His pain worsened as he felt over my light, trying to reacquaint himself with it, to feel whatever my uncle told him.
I would so very much like to talk to you, ilya, now that you are truly my sister. I have so much I would like to teach you. Things your pup husband and these traitor seers cannot teach you. Things your uncle cannot teach you––
I felt fury rise in Black’s light.
Solonik’s voice grew colder, more deadly.
I am told you took that child as your mate, ilya. I confess, I was very not happy to hear about this. I was very not happy he was allowed to tie you to him, despite him being so young. I had many angry words for your uncle about this, ilya––
I felt Jem fighting to push him out of my light.
Black’s light coiled around mine, only to be forced out again.
I felt Black’s attention split between Nick and Solonik, even as Nick turned, staring at me with those crimson eyes, his mouth curled in a frown. For the first time it hit me that my mind was still tied to his through the venom.
Nick heard Solonik too, as clearly as Jem and Black.
Maybe even more clearly.
I fought to push Solonik out, but it still felt like shoving at smoke.
Behind my eyes, I saw all of them.
Nick’s crimson-colored eyes, staring at me across the fire escape.
I saw him as I’d last seen him before, on Koh Mangaan, laughing at something Angel said as the three of us body surfed on the main beach below the swimming pools. I saw Nick floating on his back, sighing contentedly as he gazed up at the blue sky, talking about tacos and margaritas for dinner up at Black’s island restaurant.
I saw Angel’s face when we got back from Europe, then later that same night, her eyes full of tears as we sat in her and Cowboy’s apartment at California Street, drinking tequila in honor of Nick and trying to convince each other there was still some chance he was alive.
Gold irises replaced Angel’s light brown ones.
Moonlight splashed across a lean, muscular chest, Black’s eyes glowing as he lay under me in Santa Cruz, his guileless laugh as he showed me my own glowing irises, bringing my palm up to my face.
I saw Jem then, staring at Black, his handsome features blank with fear.
I felt him knowing something I didn’t, knowing what those glowing eyes really meant.
Pain rippled through me, pain I didn’t understand.
Ilya… are you still there, ilya?
I saw Solonik, his violet eyes over me.
I felt his hot skin as he sweated on me in that dank, underground room in Bangkok, a room that smelled of him and me and pad thai and stale beer. I remembered him telling me he’d take me to Russia with him, that I’d never see Black again––
Ilya. His voice softened, pulling on me. Ilya, it’s time to come home. Your family misses you, ilya. Do not let that pup tell you who you are. Do not let him confuse you––
Tears came to my eyes.
Sudden, violent, they ran down my cheeks, accompanied by a pain in my chest that was blinding. I could feel them pulling on me––Charles, Solonik, faces of seers I didn’t know, who I’d never seen before.
My father.
That pain grew debilitating.
I felt all the years I’d been alone. All the time I’d spent alone, waiting for someone to come back for me, to give a shit. All of those years after Zoe died, I waited there, patiently, thinking one day my family would come back, that my father’s brothers would come back, that my mom’s sisters and brothers and cousins would come back.
But they didn’t come back.
They left me alone, and after the war, I made a new family.
Nick and Angel were that family.
Then Black came, and he was that family too.
The pain in my chest got so bad I couldn’t breathe.
I remembered my father in that pain. I felt Black in it. I felt Black, Angel… Nick… my mother… Zoe. I felt my sister Zoe so strongly it felt like she was standing right in front of me. I felt my grandparents, my cousins, Uncle Charles, my mother’s aunts. I saw all of their faces around me, and the pain in my chest nearly made me pass out. It was like the human side of me grappled with the seer side, fighting for control.
I was neither thing. I was both.
I was something else.
I was the orca, leaping from the water under three shining stars.
There was a hard flash of light.
Then, for a long-feeling span of time…
There was nothing at all.
* * *
I OPENED MY eyes.
Faces hung over me.
They were so close, I flinched back, hitting my head into something hard and wincing in pain. For a long-feeling few seconds, I could only squint up at them, blinking through that pain, trying to make sense of the features that took shape in the shadows.
I saw them arguing before I could hear them.
I saw faces contort as their mouths moved, as brows furrowed, as they frowned and glared at one another. Their fear hit at my light––fear, anger, worry. They argued back and forth, trying to deal with their emotions.
My light recognized them before my mind fully caught up.
I felt lights all around me I knew, and somehow that calmed me.
Somehow, it allowed me to take my first real breath.
Once I did, the sound came back on.
“Doc! Hey, look! Black! Her eyes! Her eyes are open!” A female voice, so familiar. “Black, shut up and look! She’s awake!”
Angel.
Angel was here.
She gripped my arm through the dark shirt I wore, exuding her own particular frequency of light. She smiled down at me, worry and relief shining in her light brown eyes.
“Miri, hey. You okay?”
I blinked, once. I blinked again.
When I opened my eyes next, Black was there. His light wrapped into mine––or maybe I just grew aware of it again. Either way, it enveloped me like a physical force, pulling me into him with an insistence that caught in my throat, making my chest hurt. Despite the charge I felt behind it, I relaxed into that pull, feeling a relief beyond words.
