Burying my hands in my pockets, I strode towards the bar, conscious of the eyes tracking my every move. As unsettling as it was, it was inevitable. I was the new guy. A stranger in their midst. No denying it. No escaping it. I was the new guy and I was on their turf.
Slipping onto the stool in the middle of the dinged wooden bar that had definitely seen better days, the waitress, a small lady old enough to be my mother, signalled in my direction and I nodded with a smile. A moment later, she was standing before me.
“Hey there. What can I get you, love?”
She was everything I’d ever imagined a small town barmaid to be. Polite. Friendly. Approachable. Plain. She wore her dark hair pulled back in a vicious ponytail, the end flirting with the collar of her black polo shirt. Her jeans were tight but not indecently so, and she finished her outfit with a pair of sensible black boots. With very little makeup, the fluorescent lighting did nothing to enhance her features.
“I’ll just take a rum and Coke, thanks. Extra ice.”
A moment later a glass was set down in front of me and I took a long swig. As it went down, I finally relaxed. It had been one long ass day, and from the state of that dump I was now the not-so-proud owner of, tomorrow would be even longer.
“Anything else?”
“You got a menu I can take a look at?”
“Sure.”
She slid the menu towards me but I was afraid to touch it. It looked like too much handling could result in it falling to pieces. Flipping open the once black cover, I wasn’t surprised by my choices. Filled with the standard deep fried entrée options, steaks served with chips and salad, battered fish, and chicken schnitzel.
“Can I please grab a rump steak, medium rare, with chips, salad, and mushroom sauce?”
“Sure thing.”
After ordering another drink, I handed over some cash, took the plastic table number she handed me, and headed towards the booth in the corner. Although I’d expected people to look at me, even though I was used to it, it didn’t mean I liked it. Not one bit. Especially not when I was about to stuff my face like a pig who hadn’t seen food in the past six months.
Feeling self-conscious, I grabbed my phone from my pocket and started scrolling. My old life, my old friends suddenly felt like they were a million miles away. It wasn’t their doing though, it was mine. When life fell to shit, I’d done everything I could to cut them out, and now I’d moved away, leaving them behind. I didn’t really have a choice though. I needed a fresh start. Now if I could just make that happen. After losing ten minutes checking through the latest news, the decision was easy. This wasn’t a life I wanted to be a part of anymore. Without pausing to reconsider, I deactivated my account and buried my phone in my pocket.
As I sighed with relief, I looked up and came face to face with the most captivating sapphire eyes I’d ever seen. They were so deep and dark I knew staring at them for any length of time would most definitely result in me drowning. Shaking the thought away, I took in the rest of the woman in front of me. She was pretty in an ordinary way. She wore barely any makeup, a black polo shirt which pulled across her impressive rack, her dark hair was pulled back in a low ponytail, and her jeans fit her perfectly. They weren’t those skinny jeans which often left the top of their panties showing, but the way they hugged her legs was definitely working for me. Before I had a chance to redirect my errant thoughts, my own jeans were beginning to feel uncomfortably tight.
“Medium rare with chips and salad?” she asked, her voice raspy and sexy as hell. I couldn’t help but wonder what she’d sound like with my name dripping from her tongue as she fell over the edge with pleasure.
“Thanks.”
She set the plate in front of me and my stomach growled. Thankfully the massive plate was piled high with steaming hot chips and a thick, juicy steak. It was exactly what I needed.
“Can I get you anything else?”
“Tomato sauce, if you have it?” I didn’t actually want sauce. In fact, I hated it. I don’t know why, but I didn’t want her to go just yet.
“Back in a second.”
She spun on her heel and stomped away, her delectable ass swaying as she went. I could tell by the way she moved that she wasn’t playing games. She wasn’t one to exaggerate the sway of her hips that my fingers were itching to dig into, it was just who she was. It was a good thing I was already sitting. Finding a sexy woman who wasn’t playing games, a woman who was real, was like spotting Big Foot playing poker with the Loch Ness monster.
