“No. I’m an only child, and my parents were not close with their families, so it was just us.”
“That’s…” Kieran began, seemingly at a loss for words for the first time since Lore had known him. He looked to Nolan, searching for something to say before turning back to her. She’d forgotten how unusual her life was, how the isolation was alien to other people. She probably shouldn’t have said anything in the first place. Now she’d messed up the entire evening by making them feel bad for her.
“What did you do for Thanksgiving, for Hanukkah…or Christmas?”
She smiled thankfully at Kieran’s attempt to pick the conversation back up. “I don’t really celebrate that time of year anyway. It would have been Christmas, but my father was usually away on business during the holidays, and my mother was never in a celebrating spirit in his absence. He did however make sure to always be home for New Year’s Eve. It was our favorite holiday.” She chuckled at the memory she usually kept buried, holding her wineglass up to rest on her lip in thought. The scent reminded her of the vintage her mother and father used to drink while she belted out “Auld Lang Syne” with the crowds of people on TV. The stupid song, she used to call it. It hadn’t really been stupid. It had been wonderful. “My father used to tell me that I had to have a New Year’s resolution or else the New Year wouldn’t come. New Year’s was the one time of year when the world seemed to just melt away and it was the three of us in our little bubble. Nothing else mattered.”
“That sounds magical,” Nolan said as he brushed back a bit of hair falling loose from her braid. His knuckles skimmed her cheek, and the warmth from his touch lulled her further into memory. “You must miss them very much.”
“It was magical,” she corroborated with a sigh and finally took a sip of the wine. It wasn’t the same wine her father had preferred, of course. It was just a hint of something to provoke a memory, a memory that led down a darker path. It was time to move on. “But I lost them both in different ways long before they died.”
Kieran took her cue to continue, leaning back in his chair with a lazy grace. “Do you do anything for the holidays now?”
“Yes, because I am just the wild and crazy kind,” Lore said with a sarcastic smile. “No. It was just me. What do you do for the holidays?”
“It’s just us during those times.” Kieran returned her smile, sweetly folding his hand over Nolan’s. They had probably spent numerous holidays together in rapturous bliss. It almost made her jealous.
“And how long has it been just the two of you?”
“Four years.” Nolan chuckled, shaking his head as if he couldn’t believe how long they’d been together.
She placed her hand over her heart, touched by their dedication to one another. “That’s wonderful.”
Kieran took a bite of bread, his mouth full and eyes narrowed. Even with food in his mouth, the man was too attractive for his own good. “It always makes me laugh when people are surprised by how long we’ve been together.”
“I don’t think they’re surprised. I think they’re mourning the loss of two attractive single men.”
Kieran leaned forward, his arms resting on the table and the light of the small votive candle making his dark eyes glow. “You think we’re attractive?”
“Is that a real question?”
He chuckled and shrugged with mock diffidence. “I’d like to know if you think we’re attractive.”
She swallowed a glass of wine, gulping so loudly the entire dining room probably heard how strongly they made her pulse jump. “Of course I do. What hot-blooded woman wouldn’t? Now that I’ve stroked your ego, why don’t you tell me what this whole dinner thing is about? Why the persistence?”
“We just wanted to get to know you,” Nolan claimed innocently, his finger tracing the rim of his wineglass, his eyes never leaving hers.
“Mmmhmm. Nolan, I may not be the most sociable person, but I am by no means an idiot.”
“We never said—”
“From my perspective, you both either want to get close to me because I have come into a large sum of money and wish to use me for it, an option I have already judged both of you incapable of. The other option is so preposterous I won’t even speak it out loud. And I’m sorry, gentleman, but I refuse to be your so-called beard.” She took a gulp of wine, spurred on by the heat it gave her, all of a sudden feeling slightly mad at them for no reason.
“Is it so impossible for us to want to be your friend?” Kieran asked.
“Yes.”
“Why?”
