by TJ Penn
“I was wondering how long it was going to take you to notice that.” After Elizabeth walks off, I still stand there and watch him for the longest time trying to figure out what to do. Finally, I shove it all out of my mind for now and focus on orders.
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Chapter Fifteen
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After a long night of running orders, Robert goes out to get the car to take us all to the house. Robert had a friend drop his car by the house after we left for the game so that he could ride back with us. That man thinks of everything. As we pull up to the house I realize I’m not ready to say goodnight to him yet. As I’m getting out of the car, I decide to see if I can get him to stay here for a while.
“Hey, we’re planning to order a pizza and watch some movies. Do you want to stay and watch with us? I must warn you though; it’s horror movie night.”
He doesn’t answer as quick as I thought he would and that makes me more than a bit nervous. He was acting fine all night; I can’t think of any reason why he’d all of a sudden have reservations about staying. When I’m about to let him off of the hook and just say forget it, he answers me.
“Sure, I mean as long as Elizabeth doesn’t mind. I don’t want to be the guy that messes up your girl time.” I walk down to where he is and lead him into the house by his hand.
“Hey, Robert is joining us for the movie.”
The look on Robert’s face is one of complete shock. “You could have asked her if she minded me staying. This is your thing; I’m an intruder here. Seriously, ask her if she minds.”
Lord, he’s so adorable when he’s nervous. With an eye roll, I ask Elizabeth if she minds him staying. Of course, her answer was “yes” followed with a laugh because I actually asked her.
“Robert, you’ve got to learn we don't ask things around here. As long as the house stays in order, we do what we want.” Elizabeth informs him when she enters the living room. “So pick a seat and sit it down. The pizza is ordered and will be here in thirty. Should we start the movie or wait?”
After deciding to start the movie without the pizza, we head in to the living room. “Hey Elizabeth, do you want to take the couch?”
“If we give her the couch, exactly where are we going to sit?”
“Well, I figure if she wants to lay out you can take the chair and I can sit on the floor at your feet. I mean, I’m okay with that.”
Elizabeth walks to the recliner rolling her eyes. “There, problem solved. That leaves you two the couch. I thought it was a given that would be the set up, but nope, Robert being himself over thinks it. That boy is too nice for his own good at times. You know that, Bailey?”
“I know! What are we ever going to do about that?”
“Nice? I’ll show you nice.” I don’t have a chance to react before Robert is on top of me tickling me.
“Stop! I’m going to pee myself. Stop!”
“Where is that my issue?”
I do my best to wiggle away, but he’s just too strong for me to escape. At the feeling of being trapped, I start to panic. I feel like I can’t catch my breath. In the back of my mind, I can feel the weight is going, but I still have this over all sense of doom. When I think I’m about to break, I hear Robert’s voice cutting through the void. I let him lead me back to the present.
“Bailey, I’m sorry. Come back to be, baby.” When my eyes focus, I see Robert is on his knees next to the couch, and he is holding my hand. It’s not a tight grip, but firm enough to let me know he is there. Elizabeth is able to tell the moment has passed and tries to lighten the mood.
“Okay, you two settle back down, or we are never going to get this movie started. You both should like it.”
After the movie starts and the pizza arrives, I lay my head in Robert’s lap. I can feel myself drifting when he whispers in my ear. “Hey, by the way, practice should be an easy one if you want to work on your car tomorrow. I’ve nothing planned. I know you have work, but if I get out on time, I can come over and we can start on it. Then when you have to leave, I can finish it up.”
“Yeah, I like the sound of that plan. We have the late shift as always, so yeah, if you get done and want to we can get in a few hours under the hood.”
The rest of the night is spent watching movies and just relaxing. After three movies, Robert decides to head home and call it a night. I walk him out to his car still not ready to let him go. “Call me so I know you made it okay.” God, when did I become so sappy.
“Yeah I will.” He leans in to give me what is supposed to be a quick kiss, but I refuse to let him pull away. I feel him wrap his fingers in my hair as he gets more into the kiss. Before I can process what is happening, he spins me and pushes me up against his car. But before thing can get too out of hand, he pulls away and leans his forehead against mine.
“Man, you sure know how to make a guy want to stay.” With a final kiss to the end of my nose, he gets into his car. After watching him pull away, I know I have to fix this mess. I just hope that he can forgive me.
After hearing from Robert, I lay in my bed forming a plan to fix everything. I had gotten myself into this, and now, I have to find a way out. It would be my luck that I would fall for a guy I wasn’t supposed to. But with Robert it wasn’t a choice, no one could help but to like him, or in my case, love him.
I can only come up with one way to put a stop to the whole thing. I have to go to where the trouble started, and then tell Robert before she has a chance to. I resolve to go and see Ronda in the morning. I will just have to tell her I am out and that I will repay what money she has given me.
The plan to tell Robert is a bit more complicated. I have to find a way to make him hear me out. It would be easier if I could just tie him to a chair. That way, he can't storm out before I can calm him down. I know that isn’t realistic, but it would be the easiest way. I can only imagine exactly how pissed he is going to be not just at me but at Ronda. Above all else, I can’t let him lose it to the point that he ruins his career.
