Elaina’s hips rocked, hands braced on my shoulders, nails digging into my skin. She gasped as she pushed herself further down, feeling me hit her limit. Her moment was soon, and I couldn’t take my eyes off my beautiful wife.
I pushed her tank top above her breasts and swiped my thumbs across her darkened nipples. The little extra cushion she had along her belly made my cock harden further. The changes in her body since the pregnancy had me reeling. I loved her figure…so curvy, so luscious. Grabbing her ass, I helped her keep her pace.
“Oh fuck, Henry,” she whispered, tipping her head back. “So thick…”
Lightning struck again, illuminating her perfect skin. She was the most beautiful creature ever created. Why did this poor bird feel such love and desire for a pitiful bloke like me? The emotions tore at my throat, leaving it raw. I had to force them back, holding them at bay, but the levy was weak and I didn’t know how long it would last.
The breath was stolen from Elaina’s body as she came. When she collapsed onto my chest, I pumped my hips a few more times before the orgasm wracked my achy spine. Our chests heaved together, but all I could think about was Elaina would forever be ruined because of me.
The emotions strangled me. I had to let them out before the grip grew too tight.
My body shuddered as they freed. The release started silently, but it wasn’t long before my sobs turned the thunder into background noise.
Elaina leaned back and took my face into her hands. “Lover…”
“I’m so sorry…so sorry.”
Her thumbs swiped away the tears flowing down my cheeks. “It’s going to be okay. We’re going to be okay.”
“I hate that I do this to you.”
“I love you…whole or broken. Always. Next to my son, you are the love of my life and nothing will ever change that. Nothing, Henry. This battle within… I am here to fight it with you. Do you hear me?”
I nodded and dropped my head onto her shoulder. She didn’t understand that she, Nicky, and my mum would be better off without me.
Chapter 38
The struggles continued on a daily basis. The voices chapped and I melted down, spending more time in my darkened room than anywhere else. However, whenever my son needed me, I was there for him.
One thing I did do every day was go for a run, lapping our street three times before going home. It was just over three miles. The destruction around the neighborhood was still bothersome, only a few people living in the other houses.
The woods at the end of street, which wrapped around the backs of the yards on our side, had a dark feel to them, as if something was lurking, waiting to jump out at me. It gave me the chills. A few times, my paranoia would rage and I would watch my back as I ran home.
I was on my last lap back when Gunther blew past me and parked his truck in his driveway. After hopping out, he stalked up to me. “Where the fuck were you?!” he yelled.
I stared at him for a moment, trying to figure out if I had missed something. “You lost me, mate.”
“No fucking shit! You need to get your act together!”
“Can you at least let me know what you’re talking about?”
“The inspector?”
I scratched at my beard. “That was today?”
He threw his arms into the air. “God, what the fuck is wrong with you?! You’re too busy with your head up your arse to be a fifty percent owner of the gym!”
“Sorry, I forgot,” I mumbled.
“I had to reschedule because he needed us both there to sign!”
“When is it?”
“Thursday at nine AM.”
“I’ve got it handled.”
“Yeah, looks like you do.”
“I did fine running the blood bank.”
“We are building this business from the ground floor, you twat. It isn’t something that was already in existence which those fucks bought out and slotted you in to. You have to manage every aspect, not just what’s in front of you!”
“I can handle it!” I yelled back.
“You’re different now than you were then. Get your head on straight and run this business with me. I’d hate to petition the courts to buy out your half!”
Floored, I couldn’t believe he would even try it. As he walked back toward his driveway, I grabbed his shoulder. “Are you threatening me?”
He looked down at my hand, then into my eyes. “Maybe I am. It’s not my responsibility to remind you to wipe your arse, let alone go to a meeting we set up months ago. Grow the fuck up!”
“I have a lot going on in my head!”
“It’s always about you, isn’t it? You think you’re the only one with problems?” His glare cooled me down. “Fuck off.” After shaking my hand free, Gunther spun back around and headed to his house.
“Shit,” I barked.
I truly felt bad. I had been so wrapped up with myself that I wasn’t on task. I wanted to prove him wrong. To be honest, I was confused as to why he didn’t understand what was going on in my head. I couldn’t exactly pull it together when it took me three passes over everything before I could even leave the fucking house.
My routine always caused me to take more time than anyone else to get ready. Elaina and my mum just accepted it, ignored my behavior, and treated my debilitating quirks as if it wasn’t a big deal. I wasn’t sure if that was how we should roll, but it’s what they decided to do, considering I refused to see another therapist. I hoped my issues would calm at some point.
With the confrontation behind me, Gunther and I worked tirelessly getting Edge ready. About a month after meeting with the inspector, opening day had arrived quicker than I would’ve liked it to. I really had stepped up my game, and Gunther appreciated my efforts. To be honest, I felt like I didn’t have a choice. I didn’t want to lose the opportunity of being a business owner.
Everyone was busy doing something to get ready for the grand opening. Cora designed and printed hundreds of flyers, then she and the kids went door-to-door, telling survivors about our mission to not only educate the world about fitness, but also to provide self-defense training. My mum offered to be the childcare provider during specific open hours. Elaina hired a receptionist, Amanda, and another trainer, Bobby, to give us a hand. She was still scouting for a female trainer.
