by Ally Blake
“Then air it is.” Nadia put her cocktail back on the table and stood, running her damp hands down the thighs of her jeans.
She pointed the way to a balcony populated with beer drinkers and followed as Ryder made a way through the throng and to a quiet patch of railing. Music pulsed through the windows above. Soft chatter spread from the star-gazers outside. While Nadia breathed deep of the cool night air, the busy street below, the Prahran railway station peeking between the nearby buildings.
Then, without preface, Ryder asked, “When I asked you out for coffee, why didn’t you tell me you had plans with Sam?” and with a darkness in his voice that Nadia hadn’t seen coming.
Completely foxed by the direction of his conversation, her incredulity was ripe as she blurted, “Why? Do you have a problem with that?”
He stayed silent, but the twitch in his cheek gave her the answer.
“You do!” She jabbed his forearm with a finger; when it hit solid muscle it bounced right back. “What do you think I’m going to do, corrupt her? Buddy, that venomous green potion masquerading as a drink back there was all hers.”
Ryder’s hands curled around the railing, the frown marring his forehead easing some. “She’s...open-hearted. She’s never been very good at protecting herself. That’s long since fallen to me.”
Okay, then. Not so much an indictment on her. This was about him. Nadia lowered her mental dukes. “I’d say Ben back there has you covered on that score.”
Ryder scoffed, his frown back with a vengeance.
“What? Ben’s smart, solid, and he’s clearly smitten with her. I’m totally jealous.”
“Jealous?” Well, that wiped the frown from his face. He turned to lean his elbows against the railing as he stared through the crowd at the young man scooched low in the soft seat, the collar of his jacket bunched up about his ears.
Nadia rolled her eyes. “Not of Sam, you goose. Of how much Ben adores her. I’ve never even been close to so adored.”
Ryder’s eyes slid back to hers, an eyebrow raised in raging disbelief.
“Admired by audiences, sure,” she said, floating a who cares hand between them. “Envied by other dancers, oh yeah. Enjoyed by men, you can count on it. But adored?” She shook her head as Ryder continued to stare at her as if she’d grown an extra head. “Don’t panic, Ryder. I’m not about to huddle in a corner and cry. A dancer’s life is an endless series of rejections with just enough triumphs thrown in to keep us hungry. We’re a tough breed, Kent women and dancers both. And it’s hard to be tough and adorable at the same time.”
“Puppies are adorable,” said Ryder, his eyes now roving over her face, her hair, her shimmering silver top that she’d not all that long ago imagined slid over her skin with his touch. When his eyes roved back to hers she felt a good degree hotter. “Baby bunnies too.”
“And your sister.”
“Alas, my sister has a tendency to be that, to my constant disadvantage. As for you...” Nadia fought the urge to twist and turn under his heady gaze. “Adorable you may not be. But only because you’re something else entirely.”
The urge to ask what he thought was so acute she only just managed to swallow it down. If she went there, there’d be no going back.
Instead she leant on the railing and looked out into the night.
“My adorable sister is really marrying the twerp, isn’t she?” Ryder asked at long last.
“Yeah,” Nadia said on a relieved laugh. “Did you think it was all pretend?”
“No. Maybe.” He ran a hand over his face, then through his hair, leaving it in spikes. And upon witnessing the first spark of vulnerability she’d ever seen in the man, Nadia felt her heart kick hard against her ribs.
In punishment, she bumped her hip against the railing hard enough to leave a bruise, and said, “I see what’s going on here. It’s like something out of a Jane Austen novel. The big sister—or in this case brother—overlooked, left on the shelf, while the younger sister shines.”
As hoped, the ridiculousness smacked the vulnerability from his eyes. Then he grinned, his teeth flashing white in the moonlight. “Alas, I am a confirmed bachelor.”
“Confirmed by whom?”
“Every woman I’ve ever been with.”
Not dated. Not known. Been with. Nadia breathed deep.
