“Were either of the McKay camps right?”
Dalton shrugged. “No. I’m not…some smooth operator like most of them.” He shot her a sheepish look. “As you know firsthand. After Tell and Georgia got together, I was the odd man out everywhere. Spending time alone…never really been my thing. I always had my brothers or my cousins around. And without sounding like this is a fucking pity party, I may as well have been a ghost. So I spent a lot of time on the road, learning to be by myself, doin’ what I wanted to do. Then last summer after you went to South America, Addie and I ended up shooting pool at the Golden Boot. Shocked the shit outta me that she didn’t hate me.”
“Why? Addie doesn’t hate anyone.”
He raised a dark eyebrow. “I assumed you’d told her about us?”
Rory shook her head.
“I never mentioned those, ah, incidents either when she and I started hanging out. She’s a sweet woman, nice to the core, everyone in town loves her and after three months of dating, she told me that she loved me.”
Rory clenched her jaw to keep it shut.
“You know what’s pathetic? I was so desperate at that point in my life for someone to profess their love for me that I proposed to her. She said yes and I figured we’d make a good life together.”
“Did you ever love her?”
“Thought I did, until…”
“Until what?”
He opened his mouth. Closed it. Picked up another rock and threw it.
Pushing was her way, but this time, she didn’t push. Part of her was afraid to hear him voice her suspicions out loud.
“So we set the wedding date. Everyone was happy.”
Were you happy?
“Addie focused her worries on the flavor of the cake and the color and monogramming on the napkins. I kept a lid on my worries. I convinced myself it was nerves. All men get screwed up thinkin’ about becoming a husband, and a provider, and only bein’ with one woman for the rest of his life.”
“You didn’t talk to your brothers, your cousins, your friends—anybody—about this since they’d gone through it?”
“No.” Then he went quiet.
“That’s it? That’s all I get about how you decided to leave my best friend standing alone in front of a church full of people?”
“I can’t…”
“You can’t? You won’t is more like it,” she spat.
“You wanna know why? I’ll tell you. But you answer this first. How did you react when you found out Addie and I were getting married?”
Sick to my stomach. Jealous. Mad. She tossed out a cool, “I was all right with it.”
Dalton met her gaze head on. “Bullshit. I’m bein’ honest with you, at least have the goddamn balls to be the same with me.”
“Fine. I was upset, okay? You and Addie aren’t a good match. But how could I say that to her? How could I be negative, without giving our stupid past history as the reason for my negativity? Especially when she immediately asked me to be her maid of honor? I had to suck it up, McKay. Act like I was happy for her.”
Those blue eyes turned shrewd. “But you weren’t happy. Addie and I weren’t a good match…why? Because she’s too good for me?”
“Fuck that. You two only ended up together because you were both lonely and wanted to end that loneliness. She’d felt that way a lot longer than you. She wanted to be a wife and a mother more than anything in the world. You offered it to her so she took it.” Immediately Rory regretted blurting that out. “Sorry.”
“Sorry because it’s true?”
“Maybe.” Rory exhaled. “Look, you should’ve been honest with her when you started having doubts.”
Dalton laughed. A little hysterically.
“What?”
“Nothin’.”
“You insisted on this honesty thing, you damn well better stick to it.”
His blue eyes were fierce when he got in her face. “I had worries, not doubts, certainly not flat-out what the fuck am I doin’ thoughts prior to putting on my tuxedo last Saturday morning. I didn’t feel that doubt, that absolute wrongness of standing in front of a minister, about to promise my devotion and my life to the wrong woman until…”
Rory didn’t back down and she wouldn’t let him either. “Until…?”
“Until I looked across the altar and saw you.”
Every molecule of air left her body.
“In that moment I knew marrying her would be the biggest mistake of my life. Don’t insult me and pretend you didn’t feel it when I looked at you, Rory.”
She’d felt it. Everything she’d ever wanted from him had been right there in his eyes…as he was about to marry her best friend.
