by Mia Downing
“So why a spy and not a pilot of some sort?”
He shrugged, but the tension faded and he was completely at ease again. “I don’t know. I hate commercial flights, you can’t dog fight the plane next to you, and those pokey jets sure as hell can’t do any of the combative maneuvers of an F-15. But sometimes, they still let me fly, and it’s enough.”
“Yeah?” As adventurous as the man was in bed, she doubted she wanted to get into a plane of any sort with him if he were at the controls.
“I took Chase up last year. He fired me on the first barrel roll, and then his language got progressively worse until I finally got sick of it and hit enough G’s to make him pass out.”
“That’s horrible!”
“He’s a big boy.” Jake gave her a cocky smile. “You’ll figure out his mind games soon, and you’ll wish I had dumped him off over the ocean somewhere.”
“Has he ever been home with you?” She wanted to ask about Kate but didn’t dare.
“He’s been quite a few times—never Kate, though. I don’t bring women home. He’s been home to Texas with me, too. It’s fun to watch him ride, because his need for control puts him at constant war with the horse, instead of just going with the flow, you know? Poor Jessa—she’s my mare—knows way too many swears because of Uncle Chase. He likes trying to shoot off her back, though. It’s the only way I got him back on after she bucked him off.”
“You’re a horrible man.” She really didn’t think so, but it didn’t hurt for him to think her offended.
Innocence didn’t sit well in his eyes—it was way too forced to be believable. “It wasn’t my fault she bucked him off. She didn’t like how much rein he was using. I told him not to do it, but he swore like a sailor at me instead of doing as I told him, and bam. She dumped him.”
She had a hard time picturing Chase in these situations. She’d had sex with him, once, at the club a few years ago. He had as few limits as she did at that point, and sex with him had scared the hell out of her. Granted, she had pushed for it, and he had given her everything asked for. But he wasn’t any easier to deal with at work.
Yet somehow, Jake and Chase seemed to have hit it off, and if anyone could get a laugh out of someone as tightly wound as Chase, it would be Jake. And obviously, Jake thought Chase was the bomb as a friend. Too bad for him that friendship seemed at an end.
Tia looked at Jake. “Can I ask you something?”
“Sure.”
“It’s not really polite conversation, but how did you go from being a good Catholic boy to being the club’s legend?”
“I don’t know.” He scratched his forehead and thought for a long moment. “I guess I sort of fell into it one night. I met a girl who liked kink, and it was all downhill from there.” He put on a pair of sunglasses, and she wished she could see his eyes instead of her reflection in the lenses. “You?”
“My second—boyfriend—liked it. I guess I didn’t know any better. Then it became part of the…quest.” Her cheeks grew warm. “If I couldn’t come the normal way, maybe something darker would work. It’s more than that, though. I liked kink from day one. Just because I don’t usually come, it doesn’t mean I don’t like what’s being done to me. A lot. More than most men would probably tolerate.”
“But that’s not working, is it. Walking the dark side for your quest.” It wasn’t a question.
“No.”
Jake was thoughtful for a moment. “When was the last date you had?”
“Date? You mean…movies? Dinner?”
He nodded.
“Never. Or it seems that way. This job doesn’t really bode well for dating. You?”
“Same.” Jake smiled at her. “What about vanilla sex? When was the last time for that?”
He asked the weirdest questions. He was all Dom. She loved playing bottom. Why would he even consider vanilla sex? “Oh, probably about the same as that last date.”
He ran his hand through his hair, and Tia sensed he was uncomfortable with the direction he was about to take the conversation. “I guess you’re in for a surprise, then. I neglected to tell you the house rules before you volunteered to come.”
She wasn’t going to touch the fact that he’d blackmailed her into coming. “House rules? Like, don’t wear shoes in the house, put the toilet seat down, toss out the empty carton of milk instead of putting it back in the fridge?”
“Sorta.” He glanced at her again, and she wanted to rip the sunglasses from his face. “When I go home, I’m not allowed to do anything I do in D.C. House rules.”
