by Joanne Fluke
“They will be. It’s Marge’s recipe, but she gave Herb the credit. She loved calling them Herb’s Herb Biscuits.” Lisa gave a little smile when she mentioned her mother-in-law’s name. “Marge is wearing the new beaded sweater Herb and I got her for her birthday. Does your mother have a new outfit?”
“Do bears... uh. . .growl in the woods?” Hannah sanitized the popular saying for her young partner. “I’m sure Mother will have a new outfit. She always does.”
“Welcome, ladies!” Hannah watched as her mother took her position at the head of the table. “I’m so glad you could come to our annual cookie exchange. Please find your place card and be seated. I understand my daughter, Hannah, will be making champagne cocktails for those of us who want to indulge and faux champagne cocktails for those who don’t. And while we’re waiting for our libations, let’s take a look at the appetizer and beverage recipes that Hannah has printed out for us. And then we’ll start in on this lovely baked brie.”
That was Hannah’s cue to carry out the champagne flutes rimmed in red sugar and play her part as the bartender. She picked up the tray, took a deep breath, and walked out to pour the bubbly.
Appetizers
CREAM CHEESE PUFFS
Hannah’s Note: If you’re not going to serve these right away, you can mix up the cream cheese part and refrigerate it until it’s time to spread it on the crackers.
8-ounce package cream cheese (the firm kind, not the
whipped)
2 Tablespoons ( cup) mayonnaise (We used Hellmann’s1)
3 Tablespoons minced green onion
OR 3 Tablespoons minced dried onion
OR 3 Tablespoons minced shallots
1 beaten egg
A box of salted crackers (We used Ritz Crackers and they were great!)
Unwrap the cream cheese and put it in a microwave-safe bowl. Nuke it on HIGH for 30 seconds, or until it begins to soften.
Mix in the mayonnaise and stir until the mixture is smooth.
Mix in the onion. (If you use green onion instead of shallots or dried onion, you can use up to one inch of the stem.)
Mix in the beaten egg.
Lay out the crackers on a broiler pan, salt side up. (We used a disposable broiler pan so we could trash it at Granny’s Attic and we wouldn’t have to carry it back to The Cookie Jar.)
Spread the cream cheese mixture on top of the crackers in a circle that reaches the edges of the crackers. If you don’t cover the crackers completely, they tend to burn under the broiler. Use about 2 teaspoons of cheese mixture per cracker and mound it slightly in the center.
Position the rack approximately three inches below the coil of the broiler and turn it on HIGH. Wait until the coil gets hot and then put in the cheese puffs. Broil the crackers (with the oven door open to the first latch so the broiler doesn’t kick on and off) until the cream cheese puffs up and is just starting to turn golden. This should take about 90 seconds if the rack is correctly positioned. Remove them from the oven immediately.
Let them cool for a minute or two, so your guests won’t burn their tongues. Then transfer the Cream Cheese Puffs to a platter and serve.
Yield: Approximately 2 dozen hot and yummy hors d’oeuvres.
Another Note from Hannah: I haven’t actually tried this, but I’m willing to bet a dozen of my best cookies that you could also add a quarter cup chopped smoked salmon to the cream cheese mixture.
*RAZZLE DAZZLE BAKED BRIE
Preheat oven to 350 degrees, rack in the middle position.
1 cup salted cashews, finely chopped2 (measure after
chopping)
2 large eggs
2 Tablespoons heavy cream (that’s cup)
1 small wheel of Brie with rind all over it (I used a 13-ounce
baby Brie that was approximately 5 inches in diameter.)
¼ to cup seedless raspberry jam (I used Knott’s Berry
Farm)
a basket of assorted crackers
small appetizer knives and spoons for serving
Chop the salted cashews in a food processor or by hand. The pieces should be no larger than coarse grains of sand.
Place the finely chopped cashews in a glass pie plate sprayed with Pam or another nonstick cooking spray. (A flat-bottomed, oven-safe dish with sides will also work just as long as it’s several inches larger than your wheel of Brie.)
