by S. M. Shade
We fill the cart with curtain rods, window treatments, and various other necessities. While I’m trying to decide on a shower curtain for the bathroom, Neal plants a soft kiss on my temple. “I’m going to go next door to get some paint. Meet you in the car?”
I smile up at him. He’s been patient as I’ve meandered around the store, trying to find the perfect things to make the new house a home. I’m sure he’s dying to escape. “Sure, I’ll just be a few more minutes.”
His chuckle tells me he knows as well as I do that’s bullshit. But really, we have to look at this shower curtain every day. It needs to be perfect.
Finally, I settle on a pretty yellow one and head to the cashier. As I’m checking out, I see the last person I want to see, loitering outside the plate glass window. He has his back to me, but I’d know that haircut and jacket from anywhere. Clint. And I have to walk past him.
Forcing my chin high and prepared to fight, I make my way out of the store with my bags in hand. My heart leaps into my throat when I look at him and see something new. His left leg below the knee has been replaced with a blue metal prosthetic. It hasn’t been that long since I saw him, so what the hell happened?
The words jump out before I can think about them as I approach him. “Oh my god, what happened to your leg?”
My gaze is fixated on his prosthetic until I hear a very unfamiliar voice reply, “I lost it to cancer a few years ago, but I don’t see how it’s any of your business.”
My eyes climb slowly to his face, and I want to die.
Or at least be dragged away, maybe into that nearby sewer grate, where no one can see me. Where is that killer clown when you need him?
It’s not Clint.
The angry eyes that pierce me are brown, not blue. “Oh god. I’m so sorry. I thought you were someone else. Someone I knew. My ex, who ran out on his kid. I’m so so sorry.”
My rambling response brings a slight smile to the man’s face, but I don’t stick around to see what he says. My face is burning up, and I just want to get away. I rush into the parking lot, squinting against the sun glinting off the cars, and frantically try to remember where Neal parked. Oh, I hope he didn’t see that.
Finally, I spot his car and damn it, I can make out a figure in the driver’s seat. At least he couldn’t have heard what I asked the guy. Eyes on the pavement, I rush over, throw the back door open and toss in the bags. I jump into the front seat, lay my hand on his knee, and exclaim, “Please get me out of here. I made a total idiot of myself just now.”
Silence descends as I squeeze my eyes shut, waiting to feel the car move me away from the source of my embarrassment. “Uh…Ma’am?”
What the?
My eyes pop open at yet another unfamiliar voice, and I’m afraid to turn my head. Because if what I suspect is true, I will never be able to forget this day. Finally, I look over at the man in the driver’s seat. The man who looks nothing like Neal because he isn’t Neal because I’m in the wrong damn car.
I don’t know what’s worse. Realizing I still have my hand on his knee, hearing this man chuckle, or looking over to the next car that happens to be the same model and color, where Neal sits, laughing his damn ass off.
This should be the moment I wake up because there’s no way I can accept what has happened in the last five minutes. “Sorry,” I mumble. “Wrong car.” I’m out in a flash and I fling myself into Neal’s car, wishing it was a bottomless abyss.
Pulling my knees up, I drop my head and cover my face. “I can’t believe I did that.”
Neal’s laugh echoes around me. “I should be insulted you don’t know what I look like.”
“The sun was in my eyes and…please, just get me out of here,” I moan, not uncovering my face.
There’s a tap on Neal’s window, and I peek up long enough to see the man standing there with a smile, waving my bags I left in his back seat. This really can’t get any worse.
Neal takes the bags and thanks the man. Finally, I feel the car move, but I don’t look up until we’re parked at my apartment again.
Neal’s hand creeps onto my leg. “V?”
“Hmm?”
“You going to go turtle for the rest of the day?” Amusement rings in his voice.
“The rest of the year sounds better.”
Chuckling, he squeezes my knee. “Come on, so you got in the wrong car. I was the only one who saw it.”
