“In all the time that we’ve been together, we’ve never spoken about the future. I’ve never asked you to make promises or commitments.”
“That’s true.”
“Well, I can’t do it anymore. Nature has a cycle. We humans have a cycle. We’re born, we grow up, we fall in love, get married, have children and retire. I can’t tell myself that just being with you is enough. It’s a lie.” Her voice trailed off and she stared out the window. “Uncle Camden loved my mother enough to let her go, but I’m not that strong.”
“Look, sweetheart, I don’t think I’m ready for marriage. I probably won’t be there for ten years.”
She’d told him she wanted to marry him, and he’d said he didn’t want to get married for another decade. She guessed that it was better than an outright rejection. “So you love me but not enough to make a commitment?”
“I have made a commitment to you, sweetheart. You’ve got my heart.”
“For how long? What’s going to happen next month when you go on a business trip? A year from now? What about five years from now? How long do I wait for you? How long do I close my eyes and blindly hope that one morning you’ll wake up and realize that you can’t live without me?”
“Why are you getting all worked up over nothing?” He stomped on the brakes and threw the car into Park. “Did my mother pressure you into this?”
“No. This is all me. I spent an hour talking with your grandmother. She’s a wonderful woman who’s been married to your grandfather for over fifty years.”
“My grandmother put you up to this, didn’t she?” he asked. “She’s been dying for one of us to have a baby. “
Sasha reached for the door handle. “Unlock the door, Trey.”
“Not until you tell me what I can do to fix this?”
“Show me that you don’t just love me now when I’m in the prime of my life. Make me trust that you’ll love me when I’m old, menopausal, heavyset and cranky. Make me believe that love can last a lifetime.”
He shook his head and he pressed the button to unlock the doors. She yanked the door open and climbed out before the tears came rushing from her eyes. As Sasha walked, she scrambled to pull the keys from her purse, almost dropping them. She turned and glanced through the beveled glass and caught a glimpse of him pulling out of the driveway before her vision blurred and she reached up to wipe away the tears.
She’d come to Atlanta to carry out her uncle’s last will and testament, not to fall in love with a man who wasn’t ready to fully commit to loving her
“Baby, I can’t take it anymore. I have to say something before we leave.”
“What is it, Mom?”
“You’re miserable.”
She managed a half smile. “Of course I’m sad. You’re leaving in the morning.”
“Butterfly, this is the woman who’s changed your diapers and did your hair for prom. I can tell when you’re lying and I can tell when your heart is breaking.”
“Breaking, broken.” She shrugged and took a seat on the window seat. “What’s the difference? I’ll get over it.”
Her mother paused while putting on a pair of silver earrings. “Will you?”
Sasha looked away from her mother and wouldn’t let herself cry. It had been three days since Trey had driven right out of her life. She’d put on a brave face and told her parents their break up was for the best. But her insides still churned from the thought that she would spend the rest of her life missing him, loving him. Her parents’ presence was the only thing that kept her from crawling into bed and hiding under the covers.
“No,” she whispered softly as the image of her mother blurred from the tears in her eyes. “I’m not going to get over this for a long time.”
Her mother turned, crossed the room and sat next to Sasha. “Butterfly, you don’t have to do this. Go to Trey and talk this through.”
“What’s there to talk about? I can’t make him fall in love with me.”
“I agree. Even a fool can see that he’s in love with you and your father may be many things but he’s not a fool. He realizes that Trey loves you.”
“Really?”
She nodded. “Yes. He might not like Trey’s financial status, his political affiliations or his family’s wealth, but he knows that the man would put your needs and welfare above his own. And in the end, that’s all a father wants for his daughter.”
“She’s right, you know.”
Sasha looked up to see her father standing in the doorway. “Daddy, how long have you been standing there?”
“Long enough to tell you that your mother missed a few things. I don’t agree with Trey’s taste in music, either, but the man has impeccable taste in coffee.”
“I thought you’d given up caffeine.”
“A sip now and then can’t hurt.”
Sasha stood up and gave her father a quick hug. “We should be getting ready to go to the aquarium, not standing here talking about something that doesn’t matter.”
Arthur reached out and laid a hand on her arm. “No, it matters. I don’t want you throwing away a chance at happiness because of my pigheadedness.”
Sasha’s brow furrowed. “Daddy?”
“I was wrong in my decision to cut Camden off from my life. I was wrong to let my pride get the better of me and I’m going to regret it until the day I die. But I don’t want you to make my mistake. If you truly love the man and feel that you can start a life with him, you have my blessing.”
Sasha hung her head and shut her eyes, but nothing could have stopped the tears from escaping her closed lids. She hiccupped, as the air seemed stuck in her chest. She collapsed into her father’s arms and sobbed. What did it matter that she had her father’s approval when the man she loved didn’t love her back?
Chapter 21
Trey sat forward in his courtside seat and stared forward instead of watching the player run to the other end of the Phillips Arena basketball court. The roar of the crowd with the action hot and time ticking away couldn’t pull him out of the funk he’d fallen in since he’d last seen Sasha. He’d sent her roses and chocolate only to get back an envelope with the platinum ankle bracelet he’d giver her to celebrate their one month anniversary.
“All right, Trey. I’ve had enough.”
He turned and looked at Jared. “Enough of what?”
“Look, just apologize, beg, lie, bribe. Hell, I’ll even beg for you but you have got to get Sasha back because you’re making me miserable,” Jared said.
“Now wait a minute,” Trey said heatedly, forgetting for a moment at he’d promised to enjoy himself. “I’m not miserable. My team is winning and I’m about to collect on our bet.”
“Trey.” The look Jared gave him only irritated him further.
“What?” he said tersely.
“Look at the scoreboard.”
