by L. J. Red
“I still don’t know what to say to her,” Jacob admitted. “I still have so much to explain about the claiming and the bond, but after what happened in the courtroom I can feel her withdrawing from the world and I don’t know how to pull her out of her shell.”
Rune shook his head. “It is not a matter of pulling her out,” he said. “You just need to be there for her. Don’t push.” He looked down at his hands. “I regret pushing Brigit. I almost pushed her away from me for good.” He looked up and his eyes were hollow with imagined loss. “It would have broken me had Brigit rejected me. I almost destroyed my only chance at happiness. I don’t want that to happen to you. Just be there for her,” he said again. “Show Sparrow, through your presence, that you will stand by her, no matter what happens. Don’t force her to open up to you. Give her time and she will see how lucky she is. You deserve happiness, Jacob. You’re a good man, a good vampire, and Sparrow is no fool. She will see that.”
Jacob sighed. He knew Rune was right and that pushing Sparrow to open up wouldn’t help at all. Not after everything she’d been through. She needed to come to him in her own time, and yet he still felt that strange sense of time running out, as if there were a great threat on the horizon that was poised to destroy their moment of peace. “I want to claim her,” he said to Rune, finally admitting his feelings. “I want the bond to be stable and forever.”
Rune nodded. “I understand, I do, but claiming, particularly to one who has recently been a human, is an alien concept. They know so little about vampire natures and, so far, her experience of vampires has been so negative she may be afraid of claiming, and understandably so. Give her time to see that it can be something beautiful and precious, not just pain and loss.”
Jacob nodded. “Thank you,” he said. “Now finish that and go back to the infirmary. Promise me,” he insisted.
Rune grinned. “Cross my heart,” he said.
Jacob picked up Sparrow’s plate and left the dining room. He’d only gone a couple of paces down the hall when he suddenly felt what he had been dreading—a pulse of fear and pain down the bond. The plate slipped from his hands, smashing against the floor, food flying everywhere as he sprinted down the hallway back to his rooms, toward Sparrow.
Chapter 28
Sparrow was tugged up out of her sleep by a strange, painful presence. She blinked and stared around her in confusion. It took her a second to recognize Jacob’s room and remember the events of the past day.
They had come back here after the courthouse. The courthouse. Oh, God. All those dead. Grief yawned at her feet, making her feel off-balance. She burrowed under the covers, not wanting to face the new night, wanting to hide away and pretend none of it had ever happened, but she couldn’t; it was all too real. They were never coming back. Roman had turned the vampires against the humans, against themselves, and it was only a matter of time before he figured out how to do that to Sparrow as well.
She forced herself up, her limbs feeling leaden, and kicked off the covers, searching for her clothes. She’d stripped off everything after the courtroom, ash and dust coating every layer of her clothes to her skin. Even her necklace was sitting by the sink in need of proper cleaning.
She found her jeans, but her shirt was nowhere to be found and she pushed open one of Jacob’s wardrobes and grabbed one of his shirts, wrapping it around her and breathing deeply of his heavy scent. She wished he were here. Where was he? She could sense him faintly on the bond, but before she reached out to him there was a sudden ripple again—the same tug that had brought her out of her sleep—and she felt Roman’s presence dangerously close. She spun around, but there was no one there. Fear trickled down her spine. She needed to get out of here. This was her chance to escape. Jacob wasn’t here. This was her chance to protect the people she loved.
She slipped on her shoes and walked quickly over to the door, tugging it open and then stopping short in surprise. Dana was standing in the doorway, looking just as surprised as Sparrow, her hand raised to knock. A smile spread over her face and she dropped her hand. “Sparrow,” she said. “I’m so glad you’re awake. I was coming to check on you.”
Sparrow opened her mouth to reply, but before she could, Roman was suddenly there, filling up her veins with ice, her body and soul with his will. All of his intent focused on her. His power hitting her like a sledgehammer. There was nothing she could do to stop him. His presence rose up within her like a dark black wave, crashing down upon her and drowning her will.
