasn't possible. Not now that he was an alien on his space ship, leaving. I wanted to go to him and apologize for snapping.
The truth was I'd been hurt and it was easier to be angry than to cry. But he was going.
It took me another half an hour to realize that I wanted to go with him. Why the hell was I still here? What did I have to lose? I would be leaving behind a family that might not know I was gone, or if they did they would be relieved. I had a job I could do without, and they could do without me, and I had no real friends I would be leaving behind.