Taking the opportunity, I adjusted myself before stuffing a chip in my mouth. It was hot and crunchy and delicious, even if it did burn my tongue.
“Here you go,” she said, dropping a bottle on my table.
“Thanks.”
Before I had a chance to say anything more, she was gone again, winding her way through the maze of tables back towards the bar. Tucking into my meal, I kept tabs on her from the corner of my eye, I don’t know why. I didn’t come here to get caught up in drama, and women were inevitably drama. Drama I didn’t have time for. Drama I didn’t need.
Soon enough I was completely stuffed, yet my plate was barely half empty. They definitely didn’t skimp on the servings here. I knew I’d be back. And not just for the food.
A shadow loomed over me, “Can I take your plate?”
It wasn’t the young one with the ass to die for. Disappointment flooded me and floored me in the same moment. It was scary as hell. “Thanks.”
“Was everything okay?” her voice wavered as she eyed off the pile of food still on my plate.
“Yeah, it was great.” My voice was unenthusiastic. Maybe I was just tired.
“Can I get you anything else?”
As tempting as it was to get her sidekick’s name, I reminded myself I wasn’t here for that. Besides, I had a big day tomorrow and I still had to find somewhere to crash tonight. “I’m good, thanks. But do you know of a half decent motel around here?”
“You just passing through?”
“Just need a room for the night.”
“Depends what you’re after. There’s a B&B about ten minutes from here. Or there’s rooms above the pub.”
I didn’t have to think on that one. B&B’s were for cosy, romantic weekends away, not for me. “The pub’s fine. Can you give me directions?”
Without a word, she pulled out a tattered notepad and drew me a crude map before tearing the page off and handing it over. “Just tell them Jenna sent you. You’ll be fine.”
“Thanks, Jenna. It was good to meet you,” I replied honestly, surprising even myself. As I shrugged my jacket back on, I figured I might as well tell her my name. She’d find out soon enough anyway. “I’m Nathan.”
Sticking her hand out between us, I took it and shook it. She shocked me with her tight grip. Jenna gave me the impression she was not a woman who tolerated idiots. “Good to meet you, Nathan. Have a nice night.”
“You too, Jenna. You too.”
Dropping her hand, I headed for the door, unable to stop myself from turning back and catching the gaze of the girl with the soulful eyes while she absentmindedly polished glasses. With a slight nod, I fished the keys from my pocket and made my out the door into the night.
Forty minutes later, I clicked off the ugliest lamp ever seen by man and flopped back on what I was sure was a bug infested bed and closed my eyes. Tomorrow was going to be a long ass day. The truck was due at ten and I had to have somewhere clean to put my crap when they arrived. Right now, there wasn’t an inch of that house I wanted to be in, let alone put my crap in.
The stupid alarm blasted me awake before the sun was even up. I needed coffee. Stat. In massive quantities, if possible. The thought flickered through my mind of coffee in an IV bag. Now that would be a million dollar invention. After a scalding hot shower, I grabbed my stuff and headed out. The sooner I got started the sooner it would be over. At least that was what I was praying for. Climbing on my bike, the engine roared and it was music to my ea
rs. The noise alone had a strange way of calming me. Tearing down the deserted main street, there was no sign of life. Not a single person was visible. Which also meant there was nowhere open to fuel my caffeine addiction. Grumbling into my helmet, I bit my tongue and headed to my rat-infested dump.
Turning the corner, as soon as I saw it I knew why I’d bought it. Even despite the peeling white paint, the overgrown hedges, the tumbledown fence, and the knee high grass, it was still beautiful. It was one of those old houses, probably almost eighty years old, and looked every day of those long, hard years, but it had character. An abundance of it. As much as I wanted to get in and restore the outside to its former glory, first things first. First I had to make it inhabitable.
