by Nicole Marsh
“What a bummer,” Katie exclaims, watching me hold my tube with disappointment in her eyes.
One of the guys from the back, Alex, shouts, “What do we do now?”
Collin eyes me for a second, then shrugs. “We retie the tubes, then McKenzie can lay across me. We only have about a half mile left now anyways.”
My cheeks flush hotly at the thought of laying across Collin’s fit, shirtless body for, however long it takes to float half a mile. I glance around and see the rest of the crew nodding and Jeremy wading in my direction, presumably to handle the re-tying of the tubes.
Once he reaches my spot on the rocks, I hand him my deflated yellow piece of rubber dejectedly. Then I wade the way he came from, into the center, towards Collin. I stand to his side, avoiding looking directly at him, suddenly shy at the thought of having to lay on top of him for an indeterminable amount of time.
Too soon, Jeremy calls, “All set.”
Everyone settles back into their tubes, except for Jeremy who steadies ours while Collin gets in. They both turn expectant gazes to me, where I’m rooted to the ground a few feet away. Reluctantly, I trudge forward, eyeing Collin apprehensively.
Do I lay on my back or my stomach? Which would be less awkward?
Collin makes the decision for me. He tips forward and snags my wrist, yanking me towards him to fall face first into his chest. He uses his hands to cushion the blow so I don’t smack my nose against his stone-like pecs.
Jeremy chuckles as he releases our tube then hops onto his own. With his feet no longer anchoring us into place, our chain resumes drifting along the river, our portion of the set awkwardly sagging to one side, due to the missing tube.
I’m sprawled across Collin’s chest; my arms tucked underneath me against his body and my legs creating a stiff, straight line off the side of the tube, hovering above the water.
“Let me help you get comfortable,” Collin drawls quietly, his voice sounding a bit raspy as it hits my ears.
I nod against his chest after I realize he’s waiting for my permission to touch me. Seconds later, his warm palms grip around my upper thighs. He lifts me more fully across his body, aligning our crotches in the center of the tube, with my knees curling around either side of him, dipping into the water. The backs of my feet rest against the sides of the tube near his knees.
He briefly moves his hands, tugging my arms upward to wrap around his neck. Once he’s satisfied with my positioning, he moves his hands back down, to rest underneath my bottom. He supports some of my weight with his palms, presumably so we don’t sink too far into the water and drag against the rocks a couple feet below the surface.
“More comfortable?” he asks, his voice more of a growl than the genteel drawl I’m used to hearing.
I contemplate his question, stretching my arms up and out, and wriggling around a bit. The motion causes my barely covered chest to scrape against his and our centers to meld even closer together. Collin inhales sharply, his hands cupping my ass tightening with his breath.
Instead of raising me up like I expected, he pushes me slightly up, then pulls my weight back down. My eyes widen and this time, my breath catches. Collin watches me with a hooded gaze, as he repeats the motion causing heat to flare between the two of us.
“Hey, you two. Don’t use this time to get frisky! We’re all still here you know,” Katie shouts in her peppy voice. The rest of the group joins in, chuckling at our expense and yelling their agreements.
The words, although joking, are like a bucket of ice-cold water. The flush in my cheeks instantly transitions into embarrassment and I watch as Collin’s eyes open wide. He scans our surroundings suddenly, like he forgot where we were.
I know I definitely did.
Collin finally drawls out, “Jealousy isn’t pretty, Katie.” His warm voice, drifting gently over the river like a summer breeze, his tone showing that he’s joking.
“Ugh, as if,” she responds, with faux offense.
The group laughs again and the sounds of chatter slowly resume around us. Collin pushes his back against the tube, placing his mouth closer to my ear. The feeling of his breath tickling my skin makes me shiver and I almost miss his words. “At least you’ll tan evenly, this way.”
I laugh, appreciating his ability to joke in a slightly awkward situation, surrounded by his friends. The motion causes me to jostle against him slightly and Collin groans. He moves his hands up to my hips, squeezing them tightly to stop the movement.
