by Zara Zenia
“It is,” I say with a nod.
It’s incredibly strange to be an alien on an alien world. But the strangest part of all is that I’m starting to like it here. Fiery sky, unbearable heat, and scaled beasts alike. If someone were to offer me the chance to go back to Earth right now, I’m not certain I’d take it. And when I look at Eva, her eyes wide with wonder and appreciation, I know I wouldn’t.
Chapter Thirty-Four
Eva
“We should probably head back,” Lucas says, his voice soft, gentle, but with an edge of something else in it. Worry perhaps? I know things don’t look good from down here. The Desergans look at us like we don’t belong, but specifically, they look at him like the monster he’s always saying he is. And I can’t help but remember how Brandt and Trylor first reacted to the vampires. They called them bloodsuckers and things. Even thinking about it now makes me angry and I know that’s not how my men look at each other anymore. But that’s how these villagers are looking at Lucas and I want to scream at them. To tell them that he’s more than that. He’s a kind, compassionate man full of hurt and sorrow and a desire to fix things. But they won’t see past what he is. I can already tell.
But then I follow his eyes through the smoldering mist in curling around the piecemeal walls and I realize it’s not how they’re looking at him that has Lucas wanting to turn back. Further beyond the reaches of the palace, the Desergans look haggard. They’re lining up in front of soldiers who are handing out rations, their expressions haunted and hopeless. My heart seizes at the sight of so much tragedy and then I see Lucas looking at me, his frown worried.
“I didn’t want you to see that,” he says, squeezing my hand.
I swallow, my heart in my throat, desperate to help these people out of their hard existence. It seems that once you move further away from the palace, all semblance that things are okay starts to fall apart. And now I understand why Trylor didn’t offer us tours. He already feels so much guilt about the plight of his people. Showing it to outsiders, acknowledging how bad it’s gotten, could only rub salt in the wounds.
But I’m happy that I’m here. I’m happy that Lucas failed to block it from me. Because now, suddenly, more than any other time, the stakes feel real to me. I saw the wolves kill my dad and Lucas’s village. And I even heard about the massacre here on Desergan. But those were all people who’d died. Tragic, yes, but there’s nothing I can do to change the past and what’s already done. But now, right before my eyes, there are people, living people, that could use my help. They could benefit from me creating this weapon — this child — to save them all.
I’m still not entirely convinced that it’s the answer. I’m not sure how much I believe in prophecies and fate and magical babies, but I know it’s the only path available to me if I want to help and I’m willing to give it a shot. These people need me to.
I shake my head, squeezing his hand back. “I’m glad I did,” I say, my voice more determined than it’s been since I got here.
Lucas turns to me, eyebrows up high in a silent question.
“We have to help them, Lucas,” I say, my throat tightening at the words. It’s all well and good to be strong in your mind, but as soon as I say it out loud, the emotion chokes me. They’re suffering right before me, sick, hungry, frightened, homeless… I can’t just turn my back on them and go back to the gilded palace and pretend none of it affects me. I just can’t.
“I’m afraid it’s beyond that,” he says, turning away, turning toward the palace. I take one last look at the poverty and loss of the Desergans before I join him.
“It’s not,” I say.
Lucas tilts his head to the side, waiting for me to continue. I’m sure he knows exactly what I’m saying. I’m sure he knows just where I’m going with this, but maybe he doesn’t want to presume. After how I reacted when they told me everything, I’m not surprised that he’s being extra careful with what he says around me. But he doesn’t need to be. Not anymore.
“Eva, you don’t have to…”
“I do. I want to. Especially if it’s with you,” I say, my voice warming up at the thought of it. Lucas was the first one I’d made a connection with in that shared vision and I still feel it between us, that strong, resilient strand tied between us, reeling us together at every chance.
“I’m happy to hear it,” he says, keeping his voice neutral.