If I lose him, I can live with that; My stupidity led to this whole mess. I should have just walked away when Ronda told me her crazy plan. No, if I hadn’t done this, I wouldn’t know Robert. But, I also wouldn’t be the reason he is going to be hurt. With the ideas forming in my head, I fall into a restless sleep.
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Chapter Sixteen
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As soon as I wake up, my plan to tell Ronda I am through helping her hits me like a ton of bricks. I know as soon as I tell her; I have to tell Robert. I know it is going to hurt him. I mean, how can it not? I betrayed him.
I have to make myself get out of bed and get dressed to head over to the stadium. I know that if I procrastinate, I will talk myself out of going all together. I try to brace myself for her fury. I know she won’t be happy, but I can’t do this to Robert, or the team. I have to fix my mistake.
When I get downstairs, Elizabeth is waiting at the table for me. Somehow, she knows what I’m going to do today. She looks at me with a sadness that almost breaks me.
“Bailey, are you sure about this? I know how you feel about him, but are you sure you have to do it now? Can’t you wait just for a while, just until you tell Robert first? If she knows you are going against her, she can ruin everything for you. I just don’t want him to hear it from her and never hear you out. I know what you did was wrong but you had your reasons. He needs to know that. I don’t want him to just see you as a selfish person.” She looks as heartbroken as I feel over all this.
“Look, this is my mess, don’t stress yourself out. I will fix this, and if she does tell him what I did, that is my burden. I can hope he will let me explain and pray he understands. Although, if he doesn’t, I can’t say I would blame him. Elizabeth, I broke that trust, me, not anyone else. Yes, he will have every right to be pissed as hell at me.”
“Even with that being one possible outcome, I still have to do this so let me do it. I have too even if I am sc
ared. It has to be done. On the off chance she doesn’t tell Robert, I will have too. I can’t keep going on like this. I love him, Elizabeth, and right now, there is like this big black cloud of doom hanging over my head. I have to get rid of that if I plan to stay with him. He deserves that much from me. Just do me one favor, please don’t put yourself in the middle of this.”
Elizabeth walks across the room to hug me. I don’t realize how much I needed it, until she does it.
“I will always be in the middle of whatever involves you. You are my best friend, and I will always be here beside you when you need me.” With that, I walk out of the house trying to look as confident as I can.
I’ve been sitting here looking at the front of the stadium for the last hour. I have a feeling something isn’t right. I can’t put my finger on what is wrong and that makes me unnerved. No matter what I am feeling, I have to make myself get out of the car and do this before I talk myself out of it. So, I do just that. Looking in the mirror, I give myself one final pep talk, and then force myself to get out of the car and make my way to the front office of the team.
Walking across the parking lot, I notice there are a lot more cars than I thought there would be at this hour. I know from past conversations, Ronda gets here early, but I didn’t think everyone else would be here. With one last deep breath, I pull open the glass door and walk in.
At first, the size of the office is intimidating. It doesn’t help that the whole thing is made of glass and steel. It actually feels like something from the future. You can see Ronda’s influence all over the place from the pictures on the wall, to the ugly fabric covering the chairs. At the sleek looking reception desk, it is no surprise to find a blonde Barbie. You know, one of those girls that look like a professional does her hair and makeup every day while having a department store in their backyard. They’re also the ones I can see Robert leaving me for. With an eye roll, I walk up to her desk.
“Hi, I need to speak with Ms. Townsend please.” Secretary Barbie looks down and flips through her binder for a good five minutes. “I don’t see her having any appointments at the moment. Do you have one?”
“No, but…,” I start to respond, but she interrupts me.
“Well, if you don’t have an appointment, there is nothing I can do for you. Have a good day.”
Oh my God, I am about to lose it on Barbie when I hear Ronda’s voice behind me. “Ronda, I need to speak with you,” I say loud enough for her to hear me. When I start toward Ronda, I hear Barbie yelling at me to get back there or she will call security.
“Lady, security is the least of my worries at the moment,” I throw over my shoulder at her.
“Tracy, it’s fine. Can you hold my calls for a bit, please?” Ronda calls over to her while leading me into her office. “What are you doing here? What if someone saw you? How were you going to explain that?”
I open my mouth to tell her I’m done with her plan, but nothing will come out. This is going to be harder than I thought it was going to be.
“Well, are you going to say whatever was so damn important that you had to come in person? Which I still think is the dumbest move you have made to date. Here I thought maybe you had a bit of brains in that head of yours.” At her words, I see red.
“How dare you call me stupid. Look, I came here to tell you that I can’t do this anymore. I thought I could, and I was selfish. I didn’t think ahead when I said I could, and would, do this. I never thought I would care for him. I will help you find another way out, but I can’t do this. It is killing me. I will repay you every penny. Just stop trying to ruin the team. I am begging you. If you want me to get on my knees, I will.”
As I am finishing the last sentence, the door is thrown open, and my worst nightmare comes true. It’s even worse than Vincent coming for me and taking me back.