“I’m a determined man when motivated, Miss Kent. And my motivations lead me to work eighty hours a week in a job I take seriously. I am less motivated to give up my standing holiday in Belize every Australian winter, one ticket return. Or full rights to the remote control. And at the end of the day I go home to the bachelor pad to end all bachelor pads.”
“Posters of women in bikinis straddling large...motorbikes all over your walls?”
Guy didn’t even blink. “No. But it’s a damn fine idea.”
“Yeeeahhh,” she drawled, letting her grin out to play. “That’s what I thought. And yet even with such a fine example of determined independence to steer her to rights, your sister has succumbed to the dark side. Give in, big brother. It’s happened. Your little sister’s all grown up. Time’s nearing where you’ll have to find someone else to boss around.”
When Ryder stilled, Nadia wondered if she’d said something wrong. Pressed too far. But then his face creased into a rueful smile; his hazel eyes crinkled, attractive arcs bracketed his mouth, drawing attention to his fine lips.
Stern and formal, the man was breathtaking. Smiling, the guy could stop hearts.
Not quite able to catch her breath, Nadia turned away, enough to squint into the bar. Then, thankful she’d found a subject changer, she clicked her fingers. “I forgot to tell you earlier—I found out who owns the building.”
He raised an eyebrow in query.
“It’s in my bag, inside. Name and number. Remind me later. Or next week. If tonight’s lesson didn’t scare you off for good.”
“First lesson I was asked to take off my jacket. The second you talked me out of my shirt. I couldn’t possibly miss the third.”
“Funny man.”
“I try.”
Nadia smiled. Then she shivered, realising belatedly how much the night air had cooled her down.
Without a word, Ryder shucked his jacket from his back and slid it over her shoulders. She curled herself into it, goose bumps springing up all over when she found it near scorching from the man’s body heat.
“Ta,” she said.
“Any time.” And through the darkness he smiled.
Just like that something dislodged inside her.
It hadn’t happened often in her life that someone had offered her much in the way of warmth, much less any time.
Her mum had left when she was two, she’d never known her father, and the grandmother who’d raised her could have played indifference for Australia. Looking back over the past months she’d come to see that her ex had treated her more like an enchanting sidekick than something necessary, something precious, and she’d stayed with him for two years.
Now some guy had given her a damn jacket, hardly the first time it had happened anywhere in the world, and yet Nadia held it tight about herself to keep ahold of the kindness as long as she possibly could.
Her voice sounded as if it were coming from miles away as she heard herself say, “Was it really just dumb luck that you and I both happened to end up here tonight, Ryder?”
Ryder watched her a moment, his dark eyes flicking between hers. Then he shook his head.
Her next breath in was shaky. “Sam told you I’d be here, didn’t she?”
A nod that time.
“So you came to warn me off being her friend? Or was there another reason?”
Ryder swore, the word tearing from him as if he’d been holding it in all night. Then, without preamble, without waiting for permission
, he slid his hand behind her neck and kissed her.
Light splintered behind Nadia’s eyes at the touch of Ryder’s mouth on hers, the sparks settling over her like a dream. She came out the other end, back to reality, to find herself melting. Her limbs liquid, her resistance stripped bare.
And Ryder fed her long, hot, wet, slow kisses. His fingers shifting through her hair, his body leaning slowly into hers.
She turned into him, sliding a hand over his shoulder, the other around his waist, over his backside, beneath the hem of his shirt till she found his scorching-hot skin. He groaned into her mouth. And she took it, opening herself to him, to his heat, his skill, his need that quickly ratcheted to meet her own.
“Ryder! Oh, sorry.”
Nadia heard the words, but Ryder pulled away long before she would have found it in her to stop.
“Sam,” he said, his voice gruff as it rumbled through Nadia’s bones. “What is it?”
“We were about to head off, and I was going to ask... Never mind.”
Nadia shook her hair from her face and lifted her head to look at her friend, who was steadfastly looking anywhere but at the two of them.
“Spit it out.”