“Nobody goes out of their way to be my friend.” She pointed her finger right at Kieran’s chest. “And before you get that pitying look, Kieran, please remember that I also do not go out of my way to make friends. I like my solitude. I like the way I live my life.” What she didn’t like was having to make excuses for herself, which was exactly what this conversation was turning into. The mere curiosity they had about her was starting to feel like some sort of accusation.
“Well, prepare to be amazed,” Nolan whispered, his eyes narrowing, no doubt all too aware of her agitated state. “We wanted to have dinner with you because we are intrigued by you. We wanted to have dinner with you because we are attracted to you.”
“You’re in a relationship. With each other. What does it matter if you’re attracted to me?”
“You are the most confounding woman I’ve ever met,” Nolan continued, looking determined as hell. “We, two handsome men—”
“Two humble men, as well, I see.”
Nolan wisely ignored her sarcasm, which only stoked the fire of her aggravation further. “—are telling you we think you are attractive, and you ask what does that matter?”
“Well, yes. I just don’t understand how your being attracted to me relates to taking me out to dinner. You’re in a relationship with one another. Where could this attraction possibly go?”
She was so confused, the conflicting need she felt to push and pull them away fought for dominance within her. She wanted to melt into them, let them take her on a wild, if brief, ride. Because if they were truly offering what she thought they were offering, then the only end in sight she could see would be them having their fill of her while Lore remained solitary, alone. She didn’t think she could survive the gluttony of gorging on them only to be left starving once they were gone.
Her emotions weren’t the only cause of confusion. Their motivations were almost equally confounding. Lore could usually read people pretty well, a skill her father had taught her on some of their more adventurous outings, but with Nolan and Kieran she was flummoxed. What was their end goal here? What was all the flirting about? Attracted to her? An attraction between two people could only go two places, in or out. They clearly couldn’t go in, so why were they…why were they staring at her so intently? Why was Kieran’s gaze trained on her lips? Why had they said all those things to her the past few times they’d run into one another? Why had they cornered her by the back tents and kissed her neck?
“Lore?” Nolan asked, his brow turned down in concern.
She pushed nonexistent flyaway strands out of her face, then moved her gaze from one man to the other, remembering the fantasy they had conjured with a few simple words back in the coffee shop. How could they both want her and be okay with that? How could she ever find the strength to say no if they wanted her with just a fraction of the passion with which she wanted them?
“Where can this go?” she asked quietly, no longer angry but so nervous, wondering what they would do next.
“Well, it can go to dessert,” Kieran said gently, a small and understanding smile lighting his eyes.
“It can go to the car,” Nolan added, his voice so rumbly she could have sworn it sent vibrations shooting through the long-untouched depths of her body. Places aching to be touched by not one but two men.
“It can go to our place,” Kieran continued. “Or your place, whichever makes you comfortable.”
“It can go to a bed.”
Nolan leaned in once more, bringing her hand to his lips and letting her feel their smoothness as he spoke. The sensation of his breath on her skin sent shivers shooting up her arm and traveling with lightning speed to settle between her legs. She clenched her thighs together, needing some sort of stabilizing force to keep her upright. “It can go to you surrounded by Kieran and me, consumed by the pleasure we want to give you.”
She could barely breathe, she wanted it so badly. “This is…”
“Is it something you might like?” Kieran asked, moving his chair closer to hers, their wine and the potential meal they had yet to order all but forgotten.
She laughed, confounded by them. “Like? Again, what hot-blooded woman wouldn’t want that?” The exotic nature of their offer came into focus, but so did the reality of her life. “But I don’t think I’m what you’re looking for.”
“Why is that?” Nolan asked, continuing to sip from her knuckles in delicate licks and kisses.
“I’m not an innocent—”
“I bet you’re not.” Kieran chuckled, his hand finding her thigh under the table and rubbing it up and down over the fabric of her blue dress.
