by Carol Grace
“That it could happen again? I see what you mean. Because if it did...”
“I couldn’t take it. It almost killed me the last time. The next time definitely would.”
Steve studied his friend. “Do you love Laurie?”
Cooper nodded slowly. “That doesn’t make it any easier.”
“What, taking a chance again?”
“Yes. And to ask her to take a chance on me. What if I’m not capable of really loving again? Maybe I just think I’m in love with her. Maybe I’ve forgotten what it takes.”
“You don’t forget that kind of thing. Think of it this way. The more you love, the more love you’ve got to give. I swear I didn’t know how to love a baby. I thought Gretel and I had it all, but she wanted a baby. I told her we couldn’t afford it, we needed her salary. I told her to wait. But she wouldn’t wait. She wanted it now. And guess what, I love that little kid more than I could have imagined.”
Cooper watched Steve’s eyes turn soft and his mouth curve into a smile and Cooper just stared at him. Was this the same guy whose ambition was once to date every girl on the whole campus and to raise as much hell as possible?
“Anyway,” Steve said, picking up his shears and running his finger along the blade. “You’ve got more to give than any man I know. You had something great once. I know. But it’s time to start over. You’ve spent two years getting over it and you’ve got to move on. Stop beating yourself up. It was a tragedy that happened. But it wasn’t your fault. You’ve put yourself through hell and now you’ve got another chance. Not everybody gets another chance, and not everybody is smart enough to take it. Maybe it won’t work out, but I saw how you looked at her, and I know you’ve got it bad. I think she feels the same, but you’ll never know unless you get yourself out to California to that bed- and-breakfast, rent a room and stay there until you recover or she gives in.”
Cooper swallowed the lump in his throat and nodded. He gripped Steve by the shoulder, shook his hand and walked around the house to his car. He should have said goodbye to Gretel, but he didn’t trust his voice at that moment and he had things to do and miles to go.
* * *
On a brisk November day with the sheets and towels blowing in the wind from the clothesline behind the house, Laurie Clayton was on the telephone discussing the newspaper ad for her sister’s bed-and-breakfast with the layout artist. Her sister was still in bed and Laurie hoped she’d stay there for a while and rest. Her due date was looming, her feet were swelling and her bladder was compressed to the size of a pea.
While Laurie was engaged in the discussion of how best to position the copy with the picture of the picturesque house on the edge of the sea, she heard a knock on the front door. She held her hand over the receiver and yelled, “Come in.”
It was hardly likely to be a guest at this time of the morning, or she would have gone to the door herself and acted hospitable. It was probably just the repairman come to fix the drip in the kitchen sink.
But it wasn’t. It was Cooper Buckingham standing in the doorway staring at her. Very, very slowly she hung up the phone and then she stood there behind her sister’s cherrywood desk just staring back.
“I...uh...was wondering if there’s a vacancy,” he said.
“A vacancy,” she repeated stupidly as her gaze wandered over his navy blazer, his striped shirt and creased slacks. “I believe so but I’ll...have...to check.”
“I’ve heard a lot about this place,” he remarked, setting his overnight bag on the polished floorboards and looking around at the stone fireplace, the large comfortable chairs and the pictures of the Clayton family on the wall. “About how charming, how romantic it is.”
Laurie skimmed through the appointment book, unable to locate the month of November to save her soul. The names of the months, the names of the guests all blurred in front of her eyes. “Are you alone?” she asked, closing the book shut and holding her breath.
“For now,” he said.
“Because most people come with someone,” she said. “Although it’s not necessary. It’s just that as you say, it’s so romantic.”
“I understand there’s sherry in the evening and fresh fruit.”
“Cheese and crackers,” she added inanely, when she wanted to scream out, What are you doing here? What do you want?
As if she’d spoken the words, he said. “I’m looking for someone, someone to share it with, the sherry, the fruit, my life...”
Laurie’s knees shook so much at the sound of his voice that she had to sit down in the antique chair behind the desk. Had he really said “My life”? “How long would this be for?” she said, riffling through the pages again.
“Oh, something around forever,” he said with a glint in his eye that made her heart pound. Oh, God, don’t let me get my hopes up, she thought. Let me be as cool as he is.
At that moment her sister came down the stairs dressed in a bright maternity smock and hot pink leggings. Her hair was pulled back in a ponytail and she glowed like a picture-perfect mother-to-be.
“I thought I heard someone knock,” she said, beaming, the perfect hostess even at nine months pregnant. “Is Laurie taking care of you all right?”
“Not really,” he said with a sideways look at Laurie. “I’ve never been to a bed-and-breakfast before, but somehow I thought the welcome would be, I don’t know, a little warmer.”
Mandy looked back and forth between Laurie who by that time had turned almost scarlet with embarrassment and Cooper who was watching her.
“Mandy,” Laurie protested, “this is Cooper Buckingham. Gretel and Steve’s friend. He’s just kidding, of course, about the welcome. I’m sure he didn’t expect someone to throw their arms around him, I mean... after all...” He seemed to be amused at her discomfort, standing there watching her try to explain, so she walked out from behind the desk and turned to Mandy. “Since you’re up, and you know what’s what in the reservations book, I’ll leave you to handle this. I’ve got, uh, something in the washer.” Then with her chin at a defiant angle she strode purposefully from the room.
