by Foley, E. G.
Not even Humbug, fast as he was, had much chance of getting away from the ice queen’s wooden army. The little elf dangled from the nutcracker’s grasp, with his painted-on white gloves.
Jake wondered if this was the welcome the elf had expected when he had decided to come here. What is this place, anyway?
He still had no idea what was going on.
The masked queen rose and glided toward them on razor-sharp ice skates. “So, spies. My grandfather sent you to check up on me, did he? Do you have anything to say for yourselves? Or shall I have my men torture it out of you?”
Red growled while Archie and the girls whispered to each other: “What? What is she talking about?”
“We’re not spies!” Jake told her.
“Aha! Exactly what I’d expect a spy to say,” she countered. “How else do you explain your lurking around the castle, then?”
“Please, ma’am, we’re lost. We haven’t the foggiest idea where we are,” Archie attempted, always the diplomatic one. “We’re sorry if we trespassed on your territory. We didn’t mean to. We just really need some shelter.”
“What, too cold for you out there today?” she drawled.
Jake took a step forward, bristling with anger. Everything in him warned that they needed to get out of there, but the prospect of going back outside was worse. “Look here, ma’am. We are not spies,” he told her firmly. “We are simply trying to reach the North Pole.”
“So you claim. And quit calling me ma’am. I’m not much older than you!” To their surprise, she whipped off her smooth, eerie carnival mask to reveal the face of a girl barely older than Isabelle.
Jake blinked, taken off guard by this revelation, and slightly confused for a moment about why the girl had been trying to seem so much scarier than she actually was.
He shook his head to clear it. “Look, whoever you are. I don’t know what that elf might have told you about us, but we are not spies—and he is not to be trusted! He’s a liar and a cheat. He nearly got us killed by yetis earlier tonight, simply as a distraction so he could escape.”
“Escape?” she echoed. She skated closer. “Ah, then you admit you were holding him prisoner?”
“So what if we were?” Jake retorted. “That elf’s got a bounty on his head. We’re returning him to Santa to collect the reward.”
“All lies!” Humbug cried, his little feet flailing as the nutcracker man held him fast. “They’re Santa’s agents sent here to spy on you, Your Highness! When I saw them lurking around the castle, I came here as fast as I could to warn you and your brother that you were once more under surveillance.”
The girl scoffed. “As if they’d dare send spies out on my brother. No, Humbug, you’ve worked for my family long enough to know my grandparents would never subject the prince to their nonsense. Precious Jackie-boy can do whatever he wants. It’s only me they subject to their constant rules and regulations—which is why I am never going back there!” She folded her arms over her chest.
“What prince? Who are you? What is this place?” Jake demanded.
“I’ll ask the questions here!” she warned him. “And believe me, I have plenty of them. But first, we come to the basic problem: Humbug says you’re spies, while you claim he’s a fugitive. So it’s your word against his, and frankly, I’m not sure I believe either one of you.”
“But Your Highness, I told you they would come!” the elf protested. “The spies were chasing me and now, here they are, just like I said! Please, dearest Snow Maiden, you know me.”
“I know you to be a bit of a rascal, Humbug,” she admitted.
“Please, Miss,” Dani spoke up in exhaustion, “do we really look like spies to you?”
The Snow Maiden stared at her, then looked at each of them in turn. “Well, if you are spies, you’re not very frightening, actually. Except maybe him.” She nodded dubiously at the Gryphon.
“Excuse me, but we just defeated three yetis out there,” Jake informed her, rather insulted by the remark. “Maybe we don’t seem like much at the moment, but that’s because we’re half frozen to death. Honestly! If you had any sort of decency, you’d offer us food and shelter. A fire to warm us? A place to rest would be nice! But if this is how you’re going to be, whoever you are, then we’ll take that lying elf off your hands and be on our way. Our business is with him and Santa Claus, not you.”
