by Kristy Marie
“I hate to break it to you, Bennett, but Mom has me here until three.” She blows a bubble and pops it. “I suggest you go find your chill and settle down.”
My chill? Oh, I’m going to find my chill… at Liam’s throat.
“You’re right,” I agree, stepping up and fingering the jar of tickets. “I need to find my chill.”
She reaches up and touches my chin.
And like an asshole, I step back, but not before grabbing that fucking jar and hurling it behind her.
“Bennett!” She screams. “What’s your deal?”
Leaning down, she picks up the jar. It’s broken in half. I pluck it from her hand and toss it into the trash can next to the booth.
“You’re being a real asshole. You know that?”
Not answering, I dust my hands off before sliding them in my pockets.
“You just cost the foundation a lot of money!”
“Maybe I did,” I agree, approaching the ledge. “But you’re still closed.”
Her arms fold across her chest, her lip twitching. She’s beyond pissed. “And what am I supposed to say to our parents?”
I give her a bored look. “Tell them the same thing you told them last night.”
The words slip out before I can take them back.
This half-laugh, half-growl erupts from her throat. “I see. So you can be mad at me for talking to your father, but I can’t be upset that for the first time in twenty years, you locked me out of your room?”
Regret is best served with the truth.
“I’m—”
“Save it, Bennett. I don’t want to hear your excuses. Answer the real question.”
Tension courses through me. I want to argue with her. I’d like nothing more than to yank her to the car and demand answers. But I know that look of defiance. “Fine,” I grit. “We’ll tell our parents we shut down the booth when you became nauseous after the first round of bad breath.”
She shakes her head, and I sigh, feeling around my pocket for cash. I pull out a wad of bills and slam them down. “Whatever this is, let it be my contribution to funding your sick day.”
“Hilarious.”
I shrug while Aspen unfolds the money, straightening the bills in her hand, a thoughtful expression etched in her features.
It makes me nervous.
“You want to ride the Ferris wheel?” I offer, attempting to curb the asshole, and try a different approach back into her good graces.
Her head raises, and she pockets the cash. “Yeah. Sure.”
Thank God.
“Come on,” I jerk my head toward the wheel. “Let’s go before the line gets too long.”
Aspen hops up onto the ledge of the booth and slides her legs over. Why can’t anyone use the door?
“Help me?” she asks, holding her arms out innocently.
I groan and walk over, standing in between her legs. I grab her hips before she stops me.
“Wait!”
“What?”
Her smile, almost as if it were in slow motion, widens.
“No.” I know that look.
I try to step back, but her cross-country-toned legs wrap around me and slam me into the wooden booth. “I owe you a kiss for your donation.”
“No.” I try pulling back, but her legs keep me pinned. “You know the rules.”
She cocks her head to the side. “Oh, Bennett, Bennett, Bennett.” She pinches my chin between her fingers. “I haven’t forgotten the rules.” She licks her lips, her gaze solely focused on my lips. “But this is a purchase. You paid for a service, and I would never send a customer away unhappy.”
I scoff. “You’re not kissing me. Not after last night.”
“No,” she agrees, leaning in closer, her breath on my face. “You’re going to kiss me.”
I shake my head. “Not happening.”
She tips one shoulder. “Then you’ll just have to step aside and let Liam have your turn.” She waves at someone behind me. I don’t have to turn around to know it’s Liam, still waiting to be inappropriate with his soon-to-be employee. “You either let him have a turn or kiss me.”
Motherfucker.
I blow out a breath. “You know I can’t. Not after last night, Asp. Come on, think about this.”
“I’ll be with you in just a moment, Liam,” she calls over my head, completely ignoring me.
Fine. Fuck it. Aspen said it herself; it’s a transaction. I made a donation. Our rules are still intact if we do this.
“Tick Tock, James—”
I don’t let her finish. I knot her hair in my hands and tug her head back, her breath catching. Starting at her throat, I skim my way up, taking the time to savor the feeling of her skin under mine. Her legs tighten and I know she’s thinking exactly what I am: don’t stop.