That almost makes me question it. He does want this too, right? He wants me? Not just because of the prophecy? I know Lucas well enough to know that he’d go through with it regardless, but I want to know that he wants it as much as I do. That even though we’re being forced together, we’re both choosing to go through with it.
“Are you?”
He stops in the middle of the street, looking at me like I’ve just asked him the most insanely obvious question and all my doubts vanish.
“Yes. Absolutely, Eva. I’ve wanted nothing more since I met you, but I’m worried about why you’ve suddenly come around.”
I grin, rolling my eyes at him. “You do realize I’ve wanted you just as long, right?”
I’m pretty sure if a vampire was capable of blushing that Lucas would be blushing right now, but he just casts his eyes away, suddenly bashful.
“I’d hoped…”
“Well, I do, so stop worrying about it,” I say, starting off back toward the palace. “But there is something I’ve been curious about… I never got the chance to ask Morgan.”
“Yes?” he asks, a suspicious brow arched.
“You guys…you’re vampires like in the movies and stuff?”
He stiffens, his shoulders tightening. I wonder if I’m taking a step too far asking him about this, but I’ve been having dreams and I need to know if the things in my dreams are real.
“More or less. It depends on the movie. What are you asking?”
His voice is so guarded, like he’s worried I’m going to judge him or decide he’s really the monster he thinks and change my mind about being with him. But that’s not it at all. I’m just curious. The images running through my mind, replaying my dreams, are hot and I just… I want to know if it’s real. If it could happen like that.
“Do you…bite people?”
“I haven’t in a very long time,” he says, his voice still edged.
“Why not?”
“Because it’s barbaric and unnecessary. We mostly find a source of blood in the medical field so that no one has to be harmed or drained against their consent.”
I nod, swallowing thickly again, the words sticky as tar in my throat as I try to force them out.
“But what if… What if they did consent? What is it like?”
He stops again, his icy eyes boring into me. “Eva, I’m not going to—”
“Please just tell me, Lucas.”
He sighs, his head dropping forward before he seems to come to an agreement with himself and straightens up.
“It’s not unlike the connection when we shared a vision. Only instead of a scene, you’re simply sharing feelings and emotions. A lot of that is contained in a person’s blood. The vampiric venom makes the experience pleasurable for the victim, but it’s a superficial pleasure. Whatever was underneath that, whatever the person is truly feeling — panic, fear, loss — those are the emotions that come through the strongest. I always tried to only take what was necessary, but sometimes the emotions coming through were too strong and I…”
His voice breaks and he shakes his head.
“I’m sorry, I wasn’t trying to bring up painful memories,” I say, now feeling foolish for pushing the subject when he so clearly wanted to avoid it. Now I’ve hurt him and it was all just to know if my fantasies could be reality. How could I be so selfish?
“I know you weren’t,” he says warmly, his hand squeezing mine. I’d forgotten our hands were still linked until that firm reminder, but it does reassure me. “Unfortunately, those things are just part of being what I am. You can understand why I typically feel like a mons
ter.”
“But you’re not a monster, Lucas. Remember? I’ve been in your mind. I know what you’re really like. I know what’s inside you. And I know you’re not a monster.”
He gives me a tiny, sad smile and shakes his head. “There’s plenty you don’t know, but I appreciate that.”
We’re at the palace gates again now, and the sun is just beginning to lighten the horizon, a brilliant neon orange that’s almost hard to look at. I reach up, resting my palm against his face and lean up on my tiptoes to press a kiss to his lips.
“I mean it. I don’t think you’re a monster.”
He closes his eyes and leans into my palm, taking a deep breath that I know he doesn’t need. Then, his eyes open and he smiles, giving me a kiss too.
“How are you like this? How are you so sweet and understanding when I don’t deserve it?”
I shrug, chuckling. “I think you do.”
“You really are the one, Eva. There’s no doubt about that,” he says, sounding awed.