Right.” She should tell him stop; she really should. “Um, but…I am not the most experienced woman.”
“We don’t care about that,” Kieran whispered, his hand pausing to squeeze ever so slightly. “We care about what you want, what you desire. We look at you, and we see this composed and contained woman. A woman who has such a tight leash on herself that she can barely breathe.”
A familiar accusation, one she resented, even more so coming from Kieran. “That is unfair.”
“Am I wrong? When was the last time you slouched or cursed or left the dishes unwashed?”
“That’s just counterproductive and good posture can prevent back issues later in life.” She couldn’t help but be facetious as her confounding anger grew once more.
Nolan jumped in, dropping her hand to cup her nape. His eyes were on fire. “We’ve only seen a glimpse of the woman we know is locked inside you, but fuck, we want to meet her. If you don’t let her out, she’ll suffocate and die.”
Enough. She wanted them, but she also didn’t need them to fix her. She wasn’t broken like they so clearly thought she was. She didn’t need a couple of men to put her pieces back together. There were no pieces left. She removed her napkin from her lap and placed it on the table, folding it up carefully. “This won’t work. I told you I was not what you’re looking for. I think I’m going to go.”
“Wait.” Nolan leaned back, startled by her abrupt declaration. “What? No—”
“You see me as some stuck-up, boring woman who just needs a man or two to whip her into shape, don’t you? How can my buttoned-up life sustain my so-called spirit, right? I like my life. I like the quiet and the consistency. Over and over I’ve been told by any number of well-wishers that I need to let loose and live a little. Well, I’m sorry to disappoint, but what you see is what you get. You can’t change me, and I do not wish to be changed. I don’t need you to mold me into the perfect woman. You’ll have to find someone else for your little pet project.”
Lore stood, incited by her anger and the constant nagging she could hear in the back of her mind from all the people in her life telling her to loosen up. She grabbed her jacket and purse without putting them on and muttered a quick “Good evening,” before turning on her heel and heading to her car. They followed.
“Lore, please,” Kieran said. “Lore.”
“We’re sorry. Don’t go yet. You’ve misunderstood. Nobody needs to fix you. You’re perfect.”
“We really didn’t—”
Their begging pissed her off even more. It pissed her off so much that all she wanted to do was shut them up. Shut them up and prove the idiots wrong. She might be a quiet and contained woman, but she was not a fucking stick in the mud.
As Kieran began another barrage of empty apologies, she turned on her heel once more, stopping them in their tracks right next to her car. She took a deep breath, framed Kieran’s handsome face, and plastered her lips to his. After the initial shock, he moved his body into hers, crowding her against the car and sipping at her lips. Fuck, it was everything she’d fantasized about and more. But she wasn’t done yet.
She shoved him away, taking note of his gasping breath and the rigid bulge in his pants before turning to Nolan and reaching up on her tippy toes to bring his face down to hers. Even though he’d had a moment to witness what she just did with Kieran, he still seemed a bit shell-shocked, not able to engage in the kiss until she bit his bottom lip. But, oh boy, did he engage. Nolan grabbed her hips, then squeezed tight and moaned into her mouth. He pushed his tongue in, taking what she hadn’t offered, tearing down any and all physical barriers she had ever put in place.
But this kiss wasn’t about capitulation. She wasn’t saying yes to them, just giving them a taste of what they couldn’t have. Basically, she was being a bitch. And she loved every second of it.
“Just because I keep to myself and like good posture and quiet evenings doesn’t mean I’m not a fucking person. I’m the goddamned hellion that neither of you is going to get.”
She took all kinds of bitchy pleasure in their shocked faces as she slammed the door on her car and drove away. It was gonna be a long night with her trusty vibrator to soothe the blood boiling in her untouched core.
Would it cost her too much pride to turn around and invite them over to fuck her? She shook her head, allowing herself a small grin, and kept on driving.
