“Sophie,” I hear Paige say and I turn to look at her.
“I need to get some air,” I say getting up and walking outside of the door. I lean against the wall on the outside of the bar and I can’t get out of my thoughts. I have been looking for Austin for months. I had needed to tell him things, to explain things to him, I had been trying to find him but I wasn’t expecting to see him here now. This had completely thrown me off. I pull myself together minutes later and walk back into the bar. When I walk back inside I walk up to the bar and grab another drink as it’s handed to me and I turn around and look to him. He’s a natural performer and I remember sitting in his house and him playing the guitar to me, I remember him singing karaoke all of the time, I should have seen it last year that he was natural performer. I smile when I realize that he is living his dream. That he quit his great job to follow his dream. I can see the sparkle in his eye as he sings along with his written songs. A slow song begins to play through the speakers as I sit back down at the table and Sarah sighs.
“This is one of my favorites. Austin wrote it for the girl that broke his heart.” I look down at the ground and Paige looks over to me and whispers.
“He wrote you a song.”
“Sarah, how many songs did he write about this girl?” I hear Paige ask Sarah.
“A lot, that’s what most of his songs are about. They don’t perform them all because most of them are slower and they need more faster paced songs.”
The instrumental breaks and I hear his voice flow through the speakers. I cannot grasp the song, knowing it is about me, until the chorus comes:
I know that we said it ended that night
I thought it would be easier without you in my sight
But girl I couldn’t be more wrong
You fill my dreams all night long
Your laugh still haunts me
Your eyes are burned into me
I can still feel your breath on my neck
And no one can compare to you
You always talked about the story bookending
I will never be able to have that without you
I stop and look at Paige who smiles at me. I feel my eyes filling up with tears as Sarah looks to us confused.
“It’s a beautiful song isn’t it?” she asks us. I don’t say a word and I hear Paige give a half assed answer, and then I hear them go on break. Sarah gets up to walk over to see Brandon and I look to Paige’s wide eyes.
“Paige, what do I do?” I’m at a loss.
“Go talk to him.” She tells me.
“No, I can’t, did you just hear that?” I plead with her.
“Yes you can, he still loves you.”
“That song could have been written a long time ago.” I tell her.
“You heard what Sarah said, he hasn’t dated anyone since he has gotten here.” I know that she is right.
“Yeah and he never dated before me either.” I challenge her statement.
“Look, Soph, this is what is going to happen you can either go talk to him or I will call him over.”
“Paige,” I whine to her.
“Tough love sweetheart, go talk to the one person who you have never been able to get over,” I get up from the table and slowly walk over to him making my way through the crowd. I see the small group standing around the bar with a handful of girls surrounding them. I see Sarah smile at me as I approach him and I lean in next to him as he leans on the bar.
“Fate has a funny way of working out, doesn’t it?” is the only thing that I can think to say and the instant the words fall from my mouth I wish that I could take them back. I see the confusion spread onto his face and then he slowly pans his head over to me and I smile, “Hi.”
“Sophie,” his eyes widen and I pull my lip with my teeth. “What are you doing here?” he asks and I can’t seem to determine if he is excited or upset to see me.
“Can we talk somewhere else?” he nods his head and we walk outside. Sarah looks at me confused and I shrug to her. We walk outside and stop at a bench and he sits down facing the street. I sit down and fiddle with my thumbs, I’m unbearably nervous. “I am really nervous.” I’m not sure why I say it.
“Well, it’s been a while since we have seen one another.” He says matter-of-factly.
“And how am I going to top that song.” He smiles nervously and looks away from me, “No, Austin, it was beautiful.” I say putting my hand to his arm.
“Thanks, it has helped me. Anyways what are you doing here? Your hair looks good I didn’t really recognize you at first until you came up to me.”
“Did you see me before I came up to you?” I wonder out loud.
“Yeah, I saw you walk out and I thought to myself, ‘Wow, she looks a lot like Soph,’ but the hair threw me off, plus I tend to do that a lot.”
“Do what?” I ask him.
“Think people are you.” I don’t know how to respond to his confession and we sit on the bench not talking for a moment, “So, what are you doing here?”
“Well the business really flourished in Miami we had a few opportunities to start a branch up here. So we did. I’ve been trying to find you.” the last part is what I was really trying to say. “I went to see your dad. He told me you never gave him your new number.” He shrugs his shoulders. I hear the door open and see Brandon and Sarah walk outside.
“Austin, we have to go back on.” He nods his head to them.
“Soph, I’m sorry but I have to go back in. Will you stick around until after the show ends? I would love to catch up with you.” I nod my head back to him and we walk back inside. He hugs me before he walks up to the stage and I smile. His scent engulfs my senses and so many memories are brought back to me.
Chapter Nineteen
I wake up feeling like hell and not being able to remember anything after Austin when back on stage, I was now a light weight, but I guess that’s what going over a year without drinking will get you. I walk out of my bedroom and Mar is grinning at me like crazy.