One thing I will say is all the activity helped keep my mind tied up and my demons quiet for a while. I welcomed and enjoyed it.
Elaina and I started to get back on track, making love almost daily. We were hoping she would get pregnant again, but things hadn’t worked out yet. With a smirk, I told her I would always be willing to put in the work to achieve our goal. It felt good to be a husband again.
Once opening day arrived, I drank a cup of coffee, washed and dried the mug three times, then put it away three times. After adjusting the cabinet that housed the mugs three times, I felt okay to hop in the shower. After shampooing and washing my body three times, I dressed…one time! Same deal with brushing my teeth and adjusting my crazy hair. Personal progress. It felt bloody good.
Checking myself in the mirror, I smiled, enjoying the look of the gym’s logo, an outline of a hunting knife with Edge Fitness written along the blade, on my shirt.
I jogged down the stairs seeing Elaina on the couch, getting Nicky settled in for his morning milk. She smiled at me. “Off to your very first full day of work?”
“Yep.” I tugged on a hoodie.
“Well, you look amazing,” she murmured. “Have a great day.”
I swiped my hand over Nicky’s head as he fed, then kissed Elaina on the cheek. “Goodbye, love. I’ll see you tonight.”
“I’m proud of you. This venture is going to continue to help you. I just know it.”
“I just hope my demons don’t trample my mind today and I can keep my OCD issues under wraps while interacting with the clientele.”
“I have faith you will rock this.”
“Thank you. I needed to hear that,” I murmured.
My m
um came out of the kitchen. “Good luck!” she said with a wave.
“Thanks.”
“You’ve got this, son.”
“I do. I can handle this.”
At least I hoped so. I begged my demons to stay quiet, but I feared their put-downs while I tried to do something positive for my family and myself.
On the way to Edge, I was nervous as hell that not a single person would show at the doors. However, as I pulled into the gym’s parking lot, I was shocked to see a line of people, all dressed in workout gear, waiting outside the door. Gunther pulled in behind me and hopped out of his truck. I pulled off my helmet and glanced at him to see the look of awe on his face.
“Mate… There has to be at least fifty people here,” he said.
I smiled. “Let’s do this.”
We walked toward the crowd with a mild amount of swagger. Gunther unlocked and opened the door.
“We’ll be right with you,” he murmured.
Amanda was already inside, setting up a table with refreshments. Elaina did an amazing job hiring her. She was unique, intelligent, and full of energy. It didn’t matter what we asked of her. She did it with a smile.
“Hello, boys!” She jumped up and down, clapping. “Today’s the big day!”
I laughed. “Excited?”
“Very much! And you?”
“You have no idea.”
Bobby approached the door and tapped on the glass. Gunther let him in. “Did you see all those people out there?” he asked, looking over his shoulder.
“Pretty wild,” Gunther said. “Let’s talk for a moment, then we’ll open the doors.” The four of us put our arms around each other’s shoulders. “We are a family. Anyone who walks in here will be treated as such.” He focused on me. “We all have losses and horrid pasts stacked up against us, but this is a place where everyone can lean on one another, our clientele included. It’ll be their refuge. Their iron cathedral. Their place to relieve the stress of this new life in which we all live. Our goal today is to educate people on fitness and self-defense and, of course, sell as many memberships as possible. We’ve got this.” We exchanged a slight nod, then put our fists in the center.
“Edge!” we shouted in unison.
Gunther walked to the door and waved the crowd in. There was a quiet rumble as they gazed around at the clean lines and state of the art equipment.
I stepped in front of the group. “Welcome to Edge Fitness. I’m Henry Daniels and this is my partner in crime, Gunther Erikkson. We know we can bring a cutting edge to your fitness program with our experience and abilities. We intend to be at the forefront of the fitness market with specialized classes designed for real self-defense, along with many other programs from raising your fitness level to weight loss. If you care to take a tour, please follow along.”
After showing everyone what our facility could offer, Gunther and I spent the next two hours signing people up for a membership. More had trickled in as the day went on, and the small supply of merchandise had almost sold out. By the time we left for the evening, we were beyond stoked.
I hadn’t smiled so much since Nicky had been born, and was damn proud of what we accomplished.
Gunther jogged up the steps and opened the front door. Four of the kids were sitting at the table, eating dinner. He tousled each of their hair as he walked into the kitchen. Cora had Everette in a fabric sling wrapped around her body.
“How’s my angel?” He leaned down and brushed his lips over Everette’s head.
“She’s been cranky today. Only happy and able to sleep if she’s snuggled up tight.” Gunther smiled and leaned up against the counter. “Well, don’t leave me hanging. How’d it go?”
“Cora, it was brill. We signed up so many people.”
“Yes!”
“Henry, Bobby, and I are booked solid for personal training sessions the rest of the month.”
“Really? I am so proud of you guys!” she gushed.
“Thank you. I really appreciate all your help and support with this. Between moving, Everette, and getting the business started, I know it’s been trying.”
“I would do it all over again.” She smiled. “How did Henry do today?”
