by Ava Moreau
And I’m a fucking hypocrite, because I was doing the same damn thing myself, and maybe I’m just mad because that’s easier than feeling embarrassed over getting caught.
This was different than any fight he’d ever had with Jack, for reasons he couldn’t understand. Maybe it was because this time, the stakes were higher. They’d never competed over a girl before. But that wasn’t the whole story. Not at all. Because when he saw Jack angry, his thick shoulders and neck bunching up with the stress, his strong jaw tense and clenched, it made him think about this morning.
Not just this morning. All the times he’d seen Jack’s body. At the gym, in the locker room. Times they’d gone swimming together. Times when they’d just hang out in the summer heat, shirts off, letting the sweat bake off their skin. In some ways, he was as familiar with Jack’s body as he was with his own. But that awareness of it had changed.
The awareness had, in fact, become a kind of hunger. He wanted to see Jack like that again, stripped, sweating, thrusting. It was still a vague thought, just foggy images, tangles of limbs and cocks and mouths, rather than a straightforward fantasy in his head.
But it made his fight all the more awkward, because here was one thing he could never admit: He had somehow become attracted to his best friend.
It was such a relief when Becca appeared on the stairs, such a great distraction from these thoughts, that he felt almost shaky, like the way his arms felt after he’d done too many reps with the weights.
But that relief quickly dried up when he saw the look of consternation on Becca’s face.
“Okay, this whole thing has got to stop,” she said, without any preamble. “I have been listening to you two bitch at each other the whole time you’ve been here. Do we need to talk about this like adults? Or can we just avoid talking about it at all like…um…like the other kind of adults?”
Jack pointed an accusing finger. “He’s here to steal you. Let’s get that out into the open right now. He thinks because he’s moving up to Corinth, he might have a better chance with you than I do, he thinks there’s some spark between you, and—”
“Whoa, wait, what?” she said, her expression turning to one of dismay.
But there was no time for explanations; Trent felt that he needed to defend his honor here, to deflect the accusation. “I never said I was definitely moving to Corinth!” he said. “And besides, you were obviously trying to get here before me. Without telling me, I might add. You’re so fucking obvious, Jack. Just because you finally fucked someone after months of being alone, doesn’t mean—”
“Why don’t we all just shut the hell up for one second?” said Becca, her voice icy cold.
They both looked guiltily at her.
I can’t believe I said all that, thought Trent. What’s gotten into me? What’s gotten into both of us? This isn’t how our friendship works.
Becca, though, seemed to know they needed someone to intervene, before things got ugly. She put her hand on Trent’s arm as a signal to stop talking. It was such a warm hand, so much warmer than the expression on her face.
“Guys, you have got to slow down. You’re talking past me. I’ve been doing laundry for an hour, trying to get the lake water out of my clothes, so I don’t know what’s going on.”
Trent looked sheepishly at Jack. Jack clearly felt bad about all this too. There was pain in his eyes. He hated fighting as much as Trent did. He would fight for what he believed in, for what he wanted. He’d fight hard for it, and heaven help whoever got in his way. But he didn’t want to do it. Didn’t want to hurt Trent.
It amazed Trent how he could read all that on Jack’s face. Years of friendship had given them this kind of unspoken communication.
“Okay,” said Trent. “Here’s the thing. We like you, Becca. A lot. You’re the most interesting, hottest, smartest, most driven person either of us has met in ages. Do I have that right so far, Jack?”
“Fuckin’ A,” said Jack. “You’re the whole package, Becca, and I’m not just saying that because of…well, you know.”
“But we both feel like that,” said Trent, “and that’s the problem. We’ve never had a girl come between us before. It’s like…it’s like we don’t have any practice figuring out how to handle it, how to settle it, how to figure out which one of us gets you, so—”
“Now wait just a damn minute,” she said. “Which one of you gets me? I’m not a carnival prize, you know. You can’t just show off your fucking muscles and think I’m going to swoon and fall into your arms. Jesus, is that what you’re thinking? You think that’s how this works, that you can have a goddamn gentlemen’s agreement over who gets me? That is so fucking sexist. I can’t believe you.”
Trent tried to cut in. “That’s not it, really, it’s not like we were negotiating or—”
“Trent, shut it. Look, guys, we had a one-time thing, okay? That’s it. It was fun. Great way to spend a morning. But it’s never going to happen again. I’m not looking for a boyfriend. I’m not looking for anything. Nothing’s going to happen between us.”
“Nobody said the whole thing had to happen again,” said Jack. “But you can’t stand there and deny there was something between us…”
But he couldn’t finish. He looked guiltily at Trent.
“Or maybe it wasn’t something between us,” he said. “Maybe it was something between you and Trent. I don’t know. I’m no fucking good at analyzing shit. But something happened, some kind of chemistry.”
Trent nodded. “He’s not wrong. I felt it too. But you’re right. If you say you’re not interested in either of us, then that’s the answer. It sucks, but we’ll back off. Right, Jack?”
Jack looked from him to Becca, and finally nodded. “Right. If the answer is no, it’s no.”
Trent shook his head. “I just feel like a fool. How the hell did I misread this so bad?”