We spend the rest of the float like that. My cheek resting against his chest, and his hands holding my hips in place with tense arms. Thankfully there isn’t too much of the river left.
It’s not long before one of the boys is hopping off their tubes and towing our chain closer to the river’s edge. Once we’re in place, I can hear the rest of the group begin to move out of their tubes. Their voices becoming harder to hear as they leave the river to head towards the truck parked on the shore.
Unfortunately, I’m in a super awkward position and can’t move off Collin on my own. Jeremy seems to sense our dilemma and suddenly appears off the side of our tube. He walks closer and inspects the two of us settled in the center before scooping me into his arms and gently setting me onto the rocky shore, he pauses briefly, his blue eyes connecting with mine while I regain my equilibrium.
I wait for another second after he releases me, pausing before I join the others, to check if Collin needs help. A throat clearing next to me makes me jump as I wait, lost in my own thoughts. Glancing to my side, I see Jeremy’s gaze locked onto my chest.
As if he can feel my eyes on him, he hastily glances away to the other side of the river, then looks pointedly at Collin. When I follow the line of his eyes, I see Collin’s green gaze is also staring intently at my chest.
What the heck?
I don’t even have big boobs, so I have no idea what they’re gawking at.
Following their gazes, I glance down and then gasp. I fumble to cover my left boob which, at some point, became an escapee from its tiny triangle of cloth. My small handful of a breast is just out in the wind, my nipple pointing at attention.
As quickly as I can, I conceal the offending appendage. Once it’s secured, I glance around to see if anyone else caught the slip. I’m thankful when I see everyone else has started heading to the truck parked a half a dozen feet away. Their backs are to us, meaning it’s likely that no one else saw anything.
Without meeting the eyes of either of the boys, I join the others, trudging up the hill at the back of the pack headed to the truck, awash in embarrassment. Their chatter floats over me as I join them in the bed, and wait the few minutes it takes to get all our supplies loaded in.
The drive back to Collin’s SUV is much, much shorter than the river float and soon, we’re all saying our goodbyes. Several of the guys and girls give me a hug, saying things like they can’t wait to see me tomorrow and they’re so glad I was able to make it.
Despite the tit slip, I’m feeling cheerful as I pile into Collin’s SUV with the rest of our group. My weary body easily settles deep into the seat, ready to go home, take a shower and nap. I stare out the window as we drive down the same road from earlier, breathing a sigh of relief when the Golden Oaks sign comes into view.
Repeating the process from this morning, Collin drops his friends off at their houses in groups, until it’s just us two remaining. We continue in a comfortable silence back to my trailer, the radio softly crooning to us as the tires eat up the distance in a quarter of the time it would take me to bike.
Collin drives his SUV onto the grass in front of my trailer. He surprises me when he hops out and trails me up to the door. He stands beside me wordlessly, as I unlock the trailer and push open the thin piece of tin, revealing the inside.
“Would you like to come in?” I ask, hesitantly, nervous for him to see the rest of my home and realize the differences in how we were raised.
“Nah,” He says. “I just wanted to make sure you got
home safe.”
“Lots of danger lurking between your car and here,” I retort in a joking tone.
“Never know what could happen, even in that short distance,” he replies, his voice more serious than mine.
I remain quiet and we stand on my front porch, staring each other down. I silently will him to kiss me. Not bold enough to make the move myself, I attempt to transmit the message with my eyes.
Kiss me.
He leans forward and I feel victorious, my eyelids drifting down slowly with his nearness.
Expecting the feeling of his lips brushing against mine, I’m surprised when his light scruff scrapes the skin of my cheek instead. Hot breath fans against my ear as he whispers, “I’m not going to kiss you McKenzie Carslyle. Not yet, at least. But I will be here tomorrow at six forty-five, to drive you to school.”
A shiver travels down my spine, despite the warm air. How can he make something not sexy seem so sexual?