I’m actually starting to get a little sick of all this talk about being ‘the one’ and being a guardian and everything resting on me, but I know he’s not doing it on purpose. I know it’s just the facts. There’s no arguing with them, no changing them. And I’ve accepted it. I know what I have to do. I just don’t like be reminded all the time.
“Well, the one has a duty to fulfill,” I say, trying to make it sound sultry even though the words are clunky and awkward.
Lucas grins. “You just tell me when.”
“Come to me tonight. I’ll be ready for you tonight.”
“Until then,” he says with a nod and another kiss that sizzles all the way down to my toes.
I shiver and watch him walk into the palace, lingering behind in the grand gardens to watch the sunrise and plan for the night ahead.
Chapter Thirty-Five
Eva
Nighttime comes faster than I expected it. I’m still a bundle of nerves after my long soaking bath that was meant to relax me and I’m trembling as Stella helps me into the long silk dress. It’s so soft and smooth it might as well be liquid going over my skin, draping elegantly, hugging my curves in all the right ways. I didn’t tell Stella what I’m planning, but it seems like I don’t have to. She can tell at least that I’m trying to get dolled up for someone and she helps with my hair, making it fall in soft romantic waves that frame my face. When I look in the mirror, I don’t really recognize the girl staring back at me.
No longer am I some anti-social virgin from the woods. Now I look like some kind of sex goddess. Like I belong on the cover of a romance novel or something. The way the silk whispers against my skin lights up my nerve endings and makes me eager for Lucas to show up, but thinking about Lucas just brings back the nerves.
With everyone else, it was just kind of a spontaneous thing. It just happened. But planning it, anticipating it, waiting for it… Well, that makes things different. Somehow better, but also worse. Like waiting in the car of a roller coaster knowing it’s going to give you the ride of your life while being terrified at the same time. It’s pure adrenaline coursing through my veins.
“Thank you so much for the help, Stella,” I say, smoothing my hands over the silver silk covering my body. It hardly looks like fabric at all. It looks like moonlight wrapped around me. Before coming here, I never knew something this nice existed. And now it’s just a part of my wardrobe. That’s crazy, but I know that thinking about it is only another attempt by me to forget why I’m so nervous and who’s going to be showing up at my door any minute.
“Happy to, ma’am. You’ll be careful, won’t you?”
Her eyes are shimmering with concern and I realize that Stella still doesn’t fully trust the vampires. I understand why, but I feel the need to defend them.
“I will, but there’s no need to worry. Lucas is a wonderful, gentle man,” I say. “I know he’s not like those you’re used to, but he’s special to me.”
She nods, her lips firm in a thin line, but she doesn’t argue with me. She just dips her head and leaves me alone in my room.
As soon as she’s gone, I let out a deep breath I didn’t know I was holding. I’m finally alone with my own thoughts, but that’s kind of a terrifying place to be. As much as I want this with Lucas, and as much as I know we’re supposed to be together like this, I can’t help but be worried. What if they are wrong about the prophecy? What if nothing happens? What if I can’t get pregnant? What if I manage to ruin it all even while doing everything I’m supposed to?
A soft knock on my door breaks through those worries and stops me from spiraling out of control. My heart starts hammering, my hands going damp. He’s here. Lucas is here and we’re going to make love.
I’m grinning like a fool when I walk up to the door, tremors of anticipation tickling through my nerves, but as soon as my hand’s on the knob, I’m hit with a rush of insecurity and the smile fades and I’m biting my lip as I open the door, hoping he likes what’s waiting for him.
Without either of us saying so to the other, it seems we both decided to dress for the occasion. Lucas is wearing all black — slacks, a dress shirt, and a jacket that shows off his broad shoulders and lean body. He looks like a million bucks. Maybe even a billion, and I can’t stop myself from staring at him in wonder. This gorgeous man is here for me.
But he’s not moving. He’s frozen like a statue, his eyes unblinking as they travel up and down my body, the only part of him moving.
“Hi,” I whisper, my voice hardly more than a breath.