“What is that smirk for?” I ask her.
“Well, I see that you ran into Austin last night.”
“How did you know?” I respond quickly to her.
“Because he was the one that got you home last night; Paige wasn’t ready to leave and he made sure to bring you home. He left this for you.” she holds up something in her hand.
“Did he find out?” I ask her.
“No, it was late, everything was cleaned up.” She tells me slightly looking down at the ground.
“Good, I have to be the one that tells him.”
“I know, it’s good to see him. He looks kind of happy.”
“He does, doesn’t he?” she nods her head and then hands me the piece of paper. I open it and it has his address and number underneath. I punch the number into my phone and start to hear the ringing. I hear a sleepy voice answer the phone.
“I’m sorry, did I wake you?” I say into the receiver as I walk out onto my patio.
“Technically no, I have been trying to decide for the last half hour if I should get out of bed.” It makes me laugh a bit. “I’m glad that you called.”
“Me to,” I smirk to no one in particular, “Do you want to get breakfast?” Shit, I forgot to ask Mar, Do you mind? I whisper to her. And she shakes her head that she doesn’t.
“That sounds good. There is a great diner around the corner from your place. Meet you there in twenty minutes?” he asks me. I can feel the butterflies in my stomach starting to move around.
“Sounds good,” He gives me the name of the diner and in twenty minutes I am dressed and walking down the stairs heading to go and see him.
When I see him he smiles to me but it seems a little hurt. It breaks my heart I can only hope that I can make him happy again. That he won’t be mad at me when he finds out.
As I approach him his smiles widens.
“This is crazy right?” he smiles at me, wrapping me in a hug and talking loud enough to I can her him as we close the
gap between us, “One point six million people in Manhattan and we run into one another the first week that you are here.” I smile at me.
“Three times,” I tell him and he looks at me confused.
“What?” He asks somewhat amused.
“Savannah is a mediocre city and I was there for one night we ran into one another, Miami we lived down the street from one another, and now Manhattan.”
“Fate?” he cocks his head to the side and smile to me.
“We’ll see.” We walk over to a table and sit down as a waitress comes up and take our drink order. “Thanks you taking care of me last night.” I say as the drinks are sat down in front of us, “I actually haven’t drank in a while, so it all caught up to me really fast.” He looks to me and smiles.
“It was not a problem Soph, there was no way I could leave you there like that.” He pauses and looks down to his hands, “What did you mean last night by you were trying to find me?”
“I tried to, but it was like you dropped off the earth.”
“Something like that,” he says using my infamous line.
“You tried not to be found?” maybe he was still mad at me for everything that happened.
“I believe in fate Soph, I knew that it wouldn’t matter if you knew how to find me or not.”
“Look, Austin, there is something that I really need to tell you.” I say as my phone begins to ring and I see it’s Mar calling me, “I’m sorry, I have to take this.”
“Hello,” I speak directly into the phone.
“Hey Soph, its Kaylee,” I hear her panicked tone in the receiver.
“What about her.” I match her panicking.
“I think that she’s had an allergic reaction. We are almost to the hospital.” She says panicking.
“Alright which one,” I jump up as she tells me that name of the closest hospital, and I see the confused look spread onto Austin’s face.
“I’m sorry, I’ve got to go, do you know where the hospital is?” I ask taking out a couple bills for the drinks and placing it on the table.
“Hospital? It’s just around the corner.” He stands up with me as I sprint out of the door and he manages to keep up with me. “Soph, what’s going on? Who is in the hospital?” he asks as I slow in front of the doors.
“Austin, this is what I need to tell you. You can either walk in there with me, and find out or you can wait and find out just like I planned to tell you.” he looks bewildered.
“Sophie, what are you talking about?” He’s confused.
“Decide, Austin, because if you go in there’s no turning back.”
“I’m going in there with you.” he says and reaches down, lacing his fingers with mine.
“Alright, I didn’t want you to find out this way though.” We walk through the sliding doors and I sprint up the stairs knowing that I could beat the elevator up to the floor that Mar had text me to tell me that they were on.
“Kaylee Tice.” I almost shout to the nurse and she shows me back to the room. I see Mar come out of the curtain and she smiles to me.
“Soph, she’s alright, we got here in just enough time and they gave her a cortisone shot. They are just running some test to make sure what it was. But she’s fine; you can go and see her.” She smiles to me and then looks up to Austin, with a worried expression.
“Thanks Mar,” I turn looking to Austin and I stumble over my words a few times as I look at him. “Austin, this is what I was trying to tell you.” and I nod into the curtained area and he still looks confused. I open the curtain and his eyes widen and I watch as his lips slightly part open. I know that he is stunned. I had the exact expression when I read that test.
“Sophie,” he gasps my name.
“Austin, this is Kaylee.” He looks stunned as he walks over to the chair on the side of her bed and looks up to me as I walk over to her. “She’s nine months old.”
“That means-,” he lets his sentence fall and I see him trying to figure out the math in his head.