“Nothing?” What in the hell did he do at home, then?
“Nope. So up until now, there’s been a moratorium on sex at home, as well as no talk of work, no speaking any foreign language. No fast food. The only things I do that I would do in D.C. are play video games and run, because if I came home and had slacked, Chase would kick my ass.”
“And the video games?”
He shrugged. “Once a guy, always a guy. The house didn’t seem to mind video games, and again, it helps with work. We play a lot of video games during down time on a field mission. I’m not losing to Chase.”
“Boys.” Her lips curled into a smile. “How will we survive with no fast food?”
“I hope you can cook, because I can’t.” His grin faded. “But more importantly, we have to get around the no sex rule.”
She was hoping the moratorium would just be lifted. “What a pansy. It’s your house. Change the rules.”
“It doesn’t work that way—stop looking at me like that. You don’t understand. The rules are important to me. Every home has rules, and unfortunately, I need these rules to keep me sane during vacation time. Even Chase followed the house rules, though he bitched the entire time and made me eat that French junk he likes to cook.”
Tia stared at Jake for what seemed forever, and he didn’t burst out laughing or point and shout, “Fooled you.” He was serious. God damn him. “You promised me orgasms! I can’t have an orgasm if your house says we can’t have sex.” She crossed her arms over her chest. “Your house sucks.”
“I’m thinking, darlin’.” He tapped the steering wheel with his thumbs for a few moments. “What I propose to get around the no sex rule is to change it to a vanilla sex rule, because we both know I’m not doing that in D.C.”
“Vanilla?”
“Yep. Vanilla.” He glanced at her and all she saw was her glare in the reflection of his lenses.
The fucking sunglasses had to go. “Really? I don’t even know if I know how to do that.” She scrunched up her nose. Missionary position for an entire weekend? No bondage? No anal? Shoot her now. She’d never get her proper orgasm. “What if we don’t like it?”
“Well, then we spice it up. I’m sure vanilla people can get a little kinky.” He set his jaw a little as he thought, looking more serious as he glanced at her. “When I go home, the purpose is to clear my brain. I go home when I need to be as far from what my regular life is. My life is not working. I am man enough to admit that. And for one weekend, I think we both need not to be spies, not to be adventurous, and just be…normal. That’s what going home is about. It’s about being normal.”
“Normal.” She’d never been normal. Would never be normal. But it was a tantalizing thought. What would normal be like, with Jake?
“Maybe being normal is what you need to solve your problem,” he said softly.
Maybe? She swallowed and thought of the life she had lived thus far. Wild. Adventurous. Sinful. She was definitely going to rot in hell, but at the same time, she didn’t know if she would change it. She wasn’t so sure her problem was linked to her lifestyle choices.
She glanced at him again as he removed his sunglasses. So handsome, his blond hair tousled. For the first time, his blue eyes were tired. Sad. He really did need to get away, so he could cleanse himself of Blondie, put some distance between them. Maybe being there for him wouldn’t be so bad. Maybe it was the right thing to do.
God hel
p her, she wanted him, even though his heart belonged somewhere else. Her entire being felt alive, even just riding in the truck next to him, his hand dangerously close to her leg. Tia wet her lips. His heart might be claimed, but he wanted to be normal—with her. If she was honest, a very small part of her longed for something different in her life. She’d been searching for different for a long time, and he was right—it wasn’t working. Maybe normal was just what she needed, too.
“Normal it is, then.”
Chapter Five
The quest for normal began in the grocery store, because as Jake told Tia just after lunchtime, that’s what normal people did. They bought groceries. So she tagged along when they stopped in the same little town he lived in when he wasn’t working. His place in rural Virginia exceeded the work rule of needing to be able to be on a plane in under an hour limit, but he loved the farm too much to sell it.
Jake strolled into the grocery store like he owned the place, smiling at the pretty checkout girl, kissing one older lady’s cheek when she greeted him by name. Then he grabbed a cart and Tia’s hand and off they went.