With a sinking feeling in his gut, he turned and looked. The Hawks were up against the Bulls by twenty points. He looked farther to the left and saw that it was the fourth quarter with five minutes left in the game. He sat back in his seat, stunned as everything—the long hours at the clinic, weight loss and lack of sleep—dropped on him all at once. Trey narrowed his eyes and sat up. He wanted his life, his woman and his peace back. “Damn,” he said out loud. “J, you’re right.”
Jared waved a hand at the beer vendor stationed a few feet away.
“Two Coronas,” his friend ordered.
Once the ice-cold bottle was in his hand, Trey tapped the bottle against Jared’s. “I’m getting her back, man.”
“Thank god. Now can I enjoy the last few minutes of the game? And you might as well give me the hundred dollars now.”
Trey’s brow furrowed with confusion. “We only bet for fifty.”
“Jo’s going to give you fifty tomorrow.”
“He bet on the game, too?”
“Nah, he said he’d pay me fifty dollars if I could get you to make up with Sasha. Seems that you’ve been a cranky SOB at the clinic
since she broke up with you.”
Trey laughed until his eyes watered, and then pulled out his wallet and handed over the Benjamin.
When the doorbell rang, Sasha dropped her pen on the desk at Darwin’s first bark. “I’ll get it!” she yelled out, forgetting that Jackson was off skiing in Vail. She’d spent the past week hiding in the house and spending time going over grant requests, financial documents and research documents. She’d done everything that she could do not to think about Trey. But that didn’t keep him from slipping into her dreams at night and leaving her feeling depressed and lonely when she woke in the morning.
She walked through the house and looked through the peephole and saw nothing. She pulled open the door, looked down, and her mouth dropped as a little four-legged body trotted between her legs. Little Ralph had grown at least two inches since she’d last seen him at Trey’s parents’ house.
Sasha stepped outside and scanned the area looking for Trey. Her eyes narrowed and she mumbled, “Coward.”
Shutting the door, she turned to see Darwin and the puppy roughhousing in the middle of the floor. It took her a moment to see the note tied to his collar. She walked over and leaned down. Being careful not to startle Ralph, she held his wiggling squirming body for a second and released the small note. She unrolled it slowly and her heart caught at the childlike writing.
Homeless. Can I come in? If yes, open the door.
She ran to the door, put her hand on the knob and hesitated slightly before pulling back. His coming to her didn’t mean that he was ready to make the commitment she wanted. What if she was only setting herself up for more heartache? Sasha put her head against the door and closed her eyes. She’d spent the latter half of her adult life never feeling as though being alone meant that she was less complete. Years ago, she had her first taste of love and the sweetness of it had been so good until the bitter aftertaste of being alone again had knocked her to her knees. And here she was again on the verge of having her heart broken again.
“Come on, sweetheart. Open the door.”
“I can’t,” she replied.
“It’s cold out here.”
“Then go away.”
“Where would I go?”
“I don’t care. Just leave me alone.”
“You don’t mean that.”
She bit her tongue to quell the instinctive reply, because he was right. She didn’t mean it and she never would. Regardless of how everything turned out and the massive amounts of ice cream she consumed and tears she’d shed since her parents had left, there would always be a part of her that would care about Trey Blackfox.
“Sasha, I put the loft on the market yesterday and it sold this morning.”
She blinked twice and then pulled back the door. The frigid air curled her sock-covered toes. “What?”
Trey stepped through the doorway, and his heart pounded as Sasha turned around. The cloud of pain in her eyes made him want to drop to his knees. He drank in the sight of her standing there in a robe and fuzzy white socks. Ralph trotted over and Trey automatically bent down to pick up the puppy and settled him against his chest. “The real estate agent dropped by with the papers an hour ago.”
“I guess the real estate market is hotter than you thought.”
“No, my uncle decided to move to Atlanta and he thought that the loft would be a great place to start over.”
“Midlife crisis?”
Trey shook his head and smiled. “Uncle James has never married and he’s coming down here to find a wife who would be willing to put up with cigar smoking, and willing to give him four kids.”
Several heartbeats passed before she spoke. “So where are you moving?”
“I don’t know yet. But this time I want to build a house.”
His hand stilled as he rubbed Ralph’s head. “I love you, Sasha. I don’t think it. I know it. I’ve never loved a woman so much. Everything else in my life has gone to hell since you’ve been gone. I love your strength. I love you. I want to wake up with you sprawled across half the bed, see you grow big with our child, hear you scream at me when you have hot flashes and cry on my shoulders at weddings. Once a Blackfox makes a commitment, we keep it for life. You are my life, baby. Say you’ll be my wife.”
He said all the right words and her heart filled to the point where she imagined that it might burst. It wasn’t just the words. It was the way he looked at her. The look in his eyes was more powerful and compelling than any words he could have spoken. Because what was in those brown eyes that she loved was pure and honest. He looked at her as if she were his sustenance, and that he’d die without the taste of it.
Sasha took a step forward and cupped his face with her hands. “I love you,” she said in a soft, hoarse voice.
Trey smiled. “I love you, Darwin, Zaza, Ralph, Jackson, your mother, your father and your toes.”
She kissed him to still his mouth. “Jackson’s off skiing and we’ve got the house to ourselves. How about you leave Ralph with Darwin and show me how much you missed me?” she asked in a sultry voice.
“You sure? He’s not exactly housebroken.”
“Trey. Take me to bed.”
He needed no more instruction than that. He took Sasha in his arms and carried her up the stairs. With each step he thanked God for his family and friends, but most of all he was thankful for the lady in his arms.
ISBN: 978-1-4603-7069-8
A LOVE TO REMEMBER
Copyright © 2006 by Angela Weaver
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A Love to Remember Page 21