“February,” He stares at her and I watch as his eyes soften.
“She’s mine?” he looks back up to me still stunned.
“Yes.”
Chapter Twenty
“I tried to find you when I found out, I even went and talked to Jack, but he didn’t know where you were either.” He just stares at me and I wonder what he is thinking, “I’m not expecting anything from this I just want you to know. You have the right to know, the right to decide what you want to do.”
“Soph, I’m not sure what to say.” His eyes fall back to her.
“Just take some time and process it. I’ve had a lot more time than you have to deal with it and I know that I just dropped it on you.” he nods his head letting me know that he understands what I am trying to tell him.
Kaylee sleeps for an hour before she wakes up and when she does almost immediately she looks over at Austin with the identical blue eyes, completely confused.
“It’s like looking into a mirror.” He says staring at her as she continues to look at him.
“I know, she looks just like you.”
We don’t talk for the rest of the afternoon, but he sits with me until we are able to go home and then walks us up the stairs to our apartment.
“It was a pleasure to meet you Kaylee,” he says rubbing her head and then looks to me and says, “It’s really great to see you Soph, I’ll call you.” he says to me leaning over and kissing me on the cheek and I watch, leaned against my door frame, as he walks back down the hall. I can’t help but be reminded of the first night that I met him.
He doesn’t call. In fact, a week goes by and it’s now a week and a half later, as I sit in my office; I’m starting to become grouchy.
“So, Sophie, I have been meaning to ask you,” I hear Sarah come into my office, “but how do you know Austin?” I knew that this question was going to come up, but I was expecting it last week after the whole concert incident. I sigh and reach into my drawer where I keep a picture that we took on New Year’s Day right before we left to come home. It was taken the morning after he told me that he loved me. We are laying on the beach laughing. I can’t even remember what about, but the picture has sat in the drawer since he left. I kept all of the pictures that we had taken during our whirl-wind romance. I watch her fingers fold around the picture and her mouth drops. “You’re the girl from Miami.”
“Yeah,” I look down at the desk, “I’ve been looking for him for over a year.”
“You moved your business up here so you could find him?” she asks me.
“Something like that,” I shrug to her and she grins.
“That’s so romantic.” She slumps down into the chair that sits in front of me.
“Well not so much. See the thing is that everything happened so fast with us. Damn, look I’m about to trust in you not to tell anyone this. He knows but I’m waiting for him to decide how he is going to handle it, and no one should know unless he decides that it’s something that he wants. Can you do that?”
“Yes.” Her eyes light up and I can tell that she loves secrets.
“You can’t even tell Brandon.” I make myself perfectly clear just how secret this is.
“Ugh,” she pauses, really thinking it over for a second, “Alright, I won’t tell him.”
“Okay, well I have a child who is nine months old.”
“Alright,” she looks confused for a minutes and then her eyes grow wider, “The baby, it’s Austin’s isn’t it?”
“Yes, he found out the day after the concert. I told him that I wasn’t expecting anything from him which is true, I’m not, but I’ve never stopped thinking about him since he left Miami. I tried to date again before I found out about Kay, but no one seemed to compare to him. There was something wrong with every one of them and my sister started to make fun of me, well with the exception of the guy that was gay and the one that wanted me to pay for dinner.” She laughs a bit, “She started to make fun of me that none of them compared to Austi
n which I why I wouldn’t see any of them again, which is probably mostly true. When he left Sarah, he broke my heart. He changed his number and left it so that no one could find him.”
“Then tell him that.” She says firmly.
“I can’t. I want him to be with me because he loves me and truly wants to be with me not because we have a child.”
“But I know that he still loves you.”
I can’t help but sigh, “Sometimes you can love someone but you can’t be with them.”
“If you till love one another than anything is possible.”
“Maybe, but I don’t want to force it on him.” She nods at me and hands the picture back to me.
“I know it will all work out.”
“How do you know?”
“Because why would fate bring you back together again if you are not meant to be together?”
“I’m not sure. Fate has a funny way of doing things.” I smile to her and she shrugs, walking out of my office.
I feel bad for the way my conversation went with Austin, and I kind of wish that we could talk about things all over again. Every day that I go without talking to him I sleep less and less. I know that it sounds ridiculous but it’s almost as if even though he hasn’t been with us for a year now because he knows everything it has changed my life.
I end up not sleeping tonight and when I finally give myself over to the gods of insomnia and get up I find myself in Kaylee’s bedroom watching her sleep. I know that this is what I’m meant to do with my life. Be a mother to this amazing child. She is my life and always will be. It doesn’t matter if Austin wants to be a part of our life, we will be fine. I will figure out how to manage.
My phone buzzes in my hand and I open it quickly without looking at who is calling.
“Hello,” I whisper walking out of her bedroom and outside onto the balcony.
“Sophie,” I hear the deep sigh.
“Hey, Austin,” I gasp, since he is the last person I would think to call me right now.
Fated Page 13