Whisk the eggs and the heavy cream (that’s whipping cream) together in a small bowl until they’re thoroughly blended. Pour the resulting mixture into a second shallow dish or bowl (or pie plate).
Unwrap your wheel of Brie. Leave the rind on. You need the rind intact so that the cheese will hold its shape.
Dip the bottom of the Brie into the egg and cream mixture. Then pick it up by its sides and set it in the finely chopped cashews. Move it around a little so that the nuts will adhere to the egg and cream mixture.
Lift the Brie and take it back to the dish with the egg and cream mixture. Tip the cheese on its side and roll it in the mixture until the sides are coated with egg and cream.
Carry the Brie to the dish with the finely chopped nuts and roll it around in there so that the nuts adhere to the sides. You can press the nuts on with your hands to make them stick even better. When you’re through, position your Brie in the center of the dish with the chopped cashews, the bottom side down and the top side (without any nuts) up.
Heat the raspberry jam for 5 to 10 seconds in the microwave on HIGH until it’s easily spreadable. Then spoon it on top of the Brie, right in the middle. Use a rubber spatula or a frosting knife to spread it out to the edges.
Use a small spoon or your impeccably clean fingers to scoop up some chopped cashews and sprinkle them on top of the raspberry jam. Put on as many as you like as long as a bit of the red raspberry color shows through.
Leave the rest of the chopped cashews right there in the pie plate or ovenware dish.
Bake your Razzle Dazzle Baked Brie at 350 degrees for 15 to 20 minutes or until the cheese is beginning to melt inside.
Hannah’s Note: I’ve also made this with other double and triple cream cheeses and with other flavors of jam. Mother loves it with apricot jam and Andrea is crazy about Brie with peach jam.
Beverages
FAKE ORANGE JULIUS
3 cups orange juice (you’ll need 6 cups in all)
1 envelope dry Dream Whip (the kind that makes 2 cups)
1 package dry vanilla pudding mix (the kind that makes 2
cups)3
3 more cups orange juice
Pour the 3 cups of orange juice into a blender. Add the envelope of dry Dream Whip and the dry pudding mix. Blend for one minute on LOW and then for another minute on MEDIUM speed.
Pour the mixture in a 2-quart pitcher. Add the remaining 3 cups of orange juice and stir well.
Serve over ice.
Yield: Makes almost 2 quarts.
*RAZZLE DAZZLE CHAMPAGNE COCKTAIL
red decorator sugar
one lime, or one lemon
one small bottle of Chambord (raspberry liqueur)
one bottle of good champagne, chilled4
red maraschino cherries with stems (optional – to decorate)
champagne flutes
one shallow, flat-bottomed dish that’s an inch or two wider
than the top of the champagne flutes
Pour approximately a quarter-inch layer of red decorator sugar in the flat-bottomed dish.
Cut a lime or lemon into pieces and run the cut part around the rim of a champagne glass. The object is to wet the rim with the citrus juice.
Hannah’s 1st Note: Hank Olsen down at the Lake Eden Municipal Liquor Store told me that real bartenders use Rose’s Lime Juice to wet the rim of a glass before they sugar it for sweet drinks.
Turn the champagne glass upside down and dunk the rim into the dish of red sugar. Roll it around until sugar adheres all around the outside of the rim. Do this for all of the champagne glasses. This is a step that can be done i
n advance.
When you’re ready to assemble the cocktails, pour ¼ inch of Chambord in the bottom of your champagne flute. Then carefully fill the champagne glasses with champagne. You’ll have to pour slowly because champagne can foam up very quickly. (There’s a reason some people call it “bubbly” instead of “champagne”.)
There’s no need to stir (and you don’t want to break down those pretty bubbles anyway) because this drink will mix itself.
Top off your creation with a maraschino cherry if you wish. A fresh, plump raspberry speared with a little cocktail pick would also be nice if raspberries are in season.