Her fangs lengthened in her mouth, her face contorting, stretching into a rictus of pain, and hazily she felt her vision fade out white and she knew her eyes were blanking.
All she felt was hate, pure, undiluted hatred, strong and thick and cloying, tangling her limbs until she was barely able to move, just a puppet for Roman’s will. She couldn’t stop Roman from reading the truth from her mind. She knew about soulmates and now, so did Roman. She understood that Dana, standing in front of her, was the key to Lucian’s heart. She felt Roman’s realization shudder through her body. He knew now that it was the soulmate bond that had given Sparrow the strength to fight him off.
Roman’s attention focused to a point. Here was his chance to get back at Lucian, to destroy the person Lucian loved more than anything. To break him. Roman’s hatred punched through Sparrow’s body and she felt her muscles tense against her will, readying herself to strike Dana down.
She lunged forward, her fangs going to Dana’s throat, her sharp claws reaching. Instead of fighting her off, Dana, who still saw her as a friend, hesitated. The hesitation would cost her her life.
Sparrow slammed into her, her fangs grazing Dana’s neck, ready to bite down and rip out her throat. She could almost see the blood spray soaking the walls, the floor. She railed against the prison of her body, trying desperately to break free of Roman’s grip, but he was the leader of her Bloodline. All the vampiric blood that ran through her veins came from him. All her vampire power and all that strength were turned against her. There was nothing she could do. Her fangs ached and she bit down… on air.
Jacob was suddenly there, his presence blooming against her mind, his hands hard on her body. And he tugged her back at the last moment, just that tiny distance, just enough that she missed Dana’s neck.
Dana jumped clear and Sparrow was able to get the tiniest bit of control over her limbs. Roman wanted her to lunge after Dana but Sparrow shoved herself backward instead, pushing into Jacob’s embrace, reaching desperately for him. She gripped him with her clawed hands so tight that blood ran down her knuckles.
She wasn’t letting go. His presence was burning away Roman’s icy control, burning and pushing it back. It hurt, every second hurt. She felt like she was held between the two of them and her soul was the rope they were both tugging on. It splintered and stretched and pain tore through her body, but she ignored it. She needed to get her mind back from Roman. She didn’t want to hurt anyone.
Roman’s grip on her slipped away for a second and Sparrow’s vision cleared. She saw Dana pressed against the far wall, her eyes wide and blood trickling down her neck. Oh God, Sparrow thought. What had she done? She slumped in Jacob’s grip. She was unsafe; she was a danger to the rest of them. Everything she had feared was true. Roman was going to use her to destroy the Shadows. She could still feel his grip on her mind, on her throat. She couldn’t warn them, couldn’t tell them anything. She read the shock and horror in Dana’s expression. Dana was appalled at what Sparrow had done. She needed to try to explain, she needed to try to warn them. She opened her mouth to speak and Roman’s presence suddenly rose up inside her and knocked her out, cold black unconsciousness washing through her mind.
Chapter 29
“This time it’s gone too far.” Lucian’s voice broke Sparrow’s sleep and she pushed up to wakefulness. The infirmary ceiling resolved in front of her eyes. The light was off but she could see from the light filtering in from the hallway. She was turned with her back to the door. She heard a fo
otstep behind her, then Jacob’s voice replying.
“I agree. It’s different this time. It has definitely gone too far.”
A coldness lodged in her heart. It was her. They were talking about her, what she had done to Dana.
“Is Dana all right?” Jacob asked.
“Surface wounds only,” Lucian replied, “but that’s not the point. An attack like this—”
“No, I agree,” Jacob said. “It could have been so much worse. She could have been destroyed.”
“Yes,” Lucian said, and it sounded like they were both looking at her, but that couldn’t be right. They had to be talking about Dana and what Sparrow had almost done to her. “I can’t let a threat like this continue,” Lucian said. “Something must be done.”
Oh God, Sparrow thought, curling in on herself instinctively. What were they going to do to her?
