by Yvonne Heidt
Tiffany was relieved that Kat understood quickly. It made her job easier. “Yes, just that. One could be fascinated by it, and another person scared to death. So the symbols I see could very easily be misinterpreted by me. That’s one of the reasons why legitimate mediums might be accused of being frauds. It’s not an exact science. Psychometry is only one of the psychic tools through which we can look at things from a different, outside perspective.”
“It sounds fascinating. What else happens to you?” Kat asked.
“I often see flashes, or x-rays, is a better word, of what’s remaining of the past in a particular location. I can receive echoes of what they felt during their trauma. Normally, I try not to open to that much emotion. It’s too draining for me and can be dangerous. If you want more of a personal connection to the negative energy, you’ll have to ask Shade. But if there is an actual spirit that does come through, I can let you know what they’re trying to communicate. Again, I can only tell you what I see, or rather, my perception of it.”
“That works for me,” Kat said. “So where do we start?”
“I’m going to enter a slight meditative state. Give me a minute.” Tiffany began to take deep breaths. One by one, as they surfaced to clutter her mind, she shut her thoughts out, imagining them being placed in a strong box at her feet until gradually, she felt lighter, free from present distractions and ego.
I am a messenger of love and peace. Please help me to focus on that which was in the past. Please shut out my personal feelings and judgments. I only want to be an observer. Let me stand surrounded with love and light, and protect me from any energy that holds harmful intention. Help me to find the answers that are being sought. Thank you.
Tiffany remained silent in the spiritual aura for a few moments before she opened her eyes. “I’m ready.”
Chapter Four
Kat placed a photograph facedown in front of Tiffany and then turned on her recorder. Fascinated, she watched Tiffany’s features soften until her expression was nearly blank as she placed her fingertips on the photo.
It took all her willpower to keep from touching the hand on the table to see if it was as soft as it appeared. Tiffany’s eyes opened and looked straight into hers. It was an otherworldly glare, pinning her, catching her. Fathomless. It was a heady feeling to be on the other side of it. She was disappointed when it shifted to the left, somewhere on the wall behind her.
“Don’t tell me anything unless I specifically ask for clarification,” Tiffany said. “I’m seeing an average-sized woman. She’s young, in her twenties maybe? She has light hair, light brown—no—hazel eyes. I’m getting that her name starts with a hard J, but it’s short. Joy, Jay, Joan? Joy.” Tiffany’s voice was firm.
Kat didn’t have to look at the file to know she hit it on the head. She was enthralled already by Tiffany’s nearness, and the reading itself was off to a great start. Still, she couldn’t help but see how different researching was from actually witnessing psychometry in action.
Tiffany turned the picture over to look at it. The corners of her mouth turned up slightly as she seemed to acknowledge she knew she was correct on the details. “I’m tuned in on her energy. She feels happy. Oh, it’s her birthday. She’s picking up some last-minute items at the store for the party. Balloons, wine, and her cake.”
Kat struggled to keep her reaction neutral. There was no way in hell Tiffany could have known that Joy had icing in her hair when they found her body.
“She’s smiling as she’s walking to her car. I can see her putting things in the trunk, but she’s also struggling with the helium balloons. She doesn’t notice the man coming up behind her. I can’t see his face; he’s wearing a ski mask. His hands are white, blondish hair on them, his nails are clean.”
That’s a good detail, Kat thought. She wrote it down carefully.
“Yes, it’s very clear. They’re soft hands, not a man that works with his hands much. His clothes are dark. He hit her on the back of the head, and she fell into the trunk. I can see him tying her hands behind her back, but she’s not struggling. She’s out cold.”
Kat realized that Tiffany had answered her thought, not anything Kat said out loud. As fascinated as she was with the process, she knew she would have to be careful with Tiffany’s clairvoyance as well. She didn’t want to taint the reading by unwittingly giving her information telepathically. This could be harder than she first thought. Kat shut the file and decided to listen instead of analyzing the details yet. “Can I ask a question?”
