“True, you’ve got a good point. My mother bought me a bike without training wheels, against my pops protest, and I busted my ass.”
“Jamal,” said Sasha as she giggled. “If you didn’t know how to ride, why did you ask for a bike without training wheels?”
“In my hood it didn’t matter if you could ride or not. You had to front like you could or all the boys would crack jokes on you for years!”
“Male egos! Come on, let’s get in line.”
Five minutes later we were standing in a long line of people waiting to purchase their merchandise or half the aisle for some people. For some reason, I started to feel paranoid. With all the cheating I was doing, I should have never come to the mall with her. There were far too many people here. Life can be going good, things running smooth, and all it takes is one fuck up to ruin everything.
My dad always told me Troy wasn’t built in a day but was stolen in a single evening. To make matters worse, we were standing in a line in the most popular department store in the entire mall. The fear of getting caught had me sweating something awful.
“You okay?” said Sasha as she feels the tension radiating off my body.
“Yeah, it’s just a little...” My words are loudly interrupted.
“Jamal?” said Maria as she walks by.
“Hey, Maria what’s going on?” I was caught. I forgot to mention that Maria had been calling me all morning and I conveniently silenced my phone so I could shop, uninterrupted, with Sasha.
“Did you get my messages? I’ve been calling your ass all morning so we could go shopping!”
Before I can respond, Sasha shows me a side of her I never knew she had, “Excuse me, what’s your name?”
“Maria. Why you want to know? Jamal, tell this chick who I am!”
“He ain’t got to say shit because I’m his woman!”
“Woman?”
“That’s right and where do you know my man from?”
Maria just looks at me in disbelief and said, “I’m sorry, what’s your name?”
“Sasha…”
“Well, Sasha… this piece of shit told me that he didn’t have a girl.” Sasha’s pretty brown eyes turned as red as the devil when she turned to look at me.
“Well, he’s right… He doesn’t have a girl anymore! He’s free so you could have him.” Sasha dropped the shoes and began rushing, in a haste of embarrassment, toward the escalator. I did what any man would do to save face… I said, with a straight face, “Sasha baby she’s lying.”
“Do you think I’m stupid?”
“No, baby.”
“Don’t call me baby! Look me in the eyes and tell me you never slept with that woman,” she yells with tears in her eyes.
“You’re right, I did. But that was a long time ago!”
I didn’t know Maria had been following me closely. After hearing my lie, she slapped me in the face.
“Puta, maricon, you were at my house a few days ago screaming my name bitch! Fuck you asshole! You’re going to get yours Jamal,” she yells as she storms out of sight. Embarrassed, I had to yell something to redeem my manhood.
“I got mines already, bitch!”
“How could you do this to me,” Sasha asked. The tears began to flow from her eyes.
“I thought we had something special!” I can’t look her in the face or say anything. Her tears continue to flow as the guilt begins to eat me alive. Maybe I should have thought about the consequences before I broke her heart. “I thought you said you were different.”
“I am Sasha, I’m sorry. I don’t know why I did it.”
“You’re right about one thing, you are sorry. Goodbye Jamal,” she said as she turned to walk away. Deep down inside, I wanted to run after her, get down on my knees, and plead with her to forgive me. The truth is I didn’t deserve her. Sometimes people can have that perfect blessing. You know where all you have to do is enjoy the ride. I fucked up everything. I felt like shit. I was a piece of shit.
On Christmas morning when most people were indoors with family unwrapping gifts, smiling, and enjoying each other’s company. For me there was nobody to share it with. I was actually on my way, walking towards Sasha’s house with gifts. For the kids there were some toys, Barbie dolls and remote control cars, but for Sasha, I brought flowers hoping to mend her broken heart.
I had called and left about 100 apologizes with no response. Every footstep toward her building made me feel worse. I almost turned around and went home at least twice. For a few seconds I stood there, dripping water from my boots on her welcome mat. I finally made up my mind and knocked on the door.
“Who is it,” she answered. I take a quick breath and replied, “It’s me…Jamal.”
To my surprise, she cracked the door. I was expecting a ‘go away’ or no answer at all.
“Yes…what do you want?” she said as coldly as she could.
“I just wanted to bring these gifts for your kids.”
Sasha was unmoved as her eyes burn straight through me. “Who are you giving flowers to?”
“They… They’re for you.” Once again to my surprise, she takes the gifts but looks at me and said, “The flowers are lovely, but you can keep them.”
“That’s cool. Sasha I’m really sorry. I don’t know what got into my head.”
