“Give me what I want and I’ll give you everything,” he says, his voice husky and low.
My eyes flutter open and I look at him wide-eyed. “You already have what you want,” I say breathily.
Nick shakes his head, a slow grin spreading over his face, his eyes twinkling despite the obvious need in them. He bites down on his lower lip and moans deeply when I move again, closer to him, letting him feel how wet I am.
“I know I do. I wanna hear you say it,” he responds, dipping his head and taking my lips in his and kissing me slowly. “Tell me you’re mine,” he says, his voice a strained whisper. “Tell me that this-,” he says, fully sliding his cock into me, the fullness it provides making my legs shake uncontrollably. “Is mine,” he says as he thrusts deeply in and out before pulling out again and leaving me empty. I can’t take it anymore. I begin to cry.
“Please,” I whimper. “Please, Nick. I’m yours!” I say, my voice trembling.
He lets go of my ass and places both of his hands beside my head, hovering over me, his ocean eyes searching mine before he finally gives in, bringing his mouth down to mine at the same moment that his cock fills me. His thrusts are rigorous and I feel my insides burn as he brings me to the brink within seconds, clenching around him and crying out as my climax washes over me.
“That’s right, baby,” he whispers, his breath hot against my ear. “Mine.”
He grabs my bottom again and positions me off of the bed as he continues to wildly drive into me, groaning with each thrust. I scratch his back, begging him for more, and he moves faster, deeper, harder, crying out my name as he spills pieces of himself inside of me.
The feel of feather light kisses over my shoulder awake me and I smile knowing whose lips are placing them there.
“Good morning, beautiful,” Nick murmurs against my skin.
“Good morning,” I respond, my voice raspy with sleep.
“Do you want to do something fun and touristy today?” he asks.
Turning my body to face him, I hook my leg around his hip and look up at him, smiling. It should be illegal for somebody to look this good when they first wake up in the morning. I bury my face in the crook of his neck and breathe him in. He even smells fresh, despite how sweaty we got last night. He chuckles when I snuggle my face deeper against him, and I smile at the sound of it.
“You even laugh sexy,” I comment, my voice sounding muffled against his neck.
He runs his fingers along the curve of my body, slowly downward and back up, repeating the movement languidly. “Is that a yes, Nick, I’ll do touristy things with you? A no way, Nick, I just want to stay here and let you fuck me senseless all day. Or a yes, Nick, I’ll do anything you want me to,” he says, his hand traveling down the valley of my waist and parting my legs. He glides his fingers between my thighs and begins to tease me, making me moan. “Hmmm … I think I’ll take that as a ‘yes, Nick, I’ll do anything you want me to’ then,” he mutters.
There’s a question in his voice that makes me swallow and nod slightly.
“Should I do anything I want with you?” he teases, inserting his fingers inside me and pulling them out, repeating the action slowly and making me bite down on my lip. My eyes flutter open when he stops suddenly, and I find his face hovering over mine, his eyes blazing. “Should I?” he asks, repeating his previous question.
“Yes, please,” I breathe, my body bowing off of the bed at the feel of his fingers back inside of me as his lips tease my nipples.
After Nick makes good on his word, we shower together and get dressed. He keeps telling me we should do touristy things, but I don’t know what I want to do. I don’t really want to go on the Alcatraz Tour. As much as I’ve wanted to do that I don’t think I’m ready for it. If I’m going to do it with anybody, I definitely want it to be with Nick, though.
“Let’s take a cable car,” he suggests, so we do. I’ve actually been on them before, so it’s not a new experience, but it feels brand new being on one with Nick. We hold onto the bars and make out as he hangs from it as if he’s going to let go and fall into the street. We go up to the Coit Tower and get a view of the city from the top of it, which is spectacular. And then go grocery shopping when Nick suggests a picnic in Golden Gate Park. It’s nothing major, the picnic. We get sandwiches and wine and sit outside, enjoying the sun and nice breeze outside.
“We could’ve gone to a good seafood restaurant,” Nick says, lying back on the cheap striped towel we bought in the pharmacy on our walk over.