Tiffany nodded. “Sure.”
“How come when you talk about Joy, you seem connected with her emotions? And when you mention the killer, you relay his actions, but you’re disconnected?”
“Shade can link with the bad guys, but I refuse to connect with any dark energy. It’s much safer for me not to try.”
“That makes sense,” Kat said. “Sorry for the interruption.”
Tiffany nodded and continued. “When she wakes up, she’s very scared. I can smell her blood. She’s confused and crying. All she wants to do is go home.”
The sadness in Tiffany’s voice caused Kat some anxiety. It made her realize how different it was to report just the facts. She had been allowed a small distance from the horror, only learning the details after the crimes had already been committed. It hadn’t, in any way, given Kat the emotional connection that she was experiencing now—to actually feel as if she were there, witnessing it. She felt a slight chill in the air. Kat didn’t know if it was because of her proximity to Tiffany, or because of the otherworldly feel to the session.
“I get the impression they drove for a while because there is a blank spot in the energy. She must have lost consciousness. Now she’s awake and has to go to the bathroom. I feel her bumping all around the trunk. Maybe they’re on a dirt road? God, this is awful. She’s lying on top of her birthday cake. How horribly sad that is. There isn’t any hope in her. She’s saying her good-byes to her family because she knows she’s going to die.” Tiffany’s breath drew in sharply several times.
Kat’s shoulder and neck muscles tightened. She couldn’t bear the thought of Tiffany suffering Joy’s experience. She was about to end the session, but Tiffany’s soft voice continued.
“She felt terrible fear when he opened the trunk and forced her out. I’m trying to pull back from the violence because I’m connecting with the attacker as well. He’s powerful, and their energy is becoming intertwined. I’m having a hard time separating the two. It hurts.”
The air was charged in the room, and she wanted to get up and pace the anxiety off but didn’t want to interrupt what Tiffany was doing. “We can stop,” Kat said.
“No. He hit her, and she fell to the ground. She tried to fight at first, but he was too strong and full of rage. He yelled at her. Worthless, hate her, hate her, cheating bitch.”
The hairs on the back of her neck rose with Tiffany’s venomous tone. Kat opened the file and checked the notes for a boyfriend or husband as a suspect. It was getting harder to keep an objective perspective.
As if she could read Kat’s question, Tiffany went on. “No, he doesn’t know her. He’s thinking of someone else.”
“Can you see who?” Kat asked. This was something that wouldn’t be in the evidence, looking out from the killer’s eyes. It could provide new clues.
Tiffany shook her head. “No, not clearly. It was a brief flash of a woman with long reddish hair. Here’s the thing, he’s not thinking logically. He’s bat-shit crazy. I still can’t see him clearly. I’m sorry, but I can’t get any more than that.”
Kat jotted the detail down. There was a definitive heaviness in the air, but she didn’t know if that was her imagination or because of Tiffany’s state.
She didn’t appear to notice that Kat was even there. Her gaze remained unfocused as she continued with the reading. “He’s going to kill her. He’s going to teach her a lesson, the unfaithful bitch. God, it’s like listening to a beehive in his head, the buzzing of hi
s hatred.” Tiffany shivered and crossed her arms. “It’s so cold in here.”
Kat didn’t agree. She was perspiring from nerves and concerned about the effort and toll the reading appeared to be taking on Tiffany. “Didn’t you just say you didn’t want to interact psychically with the killer?”
“I can usually distance from the actual pain. I’m having a hard time with this one, and I don’t know why.”
“I don’t know what I was thinking. I had no idea it would cause you this much discomfort when the police suggested we work together.”
Tiffany smiled weakly. “I want to skip the gruesome details because I don’t want to walk through the actual murder; is that all right?”
“That’s fine.” Kat sincerely regretted that she put that photo in front of her. What she had thought was a good excuse to get near Tiffany turned out to be a hurtful one. She never wanted to see a moment of pain on her face. And yet, she’d asked her to experience a woman’s torture and murder? How fucking stupid could she be? “We can stop now.”