“Yeah,” I scoff. “Only the person whose opinion means the most to me.” As usual, I don’t give the words much thought before they leap past my lips.
When I look up, a grin is inching across his face. The corners of his eyes wrinkle a tiny bit as the grin turns to a full, incredulous smile. “My opinion means the most to you?”
“What? No.” My reply is light and teasing. “Of course not. Why would I care what an old man like you thinks of me?”
His hands land on my cheeks as he plants his lips on mine for a long, sensuous kiss. When we break apart, he says, “Secret’s out, V. You love me. Worship the ground I walk on. It’s understandable. I’m awesome.”
Giggling, I shake my head. “Can we just get out of the car and pretend the last hour never happened?”
“We can get out of the car. Can’t promise the rest.”
Once we unload our purchases, we take a seat in my living room. He sits back on the couch, and reaches to play with the ends of my hair. “We need to find a babysitter for this weekend.”
“We do?”
“Mmm Hmm. I’m taking you on a date. We’ve never been anywhere without the kids.”
He’s right. It hadn’t even occurred to me. I cuddle against him “Well, we never do anything the typical way, do we?”
“What fun would that be?”
Neal doesn’t mention the date again until he tells me that Noble agreed to stay at my apartment to watch the kids. “Are you okay with leaving Aiden with him for twenty-four hours?”
“Yeah, Aiden loves Noble. He’ll have a blast.” I peek up at him. “Where are we going?”
“You’ll see.”
“Tease. I need to know what to wear.”
He slips his hand under my hair, running his fingers across the back of my neck. It always drives me crazy and he knows it. “Comfortable clothes. No dresses as much as I’d love to peel you out of one. You’ll want to bring a swimsuit.”
The suspense is killing me, and he grins at my impatience when I try to get him to say more. “Just go pack a bag. Noble will be here in an hour. I’ll go tell the kids.”
An hour later, we’re on our way, and I have no idea where we’re going as we pull onto the highway. “How long is the drive?”
“A couple of hours.”
I pester him on and off throughout the next two hours, but he won’t tell me anything until he turns off the highway and onto a winding country road and I exclaim, “A lake? Did you rent us a cabin or something?”
“Better,” he replies with a grin. “A cabin cruiser.”
Excited, I sit up and crane my neck to see the lake behind the tree line as it blurs past. “We’re going on a boat? I’ve never been on a boat.”
He parks at a Marina and stares at me. “Really? Not even a pedal boat, canoe, nothing?”
“No, Mom can’t swim so we didn’t do much water stuff when I was young.”
His face glows with happiness at getting to show me something new. “You’re going to love spending the night on the lake.”
Spending the night? Out on a pitch dark lake? The idea suddenly sounds as terrifying as exhilarating, but there’s no way I’ll let him see my nervousness. “We’re going to sleep on a boat?” What kind of boat is a cabin cruiser? And what if I need the bathroom? A thousand questions run through my head as we make our way inside and Neal makes arrangements with the man renting us the boat.
When we’re lead out to the Cabin Cruiser, my eyes widen in appreciation. It’s not the tiny boat I was expecting. I could easily spend a weekend on it and be comfortable. The deck is
large, with plenty of seating and easy access in and out of the water. A few steps lead down to a small kitchen, bathroom, and bed.
“This is amazing,” I squeal! “I could live here.”
Neal laughs at my enthusiasm, and we unload the trunk of his car. He’s thought of everything. A cooler of food and drinks, sunblock, towels, anything we might need for the next twenty-four hours.
“We should charge our phones first,” I caution. “In case the kids call tonight.”
“There’s a generator. We’ll have electricity.”
A firm breeze whispers over my skin, easing the burn of the sun as Neal steers the boat out of its slip and starts across the lake. It couldn’t be a more beautiful day for this and I can’t wipe the smile from my face while I watch all the activity around us.