Collin places a quick peck against my cheek then straightens up. He retreats down the stairs, ambling backwards to his SUV. I’m stuck standing there, rooted to the ground, strangely aroused and feeling bereft after I didn’t get a goodnight kiss with everything that happened between us today.
My disappointment slowly transitions to anticipation as I replay the conversation in my head. He said “yet”. Which means he plans to kiss me, eventually. Pushing the thought aside, I ask a question that’s been nagging at my conscious since the first night we interacted at the park, “Why are you so nice to me, Collin Franzen?”
I don’t yell, but the words are easily carried across the still air. He pauses in the process of opening his door, swiveling on his heel. His eyes skim over me, still standing with the screen half open, the trailer a gaping pit of darkness at my back. “My parents always taught me people shouldn’t need any kind of motivation to be nice,” he drawls out, like kindness is obvious and inherent and everyone acts the way he does.
I nod my head like I understand the sentiment, but I don’t.
I really don’t.
My parents taught me it’s every person for themselves. Even the bonds of familial obligation couldn’t hold them, to stay here, with me. And although they didn’t say it in so many words, they treated kindness as a weakness to be exploited.
I allow Collin’s words linger in the air, releasing the screen from my grip. It drifts shut, closing me into the trailer and creating a barrier between Collin and I. Standing in the dark, I watch him get into his car and back out of the area in front of my home. I stay there, eyes focused on his SUV until his taillights disappear from sight.
His words continue to echo in my mind, growing more insistent each time they repeat.
People shouldn’t need any kind of motivation to be nice.
Chapter 12
The first day of school seems like it comes too quickly and takes too long to arrive, all at once. Every year usually feels like more of the same, but not this year. This year, senior year, is going to be different. I can sense it.
This year, instead of riding the bus or my bike, I stand outside my trailer waiting for Collin. He texted me after he got home, thanking me for spending the day with him and his friends, confirming his plan to drive me to school. He apologized for the early start, explaining he had a mandatory meeting for football.
I didn’t bother to tell him he’s actually picking me up later than I would have to catch the bus or start biking. Collin has probably never had to ride the bus or walk to school in his entire life; it wasn’t worth the awkward conversation attempting to explain what it’s like to grow up poor and essentially parentless.
Instead, I wait for him on my front porch, my midnight hair drifting down my back in a straight sheet, fluttering slightly every time a small breeze blows by. I’m wearing one of the dresses I saved from my mom’s tub of discarded clothing.
I hate using the things she left behind, as if it justifies her absence in a way, but I found the dress when I was searching for a swimsuit. It’s a brand-new gray maxi dress with thick straps, dipping into a round neck and almost hitting the floor, despite my height. The tags were still attached, validating that it never really belonged to my mother anyway. I also have a white sweater tucked away in my worn backpack; in case they decide to be total sticklers about the dress code today.
My attention wanders around the park while I wait for Collin, my eyes briefly pausing on Derek’s trailer. The sight of it makes me queasy with guilt, reminding me of the arrangement I reluctantly agreed to; betraying my budding relationship with Collin for money.
I actually really am starting to like him, and his friends. They definitely didn’t act the way I expected them to when I joined their tubing adventure, as a last-minute addition. Everyone seemed super cool and welcoming. It may be because I had the Franzen stamp of approval, but still it was refreshing to spend the day having fun with kids my age.
An image of my slim funds, nestled in the tin can in my kitchen, pops to the forefront of my mind. As if the universe is reminding me of the reason I consented to conning Collin’s family in the first place. My situation is grim, and despite my best efforts, I’m left with limited options.
Exhaling deeply, I push all thoughts of the con and Collin away, tilting my face to watch the clouds instead. I focus on the fluffy white puffs drifting aimlessly by, attempting to identify any recognizable shapes in the sky above me.
“Looking for something in particular up there?” A warm voice drawls.