Inching up her throat, I place a kiss at her jaw, reveling in the warmth and the faint smell of sunscreen.
“Don’t tease me,” she pleads.
“Never,” I answer, dragging my hands across her face, cupping her cheeks. Our eyes meet, hers wide and excited. It’s the worst thing I could have ever seen because now, all I’ll want to do is recreate this look over and over. Want. Love. And excitement.
Closing my eyes, I crash our mouths together. She fists my shirt and pulls me in, her mouth, tasting of passion fruit bubblegum, wields to mine, letting me take everything from her. Nipping, licking, I taste every facet of Aspen Von Bremen. I taste every skinned knee and salty tear. I taste every achievement she’s had. Graduation. First Place in the Varsity Division Cross Country Match. Every single moment I’ve wanted to kiss her, I take.
I kiss her like I’ve wanted from the first time she cried in my arms and begged me to break the rules. In this one kiss, I pour every ounce of love I have for her. She has to know the rules are torture for me too. And it’s only in these exceptions we can be free.
“Bennett,” she moans under my lips.
“Holy shit, boy!”
At the sound of Uncle Hayes’s voice, I jump back.
“You better take that to a car before Theo sees,” he adds, chuckling. “I’m not in the mood for a funeral.”
I clear my throat, ignoring Aspen’s frown. “I was just leaving.”
No walking away
Bennett
A fucking kissing booth.
Wasn’t it just last night I said I would never make another mistake again? For years, I’ve followed the rules—resisted her temptation at every turn, and in a matter of days, I’ve broken most all the rules that mattered.
We won’t come back from this.
Kissing Aspen after all this time… after the years I spent ignoring the tension between us, I break with one exception. A transaction.
And a threat. Let’s not forget that tidbit of coercion.
I don’t know what I expect to happen once she moves, living in the same city as Liam. Will I be able to focus and play football in Georgia? Or will I drive myself insane and transfer schools, giving up an important year to play football?
My mind is a jumbled mess. Clearly, since I promised her twenty-four hours of no rules…
But that kiss…
“I will slit your tires, Bennett Jameson! Don’t you dare get in that car.”
My head falls against the window. “Go back to the carnival, Aspen.” I sigh. “They’ll be looking for you.”
And then they’ll be looking for me.
“No,” she says, slightly winded. “You don’t get to shut down again. Broody Bennett time is over.”
I’m not surprised by her words. I deserve them. Last night, after the incident in the pool, I made sure she couldn’t come talk to me—to convince me what we’d done was okay.
“I’m not shutting down,” I clarify. “I’m simply removing myself from the situation.” I glance down at her swollen lips. “I think that’s best, don’t you?”
She cocks a hip. “Uh, no. What’s best is us banging it out in the backseat.”
My cock stirs.
“But I’m guessing you’ll pass on that suggestion.”
I fake a bored look. “You would be correct.”
She rolls her eyes, reaching into her back pocket for a piece of gum. “Shocker.” She sighs. “Look, Bennett—I’m sorry, okay?”
I’m an asshole. A good man wouldn’t allow the woman he loves to believe she’s the reason he’s upset.
“Don’t say you’re sorry,” I bark, my tone harsher than I mean.
She waves me off, the bite of my words not affecting her at all. “No, I shouldn’t have taken advantage of the situation.” Her gaze lowers to the ground. “I used Liam against you.”
Pulling in a breath, I close my eyes and come to terms with my decision. For years, I’ve made decisions that hurt Aspen repeatedly. And every day she shows up with a smile and a bigger attitude than the day before. She never allows my shit to stop her.
I don’t want to be the guy she remembers as causing her pain.
Because that’s all we’ll have after this summer.
A memory.
Or a nightmare— if I allow a woman like Aspen to walk away.
She’s crazy.
Funny.
Beautiful.