KIERAN PRESSED HIS fingers to his lips as they watched Lore drive out of the parking lot. He could still feel the imprint of heat she’d left on his skin like a brand. Nolan curled his hand around Kieran’s to entwine their fingers, tugging him back to the present.
“What the hell was that?” Nolan asked, staring at the exit of the parking lot. He looked as perplexed as Kieran felt.
“I…have no fucking clue. What did we say? We must have said something.” Kieran could hardly think past the kiss. Hell, the last five minutes of their dinner had been a blur. He had barely had enough time to drop some cash on the table before running after her.
“Maybe it’s just a woman thing.”
“Clearly it’s a fucking woman thing, as we have no idea what just happened. But you know what? I’m not just gonna let that slide. C’mon.”
They ran to the car, Kieran diving into the driver’s seat, even though Nolan had driven to the restaurant.
“Where are we going?” Nolan asked, sliding into the passenger seat, a fevered light illuminating his eyes.
“We’re going after her.” Kieran put the car in gear and peeled out of the lot, barely missing a few pedestrians in his anxious state. “If she gets to do the woman thing and run away from us for some convoluted reason, then we get to do the man thing and follow her in dominant indignation.”
Nolan slammed the dash with his hand, an adrenaline-fueled laugh bellowing out of his chest. “Christ, I love you.”
“You may not if she calls the cops on us for stalking.”
“She wouldn’t do that…right?”
“Hell hath no fury, my friend.”
They made it to her address in record time. Nolan ducked out of the car first, running up to the door and slamming his fist against the worn wood. Kieran was quick to follow, shutting off the car and joining his lover on Lore’s porch, representing a united front. They wanted this woman. They knew she wanted them. What the hell was in the way of getting what all three wanted?
The door opened to a harried-looking Lore. Her cheeks were still flushed with anger, and the look of shock on her face on seeing them standing on her porch was worth the potential restraining order she could file against them for following her.
“Go away.”
Nolan’s hand shot out to block her from slamming the door in their faces.
She growled in anger. Growled. The most composed and kept-together woman Kieran had ever met growled at them. Se
eing her in a fit was sheer magnificence.
“What are you doing here?” she asked, looking up and down the street nervously, keeping any riotous emotions at bay by remaining soft spoken. Fuck that shit. “The night is over. Go home.”
“We don’t want it to end,” Nolan said quietly, his deep voice a balm to Kieran’s agitated state of mind.
“What do you want from me?” Lore let go of the door, conceding she would never be able to shut it with Nolan blocking her. She crossed her arms and stuck her hip out in typical pissed-off female style. Kieran ached to put his hands on those hips and tug her close, make her knees go weak from a kiss. Yes, he was behaving like a barbaric ass, but he could barely focus on anything other than what he so dearly wanted.
“This behavior is ridiculous. I am mad at you.” Well, at least she wasn’t trying to act like nothing was wrong. They could work with this. “That means you let me storm off and be by myself while watching and being confused. That is how this works.”
Kieran laughed, taking a chance and stepping closer. He stroked his knuckles along her cheek in a brief caress. She didn’t back away. “This is life,” Kieran said. “It’s messy. You can’t control everything, Lore. You can’t control what our reactions will be.”
“I don’t accept that.” She shook her head vehemently, avoiding his gaze and staring past them. Kieran wouldn’t allow her any measure of leeway. He took another step, crowding her, cradling her lovely, angry face in his hands. She was so fucking beautiful. Even annoyed as all hell as she was, he still wanted to eat her up.
“What are you doing? Why are you doing that?” she asked rapidly, her voice finally losing its cool disdain in favor of nerves. Kieran enjoyed knowing they had the ability to throw her as off balance as she did them. Maybe that’s what all that shit back at the restaurant had been about. Lore took pride in masking her emotions with congeniality and composure. How would she have felt if their presence alone threw her off axis so much it made her lose her grip on that well-honed control? No wonder she was floundering.
A New Resolution Page 9