I startle, surprised I didn’t hear Collin’s SUV approaching, until I face his voice and realize he parked further away, rather than all the way into the yard like he usually does. He’s standing a dozen feet away, with his car about twice that distance. Maybe he wanted the chance to observe me in my natural habitat: being a little odd in the trailer park.
Grinning at Collin, I joke, “Just asking for answers on how I keep getting stuck with you.” I punctuate the words by sticking my tongue out playfully, showing I’m teasing.
Collin releases a playful growl then dashes straight towards me. I pace a half step back, but before I can escape, he rushes me, scooping me into his arms. Capturing me. He twirls us around, then carries me bridal style back to his car.
“Think you’re going to be stuck with me for a while yet,” he says, winking as he relinquishes his grip on my knees, allowing my feet to fall to the dirt next to the passenger-side, my body sliding down his until I’m firmly on the ground.
I giggle in response as he releases me. His grin looms above my face for a few seconds, his eyes sparkling with mirth. Without another word, he steps away and rounds the car, jumping into the driver’s seat with ease.
Following his cue, I open the passenger door and climb in cautiously, to avoid dirtying my dress with the dusty exterior of his car. Once I’m settled inside, Collin turns the key and proceeds to drive to school. Music floats lightly out the speakers but we remain mostly silent, with Collin focusing on driving and me watching the scenery fly by through his tinted windows.
The trip which normally lasts almost an hour, takes a quarter of that time. The ability to get around by car versus bike or bus is no joke. I could get accustomed to the convenience of being driven to class every day.
The ride is smooth all the way through, ending as we pull into the school parking lot. Collin picks a spot close to the brick building, then waits by the hood for me. He holds my hand, intertwining our fingers as we approach the double front doors of the building.
I tug on his hand, as we hit the bottom step and he turns to look at me with a question in his eyes. “I think I’m going to wait out here. It’s still a little while until school starts and I don’t want to lurk in the building,” I say the words with a reassuring smile, not wanting him to think I’m ungrateful for the ride.
His face instantly relaxes and he releases my hand. In a quick movement, his palm grips the back of my head, holding me in place. He slowly moves closer, softly kissing my forehead with his plump lips.
The simple affection makes my breath catch.
Collin Franzen is Dangerous.
When he reels back, I glance up at him with a question in my eyes and he smiles gently. “I just like you McKenzie Carslyle,” he drawls with a shrug, already able to read me after the few days we’ve spent together.
He doesn’t wait for my reply, climbing up the steps and entering through the right side of the double doors. “See you at lunch,” he calls over his shoulder, giving a small wave before disappearing into our school.
Exhaling a sigh, I slip off my backpack and allow it slide to the ground. Crossing my legs, I relax against the peeling metal handrail, contemplating how I want to spend the time before class starts. I slide my ancient phone out of my pocket, starting a game of snake. Jamming the keys down, I grow the snake with each little snack on the screen, but I become bored after about three minutes.
I’ve abandoned my phone and started picking at my cuticles when a flash of orange-red hair catches the corner of my eye. I glance up to see Katie hustling towards the building.
“Hey Kenzie!” She exclaims while she’s still a half-dozen yards away.
My eyes scan her form seeing that she’s dressed in the bright blue and black cheerleading uniform the squad wears at assemblies and games. I’m assuming she’s here for a mandatory team meeting, like Collin.
“Hi Katie,” I reply, less excited than her overly peppy tone, but still friendly.
She stops right in front of me, plopping a huge duffle to the ground nearby. The sound it emits when it hits the pavement makes it seem like it weighs at least thirty pounds. My eyebrows raise, but I don’t have a chance to ask what’s inside.
Katie starts in a chipper tone, “Are you here for the cheerleading meeting? Wow, that’s so cool. It would be awesome to have you on the squad; you already get along so well with everyone. We can walk together it starts in five minutes!”
I don’t think she inhales a single breath the entire time she speaks and it takes a few moments for my brain to catch up with the overload of information she supplied in approximately six seconds. “Oh,” I reply slowly. “I wasn’t here for the cheerleading meeting…”