Worry plumed off him as he stared down at me.
His fingers touched my cheek and forehead, stroking the hair out of my eyes, stroking the side of my face, stroking my jaw.
Miri, he ventured softly. Miriam, honey… ilya. Are you okay?
I nodded, opening my eyes as I looked up at him.
It was strange how that one word could sound so different coming from him.
More relief washed over me as I studied his gold irises.
I love you, I told him. I reached up, caressing his jaw, then his neck, my fingers soft, almost tentative. I watched his eyes react, stroking his throat. I love you, Quentin. Only you. I want to stay with you. Promise me.
Black went totally still, looking down at me.
Then, slowly, his eyes filled with tears, shocking me with their brightness, even as I felt a plume of near-aggression leave his light, mixed with a heat that closed my eyes. When I opened them again, he nodded, leaning down to kiss my face, then my mouth.
You’re not going anywhere, ilya, he sent, gruff. You run off into a nest of goddamned vampires like that again, and you’re getting a public spanking, though.
I nodded, again feeling that rush of relief.
Somehow, just hearing him say I didn’t have to go to Charles, I felt calmer.
I looked around at the rest of the faces then, and saw them watching us, even as they gave me and Black space, their eyes and light cautious as they looked between us.
My eyes returned to him, meeting his gold eyes.
What happened, Quentin? Did you do something with your light?
I felt him react to me using his first name a second time, even as his light seemed to envelop me more. Moving closer to me in a crouch, he wiped his face with one hand, his gold eyes never leaving mine. His fingers continued caressing my jaw
and neck as he looked down at me. A surge of possessiveness left his light, mixed with a wave of affection that bordered on aggression, like being squeezed in a bear hug.
Then I saw those eyes flicker towards Jem, who I realized was one of the other faces hanging over me.
It occurred to me only then that other seers probably heard what I’d said to Black.
Black turned, staring down at me.
“Fuck them,” he said, gruff. “Fuck everyone, Miri. And no, ilya. I didn’t do anything with my light.”
Rubbing my shoulder and neck with his fingers, he glanced at Jem a second time.
“I wanted to,” he said, a faint scowl on his lips. “The others thought it was a bad idea. They told me not to do it, not with Solonik watching.”
I felt worry leave his light, even as his eyes glanced up, looking at something overhead. I realized he was looking at the buildings, scanning the rooftops with his eyes and light.
We need to get out of here, ilya, he sent, his thoughts a mutter. We need to get off the street. Can you get up? Or do you want me to carry you?
What about Nick? I sent, remembering. Where’s Nick? Did Solonik––
Black shook his head.
Nick’s fine, doc. Brick and Dorian showed up, not long after you collapsed. They took Nick with them. They said they’d leave the area, and I’m pretty sure they meant it. Brick did, anyway. Scowling, Black stroked my hair, tugging me closer with his light. Brick apologized for not finding us sooner… and for Nick biting you. Like that fucking matters.
He studied my face, his eyes apologetic, worried.
Brick said he has a lot of his people here, Miri, Black added. He said to thank you for trying to warn them, but that he has more than enough with him to hold his own against Solonik and whoever else. More than I’d calculated, frankly, or I never would have agreed to come down here in the first place.
Pausing at my frown, he added,
Yarli’s working with Javier’s drone pilots to try and track Solonik.
Frowning at that, I fought to get up.
Angel and Black immediately bent towards me, catching ahold of my arms on either side as I struggled to my elbows. They helped me the rest of the way up to a seated position when I gripped each of their forearms.
Once I’d regained some semblance of verticality, it hit me that I was on the sidewalk.
I glanced around at where we were, and saw a little boutique shop I recognized, one I’d been inside a few times. They sold secondhand clothes and jewelry on consignment, mostly antiques. I couldn’t remember what exact street it was on, but I knew it was one of the little side streets off 16th. It definitely wasn’t in the same alley with the fire escape.
My head throbbed. My elbows and back hurt, but mostly my head.
It felt quiet around us.
Well… not quiet exactly.
Now that I was listening, I heard shouts and screams in the distance, and sirens, but all of it felt a lot further away. From what I could see and feel, we were at least five or six blocks from any of the riots or protesters, much less any of the police.
“What the hell happened?” I started to climb to my feet, and Angel and Black each grabbed one of my arms and my waist, helping me up. Once I’d made it back to my feet, I stood between them, fighting to get my equilibrium back.
My legs and knees were still trembling.
Wincing at the pain in my head, I looked up at Black, gripping his arm for balance.
“Did something knock me out?” I said.
Black didn’t answer.
I saw Angel’s lips curl in a frown, right before she exchanged looks with Cowboy and Dex, who stood on her other side. I glanced around and saw Kiessa and A.J. standing there, along with Zairei, the seer who looked like an anime character, and Jax, who looked paler than usual, gripping his rifle in front of him in both hands.
All of them were watching me now, a mixture of worry and relief in their eyes.
Confused by what I saw and felt there, I focused back on Angel. Most of what I felt on her was puzzlement though, like she didn’t know what happened, either.
Jem glared at Black.