“Because you suck at understanding women,” offered Jack helpfully. “That’s why you’re always single.”
“Yeah, thanks, that puts it all into perspective,” said Trent, and he laughed.
Joking about it took a little of the awkwardness away. A little.
He just had to make sure to extinguish any little flicker of hope he had. And there were a lot of flickers, it was like trying to start a fire and sending little sparks all around, hoping one of them will grow into the flame that engulfs everything.
He realized that the experience had left him with hopes that ranged all over the place. From a hope to win Becca as his girlfriend, to a hope that all three of them might wind up in bed again…to a secret hope that he couldn’t name, that maybe while they were in bed, he could do a few more things with Jack.
Never going to admit that one to anybody, though.
“So now that we understand each other,” said Becca, “where do we stand? If I kick your asses out of here like you deserve, I won’t get my packing done, and my sister will come back here and yell at me. But if you keep getting all angry and try to show off how full of testosterone you are, I’m going to start throwing things at you. So here’s what we’re going to do. We are going to go upstairs and do some organizing. We’re going to be civilized about it. You’re going to obey me, do whatever I say, and then it’ll get finished quickly. Got it?”
Jack hung his head like a dog who’d been caught chewing his owner’s shoe. “I got it.”
“And you, Trent? You understand how this is going to work? We’ll get things finished, then maybe we’ll all three hit a restaurant or something to blow off steam, but that’s it. After that, I’m out of here. Understood?”
Trent gave her one final, pained look. Don’t leave. Come on, not yet. But there was nothing he could say. “Understood.”
15
Becca was doing her best to look calm and unruffled. Her speech downstairs had been a pretty good performance, she thought.
Inside she was a wreck.
They were fighting over me. They want me so much, they were about to tear apart their fr
iendship over who could have me.
It made her feel so guilty, coming between such good friends. Good-hearted guys who normally would’ve meant no harm at all, at each other’s throats for a shot at her.
But it wasn’t just guilt. It also made her feel powerful in a way she’d never felt before. Their hunger for her, their willingness to battle for her, made her feel so needed that she felt like her heart might burst.
And that was before she got into how much it turned her on.
That was probably the biggest complication of all. They looked so abashed right now, standing around her room, heads down, guilty looks on their faces. They’d been caught wanting her, and they didn’t know what to do, and it made her want to slide her hand down her pants right this second and play with herself, just thinking about it. Which brought one more thing to mind…
“You know, I had no intention of doing all this while going commando,” she said. “In the future, the next time you two decide to set upon some poor girl, at least have a little pity on her need for underwear. I think these jeans are chafing me.”
Then, without giving them a moment to react to the thought, she turned to the boxes.
She gave them their orders. Open each box. Separate things into stacks. Important business papers went into one stack, old toys into a pile, teenaged nostalgia—diaries, letters—into a third.
They got to work, and spent a while diligently sorting.
But then Trent said, “Oh, hey, it’s the school yearbook.”
At first she didn’t think much of that; this mess contained all her belongings, so of course the yearbook would be in there.
Then she remembered what was in it. “Let me have that!” she said.
Both the boys heard something in her tone, and got wry smiles on their faces.
“Something important in here?” asked Trent, flipping the book open. “Oh…oh my god.”
“Hey! Give me that!” she said, laughing and trying to snatch the book from him.
“Think fast!” said Trent, tossing the book to Jack, who grabbed it out of the air.
“What’s so funny?” he asked, then he looked inside. “Becca, I swear!”
“Guys, this isn’t funny!” Her cheeks were flushed with embarrassment. “Give it back!”
“Why do you have Peter Pickens’ picture circled, with all these little hearts around it? Oh wait, are these your initials and Pete’s, put together?”
“I think she likes him,” said Trent.
Jack held the book over her head; he was tall enough that even when she stood on her toes, she couldn’t reach it. So she did the next best thing, and swatted at his arms with her hands. He totally ignored her, and collapsed onto her bed, saying in a high falsetto, “Oh Petey, I love you so much, I hope one day we can get married!”
“Cut it out, Jack!”
“You’re the only boy in school with bifocals, and nothing turns me on more than bad eyesight!”
She decided to return fire. After all, if Jack was imitating her, she should do the same to him, right? “Sure, sure,” she said, “and you’re all like, Oh Trent, I hope I can suck your cock again, and rub my big muscles all over you! All that time in the gym, I’m just trying to sneak a peek at your package!”
The room went silent so fast that she realized she’d crossed a line.
The look Trent was giving her was absolute, utter pain…while Jack looked like he might explode from embarrassment.
I may have just made a mistake, she said to herself.
But then the other part of her said, Damn, don’t dish it out if you can’t take it.
Of course, this whole day had been about pushing people’s boundaries, seeing how far they could go.
Maybe she’d just pushed a little too hard, that’s all.
She sat on the edge of the bed. “Okay, I’m sorry. Maybe that was too far.”
“Whatever,” said Jack, trying to brush it off, but clearly feeling some turmoil over it.