“No,” Tiffany said. “I’ll finish it, but I’m going to skip to the end. He left her broken there, and he’s gleeful about it. Talking to himself about how he showed her.” Tiffany’s voice cracked a little. “He took some of her hair, just whacked it off. He has no regrets over what he’s done.”
Kat felt the hair rise on her neck while she wrote that detail down. It wasn’t in the file she held, but she felt almost positive it would be in the official one. “Do you see where he’s going when he leaves?”
Tiffany closed her eyes. “No. I’m not sure. This is really weird. It’s as if his energy trail starts and ends in the same place. Who he became in that car, isn’t who he appears to be normally. It’s like he’s created in the moment he stalks her, then dies when he leaves the victim. Does that make sense?”
“A split personality? Someone who leads a double life?”
“I’m trying to remember if I’ve ever felt this before, and I can’t. We’ll have to ask Shade. I’m sorry I couldn’t help more.”
“No, I’m sorry. I had no idea what it would be like for you.”
Tiffany took off the throw. “I need to use the restroom upstairs.”
“Of course. Can I get you anything?” Can I hold you, take away the horror you’ve just seen? Kat wanted to wrap her up in her arms in a protective cocoon.
“I just need my bag.” Tiffany picked it up from the hall floor before she disappeared.
It seemed like she was up there for an eternity, but when Kat checked the clock, it had only been ten minutes. What was she doing in there? “Are you all right?” Kat hovered at the landing, lingering to make sure Tiffany was well, but not wanting to appear overbearing.
A door opened on the second floor and Tiffany came back down. “I’m okay,” she said. “I needed to cleanse myself psychically to break the connection.”
Kat noted the slight bruising under Tiffany’s eyes. She felt horrible about it.
“I’m fine, really,” Tiffany said. “I need some air.”
“Sure. I’ll follow you.”
Tiffany led the way through the kitchen of the Victorian, down the back stairs, and through the glass doors onto the large walkout patio. The large area overlooked the water flowing under the Manette Bridge. Tiffany leaned on the stone wall, took her hair down, and lifted her face to the sun.
She looked so delicate standing there, Kat wanted to kick herself again. She’d been so sure when she found the reincarnation of Tanna, everything would fall into place and they’d live happily ever after. She had to remind herself that those were the wishes of a young girl, a fantasy she carried around in her own head. She felt clumsy and heavy. What exactly should she say? “Hi, honey, I’m home?”
Instead, she crossed to the wall, stood beside her, and looked over. “That’s quite a drop.”
“I just love Sunny’s yard. It’s always felt magical to me, and at night the lights across the water are stunning.”
Kat wanted to touch her, but Tiffany sidestepped a pace. There was clearly sparks between them, but Tiffany acted as if she were scared of her. She braced herself. Here I go. “Why do I make you nervous?”
“I don’t know why. That bothers me. All my internal bells and whistles are going off.”
Kat’s heart skipped. Maybe Tiffany did remember her, even if it was subconsciously. “Really?”
Tiffany nodded.
“Is your heart speeding up?” Kat cautiously closed the small distance between them. Maybe if she kissed her, she’d remember. When Tiffany held her ground, she leaned in closer, making sure to give her time to back away if she felt she needed to. “How about now?” Kat tilted her neck and then touched Tiffany’s lips, featherlight, against her own. They were just as soft as they’d been centuries ago.
Tiffany’s body stiffened at the contact. Though it cost her, Kat kept her arms at her sides. The green scent of damp forest reached her, and she heard the crunching of crisp autumn leaves. Inexplicably, a spectral gray fog emerged from the ground, swirling between and around their ankles.
Tiffany gasped and pushed Kat away. “What is that?”
“What did you see?” Please let her remember.
Tiffany took a step back and held up a hand to keep the distance between them.
Kat was disappointed but didn’t press her advance.
Tiffany looked perplexed. “What was that mist?”