“Now, now, don’t be so touchy!” she exclaimed. “There’s no need to go dashing off in a huff. This is my castle—”
“Er, actually, it belongs to your brother, Snow Maiden,” Humbug pointed out.
Which earned him her glare.
“The point is, none of you are going anywhere until I am satisfied about who’s telling the truth here. However,” she conceded with a haughty lift of her chin, “I suppose there is something we can do about your other requests, if you’re going to whine about it. We may be a thousand miles from civilization, but we are not devoid of hospitality here in the arctic circle. Guards!” she bellowed. “Show them to the guestrooms.”
“How very kind,” Isabelle offered at once, trying to smooth things over.
“But separate them,” Snow Maiden ordered the giant toy soldiers. “If they are spies, let’s not give them a chance to talk amongst themselves and coordinate their lies.”
The toy soldier bowed, then beckoned stiffly with his wooden arm and started goose-stepping ahead of them toward the castle stairs.
She gestured to them to follow. “My servants will attend you,” she said.
“Thank you,” Jake said, feeling rather smug. He sketched a gentlemanly bow and Archie did the same; the girls curtsied.
The Snow Maiden smirked but stared after Jake as he led his friends out of the ice hall. “Perhaps you will be in a more pleasant mood after a meal and some rest. I do hope you come back prepared to explain yourselves. If not, there’s always the dungeon.”
The kids exchanged grim glances, still unsure if they were prisoners or guests in this strange place.
Then they and Red followed the giant toy soldier toward the castle’s main staircase. A second soldier followed after them, making sure nobody strayed.
Jake wondered how the tall wooden figures managed to stay upright on the staircase with their long, awkward steps. The stairs were slippery as well, crusted with a thin coat of ice.
Archie came over to Jake and leaned toward his ear. “Who the blazes is she?” he whispered.
Still irked at the girl, Jake shook his head. “Don’t know, don’t care, as long as she gives us some food and a warm fire. But I imagine we’ll find out soon enough.”
After they picked their way up the treacherous icy staircase, the toy soldiers marched them down the upstairs hallway.
The guard ahead of them opened the first door and waited for one of them to go in.
“Well? Who’s it going to be?” Archie murmured.
They glanced around anxiously at each other.
Being separated was the one thing none of them had counted on. It was so much easier to stay confident and figure out solutions when at least they had each other.
Dani looked up at the toy soldiers. “Can’t we please share a guestroom? You must have one with two large beds. One for the boys, one for us.”
The towering toy soldier’s painted eyes stared blankly. His big, round, smooth head rotated back and forth.
“At least let the girls stay together, with Red to protect them,” Jake insisted.
Denied. The toy soldier merely pointed to the chamber again.
Jake fumed. Not much for conversation, these blokes.
“Well, you’re going to have to wait while I at least make sure the room is safe for my friends.” He stepped past the guard into the room to see if it held any kind of threats against whichever one of them ended up staying in here. He did not trust that daft ice girl downstairs for one minute, especially after she had mentioned torture.
While the soldier goose-stepped over to the fireplace, took the brass kero
sene lighter off the mantel by its long handle, and used it to start a fire in the hearth, Jake scanned the room in suspicion.
He threw open the closet and even checked under the bed before he was satisfied.
He returned to the hallway, where Isabelle wore a look of concentration, her eyes closed. Jake realized she was using her gifts to try to sense any unseen threats inside the castle.
“Anything?” Jake asked as he joined her.
She opened her eyes and then shrugged. “Not from them.” She glanced discreetly at the toy soldiers. “They’re only following the Snow Maiden’s orders.”
“Who is she?” Jake whispered. “And who are her grandparents? She sure seems angry at them. She mentioned a brother, too. Jack, right? A prince of some sort, and she must be a princess. Humbug did call the girl ‘Your Highness.’ Any idea who these people are?”
The others shook their heads.
“Why did she think we were spies?” Dani whispered.