As I take the last sip of my wine, I tilt my head to look at him, my eyes wide with shock. “Are you kidding? This is the most fun I’ve had …” I frown, thinking about the answer to that, even though there’s not much to think about. This is the most fun I’ve had—ever.
Nick smiles sheepishly, grabbing my arm and pulling me down to lay with him. “I didn’t think you usually do things like this,” he says, his lips on my forehead as he tugs on the ends of my hair lightly.
“I don’t,” I respond, closing my eyes to bask in this feeling of satisfaction. I’ve never felt this content with anybody in my life, other than Ryan, and even that was different.
“Have any of your boyfriends ever taken you on a picnic?” Nick asks, even though I pretty much just said I’ve never done this.
I scoff. “You’re joking, right?” I ask. Shifting my body to look at his face, I place my palm on his chest and lean up.
“Is this your first picnic?” he asks, his eyes twinkling with contentment.
I twist my lips, trying not to smile. “Maybe.”
“Maybe?” he asks playfully, sitting up to tickle me. I squirm away from him, laughing.
“It is,” I say, laughing and blocking his hands from my ribs.
“Hmm,” he comments, his body covering mine. His arms are on either side of my head now and he’s looking down on me with those intense eyes.
“Sea foam green,” I blurt out quietly.
He frowns.
“Your eyes, they’re sea foam green today,” I explain.
Nick shakes his head with a chuckle and dips his mouth to mine, running his tongue along the seam of my lips for me to part, and I do, welcoming him. He breaks the kiss but continues sucking alongside my mouth and lips, making me feel like my heart is going to detonate in my chest at any moment.
“You’re so adorable,” he says, smiling when he’s finished devouring my mouth. He lies back down beside me, propping his head on his hand. “So no boyfriend picnics, that’s good. I’m glad I can give you something you’ve never had with anyone before. Especially here.”
I smile, grateful he knows how much it means to me to make nice memories in a city that’s felt haunted for me. “Thank you,” I say, leaning in to kiss his bicep where he has his Wilde tattoo scripted. I want to tell him he’s given me a lot of things I’ve never had before already, but I lean into him with a smile instead.
Nick stands and helps me up and we start picking up the things we brought. He puts his arm around my shoulder and holds my hand there. The way he always holds my hands makes me smile, as if he doesn’t want me to get away from him or he can’t get enough of touching me. I love it.
I’m pointing at the Coit Tower, telling him how different it looks from down here and frown when he doesn’t answer me. When I look over at him, he’s staring at my lips as if he hasn’t heard a word I’ve said. I’m about to reprimand him for not paying attention, but he cups his hand behind my neck and pulls my mouth to his, kissing me until I can’t see straight. All I can think about is how fast my heart is beating and how my stomach feels like I have exploding pop rocks in it. The way he makes me feel scares me. The way I think I would feel without him scares me more.
“How old did you say Melody was?” Nick asks when I stop in front of an American Girl store.
“Four,” I say, smiling proudly.
He smiles back. “That’s a cute age.”
“It is.”
“My friend has a son that’
s five, he’s cute. I don’t see him often but when I do it’s always a fun time,” he says.
“When was the last time you saw him?”
Nick shrugs. “Couple of months ago when I went to his birthday party.”
“Cute,” I say with a smile, trying to picture Nick at a kids’ birthday party.
“What was the theme?”
“Pirates,” he says, his eyes twinkling as he looks down toward my feet.
I laugh and fish through my purse until I find one of the coins Melody gave me. I take one out proudly to show him, as if it was a lost treasure that I found. He frowns and laughs when he realizes what it is.
“Those were at the party,” he says.
“Of course they were,” I say, matter of fact. “Golden Doubloons. You can’t have a pirate party without them.”
Nick drops my hand and turns his body to mine and I mimic his movement.
“What?” I ask curiously.
“Do you want kids?” he asks.
I raise an eyebrow. “Isn’t it a little too soon for you to ask me that?” I joke.