Hope flared in Kat’s chest. If she could see the fog, then there was a possibility she would remember her. “Time,” Kat whispered. “Can you go back? To when you knew me?”
“No,” Tiffany said without hesitation. “I can’t do this right now. I have to think.” She turned around abruptly, made a beeline through the glass doors, and disappeared inside. A moment later, Kat heard the front door slam shut and listened to Tiffany’s car drive away.
Kat stood at the wall. She was torn and didn’t know what to do next. Tiffany had just shut her down in her tracks. She knew that Tanna lived on in Tiffany’s spirit, had felt the connection in her very being.
Now what? She’d prematurely played her first card and Tiffany ran away. Kat was used to going after what she wanted with a vengeance, and it had served her well in the past. But that was for her career. She also couldn’t recall the last time she chased after a woman, and it caused her to pause and consider where she stood.
Kat’s instinct told her not to press the issue. Though it went against her nature to wait, what happened next was up to Tiffany. She would have to give her some space. The reading had seemed to fly by, but it had taken nearly two hours. Jordan or Sunny should be home at any time. Kat thought of a dozen tasks she could be accomplishing. But instead, she hopped onto the wall to sit and watch the water go by.
An hour had passed before Kat realized she didn’t have her phone. She must have left it on the dining room table. That was surprising; most times it seemed the Bluetooth was as permanent as the row of gold earrings she never removed.
So much of her job required her to be plugged in and available to run at the drop of a hat. Kat loved technology and the rapid pace it developed. It was only recently she began to question the pros and cons of being on all the time. She wondered if it had anything to do with recalling the memories of her past life, when they lived in harmony with nature, and each other.
Kat entered the hall and heard running on the second floor. “Jordan? Is that you?”
Was that laughter she heard? The hair rose on her arms. “Sunny? Are you home?” Kat waited for an answer, but there was none forthcoming. A small bell tinkled nearby. She turned quickly and laughed nervously when she spotted one of Sunny’s Siamese cats. It was either Isis or Ash; she couldn’t ever tell the difference.
She’d just let out a sigh of relief when a voice whispered in her ear.
Katerina.
Her name was drawn out into four long syllables and scared the hell out her. Where the hell was Jordan? She hurried to the dining room to find her phone and
called her.
“Jordan.”
“I’m almost done. Sorry it’s taken so long, I didn’t expect so many people to show up.”
“Jordan.”
“What?”
“I think I just met your ghost.”
“Oh, Mazie? She’s harmless. At least that’s what Sunny keeps telling me.”
“Look,” said Kat. “I’m here by myself. Sunny’s not back yet.”
“I was just getting ready to call you. She had a client emergency. Where’s Tiffany?”
“She left.” Kat didn’t want to tell her she ran off because she’d kissed her.
“Why? Never mind. Can you meet me? I should be done by the time you get here.”
“Sure.”
“Lock the door before you leave. Later.”
“Fine.” Kat disconnected the call and turned the lock on the knob on her way out. As if a lock is more of a deterrent than a ghost.
*
Tiffany was proud of herself on the surface. Underneath, she knew she was a mess, but held herself together until she got home. She had willed herself to stay in the present moment, though she couldn’t un-feel the sensation of Kat’s lips on her own.
The kiss still sparkled along her nerve endings. The scent of cool water remained with her.
It caused her some consternation, knowing that she would have stepped into that kiss and melted against Kat. Oh, she wanted to. But she was a mother, not a harlot.
Harlot?
Oh geez, that was something her mother would say. Tiffany was almost amused.
Almost.
In reality, it had been the intruding vision that held Tiffany back. The full moon appearing behind Kat, the illusion of a strange mist, the feeling of falling sideways, all had been unexpected. Kat had called it time.
She needed to think. Although unusual, it most likely wasn’t the mist or the vision that had her hitching. It was the loss of control. She hadn’t allowed herself to lose it in a very long time. When she stepped outside the careful boundaries she’d built for herself, something bad always happened. She had responsibilities and Angel depended on her. Tiffany needed to be grounded at all times.