“Obviously, Humbug lied about us,” Jake answered in a low tone. “That must be why he was so keen to get here before us. I’ll bet he thought that if he beat us here, he could manipulate the situation and use her to get rid of us for once and for all. Then he could continue on his merry way to Halloween Town. But I daresay his little scheme hasn’t quite gone to plan, because she doesn’t seem inclined to let him or any of us leave.”
“Well, I’ve never heard of anyone called Snow Maiden,” Isabelle said discreetly. “But I can tell you she has very strong emotions. I can sense them all the way from here. Temperamental and rebellious, definitely spoiled. But I don’t sense that she’s evil. If we treat her carefully, I believe we should be all right.”
“Well, that’s reassuring,” Jake drawled. “What does she want from us?”
“I’m not sure she knows herself. All I can glean from her emotions is that she’s very lonely and extremely bored.”
“Great,” Jake muttered.
“Can’t say I blame her for that,” Archie said. “Living out here in a snowy wasteland, nothing but oversized toys and a few animals to talk to. Anyone could go slightly batty under such conditions.”
“Hmm.” Jake absorbed this skeptically.
“Well, if she’s going to give us food and shelter, we might as well accept it,” Dani said. “It’s better than freezing to death. And whoever she is, she can’t be worse than the yetis.”
“True,” Jake said.
“Right, then.” Archie stepped toward the doorway. “I’ll take this room,” he bravely volunteered. “Courage, all.”
“See you soon, I hope,” his sister said.
“Goodnight, Arch,” Jake said grimly.
Dani gave him a small wave. “Bye.”
Archie nodded goodnight to them, then the toy soldiers locked him in, ignoring Red’s low growl of protest.
One by one, each of them in turn was locked up in a comfortable guest chamber, with a fire to bring life back into their bones. Jake saw the girls safely into their rooms. The Gryphon took the next chamber. Jake went last, using the extra time in the hallway to scope out any possible escape route. He had a feeling they might need one in the future.
Unfortunately, he saw none—but he did witness a strange scene when the toy soldiers marched him across an upper balcony to his room.
The balcony overlooked the great hall, where the Snow Maiden was still toying with Humbug.
She beckoned to the nutcracker. “Bring him to me. Now then, Humbug. What are we going to do with you?”
“Let me go on my way to Halloween Town?” the elf suggested.
She laughed with crystalline gaiety. “Oh, I don’t think so! You don’t really want to work for that nasty old Jack O’Lantern fellow. You’re not cut out for that at all.”
“Yes, I am!”
“Nonsense. You’re not nearly terrifying enough. Have you ever even been to Halloween Town?”
“Once,” Humbug said. “I peeked in. Well, it might take some getting used to, but I know I will fit in there.”
She started laughing at him. “You’re such an amusing little fellow! I still don’t trust you, but you do make me laugh. And, after all, you were telling the truth about this much, at least: there were people following you, and they came here, just as you predicted. So, for that, and for your good intentions, trying to warn me about Santa’s spies, you deserve to be rewarded. How it would irritate my grandfather if I managed to turn one of his elves into my own servant. I know! I’ll make you my jester!”
“Your Highness, please, I want to be a goblin!” Humbug protested, but it was too late.
She tapped him with her icicle wand and a silver cloud of sparkling magic snow engulfed the elf.
When the whirling puff of magic cleared away, Humbug’s appearance was transformed.
His brown coat had turned white. His little breeches were pale silver, and instead of a pointy Christmas elf hat, he now wore a blue and silver jester’s cap with jingle bells on its several points.
He saw himself in the reflection of an icy mirror across from the Snow Maiden’s throne and looked appalled at his makeover.
The Snow Maiden clapped her hands in delight. “Much better! Now you’re a proper jester. Go on, make me laugh.”
The grumpy elf just stared at her, at a loss.
Jake raised an eyebrow as he watched.
Poor Humbug seemed to be asking himself in that moment if running away from Santa had been the best idea.
The Maiden’s pretty face took on a glower. She folded her arms across her chest. “I said, make me laugh.”