Hannah’s 2nd Note: To make a non-alcoholic version of this drink, follow the directions for Razzle Dazzle Faux Champagne Cocktail.
*RAZZLE DAZZLE FAUX CHAMPAGNE COCKTAIL
red decorator sugar
one lime, or one lemon
one large bottle of sparkling apple-raspberry juice, chilled5
red maraschino cherries with stems (optional – to decorate)
champagne flutes
one shallow, flat-bottomed dish that’s an inch or two wider
than the top of the champagne flutes
Pour approximately a quarter-inch layer of red decorator sugar in the flat-bottomed dish.
Cut a lime or lemon into pieces and run the cut part around the rim of a champagne glass. The object is to wet the rim with the citrus juice so that the sugar will stick to the rim.
Hannah’s 1st Note: You could also use Rose’s Lime Juice to wet the rim of the glass. Just pour it on a paper towel and wipe the rim.
Turn the champagne glass upside down and dunk the rim into the dish of red sugar. Roll it around until sugar adheres all around the outside of the rim. Do this for all of the champagne glasses. This is a step that can be done in advance.
When you’re ready to assemble the faux cocktails, carefully fill the champagne glasses with sparkling apple-raspberry juice. You’ll have to pour slowly so that it won’t foam up and melt the red sugar you’ve put around the rims.
Top off your creation with a maraschino cherry if you wish. A fresh plump raspberry speared with a little cocktail pick would also be nice if raspberries are in season.
Hannah’s 2nd Note: Kids just love these. Andrea and I both think it’s because they’re served in a “grownup” champagne glass.
“This cocktail is wonderful!” Carrie declared, turning to Hannah. “Could I please have another?”
“Better be careful, Carrie,” Delores smiled to show she was teasing her best friend. “You know what happened to Winnie Henderson the night she had too much dandelion wine, don’t you?”
Carrie looked puzzled. “But Winnie doesn’t drink. I offered her a glass of wine when we had lunch at the Lake Eden Inn last week and she told me that.”
“She doesn’t drink... now,” Delores gave a little chuckle. “Actually, she didn’t drink then. And that was part of the problem. Poor Winnie was just following Doc’s orders.”
“Doc Knight told Winnie to drink?” It was obvious that Carrie was still confused.
“Not exactly, but Winnie came to see him because she was having trouble sleeping.”
“That was over twenty years ago,” Grandma Knudson explained, “when Winnie was married to that awful third husband of hers, the one who sold aluminum siding and was gone for weeks at a time.”
“Right,” Delores took up the story again. “Winnie told Doc that she just couldn’t fall asleep. And if she did, she startled awake after only a couple of minutes. Doc could see that she was at her wit’s end and he suggested a mild form of sleeping pill. But Winnie didn’t want that, so Doc told her to drink a jigger of brandy right before bedtime and that would do the trick.”
“That would work,” Marge Beeseman agreed. “Jack sleeps better if he has a little blackberry brandy before bedtime.”
There were several nods around the table and then Delores went on. “Well, Winnie was a complete nondrinker. She had no idea how big a jigger was. But her second husband used to drink Jack Daniel’s in a water glass so she figured that was probably what Doc meant.”
“Oh, good heavens!” Florence, who was still wearing her Red Owl Grocery nametag gave a little groan. “Poor Winnie must have been as drunk as a skunk.”
“Oh, she was. A few minutes after she drank it, her head started to spin and she decided that she needed some air. She made it all the way down her driveway and almost out to the country road. But then she decided it was time to take a little nap. and she stretched out right there at the foot of her driveway.”
“Poor Winnie!” Ellie Kuehne gave a little shiver. She’d taken the afternoon off from her managerial duties at Bertanelli’s Pizza, and she looked happy to have some free time. “Did she have a terrible hangover?”