“No, don’t whatever at me. You can do that to other people, but not me, not after today.” She put her hand on his shoulder and leaned in close. “Let’s talk about this. Let’s just get it out in the open. Did I hit a nerve there? Because obviously there’s more going on in your fight than just competition over me. What happened between you two guys…it’s never happened before, right?”
“Of course it hasn’t,” said Jack.
“Not even close,” said Trent. “I mean, you hear about it sometimes. Guys hanging out, watching porn, jacking off together. Stuff they don’t talk about with their girlfriends.”
Jack nodded. “Sometimes you hear about them jacking each other off. Helping a buddy out or whatever. But we never did that stuff.”
What made the conversation so difficult for Becca was that she could picture it perfectly: Jack and Trent, lounging around, lazily stroking each other’s cocks. Just casual, just something to do on a quiet afternoon. She could feel a twinge deep inside her, thinking about it. Damn it, we are on such dangerous territory. How do I get them to talk about this stuff so the tension gets defused…but without letting them know how much I’m getting off on hearing about it?
“And…okay, I’m going to sound like a therapist here,” she said. “But how did it make you feel?”
“You mean, aside from the orgasm?” asked Trent, and Jack snickered from his spot on the bed.
“Yes, aside from the obvious fact that you came all over us,” said Becca. “How did it make you feel, that it had happened?”
Trent sat on the opposite corner of the bed. “Confused, honestly. This will sound wrong, but I feel like I need to say it, I’m not gay.”
“Me either,” said Jack.
“I don’t think I’m bi, either,” Trent continued. “At least, before today, it never would’ve occurred to me.”
She shrugged. “Is it possible that sometimes things just happen, and we don’t have to label them? Like, I’m not sitting here thinking, Wow I totally misjudged their orientation. I guess what I’m really wondering is…your immediate reaction was that you would both start coming after me, seeing which one of you could win me. But are you thinking about a repeat of what happened between you two?”
There was that silence again. Except now there was no anger or embarrassment in it. Just the silence of thought, or maybe of trying to avoid thinking. Trent was staring at the floor. Jack was lying on his belly, arms crossed, his head down, staring over at the wall. Neither of them would look at her.
“Whatever label you put on it,” she said, “or even if you don’t ever care to name it at all, it was incredible to watch. I’ve never seen anything like it in my life. Was it as hot to do, as it was to watch?”
Grudgingly, Trent shrugged, still not looking at either of them. “Yeah. It was…pretty good.”
For his part, Jack huffed. “It was all right.”
“Just all right?” she asked.
Now Jack looked at her. “Aw, shit, Becca, what do you want me to say? Yes, it was hot. I’ve never tasted a cock before, and I might never do it again, but in that moment, is was fucking great. Is that what you want me to say?”
“Only if it’s true.”
Now Trent was looking at her too. “It’s true. For me, at least. Seeing Jack with my prick in his mouth, his hand on my balls…god, it’s so embarrassing to even talk about. But yeah. That was amazing.” He shot a look at his friend. “In theory, it was amazing, I mean. As far as skill, though, it was only maybe a 4 out of 10.”
“Fuck off,” said Jack, laughing. “That was a solid 9 out of 10 blowjob and you know it.”
“So,” said Becca, “you two were standing around fighting over which of you could have me, like a couple of fucking cavemen, while I’m over here thinking how much I want to see the two of you go down on each other, and how much that would turn me on. Hell, if you two could wrestle while blowing each other, I’d probably just never stop coming.”
Jack acted like he couldn’t believe it. “Seriously? That�
��s what does it for you?”
She realized in an instant she had gone too far. You were supposed to calm them down, not rile them up! Now she was never going to get their attention back on the organizing and packing.
This whole conversation had just been meant to clear the air. She hadn’t started talking to them about it to turn herself on, or to offer for anything to happen between them again!
Or am I just kidding myself? Nothing can happen between us. It’s not part of the plan.
But I’d be lying if I said I didn’t want them both.
Right. This. Second.
“Oh, hell yeah,” she said to Jack, losing the battle inside herself. “I don’t think I could take it, if you two were seriously going at one another, sucking each other off at the same time.”
It was like little lightbulbs came on over their heads. Jack looked at Trent, and Trent looked at Jack, then they both looked at her, evil grins on their faces.
“Oh, no,” she said. She’d gone too far. She knew that. Time to pull things back…but she sensed that might be impossible. She was so wet right now, looking at them. “I know what you’re thinking. But it’s not happening. I’m just talking hypothetically here. We’re just clearing the air. We’re just talking.”
Jack pushed himself up until he was sitting right next to Trent.
“I need to make this really clear to you,” she said. Without realizing it, her hand had slipped under her shirt, and she was gently rolling her hard nipple between finger and thumb. “You two are not going to get it on in this bed. You’re not going to strip each other naked and start licking each other. I see it in your eyes, but it’s not happening! You’re not going to lure me into taking my clothes off again as I lie here next to you, watching you swallowing down each other’s cocks.”
“As I recall,” said Jack, “last time you were the one who took your clothes off first. You’re the one who lured us in.”
“Turnabout is fair play,” said Trent.
Jack reached down, grabbed his shirt tails, and then slowly lifted his shirt over his chest, his hard muscles becoming revealed.