“Eva… You look incredible,” he says, his voice like lava in my veins.
The dress is open on the arms, and low cut in the front and back, just pooling on my body like it’s made for me, and the second I hear his voice, goosebumps break out all over my arms, a shiver running through me.
“You too,” I manage through my dry mouth. “Come in.” I step away from the door and he takes one long stride into the sitting room, just standing there as I close the door and turn the lock. I don’t want anyone bothering us.
And the moment the door is closed, I turn and find Lucas nearly pressed against me. He moves so silently and the lack of body heat coming off of him means that he’s able to sneak up on me and have his arms around me before I even know what’s happening.
He’s kissing me in an instant, deep, sensual kisses that leave me feeling like I’m drowning. There’s no urgency with Lucas. He’s slow and takes his time working me into a frenzy, pressing all my buttons until I’m panting under him, clawing at his jacket, desperate for more of him and he hasn’t even really touched me. His hands slide down over my hips, moving like there’s nothing between us over the silk. I didn’t expect to be this eager, to need him this badly so quickly, but I do. Once Lucas is touching me, I’m hooked. I need more. I need all of him.
He kisses down my neck and across my collarbone, plucking one of the thin straps over my shoulder so the dress falls on one side, revealing one of my breasts to the open air. A tiny gasp escapes me at the contact, but then it’s his lips making me gasp as they trail over my chest to the other side, flicking that strap over my shoulder too until the dress is pooled around my waist, only held up by my hips.
“I wish you could see how beautiful you are right now, Eva. Flushed with arousal like you are, panting at my touch. Absolutely gorgeous,” he says, his fingers gently manipulating my nipples, drawing out quiet, plaintive cries from me.
“Actually,” he says, his lips curling into a mischievous smile that goes straight to my clit, making it throb and pulse and beg for his touch. “Here,” he says, spinning me around so I’m facing the mirror I was looking in earlier.
Now I’m looking much more disheveled than I was then, and he’s not wrong — I am flushed, my face and chest attractively pink against the cream tone of my skin, my breasts heaving with heavy pants. But that’s not what I notice the most. What I notice is what I don’t see.
Lucas isn’t in the mirror.
> I whip my head around quickly, and let out a relieved breath to still see him there, his hands still roving over my body. Then I look back to the mirror in confusion until it finally dawns on me. Vampires. Of course.
“Just watch yourself, beautiful. There’s nothing better in all the worlds,” he says, kissing my neck from behind as he drags his hands down my hips, pulling the silk dress with them. I’m not wearing anything under the dress obviously, there’s no way I could without everything showing, so I opted to go without. And now I’m completely naked in the mirror, shivering at the sight, but so turned on I can’t even really think straight. I can feel his hands moving on me, but I can’t see where they’re going because I’m locked in my own gaze, practically compelled to obey his request.
His fingers slide over my thighs and then, with a jolt like lightning, he’s touching my sex, spreading my folds, teasing my aching clit. It’s strange and bizarre to watch myself be touched like this, by a hand I can’t see, knowing I’m being kissed by lips that aren’t there. It’s strange, obviously, but it’s also crazy hot and I can’t look away.
An invisible hand kneads my breast, twisting my nipple gently until I yelp and moan. I turn to kiss him, needing to taste him, needing more of him and while we’re kissing, I hear a zipper.
He turns my head back toward the mirror and I know what he wants without him saying it. I can feel his thick, hard length pressed against me from behind, but not being able to see it leaves me in this state of anticipation and need that might just break me.
“Please, Lucas,” I whisper, watching my own legs tremble in the mirror as his long finger circles my clit in slow, maddening circles. “Please.”
He’s at my entrance then, the tip of his cock pressing against me, my desire streaming out of me and coating him with my juices. I’ve never wanted anything as badly as I want him right now. Waiting for it and expecting it all day long did things to me I didn’t know possible and now it’s like everything feels ten times more intense.