“We will spread out into the city,” Lucian said. “Roman must be found, but I can trust you to take care—”
“Yes,” Jacob said, “you can trust me.”
Take care? Take care of her? Misery put hooks in Sparrow’s limbs, dragging her down. This was it, she thought. This was the end of her time here at the Sanctuary. They were going to put her down just like the mad vampires that had attacked the courthouse. She couldn’t even blame them. She was a threat to everyone. Her presence here was a danger to them all.
Lucian was right. He was behaving as the leader of the Shadows should. He was placing the safety of the other vampires and humans of the Sanctuary first. Just like a Shadow ought to. It was the right thing to do. She knew it. She had to be sacrificed to keep the others safe.
But she didn’t want it to be Jacob. She didn’t understand why Lucian would put the task on him. Why would he make one soulmate kill another? Unless he didn’t know?
Oh God, Sparrow thought, as the truth of that rained down on her. Jacob was her soulmate, he truly was. She could feel his presence faintly at the back of her mind and she quickly drew a veil up around it, not wanting him to know she was awake, so that his presence was muffled and faint, barely there.
They hadn’t had a chance to claim the bond. No chance to truly explore the connection between their souls. Their time together had been so short. Sparrow pressed her eyes closed against the hot tears that threatened to escape. She wouldn’t do that to Jacob, no matter what Lucian wanted. She wouldn’t make him be the one to get rid of her. It wasn’t right. She would find a way to do it herself. Yes, that was it. She would get away from the Sanctuary, put as much distance between her and the other vampires as possible so that Roman couldn’t use her against them, and then, before he could get his claws into her once more, she would kill herself.
“Come.” Lucian’s voice echoed through the room. “There are arrangements to be made.” A second later, Sparrow heard the door slam shut.
Her eyes snapped open. They thought she was still asleep. They thought she was still out from the battle over her soul, but she was awake and this was her chance to escape.
Moving silently, she slipped out of the bed. She was still wearing Jacob’s shirt, the rising scent of him surrounding her, giving her strength. She was doing the right thing.
Sparrow crept to the door and opened it a crack. The hallway was empty, and quickly, quietly, she slipped through and jogged down the hall toward the exit. She pulled up short, her hand going to her neck. Her necklace. Where was it? She had taken it off because it had been coated in grime from the courtroom. A shudder went through her at that memory and she shied away from it.
She hadn’t cleaned it yet. It must still be lying by the sink in Jacob’s room. She needed it. She couldn’t leave without it. She knew she should be sprinting for the exit but she couldn’t do it. She couldn’t leave without that last memory of who she had been as a human, the only thing she had to remind her of her mother. Resolutely, she turned toward the stairs that led up to the Shadows’ rooms at the back of the building. She would find it and then she would leave for good.
Chapter 30
Jacob stood at the window overlooking the main entrance to the Sanctuary as the rest of the shadows slipped out into the night in search of Roman. His conversation with Lucian was fresh in his mind. He had told Lucian the truth, he had had enough. The hunters had gone too far. Sparrow had been driven to the brink of destruction. He had almost lost her. He had felt the soulmate bond unraveling under his grip, and the moment she had passed out in his arms he had carried her directly to the infirmary, sending out a call through the bloodline bond for Lucian as he did so.
He had explained to Lucian what had happened over Sparrow’s sleeping body. They had retreated into the hallway so as not to wake her. Jacob had been worried Lucian would blame Sparrow for what had happened, but he should have trusted in his leader. Lucian knew exactly who was to blame for the evil that had overcome Sparrow’s body. Whatever the HUNT had done to her, it had gone too far. He had almost lost Sparrow and Jacob would never allow that to happen.
His brothers would find the answers they needed. He wanted to be out there in the night, chasing down every last shred of evidence on what the hunters might have done to her, just like they were, but he knew it was more important to stay here. He needed to be here when Sparrow woke up. She would blame herself; he knew she would. He needed to be here to reassure her that no one blamed her for what happened. Even Dana had made a point of coming down to the infirmary with him straight after the attack. She had almost forgotten the wounds on her neck until Lucian had arrived, picked her up bodily, and pinned her to the bed until Dr. Patil had seen to her.