Nick raises an eyebrow back at me as he walks forward, moving me until my back is on the glass of the store. “You think so?” he asks, his voice low as his eyes flicker between my eyes and my lips, effectively making my stomach coil. When he does that I just want to pull him to me and beg him to kiss me.
I nod my head slowly, breathing heavily now. “Yes,” I whisper.
“Let’s go over the things you think it’s too soon to talk about then,” he suggests, his mouth dangerously close to mine. “Kids?” I nod. “Moving in together?” I nod. “Marriage?” My stomach flops in excitement when he says that, and I nod. A smile tugs his lips. “Hmm … so I assume you’re on the pill,” he says, making me frown and my eyes widen in realization.
“Yes,” I whisper, wondering why he didn’t ask me this before.
“It doesn’t matter to me,” he says, his voice a whisper against my lips, so close yet so far.
“Why not?” I ask, my heart strumming loudly against my chest.
He smiles against me. “We can’t talk about that,” he says.
I close my eyes and bite down on my lip. He totally got me. When I flick my tongue out to wet my lips, it hits Nick’s and he groans, grabbing my face and finally kissing me. When he’s made sure that we’re both breathing heavily and can’t take the lack of oxygen, he lets me go and we continue walking.
“Charlotte,” I murmur, looking at one of the dolls on the storefront. “That’s a nice name.”
I always notice names. I think because mine is uncommon, I’ve always been slightly intrigued by the more “normal” names. Not that it matters, I’m sure I’ll end up naming my kids weird names anyway when the day comes.
Nick tilts his head and smiles. “What other names do you like?”
“Hmmm … for a boy I like Jorel,” I say.
Nick stops walking and makes a face that makes me laugh.
“What? You don’t like it?” I ask, laughing.
“It sounds like a cleaning product,” he comments.
“It does not!” I say, slapping his shoulder playfully. “I bet Isaac would like it.”
Isaac is into comic books, much like Hendrix, and I know for a fact that Superman’s dad’s name is Jorel.
Nick scoffs. “Isaac’s a nerd. And yeah, it does sound like a cleaning product.” He adds, mimicking a female voice, “You have a stain on your shirt? Oh, spray some Jorel on that, it’ll take it right off.”
I laugh at his impersonation and the face he makes as he says it then put my hand in his again as we continue walking.
It does sound like a cleaning product. Damn him.
I’ve had so much fun with Nick that I haven’t given much thought about Shea’s performance last night, but when I do, my heart breaks a little.
I’m stirred awake from our nap by pounding on our door, followed by shouts from Shea calling out my name. Nick stirs beneath me, muttering for him to shut the fuck up, and pulls me into his chest again, cradling my head on him as if he were carrying a baby. Placing a kiss over his heart, I untangle myself from him and sit up.
“Don’t go,” Nick groans sleepily.
“I have to,” I respond, brushing my lips against his. “I’ll be back soon.”
He turns over in the bed as I get up to look for something to wear. I pull on a pair of sweats that I brought just in case I decided to work out and a loose T-shirt over my head. Pulling my hair up into a ponytail, I make my way toward the door.
“Brooklyn, please open the door,” Shea says as he pounds on it once more.
Rolling my eyes, I open it and stand beside it as he walks in. He’s wearing a black T-shirt, camouflage cargo shorts and Jordan flip-flops. He walks to the couch and plops down on it, ruffling his hair nervously without looking at me. Assuming he’s not going to leave any time soon, I let the door shut close and make my way over to him, crossing my legs as I sit on the couch across from him.
He lets out a breath, wiping his face roughly with both of his hands and looks at me, his muddy green eyes no longer glazed over with intoxication. “I’m so fucking sorry, Bee,” he says, swallowing loudly.
I shake my head, biting the inside of my cheek to contain the emotion that’s threatening to come back. “That was an asshole thing to do,” I whisper brokenly. “And you know what, Shea? I don’t even fucking care that you hurt me like that. But what about Nick? Did you ever care to stop and think about what he might have been feeling? He’s your friend too.”