And… loyal, even when she shouldn’t be.
Opening my eyes, I gaze into the depths of hers. I lift her chin, fighting the urge to look away. “You didn’t taunt me into kissing you,” I admit, my hand sliding up her cheek. Her eyes close and she leans into my touch. “I would never need a reason to kiss you.”
Her eyes fly open and I move my hand to the back of her head and step forward. “I can’t honor your rule.”
“What—”
I pull her to my chest, our faces mere inches apart. “I can’t do twenty-four hours with no rules.”
She tenses in my arms, and it kills another piece of me. This is the man she knows. This is the man who disappoints her every single day. Leaning in, my lips hover over hers, eager for another taste. “I should have told you before now…” Our lips press together. The heat, her soft body yielding into mine, it’s too much, our need for each other too exposed. I pull back just enough to feel a brush of her lips. “If we’re going to do this, Asp,” I swallow, “we’re going all in.”
She relaxes under my hands. “For the summer,” she offers with a broken smile. “And then we can walk away.”
I close my eyes. “Then we can walk away.”
“No one will ever know,” she adds, her voiced pained. “Especially our fathers.”
I feel myself nod ever so slightly against her.
This is not what I want.
This isn’t what she wants.
But it’s the only option we have.
“Do we have a deal, Bennett Jameson?”
I don’t answer her.
Instead, I close the gap between us and crash my mouth into hers.
“I can’t believe you’re leaving already.”
My mother knows something is up. “I’m sorry,” I say on a sigh. “I promise to come home more often.”
Being home, around all these memories, is hard enough. Once Aspen is gone, I doubt I’ll be able to stand it even more. But my mother doesn’t have to know that yet.
“Well, I’m sure you’ll have a better time at the lake, anyway.” Mom smiles, folding a shirt and laying it neatly in my suitcase. “You and Aspen always enjoyed the water.”
I nod, thinking about the little island we always claimed as ours. It was in a cove, away from the hustle and bustle of the boaters, only accessible by jet skis. “Yeah,” I agree. “The guys thought it would be a good idea to spend some time together before she leaves.”
Her brows arch, disbelieving. “Just the guys?”
I sigh. “Don’t start.”
She knows I want to spend as much time with Asp as possible.
“You know, Bennett,” she says, scooting closer, her hand on my cheek. “It’s okay to admit you’re going to miss her. You and Aspen have been best friends since you were old enough to reach for her.”
She smiles. “I was jealous of her, actually.”
“What?” I grab her hand from my face and pull it to my lap. “Why would you be jealous of Aspen?”
My mother shrugs, her gaze dropping to our hands. “It’s hard sharing someone sometimes. Especially your own child.” She smiles, but it’s broken. “Drew always wanted me. He reached for me every time I walked into the room.” She pulls her hand from mine, stroking over the top like she’s consoling me. “But you… You never reached for me.”
“Mom—”
She shushes me. “Just listen, son.”
I nod, taking in a breath. I don’t want to know that I’ve disappointed her too.
“Aspen was fascinated with you.” Her voice takes on a wistful quality, as if she’s remembering happy memories and not something she felt jealous of. “She was such a little helper.” She laughs. “At two years old, she begged to feed ‘da beebee’. She was precious as she watched me take care of you two boys. It didn’t take her long to learn your routines. Then she was here, pulling on my clothes every day, wanting to rock you, hold you, and sing you to sleep.”
A tear falls and I wipe her cheek. “Mama. I don’t know what to say.”
She shakes her head. “You watched her, tracked her every movement as she danced around the room, singing, making you laugh.”
She smiles, and it’s pained. “I could never get you to smile. You were such a serious baby. But yet, when Aspen came around, you came alive. You smiled and giggled the sweetest laugh I’d ever heard. You watched her all the time, Bennett. Your brother—” she laughs, “—cared about food and cuddles. But not you. You waited for Aspen. Every day, you starved yourself just so she could feed you. You longed for her, Bennett—something I never thought an infant could do.”