He didn’t think he could walk into her sister’s bed-and-breakfast and watch her fall to her knees in gratitude, did he? He didn’t think she’d been sitting at that desk waiting for him to come. Maybe he thought her description of the place amounted to an invitation, when all she’d been doing was making conversation. Whatever he thought, she wasn’t interested in finding out. She was determined to get over him, to cure herself forever of falling in love with the wrong men, and his coming here was not going to help her. It would just remind her of what she’d done wrong. Unless ... unless...
Mandy slid her bulky body behind the desk to the chair that Laurie had just vacated. “Sit down, won’t you?” she said to Cooper.
He took one of the straight-back chairs and faced Laurie’s sister, searching for a family resemblance. When she smiled at him, he saw something in the curve of her lips that reminded him of Laurie. “I didn’t really expect a warm welcome,” he confessed. “I don’t deserve one. Not from your sister.”
Mandy nodded. “I heard all about it. She says you’re not ready to get married. Not again. And especially not to have children. But Laurie’s always wanted kids. More than I did. More than anybody. It’s very important to her. So what I’m trying to say is that if you’re here for the sea air, and the refreshments in the evening and the mints on the pillow, then I’m afraid there’s no vacancy. I can’t stand by and see her get hurt again.”
“You and Laurie are very close,” Cooper said, getting to his feet and pacing back and forth in front of the desk. “I envy that. I was an only child. I don’t blame you for being protective of her. You don’t want her to fall in love with the wrong man. I’m here to convince her I’m the right man. I’ve got to, because I don’t want to live without her another day, not even another hour. She knows I love her, but she doesn’t know I want to marry her and have kids and whatever else she wants. Now. Right away. Tomorrow. If she’ll h
ave me.” He braced his arms on the desk. “Does that make sense to you?”
Mandy’s eyes filled with tears. She nodded mutely, reached into the top drawer and held out the key to the large room at the top of the stairs with the view of the ocean usually reserved for honeymooners. “You’d better go find her,” she sniffed, “before she gets lost under a pile of king-size sheets.” She gestured to the back of the house.
Laurie hauled a large wicker basket filled with wet sheets out to the backyard, her muscles straining, her mind spinning. Why was he there? What were they doing in there? If he was staying, why didn’t somebody tell her? When she looked through the windows she didn’t see anyone. Had Mandy chased him away or forced a commitment out of him? Ever since Laurie had suggested her sister answer a personal ad in a magazine years ago, which had led to her marriage, Mandy had felt compelled to find Laurie a husband. But what if Mandy thought Cooper was another Roger? A man who wouldn’t live up to his promises. If so she would have shown him to the door by now. Maybe he was on his way out at that very moment. She shouldn’t have left them alone, not until she knew.
Laurie clamped a clothespin between her teeth and stretched a king-size sheet over the line. Mandy liked the bed linens to smell like fresh air and sunshine. Laurie sometimes wondered if it was really worth the trouble and if the guests really noticed. When the wind tore the sheet off the line and whipped it over her head, she swore softly and waved her arms wildly to disentangle herself.
It didn’t do any good. She spun around in circles clutching the yards of material that wrapped around her body. In the background she heard the door to the patio open and slam shut, and then footsteps on the flagstones. A deep voice carried across the hedge that separated the patio from the lawn.
“The place has everything,” the voice said. “A view and a resident ghost, too. Do you come out to meet new guests or are you a permanent fixture around here?”
Laurie dropped her arms to her sides and stopped struggling to get out from under the percale.
“What do you want?” she said in a muffled voice.
“I just want the answers to a few questions,” he said, his voice getting louder, nearer.
“Don’t come any closer,” she warned, “or I’ll put a spell on you.”
“You already did,” he said, taking her into his arms, sheet and all. “And I can’t get out of it.”
“Have you tried?” she asked, feeling his arms around her, the warmth of his body through the three-hundred-thread-count cotton.
“I’ve tried everything,” he said fervently. “I’ve tried work and more work. I’ve tried returning to the scene of the spell. Nothing works. Got any suggestions?” he asked, finding her face under the sheet with his hands. With a tug he lifted the sheet over her head and tossed it to one side. Her hair had come loose from the rubber band that held it and brushed against her wind burned pink cheeks. Her eyes, a rich caramel color, regarded him with wary interest.
“You could try throwing your car keys over the cliff,” she suggested. “That sometimes works.”
“That’s how it all started,” he recalled. “But then I couldn’t leave.”
“Were you planning to?” she asked.
“Not without you,” he said, reaching into his pocket for the keys. “I went to see Steve and Gretel after you left.” He rattled the keys in his hand. “They said you deserved the best. So if you want to keep looking, there are a lot of men in the foreign legion.”
“But no women. You were right,” Laurie admitted ruefully.
“Somewhere else then. But first I want to tell you that I can’t forget the past. I’ll always remember what I had and what I lost. But something happened when I met you. I fell in love with you, Laurie. Something I thought I never could do. You made me want to live again, to love again.”
