He had to get her to fall in love with him, with her life here, and with the opportunities that were coming her way, because otherwise he suspected she’d leave him and the pets and never look back. He squeezed her tight as if he could literally hold on to her while her past crept inexorably toward them, making her want to flee.
The fact that he had not been completely honest with her when she had picked him up at Marty’s Pub—that they had met before, that he was completely knocked sideways by her, and that he knew she’d been involved with his cousin—made him feel a sharp twist of guilt in his gut. But it had been such a surprise to see her and, frankly, she had taken his breath away exactly like she had the first time he saw her. He did not want to lose her again.
Not for nothing, he wondered if he should scrap the plan to romance her into his life and tell her everything. That he had fallen for her the very first time he saw her and that he didn’t care what had happened between her and Preston, no matter how awful it was, he still wanted her. No, he couldn’t risk it. He suspected that she’d think it was a line, that he was just like his cousin, a user, and he couldn’t stand that.
He knew from his work as a physical therapist that pushing through the hurt, the fear, or whatever it was that was holding his client back was usually the only way to get whole again. But Carly, with her refusal to have any relationships beyond friendship, was more broken than most and he had no idea how to help her.
He wasn’t stupid. He knew his cousin Preston had done something to hurt her. He saw it in the flash of pain that lit her brown eyes every time his name was mentioned. He’d noticed when he mentioned that he’d thought she and Preston were a couple that she had neither confirmed nor denied their status. He suspected it was because something had happened between them, and knowing Preston, it had been unpleasant.
He would give anything to protect her from her past and spare her the pain, but running into her again after all these years felt like fate. No matter how closed off to relationships she was, he couldn’t ignore the hopeful possibility that if he could help her put the past behind her and look to the future, then she might choose to move forward with him.
When he stepped back from her, a long lock of her dark hair brushed across her cheek. He reached up, hooked it with a finger, and tucked it behind her ear. Her hair was so soft, he wanted to bury his fingers in it and pull her close. He didn’t.
She glanced up at him and the startled look of want in her gaze made him suck in a breath. The stark need in her deep brown eyes made his heart hammer triple time as if gearing up for a marathon of making her moan his name in that special way she had. James blinked, trying to push aside the memory of her coming undone for him, just him. It about killed him to drop his hands and back away, but he did it.
He forced himself to embrace the bigger picture. If they could get through the next few days and she still looked at him like that then this whole torturous party would be worth it. God, he hoped so at any rate, because now that he’d found her he never wanted to let her go.
He glanced away, afraid that if he didn’t, he might lose control of his good intentions. Instead, he focused on his sister, who was watching them with a dawning look of awareness in her eyes. Uh-oh.
“Correct me if I’m wrong, but you two didn’t just meet here at this bakery, did you?” Lola appeared at his elbow with her arms crossed over her chest and her diamond-studded eyebrow raised inquisitively.
Carly glanced at him with a newly resolved expression, sort of like a soldier heading into battle, that morphed into a mischievous grin as she said, “Oh, dear. She’s onto us. Shall we tell her how we met?”
James narrowed his gaze. He knew that look of hers. It was wicked and made him want to do deliciously naughty things to her. If Carly wanted to play, fine. He was game if she was.
“By all means,” he said.
“We met in the produce section of the grocery store,” she said. She waggled her eyebrows at Lola. “We grappled over melons.”
James barked out a laugh. It was on the tip of his tongue to ask, “Whose melons?” but sanity prevailed and he said nothing. The image of Carly and her melons splayed out before him on her bed could not be sponged from his brain, however. Man, she was turning him into a pervert.
He felt a bead of sweat run down the back of his neck. A sly glance her way and he saw her bite her lip as if to keep from laughing. Oh, she was wicked. He wondered what it said about him that he liked it, he really liked it. Fortunately, or maybe unfortunately, she was nowhere near done tormenting him.
He glanced at his sister, who was looking at them wide-eyed while Jillian was quietly chuckling because she knew the truth, or thought she did.
“That’s not exactly it,” he said to Lola.
“That’s right!” Carly snapped her fingers. “We actually met on the set of a porno film. Did you know your brother’s porn star name is James Wood? I was cast as Handy Hannah, his official fluffer, and, you know, one thing just led to another.”
Lola’s eyes got huge and then, catching on that Carly was yanking her chain, she tipped her head back and laughed.
“That’s hilarious,” she cried, letting out a big guffaw.
“It’s not that funny,” he said. He pretended to look offended. “I could star in a porno if I wanted.”
This set all three of the women to laughing, and James turned to Carly and said, “You could back me up a little here.”
“Why?” she asked. “Because I have hands-on experience?”
James would have laughed but then he glanced at her and caught her looking at him through her thick dark eyelashes with those big brown eyes that were full of naughty intentions. He let out a hiss of breath as his body reacted overwhelmingly with need. He pulled at the neck of his shirt, trying to get some cool air on his hot skin. It didn’t help.
He leaned close and whispered in her ear, “Sweet Jesus, sunshine, you would be the only fluffer in the history of the porn industry who never had to touch a guy to get him in shape—just look at him like that and he’d be rarin’ to go.”