“Since I’ve had several days to do nothin’ but think about this fucking mess, I realized if you’d been here instead of in South America, I never would’ve proposed to her.”
“Omigod. You are not seriously blaming this on me, Dalton McKay.”
“I’m saying if you’d been around I would’ve been reminded.”
“Of what? Of all the great times we’ve had together in the last six years? Let’s not forget all the shitty things that you’ve done to me—”
Dalton grabbed her upper arms and yanked her closer. “Shitty things we’ve done to each other. You’re not completely blameless in this, Rory.”
She hated the truth in that statement. He’d acted; she’d reacted. She closed her eyes. “Stop. Let go of me, Dalton.”
“I can’t.”
“Why do we keep doing this to each other? You should’ve just married her and we’d be done with this.”
“No.”
“Yes.”
“No, goddammit, look at me.”
Rory lifted her chin and met his gaze.
“I’ve got no idea on how to make this right. It’s all too…raw right now.” His eyes were filled with anguish. “I won’t compound the problem and ruin a friendship between you and Addie by asking you to be with me here. Even when that’s what I want.” He reached for her ponytail, sifting the long strands through his fingers. “It’s what I’ve always wanted.”
“Don’t do this to me.”
“I can’t help it.”
“I can’t be with you anyway. My life is in Laramie, not here. I’ve got two years left before I get my master’s degree. I’ve busted my ass my entire academic life to get to this point.”
“What then?”
“I don’t know where I’ll be when I’m done with school. But I know exactly where you’ll be.”
“Where?”
“Right here.”
“Don’t be so sure of that.”
Now Rory knew he was bullshitting her. His McKay roots were sunk deep in ranching, his family and Wyoming. He’d never leave.
Except…last time they’d crossed paths, he’d mentioned feeling untethered. She thought he’d found an anchor in Addie. But now he made it sound like she—Aurora Rose Wetzler—was the missing piece in his life.
Don’t get your hopes up.
Confused by his mixed signals and the stupid girlish hope that things would work out between them like they were supposed to, she scooted off the rock.
“Rory. Don’t go.”
“I can’t stay here with you, Dalton. I need…time.”
“I get that. When can we talk again?”
“I leave for Laramie on Sunday.”
She started up the path toward her house.
“Don’t leave things like this. Please.”
When had Dalton McKay ever said please? She found herself stopping and facing him. “When do you want to talk?”
“Come by my house tomorrow night. We’ll figure it out this time. I swear.”
But she’d showed up to find him gone. No note. No text. No nothing. Just…gone.
And he’d stayed gone for over three years.
She’d been right not to trust him, not to pin her hopes on that one perfect moment they’d shared—because maybe it hadn’t been as perfect as she’d reme
mbered.
Question was: what did he want from her now?
Chapter Three
Dalton had agreed to meet his brothers at Brandt and Jessie’s place. Things had been strained between them at the rehab hospital the previous afternoon. They hadn’t recognized him at first, and then they’d given him a rash of crap about turning into a Montana mountain man. There’d been a thread of unease in all their conversations, so it’d be interesting to see if they’d hide their hostility when they weren’t in public or whether they’d toss it down like a gauntlet.
A few things had changed at Brandt and Jessie’s house. A jungle gym, a tree house and a swing set were situated behind a new two car garage. A line of trees had been planted on the left side of the house. The expanded garden was enclosed by a five-foot-high fence. The improvements over the years allowed Dalton to forget he’d been raised here. Much happier memories were being made in the house these days.
Tell’s truck was parked next to Brandt’s. An SUV, probably Georgia’s, was lined up behind it.
For some reason Dalton’s gut knotted climbing the steps.
Jessie opened the door and threw herself into his arms. “Dalton McKay, I was beginning to wonder if you’d ever come home.” She squeezed him tightly—as if she really was happy to see him. When she pulled back, she hastily wiped her tears.
His stomach dropped. “Jess—”
“He missed you, okay?” she whispered. “We all did. It’s been harder on him than he’ll ever admit. Yes, we have our own family now, but that doesn’t mean you aren’t…” She stopped. Inhaled. Smiled. “Sorry. Too soon for this.” She reached up and ruffled his beard. “Brandt warned me, but it in no way prepared me for how different you look.”