“To have children again?” she asked, pressing her hand to her heart, not daring to hope.
He smiled. “To have lots of children. With blond hair and eyes the color of autumn leaves.”
“Some of them might look like you,” she suggested, tears of happiness blurring her vision.
He swallowed hard and looked her in the eye. “That’s the chance you’ll have to take,” he said, praying that she was willing to take the chance.
“I’ll take it,” she said softly.
“Then you’ll come with me?” he asked, drinking in the sight of her with hungry eyes not daring to believe this was really happening.
“Where?”
“Wherever you want. Any more questions?” He held his breath. What if she’d changed her mind. Stopped caring. Stopped loving.
She searched his face for the answer to the most important question of all. In his eyes she saw the answer. She saw the love and trust and commitment she was looking for. But she wanted to hear it. She had to hear it.
“Laurie,” he said, running his hands down her arms to clasp her hands in his. “You said it was time to forget. You said the past was over. But I couldn’t let go. Until you left. Then I realized I loved you, needed you.” She opened her mouth to speak but he shook his head. “No, wait. You said I’d make a wonderful father. I’m not so sure, but I’m going to try. But only if you’ll be the mother of my children.”
Laurie’s eyes filled with tears. “Are you sure?” she whispered. His answer was to sweep her into his arms and carry her into the house and up to the room he’d reserved, where he convinced her beyond a doubt how sure he was.
EPILOGUE
Whistles blew, the band struck up “Anchors Away” and streamers flew from the upper deck of the SS Kungsholm bound for Hawaii, Samoa and Fiji from San Francisco. The blond woman in the pale green linen suit leaned over the railing and waved at her sister and brother-in-law who stood on the dock below blowing kisses. Then she turned to the man next to her in the blue blazer and gray slacks who was popping the cork on a bottle of champagne.
“It’s even better than the Niagara Princess,” Laurie said, her eyes dancing with joy.
“Are you surprised?” Cooper asked.
“Surprised at the basket of fruit in the stateroom from Gretel and Steve? Surprised that Mandy came to see us off in her condition? And surprised to find us on a honeymoon cruise? Yes, yes and yes. It’s everything I dreamed of.”
“No Grand Island wilderness,” he reminded her. “No houses along the river with beautiful lawns.”
“No,” she agreed. “But there are tropical islands, midnight buffets, dancing till dawn.” She sighed blissfully. “And the stateroom with the enormous window.”
“And the enormous bed,” he added.
“Cooper Buckingham, are you trying to get me into bed before we’ve even sailed?” she asked in a shocked voice.
“Does that surprise you?” he asked with his arms around her waist, his dark blue gaze locked with hers.
“Nothing you do could surprise me,” she said breathlessly.
But she was wrong. He surprised and delighted and loved her for fourteen days and fourteen nights at sea and then went on to a lifetime of surprises including a pair of twins with midnight blue eyes and identical impish senses of humor.
“What were the chances of this happening?” Laurie asked him several years later as they watched their children race along the beach below the Miramar Inn where they vacationed every year.
“One in a million,” he answer with a broad smile and a kiss.
* * * * *
LAURIE’S APPLE BAR CAKE x
Ingredients:
1 cup sugar
½ cup butter softened
1 egg
1 ½ cups all-purpose flour
½ tsp salt
1 ½ tsp baking soda
2 ½ cups peeled and finely chopped apples
Topping: 1 tsp cinnamon 1 cup chopped nuts, 2/3 cup firmly packed brown sugar
1 tsp vanilla
Cream sugar with shortening until fluffy; beat in egg. Mix flour with salt and soda into creamed mixture and mix well. Stir in apples.
Spread stiff batter evenly in a buttered 10”xl5” pan. Sprinkle with mixed topping. Bake at 350°F for 30 minutes. Let cool; cut into bars. Serve with whipped cream or vanilla frozen yogurt for breakfast, brunch or any time . Serves 8.
For a change of pace here’s an excerpt from Andrew Culver’s coming-of-age story Yellow Days:
One Night at Kinko’s
I work for a man who wants to be famous. Over the months I’ve come to understand that he is totally unworthy of fame. Quite simply, “Hollywood” Syd Ross has no viable skills. Somehow, however, he is independently wealthy and has no trouble paying me a good living wage. Often I get called at strange hours and given strange tasks. I am expected to promote him, but I often have trouble selling him to comedy clubs because he is a terrible comedian.
One night, Syd called around six. His Brooklyn accent was gruff and urgent. “Andrew, you have to come to Kinko’s. It’s the one on Sunset, do you have time?”
”Yeah, I guess.” I had just finished my second Miller light.
”Because there’s a woman here, she is gorgeous. She’s from Australia, can you come?”
”Well, sure.”
”I’m too old for her. You could date her though. She needs help with her resume. So can you come?”
”Yeah, okay.”
”The one on Sunset, west—no wait—east of Fairfax.excuse me—Derrick! What’s the cross street? The cross street here! It’s Curson—the only Kinko’s on Sunset, come quick. Okay? Come quick. She’s an actress. She’s beautiful.”