When Black wouldn’t return his gaze, or answer me, Jem focused his stare on me.
“The construct attacked you, Miri,” he said. “You were weak from vampire venom and being bit, and your uncle’s infiltrators saw the opening and went after you… with Solonik in the lead. We were slow to react.”
Scowling at Black a second time he added,
“Truthfully, after your conversation with your uncle, I was expecting the attack to come at your husband… not at you. Now I think he was trying to actually pull you, while your husband was occupied with Nick. In any case, they were clearly trying to take control of your light. They mostly succeeded, too,” he growled. “They locked you down damned fast… so fast, I have to assume they had the lines to you built already, likely via your uncle and Solonik himself.”
I gave Jem a flat look.
“He was connected to you before,” Jem said, unflinching. “Solonik.”
“That’s one way of wording it,” I muttered.
Jem’s jaw tightened, but his tone didn’t change.
“Your uncle tried to extract you, Miri,” he said. “Are you hearing me on that? Do you understand what that means?”
“I get the gist,” I said, wincing as I cautiously tested my legs. Angel and Black moved with me, letting me get my balance again. “So?” I glanced over at Luce and Dex, who looked worried, too. “Are we ordering a bunch of Ubers? Or what?”
Cowboy burst out in a laugh.
When I glanced at him, he quirked an eyebrow, smiling.
“We’ve got cars coming, Mrs. Black,” he said, giving me a symbolic tip of the hat. The grin on his face widened. “You scared the shit out of us, by the way. Twice. Running after those bloodsuckers like a damned crazy person. Then going down like a fucking stone.”
I frowned, studying his face.
“I passed out,” I said.
Of course I passed out. I knew that. What I didn’t know was what happened before that. Still looking at Cowboy, I frowned.
“How did I get out of that? If Black didn’t do it––”
“You did something,” Angel blurted, drawing my eyes to her. “That’s what it looked like.” She glanced at Cowboy. “I mean, we’re not seers, but that’s how it looked to us.”
“Ayuh,” Cowboy agreed. “It did.”
“What did it look like?” I said.
Cowboy and Angel exchanged another look, then Cowboy sighed, resting his hands lightly on his waist.
“You went down, sister, like I said.” He made a diving motion with his hand, smacking it into his palm. “Like a rock. We all panicked, and grabbed you. Jem here…” He motioned at the green-eyed seer. “…was yelling about how they’d hacked your mind, that we had to be careful or you might attack us––”
“Then your eyes opened,” Dex said, joining in from Black’s other side. “Miri, your eyes were like flashlights. They glowed this pale gold and green color––”
“––and there was this kind of low-level boom––” Luce added.
“––or more like a feeling than a sound,” Cowboy amended. “Like the pavement got hit with some kind of sonic charge. Like a sound too low for human ears.”
“––then everything just felt different, Miri,” Angel said, frowning.
She glanced at Black, but he only motioned for her to go on, his face unmoving.
Angel looked back at me.
“They said you crashed the construct, Miri. Like you just broke it somehow. Maybe not the whole thing, but the part Solonik and your uncle were using to mess with you. It even affected the people on the street. A lot of them ran away after that… the Purity rioters, too. Black, Jem, Dex and me just grabbed you then, and carried you out of there. Brick and his people had left by then, and our team couldn’t track Solonik with the construct down––”
“Not without
using you,” Black grunted, contributing to the narrative for the first time. “And there’s no way in fucking hell I was letting them do that.”
Silence fell after he spoke.
In it, I could only look around at all of them, frowning.
Finally, I turned to Black, looking between him and Jem.
“So what did I do, exactly?” I said.
Both of them frowned, almost in unison.
In different circumstances, it might have been funny.
“Do you really not know?” I said. “Or do you just not want to tell me?”
“We don’t know,” Jem said, blunt.
“Then how could you possibly know it was me who did it?” I said, puzzled.
“It was you,” Jem said.
I looked at him, frowning.
Jem glanced at Black, giving him a death look, his handsome features hardening before he returned my gaze. “…As for exactly what you did, I’d have to know more before I could speculate, Miri.”
“Know more?” I followed Jem’s eyes to Black, giving him a questioning look. “What does that mean? Know more about what, precisely?”
“About whatever the hell you and your husband actually are,” Jem growled, aiming another glare at Black.
I blinked. “What we are?”
“Yes,” Jem growled.
Looking from Black to me, he motioned towards my face, his accent growing stronger as he stared at my eyes.
“…I haven’t got a fucking clue what you are, Miriam. Either of you. And your goddamned husband isn’t talking.”
I watched Black scowl at him, resting his hands on the guns he wore on his hips, a pose that made him look strangely like a gunslinger. He’d let go of my arm, but I could feel him hovering over my light, that worry and protectiveness creating a wall around both of us.
I hadn’t even noticed the wall until that precise moment, but now I could feel it as a near-physical entity, cutting me off from the minds and lights of those around me, everyone apart from Black himself. It struck me that Black was using those lower structures in his light to separate the two of us from the wider Barrier.
TO BLACK WITH LOVE: Quentin Black Mystery #10 Page 37