Pulling into the driveway, I killed the ignition and pushed the bike towards the house. The wooden deck that ran the entire length of the back of the house had seen better days, so I had no hesitation of pushing the bike up under the cover. At least there I knew she’d be safe from the removalists when they eventually arrived. No one, and I mean no one, touched my baby. Not ever.
Opening the back door that I hadn’t even bothered to lock, the odour was worse than the day before. I don’t know how that was even possible, but it made me want to gag. Taking a breath, I got busy.
Time escaped me. When my phone rang in my pocket, I was staggered to see it was already quarter to ten.
“Hello?”
“Mr. Mitchell?”
“Yep. This is Nathan.”
“Hi. It’s Robert from Star Removals.”
“What can I do for you, Robert?” I could sense the bad news coming. They wouldn’t be ringing if they were on schedule.
“There’s been a bit of a delay. There was an accident on the highway and it’s been closed. Pretty bad, from what I understand.”
Frustrated, I didn’t even bother to hide it. “How long, Robert?”
“We’re running about four hours behind.”
“So I’m not expecting you any minute, but…” I looked at my watch and groaned. “You’ll be here around two?”
“At this stage.”
“What do you mean, at this stage? I paid the additional fees for guaranteed delivery. I expect my furniture here. Today.”
I heard him huff down the phone. His customer service was bullshit. “I understand that, Mr. Mitchell. We anticipate between two and three this afternoon, unless any other unforeseen and unavoidable circumstances arise.”
“Just get here,” I pretty much growled as I disconnected the call. “Fuck it all!” I threw the phone across the room, only satisfied by the crunching sound as it crashed to the tiles.
Without pausing, I was back on my bike and headed to the store. I needed cleaning supplies. And coffee. Lots and lots of coffee.
Chapter 3
Josie
Regret. Total and complete regret flooded my body. Last night had been almost fun. Even though it was work, I’d had the opportunity to talk to people other than Mia and Derek. As much as I loved my sister and her fiancé, there were only so many nights I could sit on the couch beside them while they sucked face through episode after episode of Big Bang Theory. It hadn’t been hard work, but right now my feet were protesting. Angrily.
Matilda screamed, so I put my mug on the counter and headed towards her room. Mia was a saint. She’d taken the early shift and got up with Matilda around five, fed and changed her, then played with her until I’d surfaced. It was after nine when I shuffled out to the lounge room and found them rolling around on the floor. Matilda was stacking blocks, then knocking them over, only to dissolve into a fit of giggles. The smile on Mia’s face was so alive I hated to break up their party. For a moment, barely a breath in time, I leaned against the wall and remained silent, watching them.
The moment Matilda spotted me, the spell was broken. Instantly on hands and knees, she crawled towards me as fast as her tiny body could move her. Her smile lit up my heart. She made my tired, aching body suddenly not feel so bad.
“Hey Munchkin.” I bent down and scooped her into my arms, which earned me a squeal of delight. “Thanks for looking after her last night.”
“Any time,” Mia assured me, as she tossed the abandoned blocks back in the purple bucket in the corner. “So, how’d it go? Think you’ll go back?”
I shifted Matilda in my arms; she was the most wiggly child I’d ever met. She never sat still. Even when she was sleeping she was squirming. It was common for me to put her down for a nap and when I went to get her barely half an hour later, she was completely turned upside down with the blankets tangled and her foot caught between the rails. More than once I’d worried about her getting so tangled she couldn’t breathe or move, but so far I’d been lucky.
“It was good. I mean, it wasn’t anything life changing, but it was good to just get out. I mean, don’t get me wrong, I love this little snot ball, but…”
“I get it, Josie. You don’t have to justify yourself to me. I’m glad. You need to get out of the house. Be something other than Matilda’s mum occasionally.”
“W-what are you saying?” I felt my spine straighten. I didn’t know what Mia was getting at, but whatever it was, I didn’t want to hear it.
Mia stood up, obviously sensing a fight. Running her hands over her face, she backed down quickly. “Josie, you’re an amazing mother. And that little girl is extremely lucky to have you. But there’s more to you than just being her mum. She needs you to be the best version of yourself. She deserves that. You deserve that.”