James forced himself to step back and caught sight of her self-satisfied smirk. That was it. Turnabout was fair play.
“Actually,” he said to his sister, who was still laughing. “I came across Carly eating an ice cream cone and when she caught sight of me, she sucked in a chunk of ice cream and started to choke, so I had to give her mouth-to-mouth. It was just like in a movie, with her about to expire and me cupping the back of her head and holding her still while I fit my mouth over hers so that our lips formed a seal so I could breathe the life back into her.”
He gave Carly side eye to see how she was reacting. Her cheeks were flushed. Good. A small puff of air burst out of her slightly parted lips and she looked a bit dazed. James smiled, feeling quite pleased with himself.
Carly DeCusati could pretend that whatever was between them was a one-night deal in the past, but he knew it wasn’t. If she ever waved him in, and he was going to do everything he could to convince her to do just that, he was going to ruin her, completely ruin her, for any other man. Ever.
Carly cleared her throat and her voice was a bit hoarse when she spoke. “Can a person actually choke on ice cream?”
James grinned at her. He really liked flustered Carly.
Lola glanced between them. Her gaze was shrewd. “You’re not going to tell me the real story, are you?”
In perfect sync, they looked at her and shook their heads. “No.”
“Fine, keep your secret—for now,” Lola said. She sauntered back over to the booth where Jillian sat and the two women began discussing flavors of whoopie pie.
James turned back to Carly and when she met his gaze, he saw the telltale flash of pink bloom across her cheeks. Excellent. She was nowhere near as immune to him as she wanted him to believe. It was a solid start.
“I suppose the mos
t likely story of how we met would be that I came to you as a client and you nursed me back to health,” Carly said, keeping her voice low so that only James could hear her. “We could say it was love at first stretch band.”
James felt his heart do an abrupt stutter-stop. He could feel the blood drain from his head and for a second he really thought he might pass out. She so blithely tossed out the “L” word in regard to them. She had no idea. None. That he had fallen in love with her at first sight years ago. But how could she when she had no recollection of him?
The reality of the situation, the sudden awareness of the perilousness of his position, hit him hard and it wrecked him. He knew he was making the biggest play of his life here and he desperately hoped it did not blow up in his face.
“James? Are you all right?” she asked.
Her voice was soft. He could hear the concern in her tone and he knew he had to get a grip on the riot of emotion that was rocketing through him. Suddenly, this whole party seemed fraught with disaster. A moment ago, he’d been sure he knew what he was doing but now he wondered if at the end of it, he was going to be the one damaged beyond repair.
“I was just teasing,” she said. She looked uncertain. “I mean obviously there is no love here. We barely know each other.”
“Right,” he said. He forced his lips to curve up in what he hoped looked like a smile but he feared was more a feral show of teeth. “Maybe we should just go with me hiring you for the whoopie pies for the party. You know, keep it simple.”
She tipped her head to the side and studied him. She looked like she suspected something wasn’t quite right but wasn’t sure if she should ask or not. Her usual sense of boundaries must have kicked in because she just shrugged.
“It’s your show,” she said. “If you don’t want to cop to a smokin’ hot one-night stand with me, that’s fine.”
James took a steadying breath. He had to play this very carefully.
“I like that you admit it was smokin’ hot,” he said. He glanced at Lorelei, relieved to see that she wasn’t paying any attention to them, before shifting his gaze back to Carly. “But I think we should keep our first meeting on the down-low.”
There was a flash of hurt on her face, gone before it fully materialized, and James wanted to kick himself. She probably thought he was judging her for how they hooked up. He would never. Not ever.
He just needed more time. He needed her to be more invested in them before he went for full disclosure. She didn’t remember meeting him and he was okay with that, but how would she feel if he told her he had fallen in love with her all the way back then, eleven years ago? She’d think he was crazy. She’d be right. He was crazy—about her.
“That’s cool,” she said.
Carly turned away from him to head back into the kitchen and James knew that he had just lost something, a momentary connection with her beyond the physical. It made him want to curse and turn back the clock one minute so he could not be so ham-fisted and stupid in regard to them, but her past with Preston made that impossible.
She was clearly suspicious of men and relationships and since he didn’t know what exactly had happened between her and Preston, wasn’t sure he wanted to know for that matter, he had to proceed with caution. Like a tightrope walker in high wind, he would progress this relationship step by step and hope he didn’t go splat.
Chapter 22
Carly hadn’t really contemplated what all was involved in planning a party at a location that was under construction. The next few days were spent using all of her former buyer skills as she shopped for the party essentials like food and booze. It got more complicated as she looked for a band and photographer, but Emma, having just gotten married, was happy to share the list of vendors she’d interviewed for her wedding.
Of course, helping this much with the party meant that Carly was spending all of her free time at the lighthouse. She arrived when her shift at Making Whoopie was done and didn’t leave until well into the night. James seemed more than happy with this arrangement and frequently met her at the door with dinner prepared. The two of them quickly fell into a routine of sharing the news of their days and then working on the party prep.