“Yes, but she was already in the hospital. But we’re getting ahead of ourselves. There Winnie is, stretched out on her gravel driveway, so drunk she’s not moving a muscle, and a car comes along. The driver’s a lady who’s visiting someone down the road. She gets out to see what’s wrong and she can’t rouse Winnie, so she rushes back home and calls for an ambulance.”
“So Doc sent the paramedics out to get Winnie?” Carrie guessed.
“Not exactly. Doc didn’t have his own ambulance back then. He contracted with Digger to use the hearse as an ambulance. It worked just fine. Digger took down the Gibson Funeral Home signs, removed the velvet curtains on the windows in the back, and put a gurney in the place where the casket would be. He even had a light like the deputies have on their squad cars that attached to the roof of the hearse with a suction cup.”
“So Digger went out to pick Winnie up?” Carrie leaned forward slightly, waiting for the answer to her question.
“Actually... Digger wasn’t home, but he’d arranged with Cyril Murphy to take any ambulance calls that came in. Brigit answered the phone and rather than bother Cyril, who was working late at the garage, she called. . .”
“Me,” Alice Vogel interrupted, and Hannah, who was watching from the pass-through window in the community center kitchen, noticed that Alice was blushing with embarrassment. “I was living back at home after my divorce, and I told Brigit I’d be right over to help her.”
“So Brigit and Alice went out in Digger’s ambulance,” Delores continued. “Except they never even thought to take down the Gibson Funeral Home signs and the curtains.”
“We put the gurney in, though.” Alice volunteered.
“That’s right. Brigit drove and Alice rode next to her in the passenger seat.”
Alice nodded. “The lady who called said she thought that Winnie was dead, so we didn’t hurry that much. Brigit seemed okay about going to pick up a. . . a deceased person, but I wasn’t exactly comfortable.”
“When they got there, Winnie was still passed out cold on her driveway. She’s not very big, so Brigit and Alice didn’t have any trouble loading her on the gurney and lifting it into the back of the ambulance.” Delores paused and gave a little smile. “Or perhaps I should say... hearse.”
“We thought the lady was right and Winnie was dead,” Alice said, sounding a bit defensive. “I was okay when we loaded her on the gurney, but after we got in the front again and started driving out to the hospital morgue, I started thinking about how there was a dead person riding in back of me. I kept telling myself that it was the living who could hurt you, not the dead, but I was still really jumpy. I made sure that glass panel between the front of the hearse and the back was shut tight, and that made me feel a little better. And then I asked Brigit to turn on the radio to distract me. Brigit must have been nervous too, because she found a country western station and turned it up really loud. That helped a lot until I heard a screech from the back of the hearse.”
There were several gasps from the ladies, even though most of them had heard this story before.
“Winnie came to,” Carrie breathed, shivering slightly.
Delores gave a little nod. “That’s right. Winnie regai
ned consciousness and the first thing she saw was the funeral home sign in the hearse window. And the next thing she saw was that the curtains were still up. Winnie’s a bright woman. She said, Hello? Is anybody there? but the glass panel was closed and the radio was so loud that Brigit and Alice didn’t hear her. Winnie put two and two together, but unfortunately, she came up with the wrong answer. She thought she must be dead, and it scared her so much she screamed.”
“So that’s why Winnie doesn’t drink,” Carrie concluded.
“That’s right. And that’s why Doc never prescribes a jigger of brandy for insomnia. Now he says, “an ounce,” or “half an inch in the bottom of a water glass.”
“I never heard that one before,” Lisa said to Hannah.
“Maybe your folks thought you were too young. Let’s dish up the soup, Lisa. I think they’re almost ready.”
Lisa headed for the slow cooker sitting on the counter. “Okay. Maybe they’ll tell more stories. This is really fun!”
Soups
TRUDI’S SHRIMP BISQUE
Hannah’s 1st Note: You can also make this bisque with crabmeat, or with a combination of shrimp and crab.
10 and ¾ oz. can condensed tomato soup (I used Camp-
bell’s)