“Grizzly Adams is one of the least offensive comparisons that’ve been made,” he said dryly.
“Come in. We’re all bustin’ our buttons for you to meet the newest McKays.”
Dalton wiped off his boots and shrugged out of his Carhartt jacket. When he looked up, he saw Tell with a black-haired boy cocked on his hip.
“Jackson, that’s your Uncle Dalton. You wanna go say hi?”
Jackson yelled, “No!”
“Our two-year-old’s favorite word,” Georgia said behind him.
He turned and grinned at his pregnant sister-in-law. “Is it my brother’s goal to keep you knocked up?”
Georgia hugged him. “It’s a McKay plot, since Jess has another bun in the oven too.”
“Holy sh…shoot.” He glanced over at his brother and sis-in-law. “Congrats.”
Then two boys raced into the room and Jackson squealed to be let down. They skidded to a stop in front of Dalton. Hard to believe the last time he’d seen Tucker the kid had just started walking. He’d never met Wyatt, Brandt and Jessie’s two-and-a-half-year-old son. Tucker looked like Brandt, dark-haired and stocky. Wyatt had lighter hair and Jessie’s hazel eyes. They didn’t look like brothers.
That thought sliced him to the bone because everyone used to say that about him and his brothers.
Not the time nor the place to think about this.
He crouched down. “Hey, guys.”
Jackson joined his cousins in staring at Dalton.
“Why you got that long beard?” Tucker asked. “You hidin’ scars on your face or something?”
Dalton tried not to laugh when he heard Jessie’s sharp, “Tucker McKay, you will apologize to your uncle right now.”
“Sorry.” But Tucker’s narrowed gaze took in every inch of Dalton’s face like he was checking for evidence.
“I don’t s’pose you remember me,” Dalton asked. “I used to babysit you sometimes.”
Tucker shook his head.
“Uncle Dalton sent you the rhinoceros horn, the maracas and the stuffed toy elk,” Jessie prompted.
“Really? That was you?”
“Yep.”
“Where’d you get all that stuff?”
“Picked it up in my travels.”
“Cool. Did you give Wyatt that stuffed grizzly bear?”
“Yes sir. And I gave you—” he poked Jackson in the belly, “—the stuffed buffalo.”
Jackson blinked at him. Up close the kid was a perfect mix of Tell and Georgia. Black hair, icy blue eyes.
“Why’re you here?” Tucker asked.
“Because Grandpa is in the hospital,” Brandt said.
“Are you really my dad’s brother?”
“I really am. I’m Uncle Tell’s brother too.”
“Not the one who died. That’s Landon’s dad, Luke.” He frowned. “How come I don’t remember you?”
“I’ve been gone a while.”
“Why?”
Jesus. Did this kid ever stop asking questions?
“Why don’t you boys go play? You can grill Uncle Dalton later.”
Tucker raced off, Wyatt and Jackson right behind him.
Dalton stood and looked at Brandt and Jessie. “How many questions do you answer a day?”
“Seems like a million. Let’s sit in the dining room.”
Jessie sliced up coffee cake and poured coffee. No one was talking so he looked around the room. How many meals had he eaten in here growing up? How many times had he tiptoed past Casper’s captain’s chair at the head of the table, hoping not to be noticed?
“Dalton?”
He glanced up at Jessie. “The place looks good. This house finally has a happy vibe.”
“We need to talk about Dad,” Tell said, “but I wanna hear what you’ve been up to and why the fuck we haven’t seen you for over three years.”
Georgia whapped his biceps. “That is not a good way to start a conversation, Tell, and you know it.”
Tell was giving Dalton the steely-eyed stare that reminded him a little too much of Casper.
“Sorry, Georgia, but I’m with Tell on this.” Brandt pointed with his fork. “You’re here, so start talkin’.”
“I don’t know where to start.”