“What do you like?” he asked as they strolled through the fresh produce. He grabbed a huge bag of carrots and dropped them into the cart.
“Hmm. Anything that isn’t featured in an airport restaurant section.”
“No cinnamon buns, then.”
“I like the cinnamon buns.” She pondered for a moment. It’d been ages since she planned any sort of meal for any length of time. “I want a roast chicken and an ice-cream sundae.”
“Really? I’ll make you run extra for ice cream.”
“I’ll pay double the miles for hot fudge.”
He grinned. “You’re on.”
They went to the frozen foods section, fought over ice cream flavors, and finally decided they both could stand chocolate chip. He gave her a lascivious glance that heated her insides as he put a can of whipped cream in the cart.
“Vanilla people don’t use whipped cream for that,” she informed him but let it stay. She wanted it on her sundae. She’d be damned if the stupid house kept her from having whipped cream.
“I bet they do. You want me to ask someone? I don’t even know if I know any vanilla people.” Jake turned, looking inquisitive, innocent, and she freaked.
“No!” She glanced around, afraid he’d turn to the nearest couple and ask, but they were alone in the cooler section.
Then they found the aisle with condoms. He started to empty the shelf, she slapped his hand. “Vanilla people don’t have that much sex.”
“They don’t?” He looked at the cart, and then at her with a wolfish grin that dampened her panties. “I want to have that much sex.”
“I bet you do, but take only one box. The store isn’t going to run out while we’re here.” She wanted to say he wanted to have that much sex with Blondie, but she didn’t want to ruin his lighthearted fun. He really was fun, exciting, and she found herself liking him more by the second.
They bought her chicken to roast, more real food, and a few movies from a rental box in the front. Then they gathered their purchases and headed for his truck. She paused on the sidewalk at a shop window, drawn by a purse. Then she realized what the store was, and she blinked.
“You knit?” Jake asked at her elbow, studying her face and the materials in the window. It was a knitting store. The clutch purse must have been an available kit, and it was so cute, fun, and she fell in love immediately. It would be perfect with her silver gown. Hell, it might even hold one of her smaller guns.
“I used to knit, in another life.”
He grabbed her elbow and tugged her toward the store’s entrance.
“No, what are you doing?” She tried to plant her feet on the sidewalk, but he was very insistent and much stronger. And a part of her really wanted to go in.
“Going home means we do things we don’t do in D.C. That means you’re going to knit,” he commanded in a voice very close to his Dom voice, one that still had a touch of Texan charm in it.
She stared at him. “You’re crazy.”
“I want a hat.” Jake opened the door and gently pushed her in first. “No one has ever knit me anything before.”
“I find that hard to believe.”
“I grew up in Texas. Who knits winter hats in Texas?”
He had a point. “It’s May. You don’t need a hat.”
“I want a hat.” His jaw set in a way that brokered no more discussions on the issue and Tia sighed as she stepped fully inside the quaint shop.
Once inside, he dragged her toward the window display and she gazed longingly at the purse. It was even prettier inside the store, close up, all silver beads and shiny. She didn’t even know one could knit with beads. If she had a shred of girly girl left in her, she would be crying purple puddles of need.
“Knit me a hat and I’ll buy that purse thing for you, too.”
“Jake, no.”
“Miss?” he called to the ancient sales woman, stocking yarn into a cubicle. He flashed that million-watt smile of his, the one that weakened her knees on so many occasions. And yes, it worked, because the woman blushed like a schoolgirl. “You think you can help me choose some yarn so my little lady can make me a hat?”
“Of course!”
Jake’s grin turned cocky and Tia became a helpless bystander as he charmed the storeowner into helping him find just the right blend of wool that wouldn’t be itchy. The right color—he wanted black with a small blue band. He chose the best needles—ebony wood, so expensive compared to plastic—and even got her a book for a pattern.
And then he offered up her prize—the glittering evening purse—and she melted. “Thank you,” she whispered. No man had ever bought her anything she remotely wanted before. Never mind a purse.