“For a lift. But you’re busy. So I’ll get a cab. Don’t worry. Have fun and I’ll catch you later!”
“You going to Ben’s?”
“Well...no. Mine,” said Sam. “He has an early flight to Sydney for work, so I’m going home alone. He doesn’t trust me not to keep him up all night!”
At that Ryder turned to rock. “I’ll take you.”
And Nadia felt it like a loss. In direct proportional response, she instantly stepped away, ridding herself of his jacket, and holding it out on one finger, forcing Ryder to look her in the eyes. To apologise. Or at least look chagrined.
She felt as if she’d been winded when his eyes said something else entirely—he wanted her. Still. More. They weren’t done here. And heat pooled in Nadia’s belly with a ferocity even she didn’t see coming.
“Take it,” she said, her voice gravelly. “Give me five minutes upstairs again and I’ll be hot to trot.”
His eyes narrowed, and his mouth opened as if he was about to say something, something she would have paid a lot of money to hear, but, needing to steel herself against the sensations stampeding through her before they got the better of her, she threw the jacket at him, forcing him to break eye contact as he caught it.
Then he seemed to remember himself, and his sister, and with a nod he and his warm jacket and hot kisses walked away.
So sorry! Sam mouthed as she backed into the bar.
Nadia waved a “don’t worry” hand, before shoving it in the back pocket of her jeans so she didn’t have to see how much it shook. But Sam’s third-wheel moment was the best thing that could have happened. Nadia’d been in danger of jumping into the guy’s arms, wrapping her legs around him and not letting go.
When she could no longer see either Fitzgerald, Nadia made her way through the bar and to the bottom of the staircase.
She took one step up, the doof doof doof of the beat and the play of light at the top calling to her. But there she stopped, a finger pressed to her lips to find them swollen and tender. And she realised, for the first time in memory, she wouldn’t find what she needed up there.
Instead, she turned on her heel and headed out into the night.
* * *
“So.”
Ryder glanced in his rear-view mirror, changed down a gear as he neared a red light, and ignored Sam.
“You and Nadia, hey.”
“Sam,” he warned, when ignoring her seemed not to be working.
“Oh, come on. Anyone could see that you two have the hots for each other, even before I found you snogging on the patio.” Sam shivered for good measure, while Ryder fought the urge to stick the car in Neutral and leap out of the door.
What the hell had he been thinking? He hadn’t kissed a girl in a club in years. He knew privacy served a man better in that regard every time. And yet Nadia Kent slid under his skin and tapped right into his darkest instincts, making him forget all he knew. He ran a hand up the back of his neck and wondered how far things might have gone if they hadn’t been interrupted. Till even the damn wondering made him ache.
“She is fabulous, though, don’t you think?” asked Sam, settling deeper into the seat with a sigh.
Engaged though Sam might be, and clearly not the innocent little girl in plaits and frilly dresses she’d once been, he was not about to share with his twenty-four-year-old sister his thoughts on Nadia Kent.
Thankfully the light turned green, so Ryder could instead concentrate on grinding the gears and pressing his frustration into the accelerator. His car leapt from the starting gate with bravura and a gratifying press of backs to seats.
“And she’s been brilliant for Ben and me,” Sam continued regardless. “All this wedding stuff is stressful. We tried keeping it small but every time I look around it seems to have spread till I can’t see to the end of it any more.” Her voice trailed away with a soft sigh. “But as soon as we get to dance class it all just falls away. It’s just Ben, and me. Nadia knows how to be unobtrusive, while at the same time setting the most romantic mood.”
Nadia unobtrusive? Ryder couldn’t think of a term that described her less. Stick her in any room, and she’d be the most obvious thing in it.
“We call it Thursday Night Foreplay.”
Ryder slammed on the brakes so hard the car shuddered beneath them. He eased off, caught traction and drove the rest of the way home five kilometres under the speed limit.
When Sam didn’t say anything for a while, Ryder risked a glance sideways to find her smiling at him. Then she raised an eyebrow in question. With her big grey eyes and sweet face she might look as if she ought to be frolicking in a field of daisies, but she was his half-sister and had more than half his stubborn streak.