“Oh dear.” Humbug sighed.
Jake’s humor at the little trickster’s expense was short-lived, however. The toy soldier prodded him in the back with the blunt end of his lance, shoving him into the guestroom.
“Watch it!” he shot back, whirling around after he caught himself from stumbling.
The tall, blank-eyed soldier slammed the door in his face.
Jake heard it lock and forced himself to check his temper. Blast it, what are we going to do?
He had a bad feeling about this place, but even if they could escape, only darkness, subzero temperatures, and bloodthirsty yetis awaited them outside. Without Humbug, they still did not know the way to Santa’s. There was no help for it.
They were stuck for now.
Captives of the ice princess.
CHAPTER TWELVE
Chilling with the Ice Princess
Butlers and waiters across the civilized world wore black and white tuxedoes as their uniform; therefore, the children were only marginally surprised when the Snow Maiden’s servants turned out to be funny little penguins.
Jake could not imagine who had trained them, but they were surprisingly efficient, carrying in his meal on silver trays, skating around easily on their little yellow feet when it came time to clear away the dishes.
Better still, Isabelle was able to communicate with them, thanks to her telepathic gifts, which worked especially well on animals. She reported everything the penguins had told her when they were reunited three hours later, summoned from their rooms for an audience with the bored Snow Maiden.
“You’re not going to believe this,” Isabelle whispered as they gathered at the top of the slippery castle stairs, still groggy from their naps. “She’s Santa Claus’s granddaughter.”
“What?” they exclaimed in hushed tones.
“Santa and Mrs. Claus have a granddaughter?”
“And a grandson!” Isabelle nodded emphatically. “Jack Frost! That’s the prince Humbug mentioned. This is his castle!”
“You have got to be joking,” Jake said.
But Dani started laughing in delight.
Archie furrowed his brow. “No wonder that girl’s so spoiled, then. Santa’s granddaughter? She probably got everything she ever asked for, year round.”
“Until lately,” Isabelle said, beckoning them closer. “Turns out Snow Maiden always helped her Grandfather Frost deliver toys, especially
across Russia and Eastern Europe. She’s very famous in those parts.”
“Gigantic country, Russia,” Archie mused aloud. “A lot of ground to cover. I should think Santa could use a little help there.”
“Right, and she was always happy to help him deliver toys when she was little,” Isabelle said. “But according to the penguins, now that she’s growing up, she wants no part of Christmas anymore.”
“Santa’s own granddaughter doesn’t like Christmas?” Dani exclaimed.
Isabelle shrugged. “I’m not sure exactly what the penguins meant by this, but they said that these days, the Snow Maiden’s too cool for Christmas.”
“Too cool…?” Archie echoed with a look of confusion. “As in temperature?”
“I don’t know. Apparently that’s some sort of slang term in the local dialect or something.”
“Hmm.” Archie tilted his head. “One of my anthropologist friends in the Royal Society once told me that Eskimos, or should I say the Inuit people, who live in these latitudes, have fifty words for snow. Maybe this ‘cool’ comes from them. But who knows?”
Dani shook her head. “I’m still in shock to hear that Santa’s own granddaughter doesn’t like Christmas.”
“The penguins said she’s bored of it, and jealous of all the care and attention Santa gives to everybody else when Christmas comes,” Isabelle reported. “She’s been undermining him a lot in recent years, but the penguins said the last straw came earlier this autumn, when the Snow Maiden switched a bunch of names between the Nice and Naughty lists just for fun.”
Jake chortled. “Nice prank.”
“Santa didn’t think so, with Christmas right around the corner. They got into a great family row.”
“Well, the holidays can have that effect on families,” Archie said. “It’s a shame.”
“Anyway, she stormed out—she lived with her grandparents, from what I understand. But she told them she was leaving to start her own winter holiday with no Christmas trappings, no carols, no Christmas trees, no nothing.”
“That’s absurd,” Archie said.