When the store Penmans in Portland scheduled Carly for an interview, James sat through her practice presentation on sales trends and how her connections from her former position in New York put her in a unique position to buy in-demand items at low cost to the company. They even did a quick recon trip to Penmans’ flagship store in Portland to analyze what was currently on the racks and how Carly could improve it.
James had seemed highly invested in her getting the job, something she tried not to overthink. On the day of the interview, she had left Making Whoopie in her business suit and heels to go to Penmans’ corporate offices for her interview, and James had popped into the bakery to wish her luck. When Jillian had observed that it was a total boyfriend maneuver, Carly had ignored her.
Of course, the first person she texted after the interview was James. She tried to tell herself it was because he had put in so much effort on her behalf, but the truth was, she’d been so excited by the company’s forward thinking corporate atmosphere, and the possibility of buying for the entire women’s department and not just the lingerie department, that she had to tell someone or she feared she’d explode, and that someone was James.
She felt as if he was the only one who truly understood how important it was to her to get this job, to get her sense of herself back. She was a fashion buyer—it was what she loved and what she wanted to do—and she hated that she felt like such a failure at the career she had worked at for so long.
If she was honest, she had begun to look forward to her time with James. She frequently brought Ike and Saul with her, and they quickly formed a pack with Hot Wheels, who was always eager to see his two friends. The third night in a row, the evening after her interview, when she brought her animals with her, James called her out on it.
“You’re trying to get them acclimated to their new home, aren’t you?” he asked.
“Me?” She put her hand over her chest in a protestation of innocence.
They were sitting at the kitchen counter, sharing lasagna and salad, both of which James had fixed, while the animals cavorted around the newly cleaned and polished great room.
James shook his head at her. Clearly, he wasn’t fooled for a hot minute.
“They seem to like it here,” she said.
She turned on her stool to watch Ike riding on Hot Wheels’s harness while they raced Saul up and down the hallway to the rehabilitation center. James followed her gaze and then turned back to her. His look was considering.
“What about you?” he asked. “Do you like it here?”
She sensed his question had a deeper meaning that she chose to ignore. Instead, she took it at face value and glanced around the room.
James had halted the construction on his home temporarily so it was free of tools, dust, and thick plastic sheeting. The full potential was just beneath the surface and she could see the gem that it was going to be when it was done. Like it? She loved it. But for some reason, she thought she shouldn’t share her enthusiasm with him. She didn’t know why, but her sense of self-preservation kicked in and she trusted it.
“It’s cute.” She shrugged.
“Cute?” He was outraged. “Thanks, that’s exactly what I was going for, you know, along with quaint and adorable.”
Carly smiled into her glass of wine. It was a luscious pinot noir and she felt it relaxing her, dropping down her first line of defense and making her think it was okay to flirt with James. It wasn’t, but she couldn’t seem to stop herself.
“Is your bedroom really at the top of the lighthouse?” she asked.
His eyebrows lifted. “Yes, why? Do you want the tour?”
“Well, I was thinking we could light up the top of the lighthouse for you
r grandfather,” she said. “I want to use strings of LEDs to spell out Happy Birthday.”
It was a half-truth. She also really wanted to see his bedroom. She wanted to see what it said about James the man. As in: was he messy, neat, somewhere in between? It was none of her business, but she still wanted to appease her curiosity.
“Why do I get the feeling you’re scouting the place for your pets?” he asked.
She shrugged. That wasn’t it but he didn’t need to know that.
“So, you’ve had no takers so far?” he asked, gesturing at the animals.
“Knees to chest! Knees to chest! Move it!” Ike squawked from his perch on Hot Wheels’s halter. She felt her lips curve up at Ike’s antics. He was such a funny bird.
“No,” she said.
“Shocker.”
Carly laughed. It hit her in that moment that she liked James, really liked him. He was funny and patient and kind, and the fact that he was freaking gorgeous did not hurt either.
“Come on,” he said. “I’ll give you the tour.”
He rose from his seat and paused beside Hot Wheels. Ike stepped readily onto James’s hand and allowed him to put him in his travel cage. Carly was impressed, as up until now Ike had only let Carly and Gavin pick him up.
She took one more sip of her wine and left her napkin beside her plate. James waited for her by a door on the far side of the kitchen. Once she joined him, he opened the door, which led into a narrow dark hallway.
He flipped a switch and Carly noted that he had to duck his head to traverse the closed-in tunnel. At the far end was another solid door and James pushed it open. He flicked on another light switch and the spiral staircase in front of them lit up like a runway in a trail of cool blue LED lights that wound their way all the way to the top. Behind the stairs, Carly saw all of the construction equipment that had been moved from the house.
“Convenient,” she said.
“Hmm,” he hummed as if resigned.
He took her hand and together they climbed the metal staircase to the top. Carly was winded halfway up but pretended that she wasn’t by turning her head away and mouth breathing. She noticed that James slowed his pace and suspected she had not fooled him in the slightest.
Barking Up the Wrong Tree Page 20