“Oh.”
“Thanks.” I felt like a bitch. I hadn’t been expecting that. “How was she?”
“She was Matilda.”
I laughed and it felt good. Everything felt a little lighter, like the dark cloud that had been circling overhead had lifted.
It was late January and it was hot. Too hot. Even with the air conditioning running at full blast, the air still felt heavy, and I was sweating like a pig. There wasn’t a breath of wind. It was still and stifling. Matilda was whinging and wouldn’t go down for her nap. Not that I could blame her. The moment my back touched the lounge, my sticky skin clung to the leather.
“Let’s fill up the tubs with water and stick our feet in,” Mia suggested eagerly as she dragged two huge plastic containers through the living room and out the back door.
Scooping Matilda up from the tiles where she was playing with a tea towel on her head, I carried her outside, where Mia was already filling the tubs under the shade of the overgrown gum tree in the corner of the yard. Finally catching on to her idea, I set Matilda down and watched for a second as she crawled happily across the burnt brown grass towards Mia. Grabbing two green plastic chairs, I carried them across the yard and put them beside the tubs before turning on my heel and heading back inside to get the pièce de résistance.
Grabbing a hat and some sunscreen for Matilda, as well as a couple of towels, I was just about to head back out when a squeal penetrated the silence and shot straight to my heart. Dropping everything, I sprinted through the house and out the door, managing to bash the point of my elbow into the solid wooden frame. Barely pausing, I let the list of expletives fall from my mouth as I crossed the yard as quickly as I could.
“You’ve got to be kidding me?” I huffed when I stepped beside Mia, my hands propped on my hips, my heart still racing at a million miles an hour.
Glancing down, I spied my daughter with the cheekiest smirk plastered across her adorable face and her eyes alight with mischief. Mia had filled one of the tubs a third of the way, stripped off Matilda, and set her down in the cool, clear water. There she sat, naked as a jay bird, splashing happily in the shade of the tree.
Mia just looked over at me and shrugged. “What?”
“Seriously?”
For a few moments I watched while Mia squatted down and played in the water like she was a kid. She looked so happy. In her element. The grin on Mia’s face made her look years younger than her birth certificate revealed. This was exactly w
here she was supposed to be. The life she deserved. The life she’d never have. The errant thought tore through me like a runaway freight train. Sometimes I forgot about Mia’s troubles, I was so absorbed in my own life. Then others, moments like right now, it was so glaringly obvious that it physically hurt. I don’t know how she did it. Got out of bed each day. Kept going. Kept believing that somehow it would be okay. That it would turn out all right in the end. That she could be happy. She was a fucking inspiration and she broke my heart. Wiping the stray tear from my cheek, I turned and headed back to the house. I needed a few minutes. And I knew there were no better hands in the world to leave my daughter in.
Forty minutes later, Mia and I had settled back in our chairs, Matilda was dressed in just a nappy as she crawled around the grass, grabbing at everything that wasn’t nailed down. We had our feet buried in a tub of water, sunglasses on, and a cool beer in our hand.
“Well, well, well. Obviously this is where the party is,” Derek taunted as he strode arrogantly across the lawn.
He had swagger. It was undeniable. He was dressed head to toe in his blue uniform, aviators settled over his eyes and holster at his hip. I felt the shiver pass through my body when my eyes settled on it. I didn’t know why it unsettled me. It pissed me off that it did. I saw him pretty much dressed like this every day, but every damn day there it was. Irrefutable and completely annoying.
“Come to join us?” Mia smiled up at him, hope brimming from her wide smile.
She was just as in love with Derek today as she was the first moment she’d seen him. Sure, her instant infatuation had deepened, but the lust was still there. If anything, it was more intense than ever. Trust me, I heard it. Every. Single. Night.
Believing Again (Finding Your Place Book 3) Page 2