“I’m a big girl. I’ll be fine.”
“Tell your kids I said hi.”
“Okay, bye Jamal.” As the door slammed in my face, my emotions get the best of me. Tears slowly started to fall from my eyes. I had lost someone who truly loved me. More than that, I hurt her.
Later that evening, I awoke to the sound of my phone ringing.
“What’s the deal?”
“Hey…Aaron what’s going on man?”
“What are you doing right now?”
“Nothing really, why what’s up?”
“Cool, come on over and bring your girl with you.”
“Give me about one hour or so and I’ll be there.”
“See you then.” I didn’t really need that much time but I wanted to drive the long way and get myself together.
I arrived at Aaron and Crystal’s house… Alone. The last time I came here alone was after Sheila had left me, but this time it was because of my own shady deeds. Before I could knock on my boy’s door, he opened it and quickly closes it behind him.
“Where’s Sasha?”
“She’s at home with the kids.”
“You two good?”
“Why you ask?”
“Because my wife and I called her earlier to see how you guys were enjoying Christmas morning and they were politicking for almost two hours.”
“Word!”
“Yeah and my wife got off the phone silent and hasn’t said much since.”
“Damn.”
“What did you do homey?”
“Aaron… You wouldn’t believe me if I told you. I messed around behind her back and she found out.”
“I’m shocked! You were never like that.”
“I know.”
“What happened? You guys looked happy.”
“I didn’t feel for her the way she felt for me.”
“You could have fooled me,” Aaron holds his head down and walks inside. “Come on in out of the cold.”
I walked in and I am greeted by their two kids that are happy about their Christmas gifts.
“Hey kids.”
“Hi Uncle Jamal,” they yell as they run over and give me a big hug. Seeing their two sons, reminded me of Sasha’s children. Crystal walked into the room and just shook her head. “I’m mad at you Jamal,” she said. “Kids go and watch television in your room.”
“Okay mommy, see you later uncle Jamal.”
I tried to change the subject. “I miss those kids boy, man they’re getting big too, where were they on thanksgiving though?”
Aaron replied, “Oh, they went down south with their uncle to see their cousins for thanksgiving. Every year we switch up.”
Crystal walked over to me, softly punched me in the shoulder, and said, “How could you be so stupid Jamal?”
“I don’t really know, I don’t really know. You see guys, I liked her a lot but I didn’t love her like she loved me.”
Crystal interrupts, “honesty was your best quality, and you should have just told her the truth about your feelings. You knew she had two kids.” I simply nodded my head and contemplated as the doorbell rung.
“Who is that,” said Aaron as he walks toward the door. Once the door is open Eli walked in elated. “What’s up man?”
“Nothing really man, just chilling.”
“E, I called you man! What happened to your phone?”
“I didn’t have any messages today, did you leave one?”
“Not really! No I didn’t.”
“Next time leave a message.”
“No doubt.”
Crystal decided to change the topic probably sensing the melancholy I was feeling.
“So which girls house are you coming from, Eli?”
“Actually, I know in the past a brother was tripping but I only have one girl and that’s my baby Yvette.” The room is in complete shock. None of us could believe what we were hearing.
“I’m dead serious, she’s my numero uno.”
In a way I felt somewhat envious, yet disappointed because this was the same man that was going on and on about not trusting women.
“What about your creed of not trusting any women E?” I had to see what had changed my friend into the model companion.
“Actually, when you spend time with someone, and learn what they’re all about guys, you feel safe and free. I’m not too far from you guys now Aaron and Crystal.”
I didn’t know if the last comment was a joke but it had me going crazy.
“On that note, I’ll see you guys later.”
“Where are you going? You just got here,” said Aaron.
“I think I’m going to look up some tickets to go see my mother after New Year’s…so I’ll catch up with you guys.”
I was out the door. What the hell was happening to my life? In my senseless thinking I drove to Monica’s building not calling to see if her husband is home…I just needed someone to talk to. As I walked in the building the front desk man alerts me to hold on while he called up. I complied though I was caught off guard because normally I just hopped in the elevator and went up to the Penthouse. The doorman knew this so I needed to know what had changed.
“What gives man, you never stopped me before.”
“I know sir,” he said with a smile on his face. “Sir, she has a surprise for you that I don’t want to ruin, so I’ve been instructed to ask you to wait here.”
“Fine, whatever.”
I waited a few minutes then the elevator comes down. When the door opened, it was full of white people but no Monica, a sister. A young white man in his late twenties or early thirties smiled at me and walked toward me.