His eyes sparkled with amusement as he carried the purchases, along with the bag of groceries, back to the truck. “You’ll pay, believe me. But I’ll probably enjoy my hat more.”
She doubted it. He was just as considerate in bed as he was out, but one could never be sure. “How far is your home?”
“Just up the road a bit. I called ahead. I have a friend who cares for the place for me while I’m gone. She’s bringing the horses over. They should be there when we arrive.”
“You mentioned horses, but I didn’t realize they’d be at your house.”
“I have two. It’s part of the charm of coming home.” Jake smiled. The closer they got to home, the easier he smiled, and the less smug those smiles became as well. “You can’t take the ranch from the Texas boy. I don’t know what I’d do if I couldn’t come home and ride.”
“What else do you enjoy while at home?”
“I read. I have a tree I like to sit under in the yard. I mess around with the tractor. I fish in the lake and swim there in the summer. I like to shoot. I have a target range out back. Even though shooting is something I’d do in D.C., it’s a necessity. And I like to hunt, so I’ll take out the shotguns.” He looked at her, his mouth firm, serious. “And I don’t know what else I enjoy. If I’m in D.C., I am either working or spending time with Chase and Kate and evenings at the club sometimes. So my fuck-up has really made an impact in my life, as you can imagine.”
“I can see that.”
“But when I come home…” He looked so wistful, and the stress seemed to just melt from the lines in his face. “I’m home.”
****
Jake stepped out of the truck and sucked in a deep breath of fresh, Virginia air. He loved it. Not as much as he loved Texas, but if one had to live a zillion miles from their home state, Virginia had a lot of selling points. This farm was his major selling point. He loved everything about it, from the old white clapboard farmhouse and rolling hills, to the tire swing in the front tree.
Tia got out and looked around, then smiled. “It’s beautiful.”
“It is, isn’t it?”
She glanced at the ancient farmhouse with pristine white clapboards, the walkways bordere
d by late spring flowers. “So this is the possessive house with the wacky rules.”
He rounded the truck and put a finger to his lips, giving her wide eyes. “Don’t let the house hear you. It will demand vengeance.”
“I think it’s already well on its way to vengeance with the vanilla sex rule.”
He laughed at the dirty look she gave his house. “Be thankful there’s any sex. When Chase came home with me, the no sex rule was in full effect. It was a sad, sad time.”
“And how do a couple of man whores entertain themselves without sex?”
“Lots of booze and bad porn. It’s always the solution.” Jessa, his mare, nickered, and Jake went to the fence as both horses ambled over. His heart gave a funny leap at seeing them again. He missed the horses the most while away.
“Hey, girl.” He patted Jessa, his elderly bay mare, and Tonka, the six-year old gelding nosed his golden head over the fence for attention. “There are carrots in the grocery sack. You want to feed them one?”
“Sure.” She rustled in the truck and came out with the familiar cellophane bag that made the horses nicker. Jessa stomped an impatient hoof. Tia looked surprised. “They know the carrot bag?”
“Smart creatures, these two. They at least know the crinkle of the plastic.” He ripped open the bag and gave Tia a carrot to feed. “You know how?”
“Of course.” She expertly broke the carrot into pieces and stuck her hand under Jessa’s muzzle. Tonka got one next. She grinned up at him, and his heart did a different funny leap, one that it hadn’t done in a long, long time. “Will you ride them today?”
“After we get settled. You can ride Jessa if you want. She’s quiet. Tonka is a handful.” He patted the buckskin’s golden neck, then turned back to the truck. “We’ll take in the groceries, and we can leave our overnight bags in the living room. Those can go upstairs later.”
“Okay.”
She was still stroking Jessa’s neck, reluctant to leave. He knew the feeling, and he leaned against the truck for a moment, drinking her in. He realized with a start this was the first time he assessed her as a woman, not a bed partner, a friend with benefits, or as his captor. He knew she was beautiful, but usually when he assessed her, it was to size up what he was going to do her first, how he’d use her, what pleasure or pain he’d extract or deliver.