“The last time we saw you in person was a week after you pulled your runaway groom routine,” Tell reminded him.
“But the last time we actually saw your face was on TV a few months later when you were in the celebrity poker match with Chase,” Brandt added.
Dalton sipped his coffee. “So you, along with the rest of the country, watched me lose the million dollar pot?”
“Made me sick to my stomach just thinkin’ about gambling with that much cash,” Brandt said.
“The buy-in was a hundred grand, right?” Tell asked.
“Yep. Winner-takes-all tournament. Half the buy-in was my money. Chase’s sponsors put the other half up. I’m assuming everyone in the McKay family believed Chase lent me the money and I lost it?”
His brothers and their wives looked at each other.
Just another reason he’d gotten a cool reception from his uncles yesterday. “Due to confidentiality contracts, Chase couldn’t confirm or deny to anyone where the buy-in cash came from. My gag order expired two years after the event. So now I can tell you that I was paid to lose.”
“What? That was all faked?”
Dalton shook his head. “No, they’re real poker games with real stakes. But world championship poker is big business, lots of fans, turning players into celebrities. The operators specialize in holding tournaments in small casinos. Which means advertising dollars pay for most the revenue. A regular Joe can see how the pros do it.”
“How’d you get roped in?” Tell asked.
“Chase had been asked to play a trio of celebrity couple tournaments and the sponsors were expecting Ava, but she had to back out because she was scouting movie locations. I’d hung out with Chase at the poker tables in Vegas after the PBR World Finals. He’d seen me play and knew I had the cash for buy-in, knew I was traveling around, so he asked me to fill in.” Dalton grinned. “We thought it’d be hilarious if I showed up in drag—blond wig, evening dress, the whole nine yards—trying to look like Ava, but Ava nixed that idea.”
Ge
orgia and Jessie laughed.
“Chase got knocked out early on. I kept playing the angle that I was his rube cousin from Wyoming. The crowds ate it up. Hell, I even had folks askin’ for my autograph, which was weird. An hour before the final round started, the TV producers and sponsors called a meeting with me. Said they wanted me to throw the game because my opponent, JT Judson, was riding the comeback wave and it’d make for better drama if he won.”
“Did you tell them to stick it?” Tell demanded.
“Nope. Luckily Chase was with me. He’s used to dealing with them TV types. He said I’d go all in if I got my seed money back and if they put me on the tour for at least a dozen stops. So basically I got to play in a million-dollar poker tournament for free. For the next eight months I ran the circuit. Then I’d had enough.”
“You disappeared.”
Dalton nodded. “I’d had my fifteen minutes of fame and that was fourteen minutes too many.”
“Is that why you grew the beard? So you weren’t recognizable?” Tell asked innocently.
“Fuck. Off.”
Tell laughed.
Brandt said, “What did you do after that?”
“Yeah, the I’m fine texts once a month and the occasional package from some weird place overseas really doesn’t tell us what you’d been doin’.”
“After I had extra cash I made a list of all the places across the world I wanted to go and I went there.”
“By yourself?”
“Yep.”
“Bro, ever since you were a little kid you never liked doin’ stuff by yourself.”
“Because I never had to. I always had you guys or our McKay cousins.” Or Rory. “When I got older, I had girls—” he flashed Tell a sly grin, “—not as many girls as I’d claimed.”
Tell gave him an odd look—as if surprised that Dalton had admitted that.
“I met a few people in my travels, so I wasn’t always alone, but the majority of the time, yeah, I was and I preferred it.”
His brothers wouldn’t understand why he’d chosen to redefine himself without his family’s influence. It’d been scary shit, being forced to do things on his own. No one telling him to feed cattle or move cattle or mow the hayfield. No one telling him to fix fence, or demanding explanations for how he conducted his social life. He’d been one hundred percent in charge of every decision he made every day. It’d been overwhelming at first, especially in countries where he didn’t speak the language—he’d almost turned tail and run home. But he’d stuck it out.
Redneck Romeo (Rough Riders) Page 3