“Are you Mr. Styles?”
“Yeah.”
“Jamal, the artist?”
“Yeah and who are you all up in my business?”
“A fan and a friend!”
“Excuse me? I’m sorry I didn’t get your name?”
“I’m Scott”
“Well Scott! Where the fuck do you know me from because you’re getting all up in my mother fucking face.”
“Where are my manners, I know your work because your work has quite a fan base downtown and you’re my friend because you just saved me a lot of money.”
“What? This ain’t a damn Geico commercial so you better step…”
Scott jabbed me two times in my face and dropped me with a punch to my gut. I gasped for air as I went down to my knees.
“That’s for screwing my wife behind my back.” I tried to grab him but he sidestepped me and kicked me right in face. Black men everywhere would have felt disgraced because he was whooping my ass.
“Oh yeah, I should thank you because I know now that my wife is nothing but a two timing whore.”
“Fuck you.”
“I’m calling the police,” yelled the front desk man.
Monica came downstairs screaming for us to stop fighting but neither of us heard her as we continued to exchange blows. For every blow I landed, he landed two, three, or a kick. I lost my temper, I threw a wide haymaker. He ducked and roundhouse kicked me completely over the front desk counter top. My mind went completely blank.
When I awoke, the police were there and had Monica’s husband in hand cuffs. The police walked over to me, I was still dazed, and asked me in the sternest voice, “Sir is it true he assaulted you first?”
“Yes officer, he walked up to me and started swinging.”
“So you didn’t provoke him?”
“No sir.”
“So why did he hit you? You must have done something.”
“What…”
“Do you live here?”
“No.”
“I think you’re leaving out something.”
The police were trying to find any reason to let him go and probably apprehend me instead. “Do you see my damn face? The man knocked me out.”
The officer looks at me and grins, “Luckily for you we received a call earlier about domestic abuse from this man.”
“What?”
“Apparently he slapped the taste out of his wife and busted her lip as well. Take him away,” said the officer as they push Scott into a squad car.
“It’s not over! I’m a very influential man,” he said with a slight grin. Monica was in the ambulance on her way to the hospital. Monica forgot to mention her husband was a skilled martial artist or white. What a night full of surprises. I couldn’t believe I was fucking up people’s lives in a single week. Maria, Sasha, and Monica suffered because of my behavior. All I could do was blame myself.
The next day I found myself at the bar sipping on a Heineken all by my lonesome. Eli was usually here on Saturdays but I was not sure if he was going to make it. A young Spanish guy sat next to me and began to ask questions.
“Are you Jamal?” I laugh to myself thinking ‘here we go again,’ but this time I wasn’t going to let anybody get the best of me.
“Actually…people call me Big Jay,” I said before I sucker punched him and hit him over the head with my beer bottle.
“Yeah! What? My name is Jamal.” I began stomping the hell out of him before he could get up. Bystanders break up the altercation and the young man runs out of the bar. I yelled “All day son, all day.”
People shook their heads and I returned to my spot at the bar, continuing to wait for Eli. Three hours had passed and by this time my equilibrium was completely thrown off. Was I drunk? Pissy drunk! I started laughing for reason I can’t quite remember and made my way towards the door. As soon as I walk out of the door, three big men wearing black masks and black gloves started beating the shit out of me. Thank goodness, I was so bent that I couldn’t feel most of the blows. All of a sudden like a prayer from God, I heard gunshots and the guys ran away. It was Johnny the bartender and his .45 that saved me.
As the soberness began to return to my body, the pain settled in and almost crippled me. I realized that I was in the hospital’s E.R.
“Aw man.”
“You okay man?” said Eli.
“I guess so…”
“What’s the deal with the bar fight my man?”
“I’ll tell you later…right now my head hurts like hell.” As Eli and I talked, Imani passed by with an empty stretcher and realized it was me.
“Oh my goodness, Jamal what happened to you,” she said with tears in her eyes.
“It’s cool, just got into a drunken bar fight that’s all.”
“Is there anything I could do for you?”
“No, but if I…I mean if you could find out what’s the hold up, I’d be grateful.”
“Say no more.”
Imani left our section of the Emergency room to investigate what was tak
ing so long for the doctor to show his face. When she comes back and Eli tapped me to see if I was sleep.
“I’m awake E... good looking.”
“It’s hard to tell with both your eyes swollen up like that.”
What Lies Between The Sheets Page 10