She leans in and kisses my cheek. “And then, when you were ten months old, you decided you were tired of waiting. While Aspen sat on the floor, a book in her hand, making up the words, you stood up and walked, reaching out for her hands.”
A small sob wracks through her chest. “It was the single most amazing thing I’d ever seen. I knew then, Bennett, you had never been mine. You were hers.”
She shrugs and my heart pounds in my chest. “I don’t know what to say.”
She sighs. “I don’t want you to say anything, baby. I’m not telling you this to make you feel guilty.”
Could have fooled me. “Then why are you telling me?” Why are you making me feel like a terrible son? I want to ask, but don’t. I’m not sure I want to know the answer.
She strokes my face. “A love like yours only comes once in a lifetime. I know you struggle with your relationship with Aspen but—”
“We don’t have a relationship,” I lie. “We’re just friends.”
“You can’t lie to me. I’ve been where you are. I’ve loved a man irrationally and irrevocably. You can’t turn it off, Bennett. You can’t force it into a box—it won’t survive.” She strokes my face. “You won’t survive.”
“Have you been watching Lifetime again?” I tease.
She swats me on the shoulder, playfully. “Don’t ignore what’s right in front of you, Bennett. You’re stubborn like your father. But there’s only so many times someone can be pushed away before they finally stay gone. Don’t let her get away, Bennett. For once, don’t be stubborn.”
Exhaling, I drop my head to my chest. “I have to,” I tell her. “It doesn’t matter how I feel about her.”
My mom pulls me into her arms, squeezing me tightly. “There’s always a way.”
The entire way to the lake, Mom’s words haunted me.
Had I really waited for Aspen as an infant? Had I grown tired of watching her before I took fate into my own hands? I envision the scene my mom described with a three-year-old Aspen, clapping and holding her small hands out for me to take. Even then, I wanted her. To touch her. To be near her.
“Aww. It’s so cute you think you’re sleeping in yo
ur room instead of mine.”
At Aspen’s voice, I grin, shaking off the serious thoughts. I was wondering when she would start in on me. Honestly, she waited longer than I expected. The entire drive here I was silent, allowing only the music to distract us. Aspen didn’t ask questions. I think she knew I was in my head and some things are better kept in silence.
Continuing to fold the shirt in my hand, I return, “It’s adorable you think you have a say in where I sleep.”
In a snap reaction, I drop the shirt, swing around and grab her. If I had one takeaway from my mother’s confession, it was that if this is the last summer I’ll get to spend with my best friend, I’m going to devour every second. If a relationship like ours is once in a lifetime, then I want to remember what it felt like to love her, for once, without consequences.
“Ah!”
She doesn’t have time to react, only screams when I toss her onto the bed. Like a lion, I stalk her from the edge, watching as her chest rises and falls with shock and anticipation. This is the man she wanted; this is the man she craves. Her protector. Her warden. Her love.
With one knee on the edge of the bed, I yank her legs straight as I prowl over her. Her eyes are wide and alight with surprise. At her hips, I hold my weight off her and clasp her chin between my fingers. “I think you’d be wise to remember I still make the rules.”
She sucks in a breath. “I thought there were no rules.”
I lean down, inhaling the sweet scent of lavender. “There’s always rules, Von Bremen.”
Without giving her a second to pop off, I crash my lips down on hers. I’m not gentle, but deprived, and wholly abandoned. This time, I don’t envision all the times I’ve wanted to press my lips against hers. This time, I feel all the times I’ve wanted to silence her with my mouth. All the times I’ve wanted to devour every inch of her body so there’s nothing left but pure compliance. In this kiss, I take everything I’ve ever wanted from Aspen Von Bremen. Prom night when I walked her to the door with a kiss on the cheek. The other night when I wanted to consume her in front of the entire bar, so everyone knew she was mine. And on campus when wandering eyes followed her to class. My love for her was caged.