The lake hosts a lot of fisherman, people on jetskis, and an array of boats I have no names for. “We’ll drive around a little and find a quiet place,” Neal says.
If I wasn’t already a hundred percent in love and lust with this man, seeing him like this would do it. Stripped down to nothing but a pair of shorts, he guides the boat with such confidence, a serene smile planted on his lips. He looks right at home.
The sun makes his blue green eyes shine and the wind whips his wavy hair around, making me want to run my hands through it. “You look so damn sexy right now,” I announce, and his smile expands. Steering us to a little cove, he kills the engine. We’re far enough away from the other boaters and people that we can hear the sound of the waves lapping at the boat. A woodpecker hammers away in the forest nearby, and dragonflies hum over our heads.
Lying back on the cushioned bench, I breathe, “It’s like paradise.”
“Wait until tonight, when the stars come out,” he says, taking a seat on the deck and leaning his back against the bench. He turns his head and I capture his lips with mine. They’re soft and warmed by the sun. The usual desperate, passionate frenzy that always exists when we come together isn’t present. This is different. It’s a leisurely, sweet kiss that makes my heart swell with emotions I’ve tried not to feel.
When we part, I press another soft kiss against his bottom lip and murmur, “I love you.”
His fingers thread through my hair and his gaze locks on mine. “I love you, V.” He shifts and slips his hand into mine. “You haven’t said anything, but I know moving in together makes you nervous. I’m sure it’ll take some adjustment on everyone’s part, but I swear, we’ll make it work.”
“I know.” I sit up and slide down to sit beside him. “It just feels a little too good to be true sometimes.”
“Moving in together?”
“I always wanted a family. It was always just me and mom, and, well…you’ve met her. Then I thought I had a chance at it with Clint, which was a huge mistake. Well, not completely, because I had Aiden, but now he’s growing up the same way, with only me for support.”
“Not anymore,” he says. “I’ll treat him like my own. We’ll be a family. Even if you never agree to marry me.”
Chuckling, I look up at him. “Is that really what you want?”
“Yes.” There’s no hesitation in his response. “But only when I know you want it too.”
“It’s not you. I just…never saw the point in marriage. It’s a bit creepy. It’s like, I love you so much I’m going to get the government involved so you can’t leave.”
He throws his head back and his laugh echoes over the lake. “That’s one way to look at it.”
“How do you see it?”
“Marriage is standing in front of everyone you care about and telling the world that this is the person you want to be with forever. It’s not swearing to the government, or a god, or even those watching, but to each other. Then, when the hard times come and there are days you might worry that it’s all falling apart, you can remember that oath and know the other person isn’t going anywhere. That trouble will pass, and love will still be there.”
“Even though divorce exists?”
“So does death, but you don’t spend your life anticipating it.”
We’re quiet for a few moments as I mull over his words. A sudden squeal from a woman on a passing boat breaks the silence. “A year,” I murmur.
“What?”
“Once we’ve lived together a year, if you want to get married, I’m willing.”
A smile leaps across his face. “I’m holding you to that.”
A bead of sweat runs down my side, and I stand up, stripping off my shirt and shorts to reveal the bikini underneath. “Go for a swim with me?”
I don’t have to ask him twice.
# # #
We sit cuddled together, watching the descending sun throw a million sparkles over the water, putting an end to one of the best days of my life. One of those I know I’ll always remember.
Goosebumps race across my skin, and Neal kisses my neck as I shiver. “Come on, let’s go dry off and put some clothes on.”
While we’re getting changed, Aiden calls to say goodnight, and I put him on speakerphone.
“Can I stay up another hour?” he begs.
“What did Noble say?”
“That there’s only so much fun he can take in one night, but that don’t make sense! Fun is good!”
“So is sleep. So be good and go to bed. I love you.”
“Fine,” he grumbles. “Love you too.”
“Let me talk to Noble.”
There’s some scrambling around before Noble says, “Hey.”