Robert is standing in the door with a look of pure fury and disgust on his face. I know then that he has heard every word I said. When he speaks, his voice has a hard edge to it.
“What the hell is going on here, Bailey?”
I rush to get to his side, but when I go to touch him, he pulls away from me like my touch might burn him.
“Bailey what did I just overhear? Tell me I misunderstood; that you of all people didn’t do that to me.”
Feeling like I am going to be sick, I try to explain, but I know that no matter what I say, it isn’t going to fix this. “Robert, I can explain if you let me. Please just listen to me.”
He pushes past me into the office. “How much does she owe you?” A smile spreads across Ronda’s face, even with Robert sounding like he is a breath away from snapping. She really is enjoying this way too much.
“Three thousand.”
With that, Robert pulls out his wallet and writes her a check. After handing her the check, he points to the door, “Now get out.”
Ronda leaves without even a backwards glance despite it being her office. After she leaves, the room is left silent, except for the sound of Robert’s breathing. I can’t take it anymore, and try once again to explain. “Robert please listen. You don’t understand.” With those words, I feel my would fall apart.
“Understand? Understand that you were being paid to date me. That while I was falling for you, I was a job. I must have looked like a fool to you and her. How many laughs did I give you, huh? God, Bailey, seriously, I can't believe you of all people would or could do this. I don’t want an excuse as to why. I don’t want to hear anything you have to say.”
“Right now, I wouldn’t believe a word that left your mouth. You’ve lied to me for so long now. I can’t trust you. When were you going to tell me that I was some pawn in your little game? Would I have ever known if I hadn’t had a meeting next door? Am I only finding out because I saw you and ran to catch up to you?”
By the end of his speech, he is next to Ronda’s desk. Before I can blink, a bottle flies across the room and explodes against the wall. At the sound of the bottle breaking, I’m thrown back into the past. Without any thought, I scream, “Vincent, stop please! I’m sorry!” I struggle to keep myself from getting pulled too deep into the memory.
I’m trying not to focus on the memory, but I see enough to know it was one of the times Vincent had thrown a plate at my head, only to have it shatter right by my ear because I had shifted.
“I’m not there; I’m not there. He isn’t him.” I scream at myself. It is slow work letting myself return to the present. After I come to myself, I find I’m crouched in a corner trying to protect myself. When I look up, Robert is standing there looking down at me. There is so much hurt and hatred in his eyes. The longer he looks something else creeps into his eyes, though, I’m not sure if it’s concern.
With a sigh, he turns and walks out of the door yelling over his shoulder. “I have to go. I will get the Jeep later.”
When Robert walks out the door, I fall to the floor. That couldn’t have just happened. Somehow, I find the strength to get up and make my way to his jeep. As I’m opening the door, I hear my name being called and turn toward the sound. Elizabeth is standing there with her arms open.
“Ok, what room is she in. I am going to kick her ass. I was afraid she would upset you.” At her words, I start to cry.
“Oh, honey, it will be ok.” I push away from her, trying to tell her my plan hadn’t worked out, and that Robert knew; that he’s the only one who could hurt me like this. But, I can’t even say Robert’s name.
“It wasn’t Ronda. He heard everything. I didn’t know he had a meeting today. He saw me going into the room and was rushing to catch up to me. I ruined everything.” When I finish, Elizabeth takes me to the passenger side and puts me in the car. In the back of my mind, I think maybe we should leave it here. I’m not sure if he wants me to even look at anything that belongs to him after what I did.
I let Elizabeth put me in the Jeep and buckle myself in out of habit. I feel like I’m running on auto pilot, and I just want to get out of there as fast as I c
an. I do my best to curl up into a ball and make myself as small as possible. I just lost the most important man in my life. I have to find a way to fix this, or at least get him to hear me out.
When we arrive home, I go straight to my room and crash on my bed. I must have fallen asleep for a few minutes because the next thing I know Elizabeth is busting in my door.
“I called work and told them we wouldn’t be in tonight. Dani said not to worry about it, that it should be a slow night. Now, what kind of ice cream do you want? I put in P.S. I Love you. At lease if we are watching that, I will be crying with you. I rock in the best friend department, even though I don’t have to remind you of that.”
“I know you want to wallow in your bed crying your heart out, but you must come downstairs so I can be supportive. You have ten minutes to be in your pajamas and downstairs. Do you hear me?”
I stay right where I was when she first entered the room. I don’t want to be the girl that falls apart because a guy leaves her. But, when he walked out on me, he took my heart with him. He would never believe that now, but it’s true. It has been less than an hour, already my world is darker, and I have no one to blame but myself. Whoever said it is better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all, was an idiot.
Why did I have to fall for that smile and those eyes? I have to find a way back to being me, even if I can never have his forgiveness. Then, I have to learn to move on. I think I will take one more day to wallow.
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Chapter Seventeen
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Elizabeth
I spent the whole night staring up at the ceiling. I couldn’t sleep, not with the sounds Bailey was making. I thought I had known true heartache, but I was wrong. I hope I never have to go through the pain Bailey is now.
I’m pulled from my thoughts by my phone ringing. Looking at the caller ID, I see it’s Sam checking in on us.