Gritting his teeth against an urge to tell her to mind her own damn business, he said, “She’s your friend.”
“So what? I’m a big girl. I can handle it. So don’t let that be your excuse this time.”
“This time?” he asked, then wished he’d kept his damn mouth shut.
Sam turned, gripping the seat belt. “You’re eleven years older than me, man. You should be married with three kids by now! Don’t think I don’t know it’s me who stopped you.”
Ryder shuffled on his seat, never good at this part of it all. “Don’t get yourself in a knot, kid. I don’t do anything I don’t want to do.”
“Sure about that?”
Ryder’s cheek twitched. Okay, so he’d been more circumspect than other men might have been. But he’d never seen it as a sacrifice. It had benefited him that the women in his life had taken his discretion as reticence for anything long term. A reticence that was entirely genuine, only for less altruistic reasons than Sam had put on him.
“I need you to know it’s never been about you,” he said, his voice steady.
“It’s about Dad,” she said with a bigger sigh. “You can’t let him rule your life. You’ve told me so enough times.”
He glanced at his sister then, and in her eyes saw prudence and wisdom. When had that happened? Since Ben, a little voice told him. Open-hearted she might be, but she was also twenty-four. He’d started his own company at twenty-four. “I own every decision I’ve ever made, Sam. Every one of them was ultimately all about me. About what I want my life to be.”
She tilted her head towards him, the street lights flickering over her face. “Okay, then. And while we’re on that subject...”
Ryder held his breath, sure Sam was about to hit him about Nadia again, and worried that in his wound-up state he wouldn’t be able to convince her it didn’t mean anything. Because that kiss had been...indescribable. Seconds, mi
nutes? He had absolutely no idea how long it lasted, only that the micro-second he decided to go there his world went up in flames.
He felt himself unfold all over when she said, “Let’s talk about me. I know that you’ve only ever wanted to protect me. To make sure I feel happy, and safe. And for that I love you more than you will ever know.”
Ryder spared her a glance. “Right back at ya, kid.”
“But I have Ben for that now. He’s my knight–in-shining-armour, my prince, leaving you to finally just be my brother. Not my keeper, my minder, my shield.” Sam put her hand on Ryder’s on the steering wheel. “So in case you actually need to hear me say it, my big stubborn mountain of a brother, I hereby set you free.”
The fact that she’d come to him for a ride an hour earlier seemed to contradict that, but when he looked at her he found she was serious.
“Free to date, to have lady friends—”
“Okay. Fine. I get it. I have your blessing to...”
“Shtup.”
“For the love of...” he muttered as the gate to Sam’s apartment complex opened noisily at the press of a remote, before he rolled down the drive to the underground garage. “How about this—you and Ben can go right ahead and repopulate the planet all on your lonesome, so long as I don’t have to hear about it.”
She cocked her head, a frown marring her smooth forehead. “Ryder—”
“Didn’t you just set me free?”
Her mouth twisted, then with a sigh and a nod she unhooked her seat belt, kissed his cheek, then leapt out of the door, and jogged to the lift. Ryder waited till she swiped the security card and was inside the lift up to her secure apartment before he turned the car around and headed for home.
By the time he threw his keys into a cut-glass bowl on the heavy table by the front door of his own split-level, waterfront residence it was well after midnight with more than half the working week ahead of him.
When restlessness began to flicker through him, he shook it off. He loved his job. It was extremely rewarding. Only at times, of late, he’d found himself wanting...more.
He glanced at the vintage drafting board in the corner. It had been his mother’s. He’d been about three or four when she’d found it somewhere or other, cleaned it up, and placed it in a brightly lit corner of the family home. Over the years she would gravitate there to sketch out ideas. Ryder had drawn his first pictures of houses on that table, boxes with triangles for roofs. Multiple chimneys. Wings. Not tall buildings. Not back then.