“Hey, everything going okay?”
“Yeah, they’re fine. Except Aiden broke the soap dish off the shower wall, and I have no clue how that happened. Something about Spiderman. Your boy could turn a rock inside out.”
Neal smiles at me as he pulls out a blanket. “So, you’ve had too much fun?”
“Oh yeah. I just listened to a ten minute argument because Bailey asked him ‘What rhymes with door?’ and he said ‘No, it doesn’t.’”
Neal and I both crack up.
“But everything’s good. They’re going to bed now, and I’m calling to get a vasectomy.”
I hear Aiden pipe up in the background. “Is that a video game? I want to play vasectomy!”
“Did you do a lot of drugs when you were pregnant?” Noble asks. “I’m not judging.”
“Good night, Noble. Thanks again,” I laugh.
Neal and I are still chuckling over Aiden and Noble when we make our way back up onto the deck. My laughter is cut short when I’m struck by the beauty of the world that seems to have transformed over the last half hour.
In the distance, I can see the lights of a few other boats, but we’re too far away to hear anything but the sounds of nature around us. The wind has died down and the night is warm and fragrant with the scent of the forest around us.
The true magic of the scene though, comes from the sky. Stars burst across it, closer, clearer, and in greater numbers than I’ve ever seen. The calm water reflects them, making it hard to tell which way is up.
Neal sets a battery-operated lantern beside the foam mat he’s already spread out on the deck, but doesn’t turn it on. While I marvel at our surroundings, he goes below, returns with pillows and a blanket, and makes us a cozy spot to relax.
Stretching out, he pulls me down beside him and we stare at the sky. I could stay right here forever. “It’s so beautiful. You can even see the milky way.”
“I loved spending the night on a boat when I was a kid. My parents would sleep in the hull and I’d sleep under the stars.”
I cuddle up to him, pressing my cheek to his chest. “Did you ever get woken up by rain?”
“No, but a bird shit on me once, right in my hair. I slept through it, but my dad’s laughter woke me up.”
“Are you serious?”
He grins down at me. “Absolutely. I was mad because he made me get up and jump in the lake to wash it off. It was freezing, and I was still half asleep.”
He stops my giggle with a soft k
iss. Our lips part for a second, and our eyes meet, before we kiss again, and his hands wander over my body. There’s no urgency this time, no desperation to get all we can of the other because we have limited time, or the kids might catch us, but the passion is overpowering as always.
Our clothing ends up piled at our feet, and I close my eyes at the foreign sensation of the night air blowing across my naked body. It’s exhilarating because it feels like we’re out in the open, but we can’t actually be seen or heard by any of the other boaters in the distance.
When he slides inside me with a tenderness I’ve not felt before, my head tilts back, and a quiet moan escapes. We aren’t fucking this time. He makes love to me—slow, steady, mind blowing love—while the stars shine down on us and the boat rocks with our joined bodies.
We roll over, and I ride him at the same pace, bending over to kiss the rasp of his stubble covered jaw. He sits up and wraps his arms around me. Moving together for what feels like hours, we both slowly build until we come together, my face buried in his neck. I don’t know how long we lie there after, cuddled together, watching the stars nightly journey across the sky, but it’s the most peaceful thing I’ve ever experienced.
A drop in temperature finally chases us inside where we curl up in bed together. Maybe it was the sun, the swimming, or the sex, but exhaustion sends me to sleep almost immediately. I awake once in the middle of the night to hear the steady beat of rain above us. It wakes Neal as well, and without moving from his position behind me, he silently slips inside me again. The sound of the rain, the rocking of the boat, and another slow, devastating orgasm puts me right back out.
In the morning, I’m not sure how much of my memory is true and what was a dream, it was all so perfect.
Chapter Fifteen
Neal
“Over here, buddy!” I call to Aiden, and he pulls his wagon over to me. It’s full of items that Veronica is selling in the yard sale.