Shea narrows his eyes at me. “Fuck him. He should’ve told me what was going on. YOU should have told me what was going on. I’m not fucking blind, Brooklyn. I see the way you guys look at each other. I hear the way you talk to each other. How long have you known him?”
I gape at him. “You introduced me to him!” I remind him. I’m not about to tell him about the bridge and about Nick’s brother. I don’t even remember Nick being there to begin with so I can’t count that as the first time we met.
Shea laughs, though it’s with little amusement, and then stops and furrows his eyebrows when he sees I’m serious. “You’re not kidding.”
I shake my head. “Why would I be?”
He shrugs. “I dunno. I just figured the way you act together …”
“Whatever. Even if I’d known him for years, which I haven’t, that doesn’t excuse what you did.”
Shea agrees, nodding his head. “I fucked up.”
“You did,” I say softly, beginning to forgive him for the little show he put on.
He moves over to the couch I’m sitting on and takes me into his arms. I lay my head on his shoulder when he squeezes me tight. “What about us?” he asks, his voice quiet.
“What about us?” I whisper.
Shea exhales, burying his face into my neck. “I don’t wanna lose you, Brooklyn. I can’t,” he says, his voice wavering.
“You won’t, Shea. Never,” I reply, picking my head up to look at him.
He nods, searching my eyes. “You promise?” he whispers.
“I swear it,” I whisper back, feeling my chest tighten as tears form in my eyes. I hate that I have to reassure him of this. I hate that he feels so alone in his life that he needs me, of all people, another lonely soul, to cling to. I hate that we couldn’t make it work because we were both too miserable to bring true happiness to each other.
Straightening out in my seat, I cup his face so that he’ll look into my eyes. “You’re my best friend, Shea. You can’t get rid of me. Haven’t you learned that by now?” I ask quietly.
His eyes glisten. “You’re more than my best friend, Brooklyn,” he whispers. “You’re family,” Shea continues, breaking the dam that was holding in my tears.
I lean in, hugging him tightly, unwilling to let him go. “I love you, Shea.”
“I love you more, BK,” he responds. “I’m sorry I can’t be more to you.”
My throat closes in at his words, making
it impossible for me to speak, so I nod instead. Sniffling back tears, I let go of him and wipe my face quickly. “You weren’t meant to be more to me,” I say, my voice wavering. “But that doesn’t mean you haven’t been enough.”
He blinks rapidly, his lashes now wet as he smiles. “You always know the right thing to say.”
I smile back and tap his toes with mine. “I’m cool like that,” I joke, smiling brighter when I make him laugh.
“Well, you kind of have to be cool to hang out with me,” he counters.
“Stupid,” I mumble, shaking my head with a laugh, feeling lighter than I have all day.
Shea props his feet up on the table, crossing them at his ankles. “You missed my best fucking song,” he says. “It’s a new one. I just recorded it last week.”
“Oh yeah? How does it go?” I ask, laying my head on his shoulder and closing my eyes when he starts humming the beat of it. I drift off with a smile on my face as he croons to me about life, love, and forgiveness.
The next time I wake up, I’m balled up on the couch, and Nick and Shea are talking in the kitchen behind me. I stay still as I listen to them discuss songs they still have to record and smile, grateful that there’s no bad blood between them. Sitting up and stretching my arms over my head, I hear my phone ringing and get up to get it from my room. I shoot a glance over at Nick who smiles and winks at me, running his fingers through his ruffled hair. I let my eyes trail over his naked chest one time before blinking them away and heading into the room.
We decide to go out for pizza, just the three of us. Well, the three of us and two huge bodyguards, but still. After the initial awkwardness of the three of us being together and Nick claiming me by holding my hand the entire time, we end up having a good time talking about music and people they’ve worked with that I know. Shea tells me about the next part of the trip. The bus got in last night and will be leaving after the show tomorrow night, taking us to Berkeley for his next show. Nick will be touring with him until the record is finished, which he says should be soon, as long as they’re able to get three more solid songs. I agree to stay until they head to LA on Wednesday. I’ve wanted to see Allie anyway and check up on some things in regards to Fab, so it’ll be perfect.
Catch Me Page 25