“He seemed good. I’m just waiting for the next meltdown, which probably isn’t that far away. He can’t to go too long without something setting him off.”
Cora shook her head. “God, I wish there was a way to make him understand.”
“He’s hard-headed and stubborn as a mule.”
“Sounds familiar,” Cora said with a wink.
“Nice. Always sassy, aren’t you, bird?”
“Well, how about you take your stubborn ass to the table and this sassy bird will dish up your dinner.” Gunther chuckled.
For a moment, he watched Cora flit around, getting their meal ready. He had an overwhelming need to kiss her just because of the amazing things she was doing for him and his family. Pushing off the counter, he placed himself between her and the cabinet she was heading to, his hands resting on her hips.
“What are you doing?” He brought his hand up and stroked her cheek. Cora’s eyes closed and she let out a soft sigh, but they jolted back open. She reached up and pushed his hand away. “Gunther, don’t do this to me.”
“What am I doing?”
“Unless you can commit your entire self to me, I can’t. Please respect that. I need one hundred percent, not fifty.”
“I just want to thank you.”
“Words will suffice and you’ve done so already. I need all of you. Until you’re ready to give that to me, I can’t have you doing this.”
“It’s simple affection between two people who care about one another,” Gunther countered.
“It’s so far from simple, it makes complicated look like child’s play. We’ve crossed lines.” She motioned to Everette, who was fast asleep. “And I have been left with a broken heart, which hasn’t healed yet.”
“Right,” he said and walked out to the table, sitting with the kids.
Chapter 39
Edge Fitness had been open for a little more than a month and the place was busy at all hours. After spending so much time watching from the surrounding area, Xander felt it was time to pay the gym a visit and see the action closer than the acceptable distance Erik had set forth.
Foregoing the mullet, Xander opted for a ball cap. He smirked as he looked at his reflection in a window of a storefront nearby. He had allowed his beard to grow in, giving him the lumber-sexual look instead of the eighties want-to-be rocker.
Upon approaching the gym, Xander shuddered from the thrill of teetering on the knife’s edge, stroking his already bloated ego. As usual, he pushed the limits, knowing if Erik discovered he was getting so close, there would be ramifications…such as removal from the job. If that happened, Xander was prepared to make the ultimate sacrifice.
Not himself, of course, but termination of the target.
The adrenaline surged through his body, making the buzz of the one true high Xander ever had move past the point of exhilaration. Just the possibility of an up close and personal glance at the prey drove him to leap over the rigid boundaries.
Xander walked through the door with a swagger, knowing he would just blend in while he looked around. The light floors and walls were in stark contrast to the black equipment precisely lined up, not even a little out of place. A heavy beat played through the sound system, encouraging clients to push themselves harder. Beyond the music were the clangs and bangs, grunts and growls, and harsh breathing an intense workout brings.
He looked around, focusing on every person, checking for his target, also taking an extra-long peek at the women.
“Welcome to Edge Fitness!” a chipper female’s voice said, startling him.
Xander looked at the front desk. “Good morning,” he replied with a soft smile. His gaze danced around her face. It was all he could do to stifle the groan of satisfaction over her simple beauty. She was maybe five-four, her straight brown
hair pulled back tight from her face, showing off the perfect symmetry.
She stepped from behind the counter and… Oh, goddamn me, he thought. Her black workout pants showed every exquisite curve, right along with her tight tank top, cutting low enough to show her more than ample cleavage. The need to squeeze and do a motorboat-
“Are you looking to join Edge?”
Xander shook his head. “I’m sorry?”
“Are you considering joining our gym? How about a tour?”
“I would love a quick tour. Do you have a day pass?”
“We do.”
“Excellent.”
She held out her hand. “I’m Amanda Jones.”
Accepting her gesture, he said, “Johnnie Randall.”
“Follow me.”
No fucking problem, Xander thought as he walked behind Amanda, watching her every step. When he realized the taut bounce of her ass had him too distracted, he moved to her side. Then he couldn’t shift his gaze from the glorious cleavage, which was clearly calling his name. She showed him the entire place, but he didn’t see Luke or Gunther…or anything else.
As they headed back to the reception desk, he asked, “Who is the owner?”
“We have two wonderful owners and managers… Henry Daniels and Gunther Erikkson.”
“Are they in today?”
She waved to the offices behind the desk. “Today is Gunther’s late day, and Henry’s preparing for a meeting with a whey protein company who has all sorts of tasty and healthy shakes, drinks, and supplements. There’s a strong possibility of a sponsorship program, which would be just amazing for Henry and Gunther.”
“Sounds like you’re already selling for them,” Xander said with a wink.
Amanda laughed. “It does, doesn’t it? It was a great opportunity that walked through the door. One of our client’s family members owns the company and recommended Edge as an up-and-coming fitness and self-defense institution. They sent a shipment in for us to sample. It’s all very exciting!”
She did a little clap in front of her chest, causing a subtle fleshy wave that, once again, forced Xander to stifle a groan. Sweet mercy. “Yes, indeed. Looks to be exceptionally exciting,” he murmured.
Blind Faith (Shattered Lives, Book Four) Page 34