Sparrow had a place here, and Jacob was going to make sure she knew that. No matter what was happening to her body, it was out of her control. She belonged with the Shadows. She belonged with him.
A strange urge ran through him, a kind of fluttering as if the bond itself was trying to tell him something. Jacob turned around, stepping back from the window. He glanced about, but no one was here. All of his brothers were gone, save Rune, who was still recovering from his injury in the infirmary not far from Sparrow’s sleeping body.
A strange feeling slid through the bond. Sparrow. He felt an overwhelming urge to see her. He wanted to have her by his side, he needed his eyes on her, be ready for when she woke.
He began walking down to the infirmary, but the bond pulled, stretching him in a different direction. He stopped on the stairway and looked back at the upper floors. Why did he feel like Sparrow was there? Why did he feel pulled in a different direction? She was downstairs in the infirmary… Wasn’t she? Worry dogged his steps as he turned away from the infirmary and began to head in the direction the bond was calling him, toward his room.
Walking faster and faster, pushed with a sense of urgency, a sense that he might already be too late, he broke out into a run and then flat-out sprinting through the corridors. The shadows clustered about him, lending him speed as he rushed closer and closer, the bond pulling him forward. He was surer than ever that Sparrow lay ahead of him, not behind.
He rounded the corner to his room just as the door was opening, and Sparrow came out. Jacob pulled up short and Sparrow’s eyes went wide when she saw him. “You’re not leaving,” he growled, and he took a step forward, caging her against the door, his hands on either side. “What were you thinking?” he snarled down at her.
Fire sparked in Sparrow’s eyes. “I heard you,” Sparrow said, the words exploding out of her. “In the infirmary, you and Lucian were talking about me. About the threat I pose. That the attack was too much. I went too far. I know it.” Horror ran through Jacob’s body. She thought they had been talking about her?
“No,” he said, but she wasn’t listening.
Sparrow choked on a sob. “I don’t want you to have to kill me like the others.”
Jacob growled wordlessly, his eyes flashing, and he pressed close to Sparrow. She trembled underneath him and he realized she was afraid of him. He never wanted to feel her fear. It was like nails scraping down a cha
lkboard, leaving him feeling raw.
“No, Sparrow,” he whispered. “We weren’t talking about you. Never you. It wasn’t your fault. None of it was your fault.” He reached for her chin, gently turning her face up toward his. “Sparrow,” he said, “I love you. You are my soulmate and I will never harm you. What’s happening to you, it’s out of your control, but what the hunters did—”
Sparrow’s expression flickered for a moment and she tugged, trying to turn her face away. But Jacob wouldn’t let her. He needed to say this and she needed to hear it.
“Sparrow, from the first moment I saw you in the factory I knew you were my soulmate. My heart started to beat, my heart that had been silent for centuries, ever since I was turned into a vampire. You are everything I could have hoped for and the sight of you stirred my blood and brought me back to life. I have never known love like this,” he said, his thumb brushing over her chin and sliding along her bottom lip. “God, Sparrow,” he said, rough and low. “What you do to me.” He could feel himself hardening just at the feel of her under his hand. “I can’t control myself around you. I have always been able to control my emotions with an icy calm, but ever I since met you it’s like I’ve been burning. The feelings you bring out in me are stronger than anything I’ve ever known.” His hand shook. “I can’t live without you. The thought that you might be harmed tears me up inside. I hate that I can’t stand between this threat and you. I want to protect you because you are mine. Whether we claim the bond or not, you are mine and I will never give you up.” He leaned in closer toward her. “We will find a way to fight this new threat together.” He reached out with his other hand and tangled his fingers with hers. “Stay, Sparrow. I need you to stay with me. You are all I need, and if you leave I will have nothing. Just speak to me, tell me what’s wrong, tell me what it is you are so afraid of. Let me help you.”
